Ascent of the Thunder Road
by Akktri
Summary: What happens to Elliott and ET after the first film.
1. Chapter 1: Prologue

I made friends with a creature from outer space. For one week, I was the luckiest kid in the world.

I don't feel so lucky anymore.

There are consequences to helping an alien escape from the government. Because I helped him, only ET got to go home.

I should have joined him in the spaceship.

The men in Hazmat suits grabbed me the moment ET's ship disappeared. My big brother Michael and his friends tried to fight back, but then the adults pulled out weapons.

Mom, who had been watching all of this happening, tried her best to get them to release me, you know, arguing that since the alien was gone, and I was perfectly healthy, they had no right to do anything to me, but they only pushed her away and threw me into the back of a black van. Someone said that I wasn't healthy, I still looked sick. I didn't feel sick.

They did radiation tests, sticking me with needles and heart monitors and everything. I even had my hands cuffed to the stretcher because, I guess, they thought I'd pull another escape attempt.

I could hear my sister Gertie screaming, but they'd put her in a different truck.

"What are you going to do with her?" I asked, but the people in space suits weren't much on conversation.

The truck kind of looked like an ambulance on the inside, or maybe an FBI surveillance vehicle. They had television cameras, oscilloscopes, radar, and a bunch of scientific equipment. I could hear the crackle of their radios, the squeaking of the reel to reel magnetic tape on their refrigerator sized computers.

Still giddy from my recent victory, I chuckled, grinning at my captors. "We beat you. You'll never see ET again."

A fat face peered at me through the plastic window on one of the space suits. "Yeah? That means you'll never see him either."

I kept smiling. "It doesn't matter. He can go home now."

The guy had nothing to say to that.

The van rumbled noisily away from the clearing where the spaceship had been.

I touched my chest, thinking about ET's last words to me. That he'd always be in my heart.

When we at last arrived at our destination, and the men had begun their work, _I_ would be the one crying, "Home phone."

Unfortunately, no telephone on earth could fix this.


	2. Chapter 2: Prisoner

The van bumped along for a few more minutes. I heard the crunch of gravel, then the road smoothed out. From my vantage point, I could only see the horizon out the back window, tree branches turning to telephone poles, the stars in the night sky.

"Where are you taking me?" I asked the suited men, but nobody answered the question.

"When can I see mom again?"

No answer to that either.

I stared up at the ceiling, watching the street lights cutting lines across the upholstered surface.

My mind flashed back to the events of the previous days.

I thought about Jamie, that cute pigtailed girl from my science class.

We'd freed a bunch of frogs from dissection. I kissed her full on the mouth. I experienced bodily sensations I never knew I had.

I remember feeling giddy, light headed, like I'd had too much cold medicine, but the feelings I had for her were real.

She kissed me back. I know she resisted it a little, but she wasn't exactly opposed to it.

I had another flash of memory, not mine this time. It was ET, taking a beer out of the fridge at home, drinking it as he watched _Casablanca_. I get this feeling that he somehow `pushed' me to kiss Jamie, sending this thought like `Okay kids, go to town.'

Strangely, it got me thinking about dad.

I could never figure out how mom and dad got together. My only guess is that alcohol had been involved. Maybe he's alcoholic still. Mom doesn't like to talk about him. The week ET showed up, we were so desperate to see dad again that we dug through his old stuff, and were smelling his shirts, you know, to remember him.

I saw another mental flash, this one of a chemical equation. I didn't know what it meant, nor, in my current situation, could I write any of it down. Something about plants. The image faded with the lights flickering on the van roof.

I awoke to the sound of an angry buzzing noise and the rattle of a fence. Through the back window, I saw coils of barbed wire and red lights moving around. I heard someone up front talking about security clearances.

The back doors opened, and I found a group of men in army fatigues shining their flashlights in my face.

The doors closed again, and the van rolled to a stop somewhere.

After a long delay, they took my stretcher out, and I got wheeled through a long plastic temporary tunnel, similar to the one they set up around the house the day they came for ET. It looked like the inside of a vacuum cleaner hose, with windows.

The tube ended in a sterile hospital corridor. They pushed me past a set of double doors, and they took me off the bed, ordering me to strip and stand on a conveyor belt in a decontamination station.

It reminded me of something I saw in a movie, maybe _Doctor No_ or that one about the space virus. I got sprayed with water, chemicals, powders, baked in a heat lamp, you name it, and then, at the end of the whole process, I didn't even get my clothing back. Instead they made me wear a white jumpsuit.

Despite all these precautions, my captors still wore space suits around me.

They told me to follow them. When I refused, they just grabbed me, dragging me into a padded cell.

I screamed and tried to run out, but they only injected me with sedative. I awoke alone, imprisoned in the little room.

I curled into a ball and cried.

My cell had a mirror. I'd seen enough cop shows to know that it was a two way. I'd played around with a few at funhouses before. If you pressed your face right up against the glass and cupped your hands around to block the light, you could sometimes see through to the other side.

On the other side of the wall, they had a setup like IBM, a whole bay of those refrigerator sized computers with reel to reel tape, a movie camera propped up against the mirror to record my every move.

Nobody sat at the desks - it seemed they'd all gone to lunch, or breakfast, or gone home for the day. I sat down on the floor, absently staring at the white walls.

One time when I was bad, dad threatened to lock me in a room and give me nothing to read but _Mary Worth_ comics. I wondered where my comics were.

I thought about the lessons I taught ET about my world. They seemed so dumb. I didn't teach him anything important about our history or culture or anything, I just showed him my toys. What must his people think of us?

"The human told me they eat a thing called a peanut. It is a large porcelain thing you put metallic coins inside. They must have terrible indigestion. Humans also enjoy torturing fish with little plastic idols."

That's if ET understood a word I was saying at all. If he had to write a report on us, I figured it was going to be pretty bad.

How old was he anyway? He looked like an old man, but he could have been a kid.

It had been night when I'd been captured. Making an educated guess, I figured I'd awakened right around the time to watch crappy daytime TV, _General Hospital, As The World Turns_ , _One Day at a Time_ , and Bob Vila. Roughly 11 A.M. I guess Indians aren't the only ones who gauge time based on mythology.

Anyone can tell you that kids have a low tolerance for boredom. We can't just sit in silent introspection for hours at a time. I started picking apart the wall padding.

Admittedly, not an easy task, but I had grown my fingernails long enough, and it looked like someone had worked on the pad a little beforehand. I teased the stuffing out, then gasped in surprise as a key fell to the floor.

Not a key to my cell. _That_ only opened from the outside. I sat on the floor, pretended not to be concealing it inside my jumpsuit.

Feeling an ache in my stomach, I peered through the window again.

I saw only one person in the computer room, some buzzcut guy in a green uniform. I knocked to get his attention, but he was busy on the phone.

"Colonel North, please," I could just barely hear him saying.

He followed this with something indistinct. I pressed my ear to the glass.

"...I'm not seeing any weapon potential here. It's just a kid. The _thing_ got away from us."

He started discussing transfers of guns and ammunition.

Losing interest, I knocked harder.

He glanced in my direction, kept talking on the phone. I slumped back on the floor.

An hour later, two men in spacesuits put a caged monkey in my cell. I thought about sneaking past them, but these are grown men we're talking about.

They shut the door, leaving me alone with the thing. I guess they were trying to see if I had a disease that would kill someone, like how they put canaries in coal mines.

I would have let the chimp out, but the cage had a padlock on the lid, a padlock that didn't match the shape of my key.

The monkey started off screeching and looking antsy, but when I looked him in the eyes, he calmed down.

"Yeah," I muttered. "I'm a prisoner here too."

The chimp grunted, stuck its paw between the bars. I shook it, and I got a monkeyshine.

...And Gertie's hair ribbon.

"Hey! Where did you get that!"

The chimp put a finger to his big lips, indicated the room number with hand signs.

I glanced at the door, groaning in frustration. "It's no use. I can't even get out of this cell!"

The monkey grinned.


	3. Chapter 3: Henry

The monkey didn't offer me any immediate solutions to my imprisonment, but he _did_ offer me a banana.

I was so starved that I actually ate it. "Thank you...Did _you_ get anything to eat?"

The chimp whimpered a little, rubbing his belly. The message seemed to be `It's okay, I'll be fine.'

"What's your name?"

It responded with sign language.

I don't know anything about ASL, but I had this... _feeling_ that it was supposed to mean Henry...and when I looked into his eyes, I also had a hunch that it had its own name, something that didn't translate directly into English. It more or less meant `Strength.'

I noticed he had a cut on his foot. It appeared as if he'd been given some rough treatment by his captors.

Feeling sorry for him, I touched the wound and found myself saying "Ouch," without even thinking about why.

I felt, I don't know, some kind of warm energy flowing from my hand to the monkey's injury, and then my finger's glowing.

When I noticed what was happening, and saw the wound healing up, I yelped and hid my hand up my sleeve. "Oh shit oh shit!"

I'd seen enough movies to guess that if they saw me glowing, or making objects levitate with my mind, the government people would never let me leave.

I tucked my finger into my armpit, waited for that part of my prison uniform to stop shining like a Glo-Worm.

The light slowly but surely died out. Well, as far as I could tell.

I backed away from the cage, staring at the chimp, and my hand.

I briefly entertained a strange thought, that maybe ET thought of _himself_ as the kid in the padded room, and _I_ was the monkey in the cage.

I sat on the floor, listening to the primate making soft "Ook" noises as it stared back at me.

There was something weird and gentle about Henry's eyes. When the light reflected off its pupils in just the right way, I caught a flash of something like a memory...but not, like it were happening right now.

I saw the interior of a spaceship, one that looked like a forest. A group of five creatures, members of ET's species, huddled around a big tree in its center, silently working together on mysterious projects.

Squat little frog-like bodies, large heads, light brown-olive skin. To the untrained eye, the aliens all looked the same, but you could say the same about human beings. If you looked closely at these ET's, they had distinguishing features, birthmarks, scars, one even had a little facial hair. I knew which one was my ET.

The navigator had his hands on a set of glowing crystalline mushrooms. Somehow the things allowed him to see the ship's position in space without a window. I think it connected to his mind. Other aliens were busy... _gardening_. They had samples of plants from all over earth, some really beautiful stuff from Hawaii and Japan. One of them was putting Gertie's pot of geraniums in better soil. I saw a bunch of vegetation that I didn't recognize from any encyclopedia, stuff from other planets with names that I didn't recognize, but came to me when I looked at them.

Their ship provided everything they needed. The plants gave them air, food, juice, even a source of electrical power.

The ship also had a...basement, where they kept zoological specimens.

I got the sense that this were a kind of Noah's ark.

Near the sleeping quarters on the lower floor, he lay in a reclining bed that looked like a pumpkin somehow grown in the shape of a chaise lounge. The glowing roots of the big console tree upstairs came down in this place, wreathing his body, connecting with a pair of crystal mushrooms at the head of his bed.

Another alien observed...something in ET's brain. They seemed to be debriefing him.

A crystal orb near the bed displayed scenes from earth, straight from his brain.

The first thing I saw were clips of urban poor in places like Syria, Lebanon and West Germany throwing rocks at tough looking guys with riot shields, you know, the kind of stuff Peter Jennings shows all the time on World News Tonight. For a soundtrack, I heard John Mellencamp's _Hurts So Good_.

I saw an atom bomb exploding, archival footage of Nazis goose stepping through Berlin, and the inside of my closet.

ET spent a lot of time in that closet, so much that it looked like his crystal got stuck for a moment, but then i saw him playing with my radio, listening to _Come on Eileen_ and Journey's _Wheel in the Sky_.

He hid...a lot. Like a dream, it flashed to the reasons why, all those men in biohazard suits.

So that's what ET's doing, I thought. Giving his report.

And then I see myself in the orb, not a memory, but of me as I was at that very moment, in the padded cell.

ET reached out to me...in the exact direction I watched him from. _"Elliott!"_

I saw a blinding flash, and the vision disappeared. I found myself curled up in a ball on the floor.

I could only hope I hadn't been glowing the whole time.

An hour later, the men came and took Henry away.

The monkey screeched and clawed at the sides of the cage as it bumped the threshold of my cell. Before disappearing, it slyly flashed me a thumb's up, then pretended to be sucking its thumb like a monchichi.

When the door clicked shut, I noticed it didn't close all the way.

Henry had stuck something into the locking mechanism.


	4. Chapter 4: Gertie

I crept up to the door, listening for sounds of people. When I heard nothing, I cracked the door, peering into the hallway.

I knew they had cameras recording me behind the two way, but judging by what I had seen a few minutes ago, nobody was actually watching.

It definitely looked like a hospital.

I hate hospitals.

Gray corridors stretching both ways, into a maze of other gray corridors.

I had to find a way out. Somehow.

But first, Gertie.

Nobody seemed to be patrolling the hallways, at least for the moment.

Like a hospital, they had signs telling you directions. Although it might have been clever to throw people off by not having any, the government didn't want their employees getting lost on the way to the bathroom... _or Room 206._

I tiptoed down the corridor to my left, peering around the corner.

I saw a security guard stepping into a restroom.

I had to go too, but this wasn't the time.

I followed the signage, checking the numbers on the closed metal doors.

Hearing footsteps coming my way, I ducked into a breakroom, diving under a table.

A pair of boots clomped in.

I watched the figure in green clothing put change into a Coke machine.

He grabbed a glass bottle, tugged on it, but the roll bars refused to let go of the product.

He shook the machine, kicked it with his boot, tried to pull the bottle free again.

"Son of a bitch."

Still grumbling, he bought a packet of cigarettes from the machine next to it.

The moment he lit up, the Coke popped out of the other machine, shattering on the floor. The liquid pooled my way, seeping under the table.

The man swore, got himself a coffee instead.

I heard him slurp the drink, then flinched as he noisily snatched up wads of paper towels.

He squatted down to clean up the mess. My heart leapt into my throat when I saw his head turning my way.

With as much silence as I could muster, I darted out from under the table, racing into the hallway with my pulse pounding in my head.

201...202...

When I found the door, I pulled out the key, trying it in the lock.

It didn't work. I mean, _why would it?_ Some guy just tucked it in the padded wall.

I sighed. If Gertie was in there, how was I to get her out?

I heard bootsteps again.

It wasn't very smart to make noise, but I _had_ to know if Henry was right, so I knocked.

"Gertie!" I hissed.

No answer.

 _"Gertie!"_ Any louder and the guy in boots would hear me. I kept knocking.

"Big brother?"

"Gertie!"

"How'd you get out?" she asked.

"It doesn't matter! I...I'm going to get you out of there...somehow." I glanced back up the hallway, trying to think if I'd seen any place that might contain a bobby pin or a paper clip.

The door popped open, and there was my sister, also clad in a bland prison uniform, her hair robbed of decoration.

I didn't ask how the door got open. There wasn't time.

She rushed up and hugged me, crying on my chest. "I want mommy!"

I rubbed her back. "Me too. C'mon. Let's get out of here."

Easier said than done. Nothing was clearly labeled `exit' except a fire door that would set off an alarm the moment you pushed on the handle. I had to steer Gertie away from it.

I figured the men hadn't taken me far from their front door, so I retraced my steps back toward my cell. Admittedly not the greatest plan, but it was all I could think of at the moment.

"How did you get out?" I whispered as I led her past my room.

"I don't know. It just came open. What about you?"

"A monkey helped me."

 _"Henry,_ you mean?"

I stopped, gawking at her. " _That's really his name?_ How...?"

She shrugged, answering my question the wrong way. "I asked the nice lady with the granola bars."

I frowned. _"You got granola bars?"_

Gertie nodded. "What did _you_ get for breakfast?"

"Never mind," I groaned, pulling her further down the tunnel.

We snuck past a room full of ladies with electric typewriters, file cabinets and noisy phones.

The air was filled with the sounds of clacking, phone conversations, mimeograph and Xerox machines. They had a fancy new telephone that made copies. That thing made a lot of noise too.

"I think that black lady saw us," Gertie whispered.

Scowling, I glanced back for a second.

There was literally only one non-white face in the sea of women in skirted military uniforms. The woman didn't look up from her hammering typewriter.

"C'mon," I muttered.

"She looks lonely."

"Do you want to keep her company, or do you want to see mom?"

Gertie whimpered and clutched my hand.

We cracked a set of double doors, slipped into the next hallway.

Spotting a guard in a glass windowed security booth, we both ducked, creeping around below his field of vision.

"What now?" Gertie hissed.

"I don't know. If we move that door in any way, he'll see us."

I heard gibbering noises, then the door to the booth creaked open.

"Henry!" Gertie exclaimed.

"Shh!" I pointed to the door we'd been trying to sneak through.

"But what about Henry?"

I heard the guard shouting as the monkey screeched and attacked him. "I think he's helping us. C'mon."

The door next to the booth was locked, but the key actually worked. We entered another gray hallway.

"Now what do we do?" my sister asked.

"I...haven't thought that far ahead."

Hearing the sound of clopping high heels, we pressed our backs against a door, the recessed frame offering us a slight amount of concealment.

The heels clopped closer.

A female figure stepped around the corner. White lady, red hair, gray pantsuit.

"Hey!" Gertie cried. "It's the nice lady!"

She moved her arm to wave, but I held it down. "We can't trust her!"

The woman smiled, marched closer and waved to us. _"Hello, children."_

A moment later, Henry came scampering up to her, climbing up on her shoulder.

It made soft "Ook" noises, saying `I'm sorry' with its face.

The woman fed him a biscuit.

The door behind me came open, and a pair of soldiers grabbed us.


	5. Chapter 5: Escape

They split us up again.

I thought the men were going to drag me back to my cell, but they instead took me to a kiddie room.

It had a puzzle piece playmat on the floor, educational toys, shelves full of children's books, a little kid sized couch, and a round table with a He-Man Castle Grayskull playset.

Since it was no use running from the guards, I sat down at the table and played with the action figures, flipping the Jawbridge open, posing Skeletor.

A guy in a gray wool herringbone suit came in with a folder, a pint carton of milk and one of those peel lid disposable bowls of Cheerios.

He set the food and a spoon in front of me, pulling up a chair. "You were in close contact with the creature, and we weren't sure what toxins it spread to you."

I dug into the cereal, not bothering to look up at the guy's face.

"We had to make sure you weren't carrying anything contagious, so we had you under observation for twelve hours."

He was the kind of guy that crossed his legs, probably a shrink. I didn't respond or look at him.

"Henry seems fine. Since you've already been through decontamination, I think it's safe to assume that there isn't a health risk."

He slid an 8X10 color photograph across the table, one depicting a strange assemblage of things from my house: An umbrella, Gertie's Speak & Spell, a Fisher Price record player with a saw blade on the turntable. "We found this in the forest. What does it do?"

I swallowed. Before taking our last bike ride together, ET instructed me to load the basket and my backpack with those items. I didn't know what the hell he wanted them for, but I knew they were important.

After the first mile, I _really_ wanted to ditch that heavy phonograph.

"Why are you asking me?" I said in between mouthfuls.

 _"You were with the creature. You saw it put this together."_

He was right. I _knew_ it was a space phone, but I didn't feel like talking.

"Initially, we thought your friend had reverse engineered the turntable to serve as a _wind turbine_ , _using the movements of a tree_ to spin the saw blade, but the amount of scratch marks from the fork seem to be a little... _light_ for electricity. You get what I'm saying?"

I didn't answer.

A glance upward told me all I needed to know about the man. His name was Keys, the long nosed brunette guy that had been hounding me and ET the moment called the cops.

He showed me a picture of the saw blade with the fork tied to the phonograph's center spindle, then a close-up of the scratches. "Anyways, they were saying you would have gotten a better charge from cranking it by hand."

I mutely set the bowl aside, playing with the toys.

"We think that the umbrella serves as a parabolic reflector, and the dismantled Speak & Spell seems to be set up for the sending and receiving messages, but we still can't figure out what the turntable is used for. Care to enlighten me?"

I'd seen ET tinkering with the inner parts of the phonograph, but I had no clue what he was doing. You'd need a degree in electronics. "I don't know. I'm just a kid."

The man leaned forward. " _A very special kid._ You've just been in contact with an intelligence possessing technology far surpassing our own by several decades."

"That doesn't make me a genius."

"It doesn't make you stupid, either...Elliott, _where's Michael?_ "

"What?"

 _"Your brother._ He and his friends ran off into the woods when we captured you. Any idea where he may have gone?"

I shrugged. "He probably went home. The only thing we planned for was helping ET."

"We checked your house already. _And_ his friend's houses. Even your mother doesn't know where to look, _and she's worried sick_. You must have _some idea_ where he was going."

I had a mental image of him and his friends ditching their bikes and hiding in a nearby lake until the search party went away. There was a natural cave they knew about, one you had to swim to, to get inside. They had a stash of supplies, beer, canned oysters, beef jerky, a couple cans of pork and beans. They started a fire in the little cavern, drying their clothing. The can of beans blew up because they didn't open it before placing it on the flames.

"Why do you think _I_ know anything? I was in the back of your van the whole time."

The man steepled his fingers. _"He never said anything to you?_ Never mentioned any places he might try to hide out?"

"What time is it?" I asked as I dropped the Whiplash action figure through a trapdoor in the little castle.

"Why? You got to be somewhere?"

I opened my mouth to say something, but then a labcoated guy came in, whispering something to my interrogator. The two left the room in a hurry.

I spotted a camera on the ceiling, but I figured I could still sneak a couple items out, something to aid my escape.

In the corner, they had a Discovery Toys Marbleworks kit. I pocketed the marbles, then checked around the bookcases.

On one shelf, I found a Badge-A-Minit button, one reading `IALAC', corresponding to the `I Am Loveable and Capable' kids book about self esteem gathering dust in the corner. The book was depressing, but the button could easily be dismantled, exposing the sharp and pointy thing inside.

I tried to take apart a GI Joe vehicle, but it was all bendy or brittle plastic, so I instead worked on a die cast metal car, attempting to pry the tires off its axle.

The room had only one door, but when I bounced a super ball off the roof, I noticed the ceiling panels could be moved.

I quietly set the He-Man stuff on the floor, climbing up on the table. I couldn't quite reach.

When I tried scaling the bookcase, the doors came open again, and a pair of men grabbed me, dragging me into a big white room with padded walls and an observation window where a bunch of serious looking people in labcoats stood around, staring at me.

The put me in a chair, strapping probes to my head.

"We reviewed the tape," Gertie's `Nice Lady' called from the booth. "You appear to have a _glowing personality._ "

I sunk in my chair, staring at the woman in horror.

I thought about things to say, but all of it made me sound like a freak. I bit my tongue.

"Henry had a scratch on his leg, and now it's gone. On the cameras, we saw a _light_ coming from your person. Care to explain?"

"I smuggled a flashlight," I muttered. "As for the cuts, maybe you just gave him _really good bananas._ "

"Nice try. We checked your clothing when you came in. There would have been only one way for you to sneak something like that in here, and we didn't see you walking funny."

 _"You were dragging me the whole time..._ And I... _have an iron constitution."_

Of course they _had_ to check my pockets then.

When a soldier reached into my pocket, the sharp from the badge stuck him in the hand.

The moment he had his hand out, staring at his bloody hand, I punched him in the crotch, ripping the probes off my head.

I wasn't a total idiot. The door _had_ been cracked a little. I actually did make it out into the open.

What I didn't plan for was the guy standing in the hallway. He pinned my arms behind my back, dragging me to the door.

I heard a low rumble, like somebody running a bulldozer, then the power went out.

The guy got distracted, loosening his grip just enough for me to escape his arms.

I ran blindly in the dark, in some random direction.

My chest was glowing. For a moment, I covered my heart, but then let it shine so I could see where I was going.

I was okay until the backup lights came on.

I bumped into the guy that had made all that mess in the break room earlier. "Hey, what's the rush? Got someplace to be?"

"I got lost looking for the bathroom."

The man gave me a skeptical smirk. " _Right._ In that case, I'll show you to the facilities." And he started dragging me back the way I came.

I heard another rumble and the emergency lights flickered out. Dust rained from the ceiling.

I was still glowing, so the man didn't let go. I think his radio had warned him.

The emergency lights returned.

As the man carried me down the hallway a bit, a door swung open, and the "Lonely black lady" from the secretary pool sprayed my captor in the eyes with a can of mace.

Although army guys have eye spraying like that as part of their training (or is it the police?) the lady followed it up by hitting him in sensitive areas and sweeping his legs out from under him.

"C'mon," she hissed to me. "Let's get you out of here."

"Who are you?"

She shushed me, leading Gertie out of a closet.

"You're glowing," my sister said.

"I know. They're not going to let me leave."

The woman glanced back and forth down the hallway. _"We'll just see about that!"_

More rumbling sounds. More dirt came down from the ceiling. "What's that? Is someone bombing us?"

The stranger laughed. "Honey, _that's the fault line_. Didn't you watch the weather report?"

"Why are you helping us?"

"I'm not just a secretary, _I'm a mother_. I see a child in danger, I try to help them. I don't care what color you are, _kids is kids._ "

The woman knew her way around the place. In a few minutes, we neared something that looked like an exit.

It was a long hallway, with rows of doors on both sides, and a fire exit at its end. The woman fished a set of keys out of her pocket, apparently to unlock the alarm box.

Before we could reach the big metal door, I heard guns being cocked and chambered, people shouting "Freeze!"

I looked back and saw we'd been surrounded by army guys, each of them pointing pistols at us.

One of them barked out his orders in clipped militaristic fashion, like he were biting the words out rather than talking. "Make one move toward that exit and _we can and will_ open fire! Do we have an understanding?"

"Sir yes sir!" the woman answered in a shrilly voice, slowly raising her hands in the air.

"Step back from the children and place your hands over your head!"

"Why?" the woman protested. _"So you can kill me?"_

"I repeat! Step back from the children with your hands on your head! I will not ask again!" For some reason, the situation made me think of an angry chihuahua guarding its turf.

I thought they would start shooting, but then the whole building shook, a big jagged fissure cracking the walls and the floor. The red backup lights went out.

The door exploded, and I saw something like lightning flashing through the doorway.

A cold fog rolled in, and the hallway filled with brilliant light.

A robed angelic figure strode into the building.

As it came closer, I saw that it wasn't an angel, it looked like a saucer man from one of those UFO abduction stories. Big head, almond shaped eyes, silver suit.

My chest started glowing as it waved to me. _"They came for me!"_ I cried. " _ET really went home and sent his friends back for me!"_

The alien nodded vigorously, giving frantic waves in the direction of the glowing light. I noticed it adjusted its head a little after each nod.

"Sugar," the woman hissed in my ear. "Let's go while the gettin's good. _Your father's in the Jeep._ "

I stared at her. "What?"

For a moment, I thought I was dreaming this whole thing, you know, because of the highly unusual events being paired with dialog that doesn't make any sense. But then the alien picked up Gertie, making a mad, un-alien dash to the light. My companion grabbed my hand, rushing me after him.

A second later, the guards opened fire.

We burst out into a parking lot illuminated by a bunch of phosphor flares and big battery powered flood lamps, dashing to the side door of an army Jeep.

The alien's head came off, and I saw my brother's curly haired one emerge, scowling at a leg wound that dripped blood on his silver pants. Wincing a little, he popped the door and jumped in with my sister in tow.

 _And there the man was_ , square jawed, thick limbed, a bit paunched around the middle, clad in army fatigues, his black hair tucked under an army cap.

He gave the secretary a wink. "Hey, baby. Nice job back there."

She hurried to the driver's side. _"Tell me that when we're out of this place."_

I gawked at the figure in camo. "Dad?"

The man clicked his teeth at me. "Hey kid." He mussed my hair. "It's been a _long time!_ "


	6. Chapter 6: Dad

Secretary Lady ducked as a bullet pinged off the Jeep's hood. "Steve! Let's go!"

Dad shrugged, giving me an apologetic look. _"You heard the lady._ "

He threw the door open and hoisted me into the cab, into the back. Gunshots shattered one of the headlights, struck against the exterior door paneling.

The woman hopped in, starting the engine.

Ignoring the diagram on the knob, she gave the gear shift a slight cursory wiggle, shoving it into drive and pressing down the pedal. The Jeep made angry grinding sounds in protest, jolting ahead through a cookie cutter military standard army base.

When she shifted gears again, dad grabbed her hand. _"Sweetie..."_

 _"Fine! You drive!"_ Under her breath, she cursed the manual transmission.

She sped around the corner of a barracks, stopping behind a wall. I think dad enjoyed trading seats, because she wore a skirt. Well, until the soldiers shot out the back window and popped the spare tire.

Dad shifted into drive the proper way, speeding around a mess hall as soldiers yelled and fired at us. We kept ducking down.

The Jeep careened toward the front entrance of the complex. I saw a pillbox, guards, and a suspicious looking speed bump.

"Wait," said the woman. "There's a bunch of _road spikes_ up ahead. How are we going to get past `em?"

Dad grinned. "Easy peazy. From what I've heard, _Elliott here made a bunch of bicycles fly up into the air, soared right over a police car_. Isn't that right, Elliott?"

I swallowed. "That wasn't me! That was ET! Why-?"

Dad laughed. "Relax. I was just Joshing you." To Secretary Lady, he said, "Honey, you remember how I told you I mucked up the works-"

As he spoke, Gertie was leaning forward in her seat, holding her hand out in front of her with a determined look on her face. I would have thought it silly except for the fact her hand was glowing.

The Jeep flew up over the bump, and _actually floated in midair for a whole second_.

"Holee shit!" Dad cried. " _I thought that was just a story!_ "

The Jeep crashed down on the pavement a couple feet past the obstacle, jarring everyone in their seats.

The ironic thing was, a set of road spikes popped out of the ground the moment we were rolling away.

"Jesus," Dad muttered.

Secretary Lady crossed her arms. _"I thought you mucked up the works."_

"I did too, babe." Dad mashed the accelerator to the floor. _"I did too."_

The front end of the Jeep collided with the gate, its chain links rumbling noisily beneath our tires.

We rolled down a freeway. Behind us, I could see some army vehicles, but we'd put distance between them and us.

That distance became greater when dad radioed a couple semis on his CB, making them block up both lanes behind us when we passed.

We drove for a few miles in silence.

Dad cocked a thumb at the woman. "Kids, this is Ruby. Ruby, these are my kids."

She leaned over the seat, smiling at us. "Nice to meet you."

"So," Dad said. " _Elliott._ I hear you've been hanging around with little green men."

 _"He's not green,"_ I muttered.

"His chest glows," Ruby said. " _I saw it._ "

"You're not contagious, are you son?"

"I don't think so."

 _"Your sister can lift cars._ I think she got the better end of the deal." He grinned. _"Little Yoda._ "

Dad glanced back at my brother, who was currently bandaging his leg. "Hey, Mike! How you holding up back there?"

Michael looked kind of grim. "The bullet's still in there. I think I should probably get a doctor."

 _"Ixnay on the octor day._ I promise we'll have it yanked out the first stop we get to."

I frowned at Michael. "How did you find dad?"

"He kinda found me."

Dad leaned back in his seat. "I was just buzzing by the old house, you know, _to see how the ex and her kids were doing,_ when I see this big tent over the house, and helicopters, and black vans all over the place. I've pretty much been stalking you kids ever since."

"How's mom?"

"She's out of her mind with worry. Unfortunately, there's also a black van parked out across the street, so you're not going to be able to go home for a very long time."

He turned down a dirt road, into a seedy looking trailer park, rolling to a stop behind an even seedier single wide with rusty siding. "All right, guys. Everybody out."

I scowled in suspicion. "What are we doing _here?_ "

"Swapping cars. We can't be seen driving around a stolen government vehicle, can we?"

He hopped out, unlocked the door of an ugly blue Torino, waved us over. "C'mon, Chinese fire drill! Wanna get out of here before the owner of the trailer gets home!"

We raced over there, Michael limping at the rear behind Gertie.

Not a great car. You had to fold the seat to get in back since it only had two doors. Dad started it up, and we were speeding off again.

My brother took off his spaceman outfit, changing into jeans and an Iron Maiden t-shirt. That was kind of annoying because we didn't have much room to move around, and he elbowed us a couple times.

He winced as he re-wrapped his leg.

"So..."I said. " _Dad._ Is Ruby...your new wife?"

Ruby chuckled. _"Steve...?"_

"It's, uh, a _common law_ type of situation...We'll talk about it later."

 _"Common law!"_ Ruby mocked. "You know damn well-!"

He grabbed her hand. "Looks like we'll have to talk a little, too."

"What's there to talk about? Either you-"

 _"Rubes. Sweetie. I love you._ But we got a couple kids glowing in the dark, and another with a gunshot wound in his leg. This isn't a particularly... _romantic_ situation we're in right now."

She slipped her hand out of his grip. "Fine. _But you owe me._ "

My brother looked pale, and he kept wincing. Without thinking, I reached out and touched his wound. _"Ouch."_

Michael rolled his eyes. "Seriously, Elliott? That's not fun-"

My glowing hand silenced his objection.

I pressed my hand against his bandage.

My brother screwed up his face in pain. "Hey! _That burns!_ Stop that!"

I pulled my hand away.

Michael furrowed his brow, undoing the bandage.

He stared. "Oh my God! The wound's closing up!"

"Tell him to stop," Dad scolded. "If the skin closes up around that bullet, it's going to infect-"

I heard something clunk onto the floor.

"Dad," Michael said. "The bullet's out."

"Huh. _Never mind then_. Guess we won't need those sewing needles and bottles of vodka after all."

"You sure? I mean, _I'm still kind of in pain..._ "

 _"Not until you're twenty one."_

"So why are you glowing?" Dad asked me. "What's with the power? Did you get bit by a space spider, or did your alien probe you?"

I could only shrug. "I don't know. I just...kinda... _thought different_ after spending time with him. Of course, I _did_ kinda touch him."

Gertie grinned, proudly announcing, _"I put ET in a dress!"_

"Hell, Elliott, _maybe you should have given him a manicure! You could have lifted spaceships and shit!"_

"Steve!" Ruby scolded. _"These are kids! Language!"_

"What? Shit's a medical term. _First you say it, then you do it."_

She rolled her eyes.

Dad sighed, silently driving for a minute. "Rubes, I'm sorry about the job...I know you had to go through a lot of racial... _crap_ to get where you were...I know we're not exactly living in the fifties anymore, but I _know_ life had just gotten a lot harder for you, especially with the recession...All I can say is, I'm sorry."

Ruby put her hands on her hips. "Are you kidding? _I just saw a little girl make a car float in the air!"_

"You are _ever_ the found of optimism. Guess that's why I love you so much."

"And you're absolutely certain _my ass_ has nothing to do with it?"

He snickered. " _I wouldn't say that wasn't a factor_ , but it's not _the factor._ "

"I think I'm going to be sick," Michael groaned.

 _"I'm not surprised. You just got shot in the leg...Speaking of which..._ "

He rolled into the parking lot of a cheap motel.

Since we didn't know if we were truly in the clear, dad told us to stay in the car with Ruby, and to drive off if anything went south. Lucky for us, it didn't. A few minutes, and he was unlocking a two bedroom special, waving us in.

We rushed into the room.

The first thing dad did was make Michael lay down on the bed while he checked the wound.

He found nothing but a scar. "Oh my God, Elliott," he muttered. "Whatever it is that you have, we need to bottle it up and sell it to folks."

Dad got up from the bed, resting against a dresser. "I'm going to grab you guys's dinner. You kids need to stay in here until we get you some new clothes. Taco John's okay?"

Ruby checked my jumpsuit size, then my sister's.

"How are you paying for all this?" I asked.

"First National Bank of Couche-Mattress. Open twenty four hours, no minimum deposit."

"I have no interest in where this joke is going," Ruby muttered.

Dad snapped a finger at her. " _Interest free banking!_ "

"Could you get me a dessert pizza?" Mike muttered.

 _"One dessert pizza."_

"Can I get one too?" Gertie asked.

Dad clicked his teeth at her. " _Only if you can make it fly out of the restaurant._ " He chuckled and rubbed her hair. _"Sugar, you can get anything you want._ "

Both he and Ruby stepped outside for a moment.

I peered around the corner, to tell them I didn't want tater tots, but they were making out.

My presence did not go unnoticed, nor did my staring, for when they pulled apart, dad asked, "You're not prejudiced, are you son?"

I shook my head. Honestly, I was thinking more about mom, and what she thought about it.

"I think he just ain't seen that many black folks. _He's been out in the suburb..."_

Dad snickered, sliding one hand around her hip. _"Poor kid."_

"Child, you don't know cooking until you've tried a _black woman's_ cooking!"

Dad grinned and slapped his paunch. _"She ain't lyin'!_ We're going to be spending some time together. _Who knows, maybe you'll get to find out!"_

He glanced down at Ruby's outfit. "Maybe you should stay here too. You're still in uniform."

"What about you?"

"Got a change of clothes in the trunk."

 _"That's a handy place for it."_

"Smartass."

"Shoot. They probably have my place on lockdown by now, don't they?"

 _"Probably."_ He paused. "Hey, come to think of it, I think _I_ do _still have your Oakland A's tee and a pair of hot shorts back there..."_

"Why didn't you give `em back? _Plannin' to try them on?"_

"No ma'am! Just like to keep your memory fresh in my mind."

 _"You be sniffin' them, huh?"_

They both laughed.

Dad changed into some street clothes he had in the trunk, a faded red 49ers shirt ( _"Son, you can learn a lot about life from O.J. Simpson"_ ) and Jordaches with oil spots along the legs. He didn't have the Oakland shirt he thought he had, so Ruby got an Allied Chemical shirt instead. The white hot shorts were barely decent, but it's all he had in the trunk.

Dad drove off, and we hid in the motel room.

Nothing about us on the news. People in some foreign country were throwing rocks and fire bombs again, and then there was some boring thing with President Reagan.

"I wanna watch Scooby Doo," said Gertie.

My brother sat next to the window, peering through the venetian blinds. "We gotta keep it on this channel to make sure we're not on any news reports."

She pouted. "You're just saying that because you want to watch Knight Rider."

"What's wrong with Knight Rider?"

He suddenly frowned, waving us back. _"Guys! Hide!_ "

I crawled under the bed with Gertie, watching with anxious dread as Ruby joined my brother at the blinds.

"What do you see out there?"

"I don't know," Michael muttered. "It's a black van."

Ruby stared out for a moment, then let the slats drop. "It's just pest control. See those cans they're carrying around?"

Michael furrowed his brow. _"So why do they have Geiger counters?_ "

Ruby cracked the blinds again, took one glance out, closed them hastily. _"Shit!"_

The two retreated from the window, pressing their backs to the wall.


	7. Chapter 7: Bedbugs

Ruby cracked the blinds again. "Children, hide in the bathroom. I got an idea."

We did what we were told, Michael locking the door behind us.

A moment later, the `exterminators' came stomping around in our hotel room.

"Oh thank God!" I heard Ruby saying. "This place is just _crawling_ with bedbugs. I turned over that picture on the wall, and it's like they're having a party. And don't get me started on the duvet and the closet."

More stomping. I heard the oil can clicking of one of those manual pump sprayer things. "Anything in the bathroom?" a man asked.

"Haven't really checked in there, but _you know_ how those things hate the light."

The knob turned and clanked as the man tried to enter.

Ruby laughed. "Oh right. Sorry. My boyfriend's in there. _Poor baby got the squirts_. Swears it's from my cooking, _but I know that can't be it._ "

Mike let out a dramatic groan, squeezing a large shampoo bottle into the commode. The bottle, near empty, _did_ kind of sound like diarrhea. Me and Gertie, hiding inside the bathtub, suppressed giggles.

"You got some Pepto?" Mike called.

"Hold on, let me check..."

"Your boyfriend sounds _young_ ," said the man outside the door.

"What can I say? _I likes `em young._..You know it's good you're spraying for cockroaches too, `cuz I saw a couple crawling around the set."

"Ma'am, we're spraying for bedbugs."

"Then how come you're not turning over the bed? I _know_ how these things work! Are you going to do it right, or do I need to go complain at the front office?"

I heard the bed banging on its side. "Ma'am, I'm going to need you to clear out of here for awhile. _You and your boyfriend._ "

She knocked on the door. _"Tom, you done in there?_ "

Mike continued making noise. "I don't think so! Where's the pink stuff?"

"Sorry, baby. Fresh out. Need to go to the store." To the man, he said, "Can he just... _stay in there awhile and hold his breath when he comes out?_ I don't think he's in a condition to move right now, _unless you want to do his laundry..._ "

"Ma'am, that's fine. _We'll come back_. We, uh, need to get some chemicals from the main warehouse anyway...You haven't seen a couple small kids around here lately, have you? A boy and a girl? Gray uniforms?"

 _"You talking about prep school uniforms or what?"_

"They're kind of prison jumpsuits. They broke out of juvie. The boy's older, brown haired, got a little sister in pigtails. You'd know if you saw them. In fact, here's their picture."

"So they got pest control searching for missing children now? What kind of operation you running?"

"Ma'am, _we serve the community_. Anyways, I hear they've been kidnapped by a stocky white guy and a black woman. They might have an older boy with them."

"Could you _describe_ the black woman for me? _`Cuz that could be anyone on the entire east side."_

"I'm sorry. We have pictures, but they're back at the main office. The woman was a secretary for the Department of Defense. She may be dressed in uniform."

 _"A black woman_... _in the DOD. Now_ there's _something you don't see every day!"_

"I'm sorry ma'am. Not meaning to be insensitive or anything. If you see them or hear anything, could you give us a ring? We'd really appreciate it. There's a phone number on the back."

 _"I'll definitely keep an eye out."_

The men stomped out. I heard the hotel door clicking shut, then a long silence.

"I'm glad that's over," said Michael. "'m out of dad's shampoo."

"Is it safe to come out now?" Gertie asked.

A moment later, it was like was having an epileptic fit. My eyes rolled backwards in my head as I convulsed in the tub.

"Brother?" Gertie cried.

Mike grabbed me. "Elliott! Snap out of it!"

And then it was like we weren't in the hotel anymore. We were on ET's ship, all three of us standing in the lower level, gawking at what we saw.

ET hadn't moved from the plant...couch... _thing_. He appeared to be resting, though, his debriefing ending some time ago.

"Is ET dead?" Gertie asked.

"I don't think so," my older brother replied. "I see his chest moving."

The fronds of that tree thing were growing into his arms and upper body, but he smiled when he saw us. "Mich-ael. Ger-tie. Ell-i-ott."

"We're safe, ET," I said. "For the time being. Are you okay?"

ET nodded. _"Good."_

Gertie reached for him, but it only made the vision fade in places like a shimmering mist.

"Your power is fading," ET said. "But will always be here..." He pointed to his head.

His finger glowed as it pointed in my direction.

I saw a flash of something, an electronics diagram. For some reason, it made sense to me. I felt I could build _it_ , whatever _it_ was.

 _"Find...me."_

I heard hotel beds banging down, then a knock. "Kids, you in there?...Food's getting cold!"

Our shared vision disappeared, and we were back in the bathroom. All three of our bodies glowed, but the light dimmed as we regained our bearings. Gertie and I had to wipe blood away from our noses.

"Yeah, dad!" Michael called back. "Just a minute!"

We came out to find taco meals and bags from the thrift store awaiting us on the beds.

"Hope this stuff fits," dad said. "Kinda picked it out at random. Had to guess on the sizes."

"Are the exterminators gone?" I asked.

Ruby nodded. "They sped off the moment they saw me come back with a pink bottle."

Dad chuckled. "You always _did_ have a flair for the dramatic."

 _"Your son helped."_

 _"You're out of shampoo,"_ Michael said.

We ate our dinner, silently watching Knight Rider for a few moments.

"Why aren't you with mommy?" Gertie asked dad.

The man sighed, sat next to my sister, rubbed her on the head. "Your mom and I never got along because I'm a Catholic and your mom's a Jew. It was kind of like oil and water."

 _"Holy water,"_ said Ruby.

"Yeah, anyways, that was only the tip of the iceberg. Admittedly I'm not a great Catholic, being that I'm living in sin and all, but that's beside the point. We didn't get along. That's all. And that bank book (whew!) never could catch all those random checks she kept writing until we got in the red..."

"It wasn't because you didn't want to see us?"

"You kidding? I've been missing you every... _dang_ day!" He gave his girlfriend a sideways glance. "Hey, I'm going to talk with Rubes for a bit. _Behave_ , okay?"

Gertie nodded.

"That's a good girl."

Ruby and Dad stepped out. I spied on them from the window.

"All right," I heard Ruby saying. "We got a free moment. It's quiet, we're alone, explain to me why we don't marry."

Dad sighed. "Look, uh, I got _alimony_ and _child support, which, honestly is going to pose an interesting-"_

"Don't care. Name another reason."

"Hey," he stammered. "Say, for example, that you didn't-"

 _"You think I'll divorce you and leave you with two debts?_ _Is that it?"_

"Uh, in not so many words?"

 _"Steve, baby. I love you."_

"I know, but this ain't my first rodeo."

"Elliott," Gertie called from a spot in front of the bed. "Sit on the floor with me. I want to try something."

I sat Indian style in front of her.

Gertie grabbed my hands. "Close your eyes."

I did.

I saw a flash, then that same circuit board thing I saw before.

"Do you see it?"

The more I thought about it, the more the idea solidified in my head. "Yeah. I think I know how to _build it._ "

I got up from the floor, grabbed a screwdriver I'd spotted while hiding under the bed, and, starting with the antenna screws, I dismantled the TV, piece by piece.

I had an idea where all the components and circuits should go. It seemed easy as hooking up a VIC-20.

"Hey!" Michael protested. "You can't do that! What if someone-"

"I know how to put it back together," I said, not believing the words coming from my own mouth.

Michael, who had been with ET and everything, just stared at me, wide eyed. "Okay, so what are you doing?"

"Dunno. I guess we'll find out when I'm done."

Dad had brought along a dufflebag full of interesting tools, I guess for assisting our rescue. Among the pliers, wrenches and associated hardware, I found a calculator and an analog multimeter. It seemed a good idea to take the things apart for use in this... _thing_ I was putting together.

The door swung open, and dad stepped in, hand in hand with Ruby. I spotted a ring. "Kids, I have an announcement to make-" He frowned when he saw the mess. "Hey! We're going to have to pay for that!"

He scowled. _"Is that my calculator?"_

I'd just created a rough version of a computer, complete with monitor, keyboard (the calculator), even something weird that went into the phone, maybe to call another computer, plus a parabolic reflector piece I'd built from a ceiling light cover and a flashlight.

"Son, I don't know what you're doing with all this stuff, but I hope you can put it all back or there's going to be a problem."

I opened my mouth to say something, but then my improvised computer flickered into action, large block letters on the TV screen spelling out the word ELLIOTT.

"That's cute," said dad. "Maybe we can find you a job. Now put that stuff back."

That's when two more words appeared:

PLEASE REPLY.

"It's ET!" Gertie shouted. "He's talking to us!"


	8. Chapter 8: Sidell

A calculator doesn't give you much in the way of a keyboard. When you turn it upside down, you only get part of the alphabet. I would have used the telephone instead, but it was one of those rotary dial things.

For this reason, the best response I could give to ET was 01134, or HELLO. Michael wanted to send 5318008, but I thought ET would be confused enough by my first message. No need to throw a dirty joke into the mix.

ET took a long time to reply to us. I thought for a moment he didn't understand, but then this message appeared on the TV:

111, 1, 1011, 1011, 000=HELLO

8,5,12,12,15=HELLO

"Looks like Morse code and alphabet cipher," Dad said. "Like on a decoder ring."

"Just pick one," Michael suggested.

Alphabet cipher was shorter, so I used it to spell out "ETISTHATREALLYYOU".

I don't know if it took a long time to get a signal out to space like that, or if he got confused by me not being able to put spaces between words, but the pause I got in response made me wonder if the message got sent at all, or if I should have picked something other than the equals button for the enter key.

The TV screen filled up with incomprehensible symbols.

I typed, " . " and got another long pause.

Dad frowned at the phone cable. "Are you making calls with this thing?"

I could tell he was worried about the room service charges. "No, it's just a safer source of electricity. I think it does something to the signal."

"What do you mean, _you think_? _You built the damn thing!_ "

"I..."

"Honey," said Ruby. "Have you heard of something called an _Idiot Savant?_ "

He scowled at her. "How dare you! _My son is not an idiot!"_

Ruby stifled a laugh. "I didn't say he was, honey. _I'm just saying that certain people can do brilliant things without understanding what they're doing._ I saw a thing on TV one time where this guy memorized every single postal zip code in the country and could tell you what city it was just by saying the number."

Dad smirked, cooling down a bit. "Sounds like a Mentat."

"A what?"

He chuckled. "It's a thing from _Dune_. _It's a book._ A bunch of guys specialize in being human calculators."

"Sounds like a boring book."

"No, no, _there's giant sandworms in it._ It's cool, kind of like _The Hobbit."_

Ruby crossed her arms. "This some kind of nerd thing?"

Dad gave her a look that said `Yeah? So What?'

"So," Michael muttered. _"You're not just calling some creep with a computer. This message is actually going into space?"_

I nodded. "I think there _might_ be a way to call a radio telescope, but _I'd actually have to find a scientist's phone number, and get him to agree with it..."_

Dad thumbed through the white and yellow pages, set them down a moment later. "I wouldn't know where to begin looking. I'm pretty sure even Carl Sagan's number is unlisted."

"If you're trying to type words," Ruby said. "Why not just use the alphabet on the phone-"

Dad and I interrupted her with _"It's a rotary dial."_

"ET still wouldn't know if I meant D, E, or F," I said. "It's better _this_ way."

I wondered if ET had been using the saw blade and record player to rotary dial his friends in the ship, but having to convert my letters to numbers on a notepad every time I wanted to tell him something made this kind of conversation inconvenient.

Gertie wrinkled her nose. "Something smells like a hot hair drier."

"Hair driers are supposed to be hot," said Michael.

She only frowned.

The screen flared to life again.

I saw, in inch-by-inch pieces, a sort of photograph slowly appear on the TV.

When half of it had filled up the screen, Dad muttered something about a bad aspect ratio.

He must have noticed my confused expression, for then he said, " _It's a photographic term._ I've messed with a few computers before. You have to tell it what size to make the frame or it cuts off everything."

I couldn't make heads or tails of what I was looking at. I just saw something brown in front of something green.

Dad pointed. "See, you can't even tell what that is. It might be your friend ET's butt for all we know."

" ," I typed.

The picture disappeared.

As a secondary, smaller picture began to take shape, the "hair dryer smell" Gertie described became a lot stronger.

And then, without warning, the calculator exploded with a loud sizzling pop and a puff of smoke, the cords I'd plugged into the wall outlet and telephone jack bursting into flame.

Dad swore. "See? I _knew_ this was a bad idea!"

He found a fire extinguisher and put out the fire, but we decided we'd outstayed our welcome.

"We're lucky this place didn't require a credit card," Dad said. "As it stands, we're going to have to pretend everything is fine and leave early. Thank God the smoke detector didn't go off. I would have hated to explain this to management."

 _"You sound like you've had some practice with this kind of thing,_ " Ruby muttered.

"Well, honey, _nobody's perfect._ " He paused. "Hope you're not having second thoughts about the marriage."

She kissed him. _"You're not getting rid of me that easy."_

Dad kissed back, then frowned at the mess. "Ellie, can you, I don't know, _maybe put the TV back together,_ _so that it at least_ looks _like it isn't broken?"_

The cords had, of course, been already been unplugged from the wall. Dad had taken care of that with some insulated electrician's supplies. It seemed Ruby had been at least partly right about me being a Savant, for I found it much more difficult to put the TV back together than take it apart. When I finally had the box screwed shut and looking halfway normal, my hands were bleeding from my fight with the sharp pointy things.

Gertie tried to heal me with ET's power, but it didn't work. We ended up just using some bandages.

We decided to cut the plug off the TV, just to make sure the next guest didn't wind up in the hospital.

We slept a little, but left before dawn. Dad tried to look nonchalant and calm when he went into the office,, but when he came out again, he hurried into the Torino so fast that I wondered if he'd held the place up.

"No, no, I paid him," Dad insisted. "I just don't want to hang around to find out what he says about the damages. In my college days, I started a fire with a hot plate..."

He shook his head, stepping on the gas.

"Where are we going?" Gertie asked.

Dad turned down a highway. "San Francisco. Your brother can potentially make a lot of money if he hooks up with the right company."

Ruby scowled. "Steve, as much as I'd like to see him learning how to work a small business and everything, those agents are going to be searching the whole state for him. I'm not sure it's safe."

Dad sighed. "I guess you're right. If I involve him in a high profile business like that, he won't stay hidden for very long."

 _"High profile?"_ She laughed. " _Please._ Computers are nothing but glorified calculators. What kind of money are you really going to get from them?"

"You'd be surprised, darling. Someday they're going to be _big._ "

"I've heard a lot of those guys start in their garages anyway," Ruby muttered. "Maybe you and Elliott can corner an untapped market somewhere else."

"You know, Rubes? I think you're on to something!... _Of course there's the question of where we'd find the parts..._ "

He signaled for an exit ramp.

"Where are you going now?"

"I've got relatives in the D.C. area. I thought maybe-"

 _"D.C.?_ Are you out of your mind? You'll be within spitting distance of the Pentagon!"

Dad swore under his breath, pulled onto the shoulder. Someone honked at us. "All right, Rubes. Where do _you_ think we should go?"

"I...I don't know, how about Kansas City?"

Dad rubbed his face in frustration. "Why."

"For starters, there isn't a military base for miles, it's got a great jazz community, and you can't beat the barbecue..."

 _"You got family there, don't you?"_

 _"Not close family..."_

Dad groaned.

 _"Did I mention that the Royals are doing really good this year?"_

 _"I'll think about it."_

"Ruby," I said. "Didn't you tell me you had kids?"

She nodded. _"They're with their auntie._ I don't think we're going to be able to see them anytime soon.."

Ruby sobbed a little as she thought about it. "I'm not even going to be able to call them! They could be tapping their phones! Reading their mail!"

"We'll work something out," Dad said, squeezing her hand. "At least _she_ won't accuse you of being a kidnapper."

"But _how_ are we going to get them? Aren't those men going to be watching? If either one of us goes back there, we might end up in prison!"

 _"We'll figure something out."_ He sighed. "But first..."

Dad shifted into drive.

We went on a long, meandering road trip, designed to lose anyone intending to track us. For example, we stopped at The Winchester Mystery House, a wax museum in Las Vegas, a ghost town in Grafton Uta, the hotel from _The Shining_ , Mushroom Rock State Park.

The Torino broke down five times along the way, but Mike and Dad knew how to do some temporary fixes to keep it going. We only had it in the shop once.

The Torino ended up rolling into the obscure little town of Sidell, Missouri.

With its incredibly steep hills, the place reminded me of San Francisco, but you had to cross narrow bridges to get into town, and its biggest businesses appeared to be Sidell Cellars Winery, the Tyson Chicken plant, and a toolbox company.

"What are we doing here?" Ruby asked. "Winery tours?"

"This," Dad said as he pulled into one of the town's two filling stations. "This is our new home."

"You're kidding."

"Look. I'm getting some phony ID's made, and the last thing I want is some big city police department picking apart our documents. If the local sheriff finds out they're fake, big deal. It'll be a lot easier to pull up stakes and move from here than Saint Louis or Kansas City."

"Yeah? Well by that same token, _everybody knows everybody_."

"Would you rather face a small army of enemies that you know, or an army of a thousand people you don't?"

All the black people seemed to be living across the railroad tracks, where the housing was cheaper. Ruby talked about buying a place there, but Dad found a secluded cabin in the hills that he liked better.

The Torino gave us so much trouble that Dad towed it into the next county and sold it for scrap. He used the money to help pay for the cabin.

Of course we _had_ to get new names.

Since they'd been taken from dead people, I didn't get a say in what I was to be called. The dead guy's name was Wolfgang Muller, so I was Wolfgang Muller. Michael got the name `Ludwig,' and Gertie became `Anna Maria.' It seemed the deceased were fans of Beethoven.

Dad took a job at Tyson. Ruby tried to work at the winery, but she only got in at the tool box company. Even `Ludwig' started doing a part time gig at some old guy's carpentry shop. I tried to make a few computers for Dad to sell, but we both agreed that I needed to study up on electronics to get things past the prototype stage.

Me and `Anna' got enrolled in a new school, some place called Charles M. Jones. They didn't ask for our social security numbers, and nobody had time to do fact checking on our legal documents, so they assigned us lockers and schedules just like anyone else.

It was your ordinary rural middle school. None of the stuff had been updated since 1950, including the amount of African American students. Old raggedy books, mimeograph, some of the antique wall radiators didn't even work. The newest things we had were one of those tape recorder/slide projector things and a Betamax player.

My hobbies didn't exactly make me a popular kid. In between tinkering with electronics and plants around the school, and me suddenly needing glasses after the first week, I got picked on a lot.

One day, as I was putting my things in a locker, this guy named Jimmy Jackson shoved me into the door, spilling my botany books, a potted geranium and Green Lantern comics on the floor.

 _"Whoops!"_ he laughed. _"Sorry, pansy boy! Guess I wasn't watching where I was going!"_

As I bent over to scoop up the dirt from my plant, he kicked the pot out of my hands, smashed my comics with his sneakers until the pages came apart.

He flipped through my electronics book. "Why you reading this crap, Wolfie? Making some kind of potato clock?"

"Some day it's going to get me into space!"

Jimmy laughed. "How's that going to work? _Gonna build a giant rocketship with a zucchini?"_

His buddies chuckled.

"I don't know, but I'm going to figure it out somehow. _And when I do, you're not coming along."_

 _"Oooh!"_ he mocked. " _Gonna fly away without me, huh? I guess them's the breaks!"_

He threw a textbook down the hall. "Go fetch, Wolfie!"

I had a feeling that ET wouldn't have wanted me to fight someone over something so trivial, but I'd had enough. When I saw him grabbing my botany book, I gave him a shove.

He struck me in the face, knocking my glasses sideways.

"What do you have against me?" I cried. _"Your dad's a farmer!"_

"You think I actually want to join the crummy FFA? _You and my old man would get along great together!"_ He slugged me in the stomach.

I guess this kind of explained why he wore a leather jacket and studded wristbands instead of overalls or flannel.

I thought Jimmy was going to pound me to a pulp, but then I heard a female voice shouting, "Hey! Pick on someone your own size!"

With a laugh, the bully turned around.

I saw a small figure do a couple karate moves, and Jimmy ended up groaning on the floor.

I stared at my rescuer, then did a double take when I realized I recognized her. "Jamie? _How-?"_

"Elliott!" she cried, kissing me full on the mouth.


	9. Chapter 9: Little Runaway

It defied explanation. The girl I smooched during science class, all the way over in California, somehow had made her way into this school out in the middle of nowhere.

"Jamie!" I gasped when I finally pried her away from my mouth. "How in the hell did you find me? What are you doing here? _In my school?_ "

She grinned. "A bee forages one to three miles away from a hive, and can find their home from eight miles a way. A dog can smell a mate from three miles away. And salmon, they travel hundreds of miles during their lifetime, to reach the ocean, their home stream, and feeding grounds. I just had this...feeling that you'd be here, so I knew I had to go."

Jimmy groaned and got up. "This isn't over." But he still took his buddies and left.

I stared. "Okay...so you had some kind of telepathic... _thing_. But _my school?_ _Do you live here? Where are your parents?_ "

I swallowed hard. "Wait. Your folks work for the government, don't they? You're trying to take me back to _that place!_ It's the only thing that makes sense!"

She looked genuinely puzzled. "Why would the government be after you? You just...went crazy and freed a bunch of frogs from being dissected. It was brilliant, and then you kissed me. I've never been kissed like that before. Ever." She took a deep breath. _"I ran away from home."_

"But your parents," I insisted. " _They'll be worried._ "

"It's okay. Daddy gets drunk and hits me. I'd rather be here."

"It's not going to work. What if they have a PTA meeting or something?"

"I'll borrow _your dad._ "

"I...don't know if he'll..."

Jamie gripped my hand, pulling me in close. "Elliott, who's ET?"

I paled. "What are you talking about?"

"When I was searching for you, I...had this _feeling_. A word kept popping into my head. ET. ET. ET. Over and over again. I don't know what it meant, but I felt like it had some association with you."

I narrowed my eyes. "This _is_ some kind of trick, isn't it? Who sent you?"

"Nobody!" she cried. "Just my heart."

I swallowed. "He's...my best friend. He's...actually the reason why I did all that weird stuff in science class."

"He's a space man, isn't he? _An alien,_ right?"

"How did you know?"

Jamie shrugged. "I... _just got a flash of something just now._ Maybe it's because we're holding hands."

My cheeks flushed red. "Don't tell anyone, okay?"

"Is that why there were all those black vans? And _that tent thing_ over your house?"

I nodded.

"Guess that explains why you moved and changed your name to Wolfgang." Her mouth hung open in surprise. "Elliott! _You're glowing!_ "

I wiggled free from her grip. "Sorry."

"No! _I love it!_ " she grabbed my hand again.

I pulled myself loose, glancing around to see if I'd been seen... _doing that._ _"Maybe some other time..._ Where are you staying?"

"There's an abandoned factory down the street from your house. I've been sleeping in the manager's office."

"You can't be doing that! You'll get caught!"

"Don't you get it, Elliott? _I love you! I had to see you!"_

"But the police will come looking for you! When they find you, they'll find me!"

 _"I don't know anyone by Elliott at this school,"_ she said in a tone like she'd use with the cops. "I've only been hanging out with this nerdy kid named _Wolfgang. And he wears glasses."_

"So, what, you're just going to squat in there like a hobo and go to school?"

"It's a little dusty, and drafty, but I got some blankets..." With an eager look, she blurted, _"Are you inviting me to stay with you?"_

Now my face felt really hot. "I'd...like to, but I don't know what dad and Ruby would say... _I could bring you food, and more blankets..._ "

"You got a kerosene heater?"

I frowned, unsure how I'd sneak one to her without being noticed. "I'll.. _.see what I can do."_

"By the way, if you mention me to your dad, tell him my name's Lori."

Our cabin was within walking distance of the school, so I always walked Gertie home at the end of the day. The cool fall wind blew open a discarded styrofoam dinner tray on our front lawn, reminding me of an undersea clam.

Gertie ran into the house. Scooby Doo would be on soon.

I found dad outside in the driveway, working on an ugly old Ford F-100.

He rolled out from under the engine on a mechanic's creeper. "Hey kid! How was school?"

"Great," I said. "I... _just met a nice girl_ _today."_

Dad chuckled. "That's good. I was starting to worry about you. _And Gertie. I know the move and everything wasn't easy on you..."_

I reddened. "Where's Ruby?"

"She took a Greyhound back to California, _you know, for the kids._ " He sat up, sighing as he stared at the ground. "Honestly, not the greatest idea. I offered to go in her place, _but she was worried about you guys not having a dad..._ Figure out the computer thing yet?"

I frowned. "Maybe...Dad, would it be okay if I let someone borrow the space heater?"

Dad narrowed his eyes. "Who's asking for it?"

I shrugged. _"A friend from school._ "

To say he looked skeptical would be an understatement. "Son, we're not exactly made of money, and this isn't a charity."

I fumbled for a good cover story. "Look, dad. The, uh, _weather's getting colder, and her furnace just went out._ "

A wry smirk crept up the corner of his mouth. "Did you just say _her?_ "

I reddened a little. "Yeah?"

"This wouldn't be that new _lady friend_ you just described, now, would it?"

"Um," I stammered. "Maybe?"

 _"That's how it always starts."_ He chuckled and put a hand on my shoulder. "Son, let me as you something. Do you think she's really into you, or do you, I don't know, kinda have a gut feeling that she's using you?"

"I think she's definitely into me." My face got a little redder. "I mean, _she kissed me on the mouth._ "

Dad's eyes got real big when he heard that! _"Before or after she asked you for the heater?"_

 _"Before."_ I cleared my throat. "Actually, she wasn't even the one asking at first. I mean, _I offered to give her a few blankets..._ "

He patted my back. "You're a good kid." He paused. "Tell your girlfriend that if _our furnace_ goes out, _or we have a storm, there's going to be a problem._..does this girl have a name?"

"Lori."

 _"Lori!_ Is she nice?"

I opened my mouth to speak, but he just said, "Guess she must be, to give you a sloppy French on the lips, huh?" He gave me a kidding elbow.

I marched into the house.

Dad said our cabin looked like something from a horror movie, something that appealed to his odd sense of humor. Ruby said it just looked like something from an old western. The place was a little drafty, but we had a furnace and a fireplace, so it wasn't too terrible. I'd say _the_ _decor_ was the worst part, a tacky clashing of western motif and seventies art deco. The curtains were a gaudy striped green-brown pattern, our sofas distressed curbature.

Dad had let me set up a science lab in the basement. Every weekend we'd go to the junkyard and the town dump, scavenging for discarded electronics, TV's, toys, electric typewriters, car parts, radios, sometimes a pinball machine, cassette and eight track decks, a broken arcade game...I made a few interesting computer-like things with them, but it wasn't anything I could peddle to a corporation, especially since I kept experimenting with plant power. Dad kept making jokes about potato clocks.

We tried selling stuff to the bank, but they already had IBM business computers, and they said my computer looked to small to store anything on. Since dad attempted the sale while I was at school, he couldn't find the words to properly explain the miniaturization of electronics.

During commercial breaks, and boring all-day news interruptions on TV, Gertie busied herself with the many plants I had potted around the room, talking to them as she watered and pruned and packed in soil. I had only taught her _half_ of what I learned from all those books. _Even dad_ thought her skill went beyond mom's repertoire. It seemed ET had given my sister a green thumb too.

We _did_ have a pretty good mini-greenhouse started, complete with plant lights. Dad made jokes about us being `pod people', especially since we ate salads, but we never had to buy produce.

The heater stood in the corner. A medium sized one that I could, with some difficulty, lift up the stairs, provided I take the triangular fuel tank out first. Dad said you could cook TV dinners on top of the thing, what, with the heat coming off of it. The thought of giving Jamie an improvised stove in addition to heat made me smile.

I had only loaded it on a dolly and gotten it to the stairs when the basement window suddenly popped open, a female figure nosily scattering equipment and sketches all over the place as she landed on my work table. Circuit boards and half finished projects broke on the concrete.

"Jamie?" I gasped.

She hopped to the floor, holding a finger to her lips.

"What are you doing here?" I hissed.

 _"Coming to see you._ What does it look like?"

I picked up my papers and other stuff, straightening up.

"Sorry about the mess...Is that the heater?"

I nodded.

Jamie put her hands on her hips. "Maybe if we sneak it around back, when it's dark or something..."

Gertie gawked at my girlfriend. _"Hey! You're Elliott's classmate!"_

Jamie shushed her, waving her hands, trying to make my sister decrease her volume. _"I grew up here, all right?"_

My sister wrinkled her nose, shaking her head. _"No you didn't! You were in California! You shouldn't lie! It'll make your nose get big!"_

"Please don't tell dad!" I hissed. "He'll think she's a spy or something!"

Gertie looked Jamie in the eyes. " _Are_ you a spy?"

"No."

"Then what are you doing here?" she paused. "And don't lie. Your eyes do funny things when you're about to tell a story. Like right now."

Jamie sighed. "If you tell your dad, I'm going to kill you."

 _"I won't tell a soul. Cross my heart, hope to die."_

"You're... _Jewish."_

My sister didn't get it. "What does that have to do with anything? And how did you know that, anyway?"

I was wondering that, too, but I didn't want to add to the noise level by talking.

"Never mind. Look. I ran away from home, okay? Don't tell."

"Is that why you need a space heater?"

Jamie swallowed, nodding a little. "Don't tell."

"Where are you sleeping? Under a bridge?"

"It's a little better than that."

Gertie sniffed her. _"You don't_ smell _like a hobo."_

My girlfriend rolled her eyes. " _Gee, thanks._ "

"I'm going to play with my dolls," Gertie said, marching upstairs.

Jamie glanced at me with discomfort.

 _"She crossed her heart,"_ I said.

My girlfriend stared at my stuff. "What's all this?"

"I don't know. After I met ET, I started... _thinking differently. Getting ideas._ "

Ever since I'd had those visions of ET with Gertie, I'd been drawing pictures of... _space vehicles,_ astronauts, you know, what a ship might look like if I were to build it, and how it might work on different terrain...and then a few of astronauts encountering ET and Yoda and the Green Guardians. I'd tacked and stapled and taped them up all over the place.

Jamie pulled one off the wall. "I hope you're not trying to build this. Rocket ships aren't supposed to be this round."

 _All_ of my ship designs were somewhat round. " _ET_ made it work. _There's got to be a way."_

"Airplanes were inspired by birds, but they never worked until we made them more airplane shaped." She furrowed her brow. "Are you glowing again?"

I stared at my chest. I really didn't think the glowing could be seen.

"How are you doing that?"

"I don't know. It just happens."

 _"Like when you're around me?"_

"Maybe?"

She giggled. "That's kinda cute."

I showed her a couple computers I'd made.

"You're...really smart."

I blushed. "Thanks."

Jamie handed me an oddly familiar looking walkie-talkie. "I kinda took this from your house. Thought I'd give it back."

I stared. "You went in my house? Why?"

She leaned in close to me. _"Why did you kiss me?"_

My blush deepened. "Uh..."

"I hope you're not going to say it's all because of your alien friend."

"Well," I stammered. " _I guess if you-"_

"This whole time, I've been trying to figure you out. You go from pulling my hair and acting like I was icky to freeing frogs and kissing me. _So I did some investigating._ I've seen your mom at PTA meetings before, so I kinda got into the principal's file cabinet and looked you up...your mom's really friendly."

I swallowed. "How is she?"

Jamie gave me an apologetic look. "She misses you, but she understands why you ran off. Those men with the black vans scare her too."

"Are people still watching the house?"

 _"Kinda._ Your mom says it's not as bad as it used to be."

"Wait. If you went there, wouldn't they be following after you too?"

Jamie rolled her eyes. "Why? _I'm just a dumb kid_. _I didn't even touch your space man._ Unlike you, _curling up next to him in your longjohns..."_

"Wait. She told you about _that?_ "

 _"So maybe I exaggerated a little about my telepathic abilities._ I still wouldn't have gotten here without your alien friend."

"Did you...find anything else in my room?"

"Your mom said those men pretty much ransacked you guys's rooms, so there was mostly a bunch of _toys, and clothes and mementos_ , you know, because they didn't have any use for them and gave them back. Of course, _they didn't check the garage very well._

 _"_ She found a _funny notebook_ in a Monopoly box buried under your dad's clothes. There's also some weird stuff scribbled all over one of your brother's Dungeons and Dragons manual."

I stared. "What did you do with them?"

"They're in a backpack at my place. Along with one of Gertie's dolls and a bear."

 _"She was actually okay_ with you taking the stuff?"

Jamie looked sheepish. _"I kinda told her I knew where you were...and was helping you hide."_

"So where did you tell her I was?"

 _"In the attic of my old house._ It's good I did, too, because a day later, your guys were swarming around the place, driving the new owners crazy."

"What about the backpack? Wouldn't they think it weird to see you walking out with one full of stuff?"

 _"My pink backpack?_ I got weirder looks from my teachers. _I told them I left all my books at my boyfriend's house._ "

"Elliott?" Dad called from the top of the stairs. "Who are you talking to down there?"

"Shit!" Jamie cried, ducking under a work table.

"... _Myself!_ " I said. 'I'm... _thinking out loud."_

As he marched down the stairs, Jamie pulled a trash can and a chair around herself for concealment.

Dad frowned at the heater. _"Need help with that?"_

I slowly nodded.

Jamie sneezed.

Dad glanced up, trying to see what had caused the noise. "You hear something?"

I tried to look puzzled. "I think it's just a squirrel."

He squinted. "You left the window open."

 _"It was hot."_

He still looked suspicious. "That squirrel sounded pretty close. You might want to close it a little better or we'll have to buy glue traps."

I paled when he picked up the walkie talkie. "Where'd you get this?"

"Jamie," I blurted. "I mean, _Lori_. She, uh, thought I'd like them."

Dad turned the toy over. "This looks like the one I got you for _Hannuk-Christmas._ "

That was dad's little joke. We celebrated Hannukah, but his best gifts came around the 25th...And the ones for the other days tended to have a suspiciously Christian flavor to them. Green and red gifts or packaging. `Hannukah deer.' He made figgy pudding one year. One time, he and mom even had an argument about ham.

"It's a common brand," I said.

His thumb rubbed the scratches along the plastic, his face still reflecting suspicion.

Dad sighed, set the radio down so he could grab the heater. "Let's get this thing upstairs, shall we?" He motioned for me to get the reservoir.

Dad set the heater by his truck, groaned in frustration. "Damn, forgot about the alternator. Your brother's supposed to be bringing it by when he gets off work."

"That's okay," I said. "I'll use my Radio Flyer."

The moment I came out of the house with the wagon, Jamie came walking up the front yard like she'd just gotten there.

She waved to me and dad. "Hey Wolfgang...Hi, Mr. _Mueller._ "

Dad grinned. "So. _You're the famous Lori I keep hearing about._ "

Jamie looked bashful. "I hope you've heard good things."

He nodded. "Got furnace trouble, huh? How long you think it'll take before you get it fixed?"

"I don't know. _Might be awhile_. They're saying we might need to get the whole thing replaced. We're trying to save up."

 _"I'd say so. Those things can get pretty pricey."_ He kept scrunching up his face, staring at her. "Say, _haven't I seen you around somewhere before?_ "

 _"I go to his school._ You probably saw me around there."

Dad rubbed his face, looking like he'd smelled a fart. "I don't know. _It seems like I've seen you somewhere else..._ "

It was hard to guess how much dad remembered about the girl. I mean, _after the divorce..._

"I hang around stores a lot."

"Maybe it was the hardware store," I suggested.

Dad gave another piercing look, then muttered, "We _do_ go there a lot..."

Jamie sneezed again.

"Wow. _Sounds like you're getting a cold._ Maybe you _do_ need that heater." He helped me load the wagon.

I offered the handle to Jamie, but she said, "Walk with me. I want you to...meet my parents."

Dad rolled his eyes. "Think you'll be back for dinner?"

I fumbled for words, but Jamie gave him a nod. "What are you having?"

"Probably TV dinners, if that's okay."

She looked excited. "Sounds wonderful!"

"Poor girl," Dad muttered to me. _"When did she last eat?"_

When I shrugged, dad gave me a wink and rubbed my shoulder, as if to say, `You're a chip off the old block'.

The old factory building stood a block down from my cabin, at the bottom of a steep hill. A yellow thing with dirty windows and big garage doors that occupied most of the block. Debris lay scattered on its grounds.

 _"I thought you wanted to until it gets dark,"_ I muttered as we drew closer to it.

She sighed. "Yeah, but _your dad._..And we can't exactly leave it outside. Someone might steal it."

We didn't so much roll the wagon down the street as slow its descent past the building. A couple kids in one of the nearby houses stared at us, so we went around the corner.

The sign for the business had been removed from above the door, leaving me guessing what sort of factory the place had been.

We waited for the street to be clear of observant drivers (the area was secluded enough - we didn't have to wait long) but I noticed a fat old lady staring at us as we snuck the Flyer around the side of the building. We ended up pretend carrying it to the back yard of a nearby house. A chihuahua barked at us from the window above us.

The woman scowled and swept her front porch.

We watched the woman from behind a shrub, breathing a sigh of relief when she at last went back inside her house.

The dog kept barking.

"C'mon," Jamie whispered. "Let's go."

My friend had the back door of the place propped open with a rock. She held it open as I wheeled the Flyer inside.

The place appeared to have been a small scale printing factory, perhaps for one of the unions. Dust gathered on the big roller machines, the forklift, the typesetting equipment.

Jamie switched on a flashlight, leading me up a metal staircase to a room with a desk and rusty old file cabinets. I saw a sleeping bag, a wind-up alarm clock, canned food, and some clothing on the floor. "You think we can get it up here?"

"I think I saw a ramp...how do you bathe? Or wash your clothes?"

 _"Next door._ The guy works nights at the gas station. I sneak in when he's leaving for work, _or at work._ "

"Guess that explains the clock."

I helped her with the heater.

Jamie unzipped her pink bag, dug out my spiral notebook and a dungeon master campaign manual belonging to Billy, Michael's friend. The latter item had a bunch of blank pages, so you could fill in your own stuff for the game, but someone had filled it up for me. I stared at the writing.

 _"Make any sense to you?"_

"No..." I muttered, but then something clicked in my head, like I had just activated the part of my brain that spoke Spanish, and I had to think in Spanish terms in order to understand everything. _That wasn't the language I was reading, of course._ "Wait. I think...this has something to do with energy."

Jamie had a puzzled dog look on her face. "What?"

"Energy," I repeated. "It tells me how to make a liquid that provides electricity like a car battery, except better."

Her ears actually seemed to go up like a confused dog. "The only word I understood out of all that noise was `car battery.'"

"C'mon," I groaned. _"Don't tell me you don't know what electricity is!"_

 _"Finally you're speaking English! What was that stuff before? Swahili?_ "

I paled. _"I literally wasn't speaking English?"_

She shook her head. " _Are you really all right?"_

I frowned, remembering how strangely my lips had been moving a minute ago. "Yeah. I...just...think I know how to read this stuff now."

 _"_ Maybe your spaceman messed you up more than you know."

I just sighed, glancing at the heater. "Let me know if you run out of fuel."

She slung her bag over her shoulder. "Let's go."

"Wait," I said. "Where's the dolls and the bear you were talking about?"

Jamie patted the bag. "Why?"

"Maybe we should leave that stuff here for the time being. Dad already acted kind of sketchy when he saw my walkie talkies."

She frowned. _"Guess you got a point."_

He still got sketchy.

"What's that you got there?" Dad asked when I stepped through the door to our cabin. He'd spotted the book.

"Uh...She was just telling me how she liked D&D. I thought we might play sometime."

He looked Jamie in the eyes. "Your folks okay with you being here?"

"Yeah. They always say I should get out more often."

The dinner table stood right next to the living room couch, and a log wall. A stuffed deer head looked impassively down on us with its glass eyes as we ate.

My sliced turkey TV dinner was like lunchmeat with soggy globs of croutons floating in grease. I took it because I wanted our guest to have the first pick. I resolved to have real food in my spaceship, if I ever got it off the ground.

"So," Dad said to my girlfriend. " _Lori._ Tell me about yourself."

"Not much to say, really. I've lived here...awhile. Dad works at the car dealership. Mom runs the bar."

Dad propped his elbow on the table, fingering his chin. he looked like he was going to say something, but Jamie blurted, "I'm in El, _Wolfgang's_ biology class. _And_ home room."

I eyed Gertie nervously, but she kept her mouth busy with food.

Dad glanced at her. "You're unusually quiet tonight, tyke. Anything on your mind?"

"Is it a sin to lie if it helps people?"

He gave me and Jamie glances like he suspected something amiss, but then he rubbed her head. "Still worried about _that_ , are you?"

Dad shot Jamie an apologetic glance. " _We're under the witness protection program._ _I saw a guy get killed._ _Bad shit,_ excuse my language. Can't tell our real identities or the _mob'll_ come after us."

I and Jamie exchanged uncomfortable glances.

"What did he tell you? _Something outlandish about a UFO?_ "

Jamie suppressed a giggle. _"Something like that."_ She elbowed me.

Gertie looked troubled, but just stuffed a forkful of peas into her mouth.

Michael opened the front door. "Dad, I got the alternator."

He frowned when he noticed our guest. "Hey, isn't that-"

When dad looked his way, I mouthed the word no, shaking my head.

"Did I mention my uncle works at the hardware store?" Jamie exclaimed.

Gertie gave my brother a thumbs up when dad wasn't looking.

Michael picked up the D&D manual. "Hey, this looks like Billy's-!"

I glanced at him nervously, again shaking my head.

My brother thumbed through it a moment, frowned, set it down. _"Popular book."_

Jamie grabbed a couple rolls, looked at the clock. "I should get home. _My parents..._ "

Dad nodded. "Nice to meet you. Any friend of El, little _Wolfgang_ , is a friend of mine."

"Want me to walk you home?" I offered.

"Thanks. I'm okay. See you at school tomorrow. Thank you for the heater, Mr. Mueller. _And_ dinner."

Greg stared. _"You gave her a heater?"_

"Her furnace broke," Dad said. "She's just borrowing it for a few days."

I followed Jamie out to the porch.

She shut the door, once again kissing me on the mouth.

"You're glowing again," she said when she pulled away.

I gawked at her. "You are too."

I wasn't joking, either. I could see a red glow spreading beneath her shirt, like someone had flicked on a light bulb in her rib cage.

Her mouth hung upon in shock. I saw the light fading. "It's not like a disease or anything, is it?"

"I don't know. So far it seems to be a nice disease. I mean, _I feel pretty good..._ '

She grinned. "So do I."

As she was leaving, she held out one of my walkies, wordlessly turning the volume knob to the `ON' position before dropping it in her backpack.

The moment I stepped into the house, I found Michael and dad standing in front of them, expectant looks on their faces.

"Okay," Dad said. _"What did you tell her?"_

I swallowed. At present, being punished for blabbing about ET seemed to be a better alternative to pulling up stakes on account of a little runaway girl. "I... _told her everything._ But she's not going to tell anyone. We pinky swore."

"You... _pinky swore,_ " Dad groaned. "Great. _Who else did you tell?_ "

I flushed hot with shame, both at lying, and the crime itself. "Nobody. Just her."

He sighed, glancing at Michael for a second opinion.

"She's just a little kid. What harm can she really do?"

"Michael, _little kids have carried live grenades up to American GI's in Vietnam._ How do we know she's not somebody's little spy? _They_ are _targeting a kid..._ "

"So, what, we're just going to move out of town on account of one kid? Elliott's been a loner ever since we moved into this dump. It wouldn't hurt for him to have a few friends, especially ones he can trust. _I'm just saying..._ "

 _"Lord, give me strength..."_ Dad took a deep breath, rubbed his face. "Okay. We'll stick it out for the time being. But if I catch someone else, anyone else, sticking their nose in where it doesn't belong, we're getting out of Dodge, capische?"

I nodded. "Yes sir."

I went to my bedroom, switched on the walkie. I only heard static (I figured it was out of range anyway), but I decided I needed something soothing to calm my guilt ridden mind into sleep. I set it on the dresser and shut off the light.

The first thing I dreamed about was dad finding out my secret. He yelled at me, took Jamie to the police station to notify the parents, then we started packing again.

I woke, watched _The War of the Worlds_ on my little black and white TV, you know, the late night monster show. I kept the lights off, to avoid disturbing the others.

It was storming outside, raining to beat the band. I worried about Jamie in that big cold drafty building, hoped the heater would be enough.

"Elliott, are you awake?" I heard a voice say on the walkie.

I clicked a button. "Yeah. You can't sleep either?"

"No. Whatcha doing?"

"Oh, just watching TV."

"Can you hold the thing up to the TV so I can listen?"

"If I do that, I won't be able to talk."

"That's okay. It's probably better that way anyway."

"You warm?"

"Yeah."

"How's the heater?"

"It's great. Glad I'm not outside. Thanks again."

I used a few rubber bands to hold the button down, pressing the walkie to the TV's speaker.

I started nodding off about halfway in, so I spoke up again. "I'm going to shut this off, all right?"

"Sure. Good night Elliott, I mean, _Wolfie._ I love you."

I stared at my radio receiver. Did she really just say that to me?

"Elliott?"

I gulped. Apparently she wanted me to say something back. "I...I love you too."

"Is your chest glowing? Mine's shining pretty bright. It makes the place look kind of spooky."

I was lighting up the room too. "Yeah."

 _"Oooh! The Martians are coming! Look at my hand!"_

I chuckled.

"It's not going to keep glowing while I'm at school, is it?"

"I don't know. I hope not. _Those guys might come after you._ "

"Maybe I could staple a magazine or something to my shirt."

"You'll look weird."

"Can't look any weirder than a glowing chest."

I sighed. "Guess you're right. Anyways, pleasant dreams."

I don't know if what I dreamed was actually pleasant, but it _was_ highly unusual and life changing.

I flew over an immense circuit board, zooming in between its chips and capacitors like an X-Wing on the Death Star.

I could see the board from every angle, turn it three hundred sixty degrees like a model. I saw the pattern, knew how to put it together. Mostly.

My eyes snapped open, and the glowing of my chest intensified to the brilliance of a desk lamp. Drenched in sweat, I sat up, fumbling for a notebook.

I'd filled every page of the front half with sketches before the strange muse left me, and I sat staring at my notes.

A moment later, my bedroom window slid open with a loud hiss, and Jamie came climbing in, shrugging a damp rain poncho onto the floor.

She stared at my notebook. _"You dreamed about it too?"_


	10. Chapter 10: Dangerous Equations

I gawked at Jamie. She was glowing, and so was I.

The thing I dreamed about seemed very important, and somehow connected to ET on a deep, complicated level. If she _knew something_ , if ET _chose her to_ _come along_ whenever we found a way to meet him, it changed everything.

"You..." I stammered. "What did _you_ dream about?"

She sat down on my bed, flipping through my notebook. " _A circuit thingy. Like someone took that cover thing off a computer._ I was flying through it, and somehow I could tell what things were. Don't ask me how, but..."

She dug a stack of paper out of her shirt, diagrams, symbols and equations drawn in pencil and ink, half smudged by rain. "Just like any dream, it's perfectly clear and you know exactly what it all is right when you wake up and scribble everything down." She rubbed her forehead. "Of course, right now it's like I just had a cup of coffee or something. It's... _kinda confusing._ "

"I didn't know you drank coffee," I muttered.

"I don't. _Usually._ Sometimes I have some with lots of cream and sugar. Anyways, that's beside the point. Do you know what all this is?"

I shrugged, staring at the papers. We weren't glowing so much now, so I resorted to reading with a flashlight.

These were _plans_ for something. Plans for what, exactly, I couldn't tell, but if ET really wanted us to come to him, I figured it was going to be a lot more complicated than sprinkling a bunch of pixie dust and thinking happy thoughts. A hundred plus pages of notebook paper complicated. After all, ET _did_ say our powers were fading.

"What do you think all this is? Blueprints for some kind of spaceship?"

I shook my head. "I'm not sure. It could be anything. _A landing gear_. _A formula for rocket fuel_...So how did that heater work for you?"

"It's great. Really warm...Could you get me a towel? I'm soaking wet."

I brought her one from the hall closet. She _was_ dripping on the papers. "Did you have matches or a birthday candle or something to light the wick? I know it's kind of tricky if you never-"

Jamie reddened. _"So maybe I just sneaked into your basement and kinda slept there."_ She sneezed. " _By the way,_ y _ou guys should dust more often._ "

I smiled as I watched her dry her hair into a messy frizz. "Guess that explains the great radio reception."

"It _was_ great, wasn't it?"

I gave her a sheepish grin, blushing a little.

"So." She turned a diagram over. " _Nothing at all_ springs to mind when you're looking at this?"

I returned my attention to the paper. It didn't seem to make sense. "I think it's something to do with energy, but something's missing."

Jamie tore a page out of my notebook, holding it up to one of her diagrams. "Maybe it's like a puzzle."

"You...might be right. I guess a lot of computer programs have modules and things that have to fit together just right or they don't work..."

"Can we go downstairs and try typing some of this in?"

"No way! It'll make too much noise! _You're not even supposed to be here!_ " I turned my notepad over, showing her the mess of writing on the reverse side. "By the way, some of these `puzzle pieces' are double sided."

"Oh. Guess we'll have to copy that onto another sheet and see if it fits together."

We transferred the information onto a fresh page.

"Say, hypothetically, that we somehow get this jumbled mess to make sense. Then what? What are you intending to do with it?"

"ET said to come see him. I don't think we're going to get to where he is, until we build this... _whatever it is._ "

"You're trying to make that Christmas tree ornament thing from your drawings, aren't you?"

I didn't deny it. _"Well..."_

She snickered. "I hope it works!"

"Me too."

After working on the papers for several minutes, Jamie sighed in frustration. "Couldn't you just, I don't know, _take the Challenger?_ "

I rolled my eyes. "Even if the government wasn't out to get me, you have to be an _adult_ , and _get in the air force_. And _take a physical exam_ , you know, _to prove that you're a perfect model of fitness._ "

 _"Where's the fun in that?"_

 _"I know, right?"_

"Elliott!" I heard dad calling from outside the door. "Whatcha doing in there?"

"Shit!" Jamie gasped, ducking under the bed.

"Nothing!" I cried. "Uh, just... _reading!_ "

"You _do_ know it's a school night, don't you?"

"Yeah... _Couldn't sleep._ "

 _"It'd help to turn the lights off."_

Jamie sneezed.

"What was that?"

"Nothing," I covered. "I...I think I'm coming down with a cold."

 _"Maybe if you didn't play with the windows so much you wouldn't have a cold. Go to bed!"_

My girlfriend chuckled.

I had to at least _humor_ dad, so I stowed our materials and occupied the bed.

Obviously, there'd be a problem if dad found me sharing a bed with Lori, or even saw her in my room. I compensated by slipping her one of my sleeping bags from the closet and having her sleep under the bed. Not very comfortable or hospitable, I know, but she wasn't supposed to be there.

My plan worked until she had to go to the bathroom.

"Can't you, um, _hold it?_ " I stammered. "Or get a soda bottle or something?"

 _"Elliott..."_ She fell silent for a moment. "No. I really can't. I'm just going to dream about looking for toilets. And I'm not comfortable with _doing that other thing_ while you're in the room."

I rubbed my face in frustration. "It'd almost be safer if you went outside. I mean, what if dad sees you?"

"It's raining. I'm not going to squat out in the yard in the rain. I already risked a cold sneaking into your window."

 _"You slept in an abandoned factory,"_ I pointed out.

She sighed. _"All right, all right!_ "

"Wait. Maybe if we time this just right..."

It wasn't the most elegant plan, but we came to the idea of having Jamie cloak herself in a blanket and carry my walkie-talkie to throw my voice, if needed.

I checked the hallway first, to make sure the coast was clear, then sent her tiptoeing down the way.

I gasped when I saw the bathroom door swing open.

Gertie stepped out, scrunching her face when she noticed the figure huddled in blankets.

She rubbed her eyes, then widened them when her sleepy brain recognized who it was.

Jamie whispered something to her. Gertie covered her mouth, suppressing a giggle.

My sister glanced at me, giving me this look like I were crazy. I only shrugged.

She disappeared into her room.

"That was close!" Jamie radioed to me.

"Yeah," I muttered back. "Hurry up!"

My girlfriend rushed into the bathroom.

I waited impatiently for her to finish her business and get out of there.

The door came back open, and Jamie came creeping up the hallway.

Dad's door suddenly creaked open. _"Elliott?"_

Jamie tried her hardest to keep her face shrouded in cotton fabric, and facing far away from dad. I radioed, _"I had to go, okay?"_

"What's with all the blankets?"

 _"It's drafty in here."_

"Have you been painting your toenails?"

"Actually, Lori..."

Before I could do anything about it, dad's arm shot out, grabbing my girlfriend. The blanket fell to the floor, leaving my girlfriend stupidly holding the walkie-talkie.

Dad chortled through his nose. "I knew those feet looked too pretty to be Elliott, _Wolfgang's_."

"It's not what it looks like, Mr. Mueller!" she said.

Dad glanced over at my blushing face. "It never is." He rolled his eyes. "Let me guess... _homework?_ "

"How did you know?"

A wry smirk crept up his mouth. _"Damn that kid moves fast! Chip off the old block!"_

He grabbed the radio, pushing the button. "Wolfgang, get your butt over here."

I paled, doing what he said.

Dad put a hand on my shoulder. "El, _Wolfgang, I know you're getting older, and your developing hormones and everything..."_

"We didn't do anything," Jamie blurted. "It was just a sleepover."

Dad chortled, shook his head. " _Right. An unauthorized sleepover. On a school night. One you don't want to tell the old man about!_ Believe you me, I've had a few of those quote-unquote _`sleepovers.' Where do you think Michael came from?_ "

"Can I have breakfast?" Jamie blurted.

 _"It's four in the morning."_ Then, noticing Gertie standing in the doorway, Dad rubbed his face. "What do you want to eat."

It was a very awkward meal. For a long time, we just silently stared at each other and ate our oatmeal and pancakes.

"Why were you sleeping under the bed?" Gertie asked my girlfriend.

Dad furrowed his brow. " _Who_ was under the bed?"

"Jamie. I mean, _Lori_. She had a sleeping bag and everything. It didn't look very comfortable."

Dad burst out laughing. "Did he coach you to say that?"

Gertie shook her head. "It's a sin to lie."

I frowned at her. "I had the door shut."

 _"You were sleeping. And there's a crack under the door."_

Dad put his chin in his hand and just stared at my sister. Then he stared at me. _"Son, what's really going on?_ "

I opened my mouth to say something, but Jamie answered first. "I'm homeless."

Dad took a deep breath, let it out. _"Explains a few things,_ I guess. _Like how you eat like you've starved for two weeks..._ So what did you do with the heater?"

"It's safe. I sleep in an abandoned building."

It seemed the smells of food had awakened my brother. He stood beside the table, just staring. "What's _she_ doing here?"

Dad frowned. _"It seems our cabin has become a hotel._ "

Another tense silence.

At last Dad said, "Tell you what, Lori. I'll let you stay in Gertie's room. I mean, _Anna Maria_ 's..."

Gertie looked excited to have a roommate. I noticed her grinning.

"That stuff you told me about your parents, that was crap, wasn't it? _I've been to that bar..._ "

Jamie gave him a bashful nod.

He twisted his lip. "You have us at a _disadvantage_ , miss. _We're not exactly in a position where we can afford to talk to the authorities..."_

 _"I thought you were under witness protection."_

Dad gave her a sheepish grin. "Yeah? Well the people that are after us... _they go way up_. Ever seen _Serpico?_ "

"No. What's that about?"

He shook his head. "Corrupt cops. They flush a guy's head in the toilet. Never mind. The point is, we can't trust the police, so I guess you've got a place to stay until we can figure out what to do with you."

Dad started working on a newspaper crossword.

"Hear anything about Ruby?" I asked.

Dad sighed. "Not since the last one hundred times you asked."

"Who's Ruby?" Jamie said.

 _"My fiancee_. She _just had_ to go back and get her kids."

"What do you think happened?"

"She probably got caught, got taken to a military base or a prison. As we speak, they're probably pumping her for information or something."

 _"And you're not going to rescue her?"_

Dad rolled his eyes. "Look. We were lucky to rescue... _Wolfgang_ from _the cops_ the first time. _His brother got shot in the process._ If I try to rescue Ruby, you kids will either get captured, or you won't have _food_ , or a _roof over your head_. I had to make a judgment call. I'm sure Ruby understands."

Gertie sniffed, wrinkled her nose. "Lori, you need a bath."

 _"From the mouth of babes,"_ Dad joked. "You know where the shower is. Guess you'll have to wear the same clothes until we can get you to the thrift shop."

While she got cleaned up, Dad took me aside, giving me a talk on the birds and the bees that left my ears burning.

The moment Jamie came back from the shower, Gertie asked if she could braid her hair. "Maybe later," she said.

We commenced our short walk to school.

"So," Michael said to my girlfriend. "Now that you're going to be living under our roof, _let's hear some answers_. I know you've been lying, and you're obviously hiding something from dad..."

She reddened. " _I followed you all the way from California, okay?_ I _may have_ run away from home."

My brother grabbed her by the shoulders, glaring at her. "What have you done! They'll be worried sick! The _cops_ will be on us for sure!"

 _"I changed my name."_

"Yeah? But they have _pictures_ of you. They could send them to the _police_ here!"

 _"They probably have pictures of you and Elliott too."_

 _"She's been hanging out with me,"_ I added. "They'll probably want to take _her_ to some military base too."

Michael scowled. _"She could be spying._ "

"She doesn't _seem_ like a spy."

"That only means she might be a good one."

"I'm not a spy," Jamie said. "He's right. If I go back to my folks now, I'll be a hostage, at the very least."

"If those black vans start showing up here, I'll kill you."

Jamie swallowed, giving him a grave nod.

 _"ET sent her here,"_ Gertie said. _"She_ told _me."_

 _"Welcome to the family,"_ Michael groaned.

We dropped Gertie off at the grade school, went next door to the upper grade building.

"So when do you think we can give Gertie her stuff back?" Jamie asked me.

"I don't know. If Dad sees anything, he's going to get upset."

"Hey," said Michael. "How did you enroll here anyway?"

Jamie answered, " _I didn't. I snuck in._ "

My brother furrowed his brow. " _And nobody said anything?_ "

"I hid in the attic store room yesterday. Read _The Neverending Story_."

I stared.

 _"It's a book. By Michael Ende._ Kind of ironic, really. I got the idea for my hiding spot from the book."

"That will only work so long," my brother said. "What if they catch you in the hall?"

"I actually _did_ get caught yesterday. Some guy asked what I was doing without a hall pass, and I said going to detention, I acted up in Mrs. South's class...He didn't even check to see if I went to the right room."

"I'm guessing you found a school roster."

She nodded. " _And I overheard some things._ "

Michael paused and thought a moment. "Tell you what. I'll take you to the principal's office, tell Mr. Hiskey that you're my cousin, and that there's been a death in the family, so you've come to live with us. I'll tell him the paperwork will get taken care of later."

"Sounds good," I said. Of course, I reflected how weird it would look to the school, you know, _Frenching my cousin and all._ "Can I come along?"

He shook his head. "I got this. You just go to class. It'll look more official."

"Oh..kay," I stammered.

"Someone may have seen us kissing," Jamie pointed out. "What if somebody says something?"

Mike rolled his eyes, looking rather disgusted. "We're close to The Ozarks. I don't think they'll care that much."

 _"Kissin' cousins,_ " Jamie said with a hillbilly accent.

I laughed.

The bell rang, compelling me to leave. My `cousin' blew me a kiss. Life was going to get awkward fast.

Halfway down the hall, Jimmy shoved me up against a locker. "Not so tough when _girlfriend's_ not around, are you?"

I got beat up.

I know, I'd like to tell you something cool like how I used Kung Fu and kicked his butt, but this isn't that kind of story.

Yeah, yeah, I may have attacked an army guy at that base, but, well, _that guy_ was only trying to grab me, not make mincemeat out of me.

I tried to fight back, but it didn't work. He just knocked my glasses off, popped me in the face, and shoved me to the floor.

I tried to get away, but he just pounded me until I cried. Mr. Cubits, the math teacher, who incidentally also taught gym, grabbed us both, dragging us to the principal's office. The look on his bearded face said he didn't care who was in the right.

The principal kept _paddles_ in his office, but I've heard that sort of `academic discipline' was being phased out.

Both our parents, of course, got called in from work. Dad gave me a dirty look, probably because I didn't defend myself, but I got this weird feeling like ET would have wanted it this way. I mean, sometimes I got the opposite of that feeling just eating foods containing meat.

One of the advantages to being beaten up, instead of having beaten someone up: Only you have a real solid ground to complain, and only you have the beauty marks to prove it. _And_ you don't have to write `I will night fight' a million times in a notebook.

When Mr. Hiskey dismissed me, Dad took me aside, muttering to me. "Guess in some ways you take after your mother more than you do me." He took a deep breath. "As much as I hate to say it, you probably did the right thing. Your suboptimal performance in battle might actually work in your favor. If you gain a reputation as a wimp, no one will mistake you for a top secret military property."

 _"Yeah,"_ I muttered. " _Wonderful._ "

"Next time, _just hit him in the crotch and poke him in the eyes_. That's gotten _me_ out of a _lot_ of scrapes." He rubbed my shoulder. "Congratulations about the _new cousin_ , by the way."

Dad left for work, and I returned to class.

I almost got brought back to the principal's office for passing notes. Jamie was telling me how this or that symbol on our diagrams stood for something or another. About the third time I sneaked her a note, my bird nosed science teacher, Mr. Sigler, intercepted it.

He smirked a little when he unfolded the paper. I could tell he was expecting a love letter.

When he saw all the symbols and such, he looked around the classroom like he thought someone was playing a practical joke.

The man turned the paper around and around a couple times, smirked, then added a few things, spreading the note out in front of me. "What are you trying to do, make explosives?"

I swallowed hard. If I said one wrong thing to him, he could cause so much unwanted attention for me that black vans would be there in an hour. "Um...it's kind of a game."

He kept staring at me like he intended to put me in an advanced placement test for college or something...and call the black van people.

"It's a board game. You know, like _Dungeons and Dragons_ , except it's science fiction. You know, _Star Wars?_ "

The man furrowed his brow. "Do you even know what these symbols mean?"

I shook my head. _"It's in a manual. I think most of them are alien words._ "

He poked a finger at a section. " _That's a chemical equation._ I just finished it for you."

"Uh, _thanks._ "

Everyone in class was staring at me. "Nerd," I heard more than a few whispering. Any one of them could march up to the office and make a call to someone in the CIA.

Mr. Sigler cleared his throat, tucking his pen into the pocket protector of his flannel shirt. "Going back to our lesson...Wolfgang, can you tell me the difference between a metamorphic and an igneous rock?"

I rubbed my face in frustration. Now was not a safe time to be smart. "Uh...metamorphic... _are the ones with crystals._ "

The teacher tapped the paper, frowned a little. "Mr. Mueller, _all three types of rocks have been known to feature crystals."_

I reddened. "I meant _quartz_. It's a metamorphic rock."

Mr. Sigler looked at me like I were crazy. "Quartzite _is_ metamorphic, but quartz can show up in sedimentary _and_ igneous rock formations." He folded up my paper, stuck it in his pocket. " _Pay attention_ , Mr. Mueller. If all that chemistry is required to ` _blow up the Death Star'_ , it wouldn't hurt to add some _geology_ to your repertoire."

I gave him a reluctant nod, mostly because I wanted the note back.

I endured a lecture on rocks. Sedimentation, calderas, tectonic movement, enduring his corny jokes about apatite, magnetite and such. I bombed a question about twin striations. Jamie, likewise, failed t properly explain what Plagioclase meant. Neither of us had to try very hard to be incorrect, the chemistry thing seemed to be a fluke.

I thought we were in the clear until the bell rang and Mr. Sigler kept us both from leaving.

The man leaned back on his desk, crossing his arms. "It's not unheard of for scientific geniuses to be related. William and Caroline Herschel, for example, were brother and sister, and they changed the world of astronomy. They discovered _comets_ , and the planet _Uranus_..."

"I'm not as smart as you think I am," I stammered.

The man grinned. " _You're just being modest_."

Jamie put her hands on her hips. "Like he said. _It's just a stupid board game._ We didn't even know what we were looking at until you told us."

I quickly added, "And we're never going to figure out how to stop Vader until I can get that note back."

"Nonsense," he said, tapping the side of his head. " _The answer's right up here. You only got to think about it a little._ "

He offered me the paper, then snatched it away before I could grab it. " _You guys are studying way above your grade level._ I'll bet what I'm teaching just isn't stimulating you enough."

My gut told me this was code for `I'm going to call the men in black vans.' Me and Jamie slowly shook our heads no.

 _"We have a test for geniuses such as yourselves._ _If you pass, you'll have the fast track to any college in the country._ How does that sound?"

A great reason to tell dad it's time to pack up and leave, I thought, giving Jamie a sideways glance.

"We don't want to be freaks, Mr. Sigler," my girlfriend blurted. " _In fact, you actually embarrassed us today_. Testing out is great and all, but we'll miss out on a lot of social experiences."

"We're out in the middle of nowhere. What exactly would you miss?"

 _"Whatever regular kids do at our ages._ "

The man squinted at my face. _"Like getting bullied?"_

"Whatever we do here, it builds _character,_ _for the rest of our life."_

The man rubbed his chin thoughtfully for a moment. "Did your father coach you into saying that?"

Jamie shot me a questioning glance. I only shrugged.

"Well, he _did_ mention it to me, but I think he's right. I hear prodigies miss out on all kinds of things like _homecoming, field trips, senior prom..._ You really can't get those back."

"Plus we really don't have a clue about geology," I said. "Or English, or history or..."

The man shook his head, handing the paper back. "All right. Have it your way. But from now on, _pay attention._ "

We both breathed a sigh of relief as we escaped the classroom.

"Could you imagine what would happen if I did one of those tests?" I said.

Jamie giggled. "Nothing, I'm guessing. We'd both get a big fat zero for other sciences, _and I really suck at math._ "

"Yeah, but he could send the paper to _Washington_. Or _Iowa_. Someone might put two and to together, no pun intended. We could get caught...You think I should tell Dad?"

She shook her head. " _Not unless you want to move out of town._ "

I sighed. "He's probably going to find out anyway, once we have parent teacher conferences."

 _"That's then._ You tell him now and he'll panic." She stared at me a moment. "Your eye _does_ look puffy on one side..."

"Dad says it's better this way. You know, me not being so conspicuously amazing."

 _"As long as he doesn't find out about science class."_

"Guess not."

She gave me a light peck on the cheek. "See you at lunch."

We only shared a couple classes. The other ones like English and social studies I took alone. Honestly, not as good at those things, but my inadequacy wouldn't stop anyone from calling me a nerd. Not after that science class.

At lunch, me and Jamie sat together. People snickered and murmured to one another, pointed to us. Only near the end of the thirty minutes did a plump long haired brunette come up to us and say, _"I heard your cousin kissed you on the mouth. Is that true?_ "

I reddened. _"...No._ "

 _"I'm adopted,"_ Jamie said. _"What's the big deal?"_

The stranger chuckled. "Nothing. _Just curious!_ "

I won't bore you with details of the rest of my day. I got educated, one of the teachers showed us _The Peanut Butter Solution_ , they dismissed us.

I accidentally bowled my sister over on the way out the door. She took a tumble down the front steps, but the stairs were short, so she didn't get hurt.

"Hey! Watch where you're going, you clumsy dumb head!"

As she got back up and dusted herself off, I noticed a Big Chief notebook had fallen out of her backpack, a few pages blowing away in the wind.

When I noticed the diagrams and equations, I rushed to grab them.

I stared at the large lined papers in disbelief. " _You had the same dream!_ "

My sister shrugged. "You dreamed about the big computery thing?"

I nodded. "We've _got_ to get home and piece this together!"

Michael always went straight to the furniture shop after school, so only the three of us returned to the cabin. Dad wasn't home, probably making up time at work.

I, Jamie and Gertie hurried to the basement, spending an hour trying to piece all our hasty scribblings together.

"How about we use one of your computers?" Jamie asked. "After all, that _was_ part of the dream..."

That seemed as good an idea as any, so I booted up a system, programmed in a few sections of our... _confusing mishmash of information_.

It was a tedious process. Coding was complicated, and I saved everything on a VIC-20 cassette tape machine. Not a terribly efficient memory device, even for restoring saved games on text adventures.

After spending an hour writing and rewriting code, Jamie muttered, "I wish there was some kind of _graphical interface_ we could use for all this."

"Graphical?" I said. "Like _pictures?_ "

"Um, yeah. So you can see what you're doing. Or at least little squares or picture boxes that you can move around."

 _"Like a window?_ "

"Yeah. _Like a window._ " 

"That's a great idea, Jamie. But I don't see how that'd work. Besides, we're just trying to get this thing to _run_ , not make it look pretty. We don't even know what it is yet."

"Hey... _Wolfgang_!" Dad called from the top of the stairs. "Found you something. Think you'll like it. _Some guy was throwing it out, along with a box of black plastic things."_

Dad brought me the floppy drive to an Apple II and some blank floppy disks.

The new drive actually helped. I knew how to rewire it to fit my computer, so we had some memory stability.

After we'd been at this for a couple hours, Dad visited our lab again. "Don't you kids have _homework_? _Real homework,_ I mean?"

"This is important," I said.

 _"So's homework._ C'mon. Get going or I'll shut down the lab."

We did what we were told. After homework was dinner, and shopping for clothes.

The pay at Dad's job wasn't great. He often had to call the utilities people and credit card companies for extensions, so we had to get Jamie a wardrobe from Maj-R-Thrift. It wouldn't win us any popularity contests, but it wasn't like we could afford better. We were lucky to have what we did, with Ruby out of the picture.

When we at last returned to the lab, I discovered that Gertie had stuck stuff up in between parts of our diagram, a crossword, stationary from the phone stand in the living room, pages from the TV Guide...

"Hey!" I cried. "Gertie! What did you do!"

"I think Dad had the dream, he just doesn't want to tell us."

I stared at the crossword. He'd filled all the boxes with symbols, trailing out at the edges. He'd `doodled' similar things while on the phone, negotiating with debt collectors and utilities people.

His contribution was a jumbled mess, parts of it doubling back on other parts. One equation he had scribbled right through a _Peanuts_ cartoon. We had to do a rubbing on the paper to figure out what he meant.

Ironically, he'd filled in one line of the crossword with the word `Palimpsest.' When I looked it up in the dictionary, I decided it was a pretty good description of his handwriting.

Out of desperation, I took our carefully pieced together duplication up to dad for an explanation of what clearly seemed to be missing.

He scratched his head. "I don't know. That's just some crap I dreamed about. Doesn't mean anything."

"Yeah?" I said. "Well, it's neat, and I can't read parts of it."

 _"I'm shocked that you can read any of it!"_ He shrugged, took a pen, and drew some stuff on our paper. "If you think you can use this to build your bomb, you're crazier than I thought."

"Is that all you...dreamed about?"

Dad laughed. "Before I appeared naked in my high school cafeteria? Hell, I don't know, I guess there were some other pieces that go along with all that gobbledygook, but I figured they were just...things I picked up in college. You know, like Newton's Constant, or Einstein's Law of Thermodynamics, or whatever the hell you call those things. I only jotted down the stuff you can't dig up at the library. You know, _the weird stuff."_

It was too late in the day to go to the library. We'd gone shopping about the time it closed for the day, and you couldn't just jump on the computer and pull up a science book. We would have needed a phone number of someone crazy enough to type all of that into their machine, someone who would let us dial in anytime we wanted, and we didn't know anyone like that.

I told the others about the predicament.

Jamie sighed. "Guess we'll just have to wait until tomorrow to figure out what this is."

As fate would have it, Michael _was_ taking a chemistry class in high school, and early in the semester, the teacher had given them all textbooks that weren't exactly appropriate for the course.

The teacher said the books didn't explain the material very well, and it often went off in strange tangents unrelated to chemistry. Michael was supposed to turn his in, but he kept forgetting that the book had been used to prop up a wobbly table leg.

The teacher was right. The book seemed to be written for scientists who already knew everything, its only strength seeming to be brevity, making it a good fit for the table.

That being said, we did find the reference section in the back _very interesting_. A couple of those equations fit perfectly into our _system_.

The moment I punched the last character in, a _glowing sphere_ appeared in the air in front of us, roughly the size of a baseball.

I don't know how it happened. I mean, in addition to making my own computers, I _had_ been experimenting with a laser, but the only thing I'd been able to do with it was make sort of a burglar alarm, slowly cut holes in wood, and scan in a serial number. Somehow this _thing_ , this _program,_ used that to create an energy field. Maybe it manipulated electromagnetism, or vibrated air particles. Whatever the reason, I now had a glowing orb.

"What do you think it is?" Jamie asked.

"Dunno."

Gertie pointed to the screen. "Look! _Pictures!"_

It seemed we _had_ created a graphical user interface, after all. The monitor now displayed a _blueprint_ of the cabin basement.

"Hey neat!" Jamie said, rushing to the keyboard. "Maybe it's like Pac-Man!"

The moment she pushed an arrow key, all hell broke loose.

It turned out that a dot on the monitor represented the location of our orb, and when Jamie held down the right arrow, a whole shelf of tools and computer equipment came crashing to the floor.

The orb whipped around, broke a bunch of mason jars, scattered a socket set, obliterated a potted plant.

The ball shattered the basement window, and I heard a cat screeching outside.

"Elliott!" Dad yelled. "What in the Sam hell are you doing down there!"


	11. Chapter 11: Bubbles

In response to Guest (geistklempner-I'm unable to private message a non member), this is not supposed to be an _Explorers_ fanfic or crossover. Although I liked _Explorers_ , I was wanting the ending to be different. If you're a fan of the other movie, you may find some of this to be familiar, but keep reading. The plot is going off in a completely different direction.

[0000]

* * *

I shut off the computer, but not before we'd discovered that the machine mapped out more than just the interior of buildings.

Dad practically fell headlong rushing down the stairs to investigate.

"Boy!" he shouted, pointing his finger.

He stopped, staring at the mess. "You _really did_ make a bomb, didn't you?"

"No," I protested. "It's not like that. It's..."

Jamie spoke before I could offer my own muddled explanation. " _It's safer._ "

Dad laughed. " _Sure as hell could have fooled me!_ " He frowned at the smashed window. "Great. _That's just what we need._ "

He made us staple plastic over the damage, and then he just stood there, staring at us with his arms crossed. "I'd ground you, but you seem perfectly content to stay indoors."

 _"Nothing's on fire,"_ Jamie pointed out.

Dad rolled his eyes. _"True...But you made a mess, probably disturbed the whole neighborhood."_

 _"They probably just thought we were playing baseball,"_ said Gertie.

He kept staring. "Your _mother_ would have _freaked out_ and _punished you. You certainly deserve it._ Myself, _well...I set up this lab for a reason_. The only question I must ask is, is there _any money making potential involved here? Alternative fuel,_ that kind of thing? _At least spare me the inconvenience of stopping at gas stations!"_

"Um," I stammered. " _Maybe?_ "

Dad gave me a skeptical look. "That's a _no_ , isn't it? You gave me the same ` _Maybe_ ' before I tried selling your computers."

 _"It looks like something the military could use,"_ Jamie said.

He winced. "Let's, uh, _keep that under the category of `home defense'_ for the time being. I'll leave you to it, as long as you don't blow up the cabin anymore."

"We didn't blow it-" I began, but Jamie just elbowed me.

"We'll test it away from the house from now on."

I could read dismay in Dad's face, but she cleared it up by adding, " _It's a secure place. No one will see us._ "

He gave us a reluctant nod, then marched up to our paperwork, developing that look he got when he forgot where he parked the car.

"You dreamed about it too, didn't you?" Gertie asked.

As sort of an answer, Dad replied, "Have you ever considered the possibility that your little green man may have an ulterior motive?"

"Like what?" I said. "ET's my friend."

Gertie looked puzzled. "What's an all...terrier...ult...ter?"

Dad smiled and rubbed her head. "You know... _ulterior_. Like, when Tom Sawyer's dad told him to paint a fence, so Tom tells the neighbor kids how fun it is to do his job, so his lazy ass doesn't have to paint it himself. _You got a secret agenda that you're not telling folks._ "

"ET's not like that, and, and even if he was, I wouldn't mind painting his fences."

Dad sighed. " _Tyke, how do you know you can trust him?_ Maybe when he goes home he takes his face off and eats people like they do in that TV show."

"Dad," I said. _"He doesn't want to eat us. He had plenty of chances._ Mostly he just ate Reese's Pieces."

Dad laughed. "You sure? _Maybe he just wasn't hungry._ "

When he noticed my serious expression, he groaned, continuing his line of thought. "Say you're a _Zulu_ , living in a hut in Africa, and some _rich white factory owner_ gives you _blueprints_ to a power station. Okay, so maybe you make your own light bulbs or fans or something, but the guy's got an _agenda_. Next thing you know, he's trying to _sell you a bunch of stuff you don't need,_ or _the power station is something they need to run a new factory_ _that will make him millions._ Kills all the plants, dumps trash everywhere. You see my point?"

 _"But ET loves plants!"_ Gertie argued. "He'd never do that!"

"Yeah? _What about his cousins? What about his government?"_

She didn't have an answer to that.

"...For all we know, his planet could look like a trash dump. Maybe your friend is like one of those treehugger types that's trying to un-mess up our environment."

Gertie's facial expression reminded me of that time when mom told her that babies came `From a woman's tummy.'

"Wait," Jamie said. "He can't be both a tree hugger _and_ an industrial expansionist."

"Okay, so what if his little machine starts blowing up lumber mills and McDonald's restaurants, and putting granola eating John Denver in the White House? My point is, we don't know anything about all this. _You've got Pandora's Box. It could do anything,_ if it doesn't alert the FBI and everyone else to our presence first. _"_

 _"We'll be careful."_

Dad's response sounded skeptical. _"If you say so."_

Michael, having gotten home about this time, joined us in the disaster area, looking annoyed at all the broken stuff. " _You guys are nuts._ "

For the next hour, Dad had us clean everything up and put things away.

It had gotten really late, and Dad wanted to sleep, so we couldn't do any further experiments. "Off to bed, Doctor Oppenheimer," he had said.

For Jamie, Dad had gotten an old army cot out of storage, setting it up next to Gertie's bed. Gertie got all excited about it because it was like she'd gained a big sister and they were having a slumber party or whatever. She kept the lights on, dolling my girlfriend's hair and playing around until Dad got mad and yelled, "Jan! Cindy! Stop screwing around and get to bed!"

 _"My name's Anna,"_ Gertie corrected.

"It's a Brady Bunch reference!" he snapped. "I know tomorrow is Saturday, _but some people have to work!_ Sleep! Now!"

I, on the other hand, found myself just lying in bed with the lights off, staring at the ceiling.

"Elliott..." Jamie was calling me on the walkie.

I picked up. "You can't sleep either?"

"You think Edison slept when he got the idea for the light bulb?"

"I've heard people thought of the light before him, but yeah, he probably didn't sleep..."

"So what do you think we just made?"

"I'm not sure. It seems to be some kind of energy field. Maybe when we finally get our spaceship built, we can use it to, I don't know, _smash asteroids_? You know, like a _photon torpedo_ or something?" I mean, if you fire a gun in space, your whole body goes flying back in the opposite direction, so this could prevent that...Anyways, we won't know until we test it some more. Away from the house."

A moment later, Dad's voice came on the walkie-talkie. _"Go to bed, kids! Over and out!"_

I didn't dream about anything special, just flying like Peter Pan and getting lost on the way to school with lions chasing after me.

A gravelly male voice awakened me from my slumber.

When I crept into the living room, I discovered a strange black man sitting with dad. The visitor had a short afro, a kind looking face, mustache, his well toned arms poking out of a Celtics jersey. He laughed and smoked, telling Dad a story I couldn't hear.

The moment Dad noticed me spying, he grinned and muttered to the stranger, waving me over. "Elliott, this is _Nicholas_ , Ruby's brother."

Nick shook my hand. " _Any friend of Ruby's is a friend of mine._ "

I gave Dad a questioning look.

 _"Relax, kid. He's been briefed."_ He continued his conversation. "How _is_ she holding up?"

 _"As well as can be expected._ They had her locked up, but they let her out of the place. `Still can't so much as fart without some guy in a black van following her around."

 _"And the girls?"_

 _"They're fine._ She's doing the single mom thing. You _know_ that's nothing new to her."

Dad sighed. "I hate having to choose between her and _my_ brats. She's not mad, is she?"

"She's not mad, is she?"

Nick gave him a slight smirk. "Naw. She still loves the hell out of you. You may be white, but you're a good man."

"You tell her _I still love the hell out of her._ "

"Is it true you proposed?"

Dad shrugged. _"Can't say I see that ever happening now..._ "

Nick frowned. " _I know_. Some heavy sh-" he gave me a sideways glance. " _Stuff_ going down..."

"You're a good brother, Nick. It's so hard for me to find people I can trust these days."

 _"I know what it's like to be on the run._ Believe you me, I have no love for the po-po. I've had five years' worth of experience on the subject."

Dad gave him a wry smile. " _Had mine remanded to community service._ "

Nick rolled his eyes. "Steve, _sometimes you got a bad habit of not knowing when to stop talking."_

I pointed to a Topsy's bucket on the table. "What's with the popcorn?"

The man gave me a cheesy grin. " _Peace offering._ The girls couldn't just walk out of your dad's house with _a wad of cash and a handgun_ , not with all those government types watching, so they staged a little _movie night.._.I think there's a love letter under the cinnamon."

"I'm not going to blow my hand off if I decide to eat caramel, am I?" Dad joked.

Nick grinned. " _Naw, man, it's under the butter side._ Only the _shells_ are in the caramel..."

I stared, wondering how they managed to pull off that trick without being caught. "So Ruby just handed you the bucket, and nobody said anything?"

Our guest laughed. "Naw, man! Nothing that easy to trace. _We played kind of a shell game. Filled the bucket a few times along the way._ I was actually the last one to get it. _At one time, the army dudes actually made us open it up. Good thing they didn't check the weight._ "

By now, Gertie had awakened. "Daddy, who's this?"

Dad put a hand on our guest's shoulder. "Sugar, this is Nick, Ruby's brother."

My sister wrinkled her nose. "Smoking's bad for you."

Nick chuckled. "Are you certain, little miss? `Cuz I've seen some _old assed Indians..._ "

The look on Dad's face said `Play time is over, Nick.' "C'mon. She's right. _Indians roll their own, and they'd be dead if they smoked like you do._ _Put it out."_

"What about George Burns?"

 _"He smokes cigars."_

Nick stubbed out his cigarette, glanced at the door to the hallway. _"Damn, man, how many kids you got?_ "

Jamie had been watching us. Dad shot her a disapproving glance. "I only gained one extra since last time. _Not mine._ _Let's just call it an adoption."_

Our visitor furrowed his brow, making this face like he recognized the girl. "She's...cute. What's her name?"

 _"Lori_. She was homeless, so I took her in."

The look on Nick's face said he didn't buy it. "You sure she don't got _parents_ looking for her?"

Dad shrugged. " _One of the many disadvantages of being a fugitive from the law._ "

Nick nodded, rising from the table. " _I'll do some research._ "

He shook Dad's hand, waved me and Gertie goodbye, smiled at Lori, and gave Michael a "Goodbye, young man" on the way out the door, Mike seeming to know the guy already.

"Are we having popcorn for breakfast?" Gertie asked.

Dad had made our breakfast while talking to Nick, but of course the little visit had delayed him, so he didn't have time to read us Ruby's letter. He merely fished the items out and left for work.

Being that Mike was off to the shop, it was just us, so as usual, we were to not go far from the house, and keep the place locked up if we went somewhere...he also gave Gertie instructions to report to him if things between me and Jamie got _"More than familial."_

My sister had grimaced and asked, " _You mean like kissing and stuff?_ "

In response, Dad had laughed and rubbed her head. _"Exactly."_

When he was out of earshot, Jamie cried, "Great! Now what do we do? If that guy finds out who I am, he'll tell your dad!"

 _"He also said he wasn't friends with the police,"_ I pointed out. "Besides, you're the one who ran away from home. You didn't want to tell dad, so I guess you just gotta cross your fingers and hope he doesn't find out anything."

She frowned. "Gee, thanks a lot!"

"What! I don't know how to help you. You're going to get caught, I just don't know when. Want to live in that abandoned building again or something?"

Jamie gave me a look like she might. "Maybe I'll sneak out the moment he finds out."

I sighed. "Maybe you should just go back home."

She reddened. "No way! You're the coolest boy I ever met! Besides...what do you think they'll do to _me_ if I go back?"

I shrugged. "I'm guessing they won't lock you up like they did me."

 _"You made my chest glow."_

I blushed. "Yeah, but _they_ don't know that."

She abruptly changed the subject. "Let's go field test that asteroid smasher thing."

In case you're wondering, things stayed "Familial." We had a lot more important things to do.

As I mentioned before, I'd been doing some experiments with alternate sources of electricity. Dad let me take apart some bad discarded car batteries for this purpose. A little sunlight, a little plant pulp, and a few lines from our Dungeons and Dragons manual got me all the power I needed to make my asteroid crusher mobile. We placed the equipment in the Radio Flyer and a wheelbarrow and set up everything in a heavily wooded area downhill from the cabin.

I set the computer u on a stump.

"We're missing _Kidd Video_ ," Gertie complained as she watched me type.

Jamie stared. "What's Kidd Video?"

 _"It's a show._ It's got a rock band and they get sucked into a mirror and someone turns them into cartoons." I groaned. " _You want to watch cartoons, or see ET again?_ "

"ET," Gertie sighed, sitting down on a rock.

"What do you expect to accomplish with all this anyway?" Jamie asked. "I mean, say you build this. _..spaceship_ , and actually get into space. What then? What are you trying to do?"

I shrugged. "Dunno. _Maybe go someplace where I don't have to hide?_ "

"So you're just going to leave earth and live with your alien friend forever?"

"I don't really have a choice! I mean, what else _can_ I do?"

"You're talking about leaving your planet and your whole family behind."

"I've pretty much done that anyway. The moment I go back to mom, some guy in a van is going to pop out and drag me off to an army base. Either that, or I'll spend my whole life in hiding."

"What about your sister?"

"Yeah!" Gertie exclaimed. "What about me!"

I swallowed. "I'll take you along with me. I don't want anyone putting you in a cell again."

My sister looked glum. "But then I'll never see mommy."

"Gertie, _I don't think we're going to get_ to see mommy again."

This made her burst into tears, so I held her.

"Tell me it's not true!" she whimpered. "Please, Elliott!"

"I...I can't. _We're freaks,_ and those guys in vans want to stick us in an army base forever. If anyone tells you otherwise, they're probably lying."

She cried more, but all I could do was hold her and pat her back. " _You're saying ET is our family now?_ _We're going to leave daddy, too?_ "

"We're only making things hard for him. He has to keep hiding from the cops and stuff. That's no kind of life. If we go into space, and live with ET, he won't have to worry about us being captured again."

"But then he'll go to jail! And what about Michael?"

I shook my head. "I guess we probably should take Mike along..." And then to Jamie I stammered, " _And if you wanted, you could join us..._ "

"Why not fly to _Mexico_...or _Australia?_ Or even better yet, _a deserted island?_ You don't have to leave the planet!"

 _"Someone could still find me."_

Jamie rubbed her face. "They could find you anyway, with _radar_ , or a _satellite_. By the way, _what's your dad going to do?_ "

I shook my head. "He's the one that broke me out. He'll understand. I'd ask him to come with, but it already sounds like he doesn't trust ET very much."

"How do you even know you'll be safe with.. _.ET's people_? For that matter, how do you know they'll have _air?_ "

"He seemed to breathe my air just fine."

"You ever seen that _Twilight Zone_ about the guy that gets put in the zoo? That could be you, Elliott!"

 _"And I'll get locked in a cell if I go home._ What's the difference?"

We made the orb appear again.

Jamie frowned at the display. "I wish your friend had given us some instructions."

"Wait," I said. " _Maybe he has._ "

I rushed back to the cabin, returning with the two books Jamie had brought from my old house. After studying the alien's handwriting for a few moments, I discovered our new invention was more than a weapon. "Wait. It says here we can reshape the thing."

Thanks to ET's writing, we discovered that the sphere could be opened and closed in different ways, and got a pretty good idea of how to control it.

Now, a squirrel had been watching us the whole time from the bough of a tree. I know, it's weird, but some animals are funny, and just sit there and stare at you, especially if you don't make any sudden moves.

Upon spotting it, Jamie pointed and pushed me away from the keypad, quickly typing commands into the system.

The squirrel let out a frantic squeal as the glowing orb appeared around its little body, lifting it into the air.

It rolled around and around inside the ball, like a hamster in an exercise toy, then gave up, lying flat on the bottom as it passively surrendered to the experience. I have never heard a squirrel make weirder noises.

We must have toyed with the poor thing a little too long. It stopped moving, and didn't appear to be breathing.

"You killed it!" Gertie cried. "Shut it off! Shut it off!"

I quickly did so, rushing to examine our fuzzy little test subject.

"What do you think happened?" Jamie asked.

I shrugged, squinting at the tiny creature to see if its chest had moved. It _really did_ look dead. "Not sure. Maybe he ran out of air."

 _"Oh I feel so bad!"_

Gertie started crying. "No! _Mister Squirrel!"_

The squirrel let out a feeble gasp, then opened its beady black eyes.

A huge breath followed, then several frightened shallow breaths as it realized it had been surrounded by humans.

With a quack, and a terrified shriek, the rodent bolted, shooting off like a rocket into the brush somewhere.

"That's interesting," Jamie said. "If we can lift a squirrel, we can probably move a whole person."

"Yeah, but anyone who tries it will just pass out like that squirrel."

"Any idea why he didn't stop breathing the moment we put him in the bubble?"

"The same reason why a fish will live if you scoop it out of a river with a bucket."

My sister stepped in the little clearing in front of our equipment. "Do me next. I'll hold my breath." She inhaled and kept it in to illustrate.

"No, Gertie!" I protested. "It's too dangerous!"

"Please? _I want to show Mister Squirrel I'm sorry._ "

"Gertie, _he's just a squirrel._ "

 _"And you're just a person,_ " she pouted. "He was okay, you just did it too long. _I'll hold my breath, I promise."_

 _"Gertie..."_

"How are we ever going to see ET if you're too chicken to let me try it?" she whimpered.

"She's got a point," Jamie said. "You saw how that squirrel flew. We just got to be careful about how long we leave her in the bubble."

My sister grinned. "Yaay!"

Gertie didn't hold her breath. At least, not before we put her in the bubble. Still, she seemed okay, even when she forgot and tried to breathe. She giggled as we floated her around the trees, way up above the branches and canopy.

All of a sudden, my sister looked _suspiciously tired_.

"Gertie!" I called. "Are you all right?"

She shrugged. "I dunno. I.. _.guess_. I feel... _sleepy._ "

"Quick!" Jamie cried. "Get her down!"

As my fingers rushed across the keyboard, my friend hurried underneath the bubble, arms outstretched. "Gertie! Get ready to fall!"

In her semiconscious state, Gertie didn't even try to prepare herself. Jamie had to jump back a foot to grab her before she hit the ground.

For a moment, my sister just gasped in Jamie's arms.

"Are you all right?"

Gertie nodded. "I...just... _couldn't breathe_ , and my head got all swimmy and I saw stars."

 _"Running out of air will do that to you."_

My girlfriend and I stared at each other.

 _"You know what this means, don't you?"_

Jamie nodded. "But what are we going to do about the oxygen supply?"

I saw a guy making compressed air in a movie once. He hooked two empty barrels together with surgical tubing and poured water into one of them. The water forced the air in the other tank to compress. I improvised a small version of that by soldering together coffee cans and an industrial sized peanut butter jar.

Jamie frowned at my invention. "Couldn't we just swipe some oxygen equipment from a nursing home?"

I looked at her like she were crazy. "How could you even suggest such a thing?"

She shrugged. "I've seen some people _stockpile them_. They're on a temporary recovery situation, back from the hospital or something, you know, `on the mend', and the paperwork gets messed up and then nobody comes to pick up the extra tanks."

I stared, thinking she might be onto something, after all. "Do you... _know_ somebody like that?"

 _"In California."_

I rolled my eyes. _"That's helpful._ Anyways, ET's book showed me how to make a few things that could triple the natural air production of plants. I think we could probably do that." I tapped the coffee cans. "We could also _build a bigger one of these_ , I mean, _fill a trash can with water or something..."_

"And breathe in garbage? _Gross!_ "

"I think there's a few _rain barrels_ around here somewhere..."

Gertie was small, and had little lungs. That's why we let her play astronaut again.

She got stuck in a tree and broke our homemade scuba tank. She had to hold her breath while we lowered her down in the bubble.

We spent the rest of the day trying to figure out how to build our vehicle out of our bubble machine, and some sort of air apparatus.

Okay, well, Gertie was trying to make flight suits out of shower curtains and pajamas, but Jamie and I spent our time drawing up materials lists, scrounging up whatever we could that matched the item's description.

"So," Dad said when he came home a little while later. "What did you kids blow up today?"

"Nothing," I said.

"It's not a bomb," Gertie blurted. "We made a giant bubble, and I flew. _I actually flew!_ I'm going to be an _astronaut!_ "

Dad rolled his eyes when he noticed the sewing job she'd given to her pajamas. _"Is that a fact."_

 _"I was the alien monster,"_ Jamie said, spinning it into the `pretend' direction.

My sister's face turned a bright red. "No you weren't! _You were helping me fly!_ Tell him the truth!"

Jamie gave him a cheesy grin. "Oh yeah! _I completely forgot!_ We _were_ doing that!" She made pretend spaceship noises, pantomiming walking on the moon. _"Shooooommm!"_

And that's how Dad blew it off as a game. Not much of a stretch, really. Who would believe that we actually made my sister float in the air with a computer program?

We ate dinner, and Dad read Ruby's letter to us, well, _the parts suitable for kids._ My guess is that he had been savoring the note all day long, refusing to read it until he got home, for he seemed as excited to read it as we were to hear it.

In the letter, she said she missed us, she said that mom was still trying to find us, and talking to the cops a lot. They had a warrant out for Dad's arrest.

I flinched when Dad read about "One of E/W's classmates" going missing. The moment he read that line, I could tell all the pieces had fallen together in his head.

He suddenly stopped reading, just glaring at me, breathing heavily through his nose, hands shaking as they crinkled the edges of the paper.

Dad set the paper down, balling his fists. He looked ready to hit someone.

"I'm disappointed in you, Elliott. _Real disappointed. You lied to me._ "


	12. Chapter 12: The Dam Bursts

I paled as I felt Dad's glare cutting through me. I wasn't even making eye contact, and I could still feel the anger. "I'm sorry. I...I trust her, but I didn't think you would."

More sighing through his nose. I felt his gaze turn toward my girlfriend. " _And you, young lady...I'll get Nick to drive you home._ "

"Please don't!" Jamie whimpered. "I won't tell anyone anything! I promise!"

 _"Good. `Counting on it. You'd be getting us into a lot more trouble than we're in already._ Of course, your folks have probably already sent the cops after us, _and if you can find us, so can they._ " He got up from the table.

"Wait!" she protested. "Where are you going!"

 _"Calling Nick._ What else?"

"Don't! Look, Mr. Mueller, _my chest was glowing, just like your son!_ And for the record, I didn't track you guys down the normal way. _ET told me_ how to find you!"

Dad smirked. " _Nice try. Did Elliott put you up to this?_ "

"Yes, I mean, only because he kissed me. Somehow he... _transferred something to me_. The point is, if I go home, they'll just put me in a cell like your son."

Dad leaned over the table. " _Then you'll have to leave town._ "

"But what am I going to do about food and housing?"

"You did it before somehow. You'll have to do it again. I'm sorry. Ordinarily I wouldn't put a child out on the street, but if they find you, _they find my sons, they find me_. _We all go off in a big black van._ "

"You can't send her away!" I protested. "I'll run away too!"

Dad sighed, rubbed his face, winding up for a verbal barrage. He almost _yelled_ his reply. "You think you're so smart? What are _you_ going to eat? Where will _you_ sleep? What'll happen our little science project? _More importantly, how will you hide from the authorities?_ "

I sighed, fumbling for answers.

Jamie started crying.

"Don't do that," Dad groaned. "Please don't."

This only made Jamie cry more. "I've been glowing just like him. They'll take me back and do experiments on me! I just know it! I'm not going back! You're just going to let a poor kid live on the street?" She kept sobbing.

Dad rubbed his face. "Dammit. All right, all right. You can stay." He massaged his temples like he had a migraine.

Dad was a self proclaimed "Stay home Baptist." We never went to church, which is probably good, considering how people were looking for us, and we were running a risk even going to school. "I've seen a few cops going to church," Dad had told us once. "Elsewhere, they don't have as many excuses to hang out."

And so Dad watched golf and football on Sundays, worked on the truck, ran errands, making us help him... _a lot_. Not the best time to be building a spaceship or testing things, not with him constantly watching us and trying to get us to do stuff around the house.

Now that he'd found out about Jamie, he was paranoid, afraid to even let us leave the house. We replaced the basement window (once Dad brought the item home), made more plans for our ship.

"What you did yesterday wasn't very nice," Gertie said to Jamie when Dad left for the store. "You made it sound like I made everything up. _I really did fly_ , and he didn't believe me."

She'd tried to convince Dad of this again at breakfast, and earnestly too, but Dad only smiled and rubbed her head. " _Of course you did, sugar."_

"I'm sorry," Jamie said. "Look, this kind of thing is hard for _anyone_ to believe if you don't actually show them. And if your dad actually saw what we did, he'd never let us experiment with it again. _You nearly passed out, Gertie._ "

My sister reddened. _"I had oxygen!"_

"I know, I know. But until we have this thing looking safe as a car, I'm afraid your dad is going to get in the way. I mean, _he almost kicked me out the moment he learned about me!_ "

"You shouldn't have lied. People get in trouble all the time because they lie about things. If they all told the truth, bad things wouldn't happen so much."

"I know, I know," Jamie groaned. "Can we at least get this spaceship... _space worthy_ before we unveil our little project?"

Gertie reluctantly nodded.

Don't ask me how she did it, but Gertie somehow managed to bring "Mister Squirrel" inside the house. It actually sat on her arm and let her pet it. When Dad saw this, he panicked, ordering her to get him out of the house. _"That's a wild animal! You want to get rabies?"_

"He doesn't have rabies," my sister told him.

Dad laughed. _"And how do you know that? Did you ask him?"_

Looking very serious, Gertie nodded and said "Uh huh. I asked if he was sick, and he said no."

Dad groaned. "All right, Gertie. Enough fun and games with the wildlife. Get him out of here. It's bad enough I'm a kidnapper. No need to get _child endangerment_ added to my rap sheet."

And so Gertie sent the squirrel away.

After a whole day of hiding like Anne Frank (he didn't let us outside at all - he even shopped without us), Dad said, "Okay, this isn't going to work. We have to look normal or people are going to snoop on _me_ for making _you_ disappear. That means you all go to school tomorrow."

I awoke the next morning to a grabby arm and a sensation of warm breath in my face. Apparently, during the night, Jamie had snuck into my bed.

I let out a startled cry, rolling away from her.

My body, clad in longjohns, ran out of mattress and thumped on the floor. I sprang to my feet, retreating to the corner.

Jamie propped her head up on her elbow, giving me a mischievous grin. _"Good morning._ "

I was too flustered to do anything but stammer.

Gertie had been watching us from the doorway. "I'm telling daddy."

Jamie sat up, straightening her oversized Grateful Dead shirt. "You do that, and I'll tell him you let Mister Squirrel sleep on your pillow."

I gawked at my sister. " _You slept with Mister Squirrel on your pillow?_ "

Gertie scrunched up her face. " _He likes me,_ okay?"

"We didn't do anything," Jamie blurted. "By the way, Elliott... _cute pajamas._ "

I reddened. "They're longjohns."

I took a cold shower, went to breakfast.

"Daddy," Gertie said in between mouthfuls of cereal. "If we took a spaceship to another planet, and stayed there a long time, would you miss us?"

Dad furrowed his brow. "That's a strange question, sugar... _Did your Martian friend say he was coming back or something?_ "

Gertie shook her head. "I'm just asking. _I mean, if we were to build a spaceship, and..._ "

Dad laughed. He still didn't believe we were capable of anything that fantastic. _"Of course I'd miss you, baby. Why wouldn't I?"_

My sister took a deep breath. "Elliott was saying that you'd be relieved, because you wouldn't have to hide anymore."

"Gertie!" I cried.

Dad crossed his arms indignantly. "Elliott, _what's this crap you've been feeding your sister?_ "

I sighed. "Dad, I know... _this whole situation...It's been hard on you._ "

Dad swallowed. "That doesn't mean I don't love you. _Don't you realize that me, being here with you guys, has made me the happiest I've been since, well, since me and your mom were on speaking terms? Don't you know how hard I've been fighting to get custody?"_

I stared, speechless.

"I wanted you to come with us to meet ET," Gertie said. "But Elliott didn't think you'd want that."

Jamie, who had just finished showering, chose that moment to join us at the table. "ET's going to come back. With his friends. Are you honestly telling us that you want to go with them? To some unknown place on the other end of the galaxy?"

Dad, who had been lifting a mug of coffee to his lips, spilled some on his beard. "Wait. He _is_ coming back?"

Gertie shot me a questioning look. I shrugged.

 _"Not anytime soon, but yeah_. You really want to come along?"

Dad wiped his face with a towel. _"Whoa whoa whoa! No one's going anywhere! I lost you kids once, I'll be damned if I lose you again!"_

"You won't lose us if you come along," Gertie insisted.

Dad sighed, rubbing his chin. _"You're serious. They're going to pick you up and fly you off to...Dagobah._ "

"It's called _Jufuceri_ , _The Green Planet_. _He told me._ "

He frowned, appearing to give it some serious thought. " _Do they have breathable air?_ "

Gertie nodded eagerly. "Elliott's-"

Before she could finish, I said, " _Their ship_ will have plenty."

My sister sighed. "His planet does too. _And two moons._ _He told me._ "

 _"And that makes it all true,"_ Dad groaned.

He thoughtfully sipped from the mug. " _So you're saying there's exactly enough air to carry you across the span of our solar system_ (which incidentally is thousands of light years - we can barely make it to the moon, let alone Mars!) _and food, and water, and equipment to stall any sort of degenerative atrophy you might experience in a weightless environment._ "

"ET doesn't use rocket fuel," Gertie said. "It didn't even take a second for his ship to leave earth!"

Dad grimaced, looking not at all convinced. _"Still, this isn't just a trip to corner 7-11. We're talking about hundreds upon thousands of miles._ "

Jamie was giving me this look like we should completely rethink our plans. "Um, Mr. Mueller..."

"It's _Henshaw_. _Mueller's just my alias._ "

"Fine. _Mister Henshaw. Say they only flew us all to another country, or a deserted island. Would that be better?"_

Dad's eyes narrowed. _"You really want to play Swiss Family Robinson for the rest of your life?_ "

 _"We were going to play_ Lost In Space _just a minute ago._ That'd probably be worse. Anyways, none of us can go home, can we?"

Dad sighed through his nose. "Let's table this discussion for when your space buddies actually show up."

"The spaceship needs to be bigger," Gertie told me. _"For him."_

"Now I'm confused. _Are you building a ship, or is one coming to you?"_

"Both," Jamie said.

Dad chuckled. _"In that case, maybe I_ could _squish myself into a tin can for a couple hours..."_

Jamie, catching my pained expression, just rolled her eyes and shook her head, as if to say, `It figures.'

"How come ET keeps telling you all this stuff in secret?" I asked my sister as we walked to school.

"She made it up," Jamie said.

"I didn't make up anything!" Gertie shouted. "ET _really does_ talk to me! Maybe you can't hear him because he wants us to work as a team. Maybe he feels sorry for me because I kinda get left out of stuff."

 _"Left out! You were our first astronaut!"_

 _"After I begged you. And you made daddy think everything is a joke!_ I'm _proud_ of what I did!"

I put a hand on her shoulder. "I'm proud of you too. I just don't think this is something we should involve grownups in."

"We have to involve him _eventually! He's our dad!"_

Jamie stopped and stared at me. "You think that's why ET only talks to her? Because we're fighting?"

"Dunno. In Peter Pan, the adults couldn't fly. Maybe Gertie's more connected to him because she's not as grown up as we are."

"So what happens to us when we get to his place? _Will he kick us out for being too old?"_

I frowned. "I...don't know."

 _"ET wouldn't do that!"_ Gertie said. " _He likes you!_...I think he just wants you to be nicer to me."

I gave her an apologetic look, but before I could say something, she added, "Also, ET says you're scared, and he doesn't want to frighten you. You probably could hear him yourself if you just tried to listen harder."

"You're right. I... _do_ get scared, especially when he makes me glow."

"That's why you're such a good astronaut, Gertie," Jamie said. " _You're not afraid of anything._ "

My sister grinned at this. We kept walking.

Michael, who had been eavesdropping the whole time, asked, "What's all this astronaut talk?"

"Long story," I said.

He stopped. "That's what you said yesterday when I asked you what all that stuff was in the basement."

I glanced at Gertie. The look on her face told me I couldn't let her down again. "We're building a spaceship. We've got an engine and everything. _It actually works._ "

Mike looked skeptical. _"You're serious."_

"You saw how we trashed the basement, didn't you?"

He scratched his head. "So what happens if you build this thing? You honestly think you can fly it up to...God knows where, and meet up with our space man?"

"It'll work," said Gertie. _"We've done tests. I flew._ "

I could tell Mike didn't buy it. "You... _flew._ "

"She's not lying," Jamie said. "It uses energy fields or something. We sent her up in the air and everything."

 _"We can take you with us,"_ Gertie said with a smile. " _You, dad, Elliott, Jamie, me, we can all go see ET together!_ It'll be fun!"

Michael gave me this look like Gertie had gone crazy.

"Whenever you get some free time, and I'm off school, I'll show you. This thing actually works."

 _"You...honestly built a spaceship."_

"Not exactly. We're still trying to get parts together, but we've got an engine."

"And pressure shielding," said Jamie.

"Say you're telling the truth, and you _do_ have some sort of starship engine. What are you doing for air?"

 _"We got a few plans_. Plant based air supplies, pressurized air...maybe borrowing medical supplies if we find anyone who has more 02 than they actually need."

"It'd help if we could buy some scuba tanks," Jamie suggested.

Michael frowned. "What about materials? You know rocketships have to be asbestos covered titanium and aluminum. You make something out of wood and it'll burn to a crisp in the atmosphere."

"That only happens when you go straight up or down really fast," Gertie said. "If you put a shuttle on the back of a plane..."

My brother only responded with a look like he'd developed a headache.

"We've made something that acts like a shield," I said.

"Yeah? What if the shield breaks? Ever think of that? Then you gotta think about _food, water, and how you're going to go to the toilet..._ "

 _"We're working on it,"_ I said.

Mike blew a raspberry. "Look, Elliott. If you're going into space, you need to make serious plans. Air and necessities for the entire length of your journey, _waste disposal systems, fire systems, sleeping arrangements..."_

"Okay, okay," Jamie said. "You're right. So we're not ready to fly all the way across the galaxy. The Wright Brothers had to test things out before they got their big plane off the ground. _But we're on to something_. This thing moves _fast_. I bet we could fly it around the world in a couple minutes. We might even have the Concorde beat."

"Yeah? So what happens if you hit a bird? Or an asteroid, for that matter?"

 _"So we need a metal frame..."_ I said. _"And someone who knows how to weld._ "

Mike must have noticed the look on my face, for then he muttered, " _Me and my big mouth._ "

We didn't immediately get to work on our project because we had school, and I still needed to find the parts. Michael left for the high school, Gertie for the neighboring lower grade building, I and Jamie heading up the steps to the middle school.

Halfway to the door, Jamie kissed me right on the mouth. I flailed my arms, pulling away quickly. "Oh my God! _Right in front of the school!_ "

Jamie grinned. "See you in class."

I got some stares when I came in the building.

I'd only gotten halfway to my first hour class before the school bully shoved me into a locker. I shrank from him, expecting the worst.

"Relax, wimp. I'm not going to beat you. I want to ask you something."

Jimmy reached into his jacket, taking out a page he'd ripped from the _Weekly World News_. "I've been reading an interesting story about a _space man. Mind if I check something real quick?"_

Before I could say no, he took my glasses and grabbed my face, holding the paper beside my head for a comparison.

He turned my head to the side. _"Your real name's Elliott, isn't it?"_

I swallowed hard. "What do you want?"

He slammed my head against a locker door, talking through his teeth. _"I want you to friggin' admit you're the guy in the article!"_

The color in my face drained away. "Let me see what you're talking about."

He held up the rumpled newsprint page, showing me my picture, paired with an artist's sketch of a generic bug eyed saucer alien. " _See?_ Now fess up! _Is that you or not?"._


	13. Chapter 13: Thunder Road

Jimmy held out my glasses, then snatched them back as I tried to grab them. _"These aren't even real. They look like costume props."_

"You're wrong! I'm really nearsighted! _Those are prescription glasses!_ Give them back!"

He pocketed them, waved the tabloid picture in front of me again. _"Are you sure this isn't jogging your memory? Even a little?"_

"I can't see without my glasses."

 _"You're nearsighted, not blind!"_

"No," I stammered. "It's not me. Please let me go."

Jimmy grabbed me around the throat. "You know what, kid? _You really suck at lying. You're not even looking at me!_ "

"I wouldn't look directly at a mad gorilla, either," I muttered.

Jimmy's hands tightened around my throat. _"What's that, Wolfie?_ "

"Nothing! I'm sorry!"

Jimmy snarled, pressing my head against the cold metal door. _"Look me in the eyes and tell me you're not that Elliott kid!"_

"Okay, okay! It's me!" I gasped. "I'm Elliott! What do you want!"

He let go of me with a laugh. _"Thought I recognized you! You know there's a reward out for you? They say your father is a kidnapper!"_

"The _government_ kidnapped me," I sighed. "If you tell anyone, they're not going to take me back to mom."

Jimmy smirked. "Is that what _he_ told you?"

"No. I _was_ kidnapped by the government. Dad broke me out of an army base."

He laughed. _"That's awesome!"_

I slumped against the locker. "You're going to tell someone, aren't you?"

"No way! _I don't care about that reward!"_ He put an arm around my shoulder, whispering conspiratorially. "Did he probe you? The alien?"

I shook my head.

"What did he look like? Is he really like the picture?"

"No." Since I knew he'd ask anyway, I took out a drawing I had in my notebook. "He looks like _that._ "

Jimmy chuckled. _"He looks like an old geezer!"_

I shrugged. " _So it's not much of a picture._ The point is, he doesn't look like the picture you showed me."

 _"I wanna hear more. Tell me everything!"_

"Why? So you can tell the newspapers? What?"

He pressed his hand against the locker, leaning over me. " _You've just become the most interesting kid in school_. _I thought you'd like not getting pounded."_

"I'd rather get pounded than go back to that place!"

Jimmy put the glasses back on my nose. "Did your alien teach you the secrets of the universe? Like how to use the force?"

I shook my head. "Nothing that special. At least not anymore."

He raised an eyebrow. " _But you did?_ "

I reddened. _"Kinda."_

 _"So what did you do?"_

The bell rang.

 _"We're not done,"_ Jimmy said. "Meet me on the playground during lunch."

In science class, my girlfriend passed me another note. The teacher intercepted it, just like before, but this time he just rolled his eyes and laughed. " _Pay attention._ "

I didn't get to see the note until the end of class, and when I did, the only thing I saw were a bunch of nonsense mathematical symbols arranged in a heart shape, with my name in the middle.

Jamie blew me a kiss and went on to her next class before I could tell her anything about my aggressive new `friend.'

I met the guy at the tetherball pole during lunch hour, as promised. He offered me a cigarette, but I declined.

I stared as he lit up. "You're going to get in trouble."

 _"I'm always in trouble."_ He took a drag. "So what was that note you were passing around in science the other day? Was it really a bomb? Or were you making drugs?"

I shook my head. "Neither." I showed him the love note.

Jimmy frowned. "I...kinda don't think this is what you were getting all those weird compliments on before."

He shook the ashes from the cigarette. He thought he looked cool. "What was it then? I _know_ it wasn't a game. I've been looking around hobby shops ever since those church guys started burning game manuals."

"Look," I stammered. "You can't tell anyone about this. Even my dad doesn't know what I'm doing."

Jimmy grinned. "Oh man! Now you've _got_ to tell me!"

I swallowed. "It's... _rocket fuel_ , all right? We're building a _spaceship._ "

He laughed. "I'm guessing it's some special kind of rocket fuel, because if you amass too much of the other kind, someone's bound to notice."

I nodded.

"I got an Atari," he said proudly. "And a whole bunch of games. Have you tried _Montezuma's Revenge?_ "

"Isn't that when you get the squirts?"

"That's the same thing I thought. But it's a cool game. You want to come over and play?"

"You mean right now?"

"No, dummy! After school!"

I _really really_ didn't want to hang out with him. "Um, _that's okay..._ "

"What? You got other plans or something?"

I fumbled for an answer.

"That's right! _You're building a spaceship! Who needs an Atari?_ "

I gave him a slight nod.

"Hey, _let me help_! I'm really good with building stuff, and finding equipment."

I stared at him with skepticism. "Can you find me large quantities of aluminum and titanium?"

He frowned at me. _"I know where you can get some roller coaster parts. Would that work?"_

I grabbed a quick bite in the lunch room, hustled off to social studies.

Sometimes in life, you meet two people who have very similar names, and when you're just talking about them, the people listening to your story can get the two mixed up. To make things less confusing to you the reader, from now on I will refer to Jamie as Lori.

"Hey Elliott! Wait up!" I heard Jimmy calling to me as I was leaving school for the day.

"It's Wolfgang!" I hissed. "You want me to get taken away?"

Lori goggled at me. "Wait, _are you actually talking to him?"_

I didn't need to say anything. She knew the answer was yes.

"Isn't he that the same guy who beat you up?"

I gave her a pained look. "Apparently I'm in the tabloids."

Jimmy grinned at my girlfriend. "Hey, you're that chick that kicked my ass!"

"You want me to kick it again?" she said. "Go away!"

Jimmy didn't. "Is she your sister or your girlfriend? _`Cuz I've heard it both ways._ "

I was going to be honest, and started saying "Well, she _is_ kinda my friend..." But Lori finished with "We're cousins."

She was staring at me again. "So, what, you're just going to let him and his buddies in on the secret? They'll blab and tell the whole school!"

"What, hey," Jimmy protested. "No one's telling anything. The guys don't even believe the story from the paper is true. _Bruce_ doesn't even think there _can_ be life on other planets. He calls it a ` _nerd thing.'_ "

Lori looked nervous. "We can't just show him the machine! _He'll think it's a ride!_ He'll start charging admission, and _having the whole school line up for a turn_ until your battery dies!...Or those government types show up!"

 _"I get it!"_ Jimmy groaned. " _You want to keep a low profile!_ I blab and you go away forever. No spaceship, no space man. Don't worry, I won't talk!"

Lori put her hands on her hips, sighing in frustration.

"He promised not to tell anyone. He just wants in."

"In?" she said incredulously. "You're making it sound like-"

"I know, I know! But what can we do?"

 _"So he's just going to hang around us while we work?"_

I shrugged. _"He said he knows where to get supplies."_

"I trust him," Gertie said.

Lori paused in thought for a long time. At last she said, "Can he get us some _O2?_ "

It turns out he actually _did_ know a few things about that.

Jimmy lived in a mobile home on the other side of the railroad tracks, you know, the lower income area.

I was shocked to find a little black girl thanking him for getting her doll out of a tree, _and_ fixing the training wheels on her bike. Apparently he did other things besides pounding on classmates.

His trailer was...well...not great. Ugly beige and green, wheels taken off, shoddy concrete job on the porch. We kept our opinions to ourselves.

In addition to _Montezuma's Revenge_ , Jimmy introduced us to some of his hobbies, throwing biscuit dough and eggs at passing cars, mocking passerby with a microphone and speaker system.

 _"Real mature!"_ Lori said.

The demonstrations ended when Jimmy hit a convertible, and the driver got out and yelled at him.

Jimmy's dad owned some military surplus gas masks with air tanks. He also had an air compressor, the kind you use for nail guns and spray paint. "You can pump up a tire with it," he explained. "So I don't see why it won't work for other stuff. The only problem is you'll maybe get an hour of air out of these masks."

"We're going to need more than that," my girlfriend said.

"Relax, Lori! I'll get you a scuba tank and some 02 later. I just need to talk with grandma."

"She...doesn't... _need the air_ , does she?"

"No way. It was just a temp deal, and now she says they won't take the tanks back." He laughed. "She still goes bowling and she's seventy four. Dad wonders sometimes if she's healthier than he is...I'm going to have a harder time explaining why I'm borrowing her _Depend-O's._ "

I frowned, not believing what I was hearing. "Excuse me?"

 _"You're going all the way to Mars or something, right?_ I'm assuming that's why you need the air... _You'll eventually have to take a whiz. It doesn't take a brain to figure that one out. Unless you want to hold it all the way..._ "

He brought out an old vacuum cleaner. "Hey, maybe we could use this with a funnel or something, too, you know, _make an actual toilet_. Might make it less _rank_. Of course, _you'll be ejecting air..._ "

"You know how we can get metal?" Lori asked.

Being a smartass, he showed her an Iron Maiden LP.

Lori actually looked _angry_. I think she thought he was lying about the supplies. " _Seriously?_ "

"What. _It's metal._ "

She crossed her arms indignantly.

"Gee, lighten up!" he groaned. "I'll get you the aluminum, but the place is super busy right now. We'll have to wait until closing time."

"That sounds... _sketchy._ "

"Hey, you want the supplies or not?...Now, since I've helped you and all, _when do I get to see this invention of yours?_ "

Okay, so fair was fair. We took him to the cabin so we could get the equipment.

Jimmy whistled. _"Nice place!"_

I rolled my eyes. "You're kidding."

"Hey, _you saw mine..._ "

 _"Thanks,"_ I mumbled.

When Jimmy showed up at the door, Dad was puzzled at seeing him in our company. "Wait, isn't he the kid who beat you up at school?"

"Um," I stammered.

He frowned. _"Yeah! That's the same boy!_ What's he doing here/"

 _"He's forgiven me,"_ Jimmy said. _'He's a better man than I am."_

 _"Better man!"_ Dad chuckled, shaking his head in belief. _"Okay!"_

Dad asked some probing questions, but Jimmy kind of talked his way around the facts so we didn't get in trouble, distracting him with a conversation about his 49ers shirt, so we didn't get in trouble.

"I thought you said you had rocket fuel," Jimmy said as he stared at the equipment we had set up in the woods.

"I just said that because I didn't trust you," I muttered. "This is better than any rocket fuel you could make."

I know, it wasn't the smartest thing to do, but I volunteered to be the next guinea pig, you know, because Gertie had been such a sport about it.

The problem was that Jimmy started playing with the computer when Lori was attempting to maneuver me safely through the trees. I ended up slamming against objects. Jimmy thought it was hilarious, but I didn't laugh about it until I was out of the bubble with my gas mask off.

When my legs stopped shaking, and I noticed I hadn't felt a single one of those violent impacts, I actually giggled. "That... _was..._ kinda fun!"

It seemed my brother had gotten home early from work, for while I had been flying around hitting objects, I noticed Gertie leading him down to the site, and I had an audience. Michael hadn't been too wild about what Jimmy was doing either. "Hey, don't do that, you'll kill him!" I heard him saying more than once.

Not wanting to get grounded, we took a break from our experiments and went home for homework and supper. Of course, we still wanted those supplies, so we also promised Jimmy we'd sneak out in the dead of night to do _`equipment shopping.'_

I was familiar with the junkyard. There were only two in town, and I and Dad dropped by at odd times to get parts for projects.

What I wasn't familiar with was sneaking up the back with the barking dog.

"This seems kinda illegal," I said as we climbed the fence.

"Shut up!" Jimmy hissed. "You want the equipment or not!"

A big headed pit bull came out from behind a trash can and barked at us. Jimmy gave it a hamburger laced with sleeping pills.

Jimmy _did_ find us some interesting scrap, construction materials, metal chairs...I asked about car parts, but he suddenly gained a conscience when I tried to take a hood or a fender. We hefted quite a few items over the fence.

The best piece we found was an old Tilt-A-Whirl car. Jimmy said it had been sitting in the junk pile gathering rust since the State Fair ten years ago. Apparently it was broken and unsafe to put back in a ride, and nobody wanted to buy it. He heard they'd called an electronic billboard service and tried posting an ad, but nobody seemed to want it there either. The shipping costs were too high.

"It sounds like you were actually trying to sell the thing yourself," Lori remarked, but Jimmy only replied, "Just help me with this thing, okay?"

The Tilt-A-Whirl car was too heavy. We had to push it along with its castor wheels and a dolly, which made huge amounts of noise.

The dog woke up, went on a barking frenzy, and then a gnarled, weathered looking man in flannel and overalls came rushing out of the office, yelling at us. "James Francine Myers! Where in the hell are you going with that!"

"Building a treehouse!" Jimmy hollered back.

"It's two A.M. on a school night!... _Not like anything like that's mattered to you before!_ "

 _"You think I'm actually going to go to bed with the chickens so I can learn a bunch of Con-Ag bullcrap?_ You're out of your mind!"

"The Future Farmers ain't nothing to sniff at, boy! You think I want to be here selling junk? One of these days, you're going to look back at all this goofing off and ask yourself if it's worth it! By that time it'll be too late to do anything about it!"

"Screw you, old man!"

"What's that? You want some more belt action? I can give it to you!"

Lori stared at them. _"That's his dad?"_

I frowned. "I...I kinda thought I saw Jimmy hanging around here before..."

"Why'd the dog get so upset?"

 _"He teases it,"_ Gertie said.

The man rushed out and grabbed Jimmy by the scruff of the neck. " _What other shit did you steal from me this time? Fess up!_ "

"Nothing!" Jimmy stammered. "Just the Tilt-A-Whirl! That's it! I swear!"

 _"Don't lie to me, boy! What I hate more than anything else is a liar!_ I _know_ you've been sneaking around my back! _What else did you steal_ , you little punk?"

"Hey, _screw you!_ I ain't telling!"

The man's grip tightened. _"I'm fed up with all your disrespect and belligerence, you little cretin. Fed up to here!_ "

"Hey! Let go!"

He didn't let go. He hit him with his belt, then beat the kid with his fists. Jimmy cried and screamed in pain.

"Keep yelling like that and someone's going to call Child Services on me. You want that? Huh?" The man was talking through his teeth now. _"They'll take you away from me, send you to live with some_ fat greasy black mamadown in the ghetto! _You want that, Jimmy? Huh? Do you!_ "

Jimmy shook his head violently. "No sir!"

And so he let his father pound him.

Me and Lori didn't know what to do. We just watched it happen. I mean, after what Jimmy did to me in school, I kinda felt he deserved it, and even the part of me that felt sorry for him didn't want to get involved in a family quarrel. His dad _was_ trying to discipline him. It would be like Jimmy coming over and trying to stop _my dad_ from spanking Gertie. If this _was_ child abuse, who was _I_ to step in and do anything about it? Deep down, Jimmy still presumably loved his father, right?

Still, Gertie was crying.

Actually, I think Gertie was the main reason why the beating stopped.

"You kids go home!" the man yelled. "And Jimmy, if I _ever_ catch you sneaking around in my junkyard and taking things without asking again, you're going to _wish_ I only beat you like I did today!"

Then, with a dismissive wave to our acquisition, he muttered, "You can get that eyesore out of my junkyard. I'm not even sure it's good for melting." He picked up a whiskey bottle from a garden chair, stomping back into his office.

Looking very sad and sympathetic, Gertie touched Jimmy and said, " _You're hurting..._ "

Her hand started glowing.

Jimmy laughed. "Hey! What...?" A moment later, he was leaning into it, and looking a _lot_ less miserable. In fact, the sight kind of reminded me of a cat stretched out in a sun beam. " _Woww_...that's _amazing!_ _Kid, you could put massage parlors out of business (Man, it's like he never even touched me)!_ "

I stared at my sister in disbelief, maybe some jealousy at the amount of power she still retained... _And_ annoyance at the fact she'd gone out of her way to help my enemy.

Gertie just looked at me like I were crazy. "What."

So...Jimmy's `old man' really did have no use for that Tilt-A-Whirl after all. We collected all the parts together and moved them to our testing site in the woods.

As we approached our cabin from the rear to climb in the windows, we found Dad standing in our path with his arms crossed. "You'd better have a good explanation for all of this."

I just ran up to him and gave him a hug.

"Whoa!" Dad laughed. _"What's this about?"_

I fumbled for words. "I...I'm glad to have a dad like you."

He chortled through his nose. " _You trying to butter me up_? You must have gotten into _some trouble..."_

"Jimmy's father is mean," Gertie blurted.

Dad only sighed, rubbing my head.

 _"I changed my whole life on account of you kids,"_ Dad scolded us when we got inside. " _I had to give up_ everything! _Every damn day_ I live in fear of someone breaking in and taking you away from me." He glanced uncomfortably at the ceiling. _"Or abducting you._ Did you _seriously_ think I was dumb enough not to notice when my own children disappeared in the middle of the night?"

"I'm sorry," I stammered.

We more or less explained what we were doing sneaking around. He ordered us to bed.

Lori stayed in Gertie's room all night, so Gertie had nothing to report to Dad.

School time came before any of us were ready for it.

"Kids," Dad told us at breakfast. "Today you're going to learn the importance of coffee." You know, because it's not something kids ordinarily drink.

I and Lori didn't care for the taste, even with cream and sugar, but Gertie asked for a second cup.

"Whoa, there, squirt!" Dad laughed. "Give you too much of that stuff and your teacher is going to call me out of work from you bouncing off the walls!"

After eating in silence for a few moments, Dad looked at me and said, _"So you ran into Chuck."_

I shrugged. "That's the guy's name?"

Dad nodded. "Saw his kid once or twice down there. Funny I didn't put two and two together. Guess I got a lot on my mind. _The guy's an alcoholic_. I suppose you didn't go inside the main office to smell it on his breath. I think he sleeps up there so he can drink without his wife saying anything...you didn't see the mother at all?"

I shook my head.

 _"Funny._ Maybe she's pulling double shifts somewhere. I know she _does_ work at the bar..." He cast Lori and accusatory look, making her shrink in her chair.

"What were you guys doing outside all night?" Michael asked as he walked us to school. _"Dad was going crazy!"_

We told him about our little adventure in the junkyard.

"We have _supplies_ now!" Gertie exclaimed with caffeinated jittery excitement. "It's all in the forest at our special testing site! _We can finally build our spaceship!"_

"All right, but don't let your school work suffer. Dad will kill me!...If you're still this excited about it after school, I might even drop by and see how I can help."

He gave me a strange thoughtful look, but didn't say what it was about.

"Hey! Lori!" Jimmy called when we approached the front steps of the school.

Lori stared at him. I could tell she was a little annoyed, probably thought he was being extra friendly because of our great invention or something. "Uh...hi?"

Jimmy cast me a sideways glance, then started stammering, red faced. "Uh, hey. Um, you know, I've been thinking a lot...about you recently, and, well, you're really cool, I mean, _you're a genius_ , you've got a great family, you kicked my butt the other day, _because you're a badass_ , and the fact you've met an actual space alien is awesome..."

Lori rolled her eyes. "Jimmy, what..."

He kept going. "I... _like how you look, you're really pretty_. I... _you wanna go out sometime?_ "

Lori's face turned a bright red. She shot me this look like _I_ should have said all those nice things to her, but then told him, I'm sorry, I'm taken."

Jimmy frowned. _"That's your cousin."_

"Actually, _he's not_. _He's my boyfriend_. I ran away from home because of him, and we're both hiding from the authorities. That's why I pretended to be part of his family."

"You're kidding."

Both I and Lori slowly shook our heads.

 _"So when were you going to tell me that?"_

Lori shrugged. "I didn't know you thought that way about me."

Jimmy sighed. He looked crushed.

"Hey, we can still be friends, right?"

He wasn't too thrilled by that. _"Yeah..."_ Then he scowled at me, looking jealous. "See you at lunch."

He marched into the building.

I gave Lori a bashful smile. "He's right. You _are_ smart, and pretty, and...kick ass."

She giggled. "And you're still the most interesting boy I've ever met."

In science class, I began to wish I _had_ actually drank my coffee. I had my head on my desk before I knew what was happening. It was a good dream, too. Our spaceship had been completed, glistening, cherry red, it stood shiny and glistening in front of the classroom, the teacher praising me on what a great invention it was.

I suddenly felt a hand on my shoulder. " _Mister Mueller_! What amino acids are required for biosynthesis in a human being?"

"Uh..." I stammered. "Vitamin B?"

 _"It's B5, Mr. Mueller._ " Mr. Sigler rolled his eyes. "Okay, so you got the _pantothenate.._.What are the other two?"

I frowned. "I...I don't know."

The teacher sighed. "The correct answer is _cysteine, pantothenate and adenosine triphosphate. Do your sleeping at home, Mr. Mueller. You're smart, but it's clear you're not quite at Nobel Laureate level just yet. I can help you if you just listen occasionally."_ He scowled at Lori. " _The same goes for you, Sleeping Beauty!_ "

Sigler leaned over the desk. "Was there a late night monster movie on TV last night or something?"

I shook my head, then nodded when I realized how good an alibi it was. "Could I have some coffee?"

My classmates tittered.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Mueller. This is not a cafe. If I gave you a cup, _everyone_ would want one. If this continues to be a problem, perhaps you could bring along a _thermos._ "

I struggled to stay awake the best I could.

At the end of class, I caught Lori at the door and quipped, "See you later, _Sleeping Beauty._ "

She gave me a jab. "Okay, _Prince Sleepyhead._ "

Throughout English and Social studies, I fought to keep awake, sitting straight in my chair, taking notes...It kinda worked, but when I re-read my handwriting, it looked like I'd scrawled something about Czar Nicholas being a blueberry.

Lori's schedule had changed, so she didn't eat with me that day, she ate a half hour before me. I saw her leaving when I came in. At the cafeteria line, the cook stared at me when I asked for coffee, but she actually brought me a cup.

The moment I sat down with my food, Jimmy put his backpack down on the table, unzipped it, and out fell a pair of car headlights. " _Thought you could use these_. I mean, it's going to be dark sometime, right?"

I stared. "Do you ever carry actual books in that bag?"

He snorted. _"What do I look like, a nerd?..._ Anyways, it turns out grandma _does_ own a scuba tank. I just called her. And _get this_. She's _actually glad_ to hear we're doing something with her O2. She says _she breathes just fine on her own, `All they're doing is sitting around gathering dust.'_ I guess she tried to send them back once, but there was some problem and they never came to pick them up."

I went on to class.

Ms. Horne thought my fiction writing was hilarious. I guess it was, and probably wasn't that great, either. Since I hesitated to write about ET, I gave her fantasy stories that vaguely resembled my life, _with a dragon_. She commented that my "Realistic piece" she asked me to do, you know the one where you can't include any fantasy elements, _was actually less believable than that one_ , because the mom and dad stayed together at the end.

In the class after that, I found out the school had been given some new `toys', computers that gave educational tests about weather and rainforests and things, video painting programs, typing tutors that looked like video games, and a program you could use to control little machines made out of Legos. Neat stuff, but it didn't compare to my flying device. I quickly lost interest and found myself watching the clock.

At last, school let out, and I was hurrying to meet with Lori and pick up my sister.

"Lori!"

I watched, with some chagrin, as Jimmy rushed up to my girlfriend, kissing her on the mouth.

What followed was a surprise to all three of us.

I saw something like a spark erupt from the point where their lips touched, and then Jimmy was on the ground, and there he lay for an entire minute.

"Oh my God!" Lori cried, kneeling next to him. "What just happened?"

Jimmy groaned and sat up, rubbing his head. "Feels like I just grabbed hold of an electric fence! _What did you do?_ "

"Me!" she cried indignantly. " _You're_ the one that was acting..." she blushed. " _Disrespectful!_ "

I furrowed my brow. _"I saw a spark."_

Her blush deepened. " _That was not a spark!_ I...I was... _just thinking about jellyfish and electric eels...and how nice it would be to have that kind of defense mechanism, and..."_ She put a hand to her mouth in horror. _"I did that?"_

The looks on me and Jimmy's faces answered the question.

Jimmy's eyes bugged out. _"Gee, I'm glad I only tried to kiss you!"_

She helped him to his feet. "Next time, ask me first."

He swallowed. "Yes, ma'am." He did a double take. "You mean you'd actually do it?"

I gave Lori an uncomfortable look, but she only shrugged. "I don't know. _You kinda started on the wrong foot._ "

Despite the awkward social situation, we still had great enthusiasm for our little science project. We practically ran down to the clearing to make sure the equipment and everything was where we left it.

I came to the crest of the hill and froze. _Someone had beaten us there._

It was a teenaged African American woman, curvy, but the plumpness was attractive - you could tell she took care of herself and exercised.

She leaned over the Tilt-A-Whirl car, clad in overalls, protective face shield and gloves, welding on pieces of aluminum.

Noticing us approaching, she shut off the torch, flipped back the welding mask.

The young woman had aquiline features, dark, slicked back hair braided like cables. Overall, kind of attractive for someone way older than me.

 _And she could weld!_ I stared with my mouth hanging open.

 _"Michael said you guys needed help."_

"Hey!" Jimmy shouted. _"That's our stuff! What's the big idea!"_

"Cook it," I said, marching up to the stranger. " _You're Michael's girlfriend, aren't you?_ "

The young woman's protruding beak-like lips curled in a smile. "The name's _Timmashay_ , little man!"

Jimmy gawked at her. " _That's_ your brother's girlfriend?"

Sensing a bit of disapproval in his tone, I just gave him a questioning look, like `What?'

He raised his hands defensively, as if to say `No, no, it's cool!'

Timmashay laughed. "He hasn't told you yet, but sometimes brother comes home with a big smile on his face. _Wonder what that's about!_ "

I examined her handiwork in dismay. In my absence, Timmashay had welded the pieces of aluminum scrap and parts of a Fiat shell to the Tilt-A-Whirl car.

A ghastly 1970 puke green 850 Sports Coupe with rust spots. It looked really ugly, especially with the addition of the clothes drier doors we were using for side windows, and the chrome trash cans.

She stared down her hooked nose at my disapproving expression. "I skipped school to work on this for you kids. _Say thank you._ "

"Thank you," I stammered.

"Some guy was selling a car for a hundred dollars. _Drove for a block before it stalled_. Folks looked at me like I was crazy when they saw me pushing it into the woods, but hey, _it's my car._ Don't even have to pay the insurance."

She welded a door to the frame. " _Fix It Again Tony_. That's what they say Fiat stands for."

I scowled at the inelegant design. "I had _plans_ for what it was supposed to look like."

Timmashay pulled a wad of folded papers out of her chest pocket. _My drawings_. " _These, you mean?_ _Sorry, not happening_. There's limits to my magic. _You're going to be lucky if it's round!_ "

"Could it have killed you to at least get a Spider?" Jimmy complained.

The young woman just glared at him. _"You get what you get, little boy."_

"Why don't we just _use_ the Fiat?" he asked. "It's got a _frame_ and everything!"

Timmashay rolled her eyes, put her hands on her hips. " _What do I look like,_ Wonder Woman? I was lucky to get it _near_ your little hiding spot! It was a workout just to get the parts down here!" Besides, _car engines and tires weigh a ton,_ and we don't need them, right?"

"Right," I reluctantly muttered.

 _"We could cut the frame off and carry it down here,"_ Lori suggested. _"Might add strength to the shell."_

 _"Now that's thinking!"_ Timmashay agreed.

We all worked together on our little spaceship, grabbing parts from the Fiat, carrying them to the site, holding things in place as Timmashay welded. When Michael got off work, things sped up a little.

Unfortunately, it soon got dark, and we were supposed to go home.

 _"We're so close!"_ I moaned as I admired our handiwork. "A couple more hours and we can actually get the thing in the air for a test run!"

"Me and Timmashay will finish up," Mike said. "I'm used to late nights. You guys get to bed."

I gave him a questioning look.

"Hey, most of it's already put together. There really won't be much to do after this."

"No way!" Jimmy cried. _"We're this close!"_

My brother frowned, put his arm around his girlfriend. _"We got this."_

"Yeah? Who's to say you and Timmy here won't just make out all night?"

Timmashay giggled. "The thought _had_ crossed my mind!"

"Stop," Michael scolded. "I mean, _as much as I'd like to_..."

His girlfriend looked annoyed. " _I know._..I've _got_ to see this thing when it's actually working."

"Jimmy's probably not going to go home," I said.

My brother sighed. "Fine. I'll talk it over with dad."

I opened my mouth to protest, but he just said, " _You know he's not going to let you just sneak out like you did last night._ "

"Just tell him we're building a treehouse, or working on a car."

 _"Tell him the truth!"_ Gertie cried.

Michael left us, and we worked some more. When he returned, he had a tray of sandwiches and a couple thermoses in his hands. "Dad says you'd better be keeping up with your school work."

We finished well after midnight.

Our contraption turned out larger than we originally planned. I could see it maybe fitting three kids and two adults, if the adults didn't stand up, and they at close together.

"What should we call it?" Lori asked me.

"I dunno. It's just a test model... _Prototype One?_ "

"That name sucks," Jimmy said. "Let's call it... _Thunder Road._ "

We all stared at him.

"You know... _like the Bruce Springsteen song?_ "

"I like it," Gertie said.

As we stared at our badly cobbled together vehicle, we debated painting the thing.

"It'll look pretty!" Gertie said.

I just scrunched my face. "Don't be ridiculous. We don't even know if it'll hold together. The Wright Brothers never painted their projects, because they constantly had to throw stuff out and start over."

"Yeah," Mike grumbled. "We've put enough work into it already!"

Gertie was tired, and pouty. She looked like she were going to cry. " _But I want it painted! You always treat me like such a baby!"_

Lori hugged her and patted her back. "C'mon, we can always paint it later when we know it works. Right now we need to test it out. We still don't know if it's going to hold together...Tell you what: How would you like to be the test pilot?"

Gertie gave me a nervous smile. "Come with me."

"What about me?" Jimmy asked. "I want to go too."

He provided the materials and the O2, so I thought he deserved a test drive.

We'd done pretty well with the setup. Everything was sealed tight as a drum with caulking, tar and solder, we had a windshield, overhead lights for us to see the instruments and books, a fire extinguisher, heater, seats from the Fiat (not the most comfortable things-you couldn't stretch your legs-we'd basically welded them to the floor to give us extra room). The headlights worked, we even engineered an opening in the shield bubble and used the exhaust fan from the vacuum cleaner/prototype toilet to pump air into the cabin for our test flights - layers of coffee filters kept the dust out, we'd have to remove them later. The rear seat was a huge office chair that had lost its swivel base.

The only thing we hadn't done was put the engine inside the vehicle. That particular item was too valuable to just slap down into any hastily assembled space raft. Our dashboard looked like an entertainment center with the TV missing. Lori literally had `Ground Control'.

When she switched the machine on, our vehicle rattled and groaned, acting like it intended to shake apart, but the welds kept securely in place, and through the Italian made windshield I could see the ground recede beneath us.

The Thunder Road rose higher, at level with the tops of trees. We giddily stared down at our controller, cheering and giving her the thumbs up.

A moment later, Dad came stomping into the clearing.

He looked up and just froze, staring open mouthed at us for an entire minute.

 _"Mother Mary and Joseph."_

The awe and mystery only distracted Dad for a moment. He was soon looking over his shoulder like a frightened rabbit, rushing to our control station. _"Shut it down! Get them back here and turn it off now!"_

Lori's hands rushed across the controls, but I guess she wasn't moving fast enough, for then Dad was unplugging the power supply.

I, my sister and Jimmy screamed as our ship came hurtling back towards the earth.

I reflected, while the ground rushed up to us, that it might have been a good idea to install some sort of airbag or crash protection system.

Of course, these plans wouldn't mean very much if I ended up dead or in the hospital, especially if going to the hospital meant being taken away in a black van.

Due to the way the craft had been designed, I couldn't see below me, only out the front. That probably wouldn't prevent the floor from breaking up and impaling me, or my bones from shattering on the hard ground.

Jimmy mashed down the button on the walkie-talkie, yelling into the receiver. "Lori! For God's sake, plug it back in!"

"It's too late!" she shouted back. "We've lost your position!"

As an unconscious reflex, I tried to stall our descent by stomping the floor like Fred Flintstone.

All of a sudden, _everything did_ stop, and I experienced weightlessness.

Noticing a glow, I stared at my sister.

Her eyes had rolled back in her head, her hands illuminated like she had light bulbs under her skin.

And then I noticed my own hands glowing. Blood trickled out my nose.

A second later, gravity returned, and the Thunder Road thumped down on the soil as gently as Dorothy's house in _The Wizard of Oz_ , walls and overall structure still whole and intact (Seriously, how does a tornado drop your house without smashing it and you in the process?).

Gertie fainted.

Dad yelled at us the moment the ship's car doors came open. "Jesus! What are you, insane? Someone could have died flying around in this thing! I almost had a heart attack!"

 _"What were you doing unplugging it, you ass!"_ Jimmy yelled. " _You're the reason why_ we almost died!"

Dad's face turned scarlet. I could tell he knew Jimmy was right, he was just too angry to admit it. "Get your butts out of that death trap right now! I'm grounding you from science for the next week!...And this thing is going to the scrap yard where it belongs!"

"Over my dead body!" Timmashay yelled behind him. _"Do you know how long I've been busting my ass on this thing?"_

'She's right, dad," Michael said. "We've worked some long hours on this."

Dad sighed through his nose, leaned on the door frame.

And that's when he took a closer look at my sister. "Oh my God! What's wrong with Gertie!"

We quickly carried her out of the vehicle, laying her on the ground to get a better look.

Dad shined a flashlight up and down her, checking for injuries. "What happened, tyke?"

Gertie groaned, wiping her bloody nose. "I got scared and had to do something. I felt power go out of me, then I got really sleepy. I'm sorry I scared you. I wanna go to bed."

Smiling tenderly, Dad hefted her into his arms.

"We don't have to fly to his planet," my sister mumbled to me. "There's some of his friends close by."

"How close?" I asked, but by then she wouldn't wake up for anything. She sure looked happy, though.

"I wonder what she meant by that," Lori said. "I mean, if they're just up there, hanging out, _we could hitch a ride..._ "

"Yeah!" I stared at her, excitement rising in my voice. "They could have the supplies we need and everything!"

Dad sighed. _"Are you really that eager to ditch your old man?"_


	14. Chapter 14: Ascent

"Dad," I said. "We don't have to leave you. I mean, there's _room_ in the Thunder Road..."

He chuckled. " _Bruce Springsteen..._ "

"Yeah. The point is, you could come with us."

 _"In that bucket of bolts?_ You have _got_ to be kidding!"

 _"Then you're leaving us,_ because I offered."

Dad frowned. "I'll think about it."

After pulling an all nighter like that, we all had to dose ourselves with caffeine when we got up, even if we didn't care for the taste.

Dad put his hand on my sister's forehead, checking her temperature. "You okay, sweetie?"

She nodded. "Um hum."

 _"Last night you passed out. Had a nosebleed."_

"It's okay. I was just making things float, and it made me tired."

He still looked worried, but gave her a slight smile.

I could tell Dad wanted to say something to us, but it took awhile before it actually came out. "I...may have overreacted last night."

I gave him a look that said, _`Gee, you think?'_ But kept quiet, eating my cereal.

"You see, I was afraid that someone would see you, maybe report their little UFO sighting to the authorities. He kind of pissed me off saying it, but your friend was right. I put you all in danger trying to shut down your little machine...and I'm sorry. _This is all to say you're not grounded_. And I'll let you keep your... _flying thing_."

Me, Lori and Gertie grinned at each other.

"That being said, there's going to be some _rules_. I don't want you flying that thing where anyone can see it. Keep the lights off, stay in the forest, below the treeline, away from houses, and fly only at night. Actually, _the next thing you take the thing out, I want to supervise the operation. Got me?_ From now on, no unauthorized flights."

"Yes sir," I said.

Lori and Gertie also agreed to the terms.

He frowned. "Elliott, Lori, you sure you can trust this... _Jimmy_ kid with your little project?"

"Gertie trusts him," I sighed. "She has a good sense for these things."

"I feel bad for him," Lori said. "I think he fights people because he has it rough at home."

"How did he get involved with you guys anyway?"

Lori gave me an uncomfortable look. "Apparently there's some truth to the tabloids, and Jimmy reads them."

Dad looked unsettled, but said nothing more on the subject.

"Daddy," Gertie said. "You saw the spaceship last night. You've got to believe I'm an astronaut now. I _actually did_ fly a couple days ago. _It wasn't just pretend. You believe me now, don't you, daddy?_ "

He sighed. "Sweetie, I know you're excited, but what you're doing is very dangerous."

"That's why we're testing it. We tried it on Mister Squirrel, then me without the...thing..."

Dad stared at me in horror. " _You flew your sister around with that toy? Without even a damn parachute?_ "

I shrugged. " _She begged me_. She was about to cry."

 _"And you just let her_." Dad clenched his fists. " _Elliott, you've got to start learning how to do what's best for kids younger than yourself. One of these days you're going to be a parent, and you'll need to occasionally say no or they'll do something and hurt themselves_. Thank God nothing happened!"

I and Lori looked at each other in discomfort.

He got up from the table, staring out the window. After some slow breathing exercises, he returned to his seat, rubbing his red face in frustration. "I _really should_ ground you for putting your sister in danger, but I won't because I did the same damn thing trying to stop you."

Gertie made the same suggestion I made to him last night. "Daddy, you should come to Jufuceri with us. You only have to sit in the Thunder Road a few hours and we'll meet ET's friends. They could have a better spaceship, and stuff we need for a long space trip."

Dad gave her a sad look. "Sugar, _you're safe_ here. _With me_."

Gertie frowned. "No, Daddy, _we're hiding_."

"We talked about this, baby doll. _Daddy's going to save up and drive us all to Mexico._ "

Lori gave me a questioning look. He _had_ mentioned this briefly in passing, but I hadn't taken it seriously at the time.

"But you said you're the only one bringing in a good paycheck!" Gertie protested. " _You said without Ruby..._ "

Michael looked hurt by this comment, but didn't argue.

 _"I know, I know..."_ Dad groaned.

"We don't have any idea if we're going to see Ruby _or_ Mommy again, _and there's bad men trying to find us!_ With ET it's going to be safe! Please say you'll come with us!"

"Honey, remember when we watched _Planet of the Apes_ and we saw that man get captured by a bunch of talking monkeys? That could be us!"

"So you'd rather have the army capture us?"

"I didn't say that."

"ET's our best bet," I said. "Last night you asked if I were trying to get rid of you. We're not. But we're going to do this with or without you."

Tears rolled down Gertie's cheeks. "If you say no, _you're_ the one that'll be leaving _us!_ I don't ant you to stay behind, daddy. _Please_ say you'll come!"

Dad swallowed. "Well...If me going into space to meet your moon man really means that much to you, _I guess I could handle sitting in your tin can for a few hours..._ "

"Yay!" She brightened, throwing her arms around him.

"What does _Michael_ think about all this?"

My brother sighed, rubbed his bloodshot eyes. "Let me wake up a little more and we'll talk."

We left for school.

"I...don't know," Michael said as we reached the end of the block en route to school. "I...I mean, yeah, I'm going to miss you guys, but..."

Gertie frowned. " _You're going to miss Timmashay too._ "

He reddened. "Yeah. _And she has a family._ "

"What if they capture you?" I asked.

" _I never touched ET. Have you ever seen me glow or do the crazy things you can?_ "

"Well, no..."

"So I'll, what, end up in a cell for awhile. I don't see why they'd hold me for anything."

Gertie acted like she were about to cry again. " _So you're just going to leave us?_ "

 _"Gertie_...I'm almost an adult. I can make my own decisions, and, well, _I really love Timmashay_. I'm thinking maybe when we graduate, we can _move somewhere, find some better jobs..._ "

Gertie stopped in her tracks and started sobbing.

Michael reddened. "Hey! Stop with the waterworks! Look, when mom and dad had us, they moved away from their folks and started their own family. It was sad, but you know, that's how families work."

Gertie stared. " _You're going to have a baby?_ "

My brother's face turned a deeper shade of red. "No! _I was just trying to explain..._ "

She sighed, wiped her eyes. _"You're right. If you have a baby, she'll want to have a daddy...Still, it would be nice if you_ and her _came along..."_

 _"Yeah? For how long?"_

"I dunno, forever?"

Michael laughed. "No way. One close encounter is enough for me for a lifetime! Besides, I haven't even begun to see all there is to _this_ planet. That road trip we had was the closest thing we had to seeing the world in a long time!"

When we arrived at school, I saw Jimmy bashfully waving to my girlfriend, and when he approached, he started telling her how nice she looked, kind of laying it on thick, complimenting her on her clothing ("These cheap things?") and hair ("I only washed it," she said).

He swallowed, mumbling an apology for the other day.

The moment he started to ask, she kissed him on the mouth.

I didn't see Jimmy glow, except maybe on the inside. Maybe they did later, but I couldn't stand to watch any more.

"I guess we _really are_ cousins now," I snarled, stomping into the building.

In science, I did okay. I paid attention like I was supposed to, answered the teacher's questions when I was called. The coffee worked, and plus I (ahem) _didn't have anyone like Lori to distract me._

At the end of class, Lori came up to me, looking apologetic, but as she fumbled for words, I could tell she wasn't sorry, she just wanted to keep her options open. "Elliott...I..."

Before she could complete the thought, I said, "Are you going to stay with him, or are we bringing him along? _He has a family, you know._ "

"Elliott, _you've got a family._ "

"Yeah, but he's normal. I mean, sure, he's got an abusive dad, but that's not an excuse to leave the earth forever. _It's not like he glows in the dark!_ "

She choked down a sob, rushing out the door.

How do you comfort someone in a situation like that?

I had kept awake in science, but my performance in gym was less than stellar. _That was okay,_ but I doubted anyone would pick me for basketball again.

At lunch, Jimmy plopped down at my table like I wanted him there.

"I was just talking with Lori... _who said you could kick me out?_ "

He looked like he wanted to pound me, but I figured him beating me up would actually work in my favor. "I dunno, _your mom? Your family? People that would care if you disappeared into space forever?"_

 _"What about you, jerk? Don't tell me you were born in a test tube!"_

"I literally can't go back home. What's your excuse?"

He grabbed me by the collar, balling his fist.

"Go ahead," I said. "I'd like you to explain it to Lori."

Jimmy let go, and then, shockingly, sniffed and started wiping tears from his eyes. "That's not fair!... _What about you?_ How will _you_ live all alone like that?"

I stared sadly at the table. "I don't have a choice...You think I _want_ to never see mom and the rest of my family again?"

He was still trying to be tough, wiping his eyes. "So when are you leaving?"

"Um...I don't know...when the Thunder Road looks safe enough to travel. Gertie said...our alien has friends waiting somewhere, but I don't know where they are...I don't exactly want to wait for the black vans to start showing up."

"I still want to help," he said. "What we're doing is cool... _and_ important."

The bell rang, and we left for our next hour classes.

In English, Ms. Horne had us read _Macbeth_ , we studied something called gerunds, worked on grammar exercises. I didn't get the computer class after that because they decided it should be a reward for straight A students, so I went on to French.

I was dreading my next meeting with Lori... _and Jimmy_ , so I took my time leaving school that day.

I found the two sitting on the front steps, talking to each other. I walked up to them and just stared.

Looking pained, Lori said, "Elliott, I... _we've been talking.._.And, well, your dad seems to be the only one who knows that I've been glowing, _and even he wouldn't have said anything if I hadn't told him._ I think if the authorities _did_ capture me, _they wouldn't know any better. They might even let me go. Especially if I tell the right story._ "

I paled. "What are you trying to say?"

Lori frowned at me. "Elliott, I...I'm not going."

I tried to keep the emotion out of my voice, but it didn't work. You could still kinda tell I was upset. " _Because of him, right?_ "

 _"Well,_ I mean, _I can't just leave my family,_ Elliott. _I'm not like you. I can go back._ "

What could I really say to that? I glanced at her, and Jimmy, and my eyes just started watering.

Wiping my eyes, I turned away, to get my sister from the playground.

I found Gertie snoozing on a swing set. When approached, she rubbed her eyes and said, "The teacher has been asking why I've been lying down in class. She asked if I was sick, but I said no, I told her I was up late building a spaceship with my brother."

I stared. "Did she believe you?"

Gertie shrugged. "She asked me if it were _Star Trek_ or _Battlestar Galactica_. She said she made a model of a Dalek and a TARDIS from _Doctor Who_ using a technical manual once."

She must have noticed my facial expression or something, for then she asked, "What's wrong, Elliott? You look sad!"

"Lori doesn't want to come with us."

Gertie looked puzzled. "Why not?" And then, "Why are you crying?... _Ohh._ "

She gave me a hug. "Elliott, it's not about her. It's about ET."

"No, Gertie," I said. " _It's about family._ "

"Guys," Jimmy called to us. "You want to put some finishing touches on our project? _I know where we can find some red paint..._ "

Jimmy found us some pretty good house paint. It wasn't oil based, so it wouldn't catch fire in re-entry. Gertie was so excited about the idea that she nearly painted the windows so we couldn't see out.

Since she was having so much fun with that, I, Jimmy and Lori took care of more important details. We stocked the ship with as many helpful items as we could, food, bottled water, some hardy plants, plus the O2 Jimmy had brought us the other day. I didn't want to think about the `Depend-O's, but he had brought those too.

I also added my little liquid oxygen farm to the machine (algae), to lessen tank usage later on.

My sister had come close to covering one entire side of the thing before Jimmy cried, "Oh God! I forgot the asbestos shingles!"

I remembered they had torn out the ceiling in entire sections of my school due to that stuff. "I thought asbestos gave you cancer."

"It's fireproof, dummy! NASA puts it on their shuttles!"

"Jimmy, they don't use housing shingles," Lori said.

"So what? Asbestos is asbestos, right? _It's not like we can find a spray_!" He glanced at my sister. "Hold off on the painting, little girl."

Lori dug in her bag, bringing out Gertie's stuffed toys.

My sister stared in amazement. "How did you-?"

 _"Magic."_

Gertie pouted. "But how! _I wanna know!"_

"I saw your mom, okay! I've been keeping this stuff for a long time, but I didn't want your dad to see it because I knew he'd find out about me." Noticing her questioning look, Lori added, "The last time I saw her, she was fine. The government people let me see her because they thought I didn't know anything, okay?"

Gertie hugged her. "Thank you."

Jimmy left the clearing. I'm guessing Lori would have left with him, but I needed her help to install the computer inside the vehicle, and Jimmy said he'd only be a minute.

We didn't talk for awhile.

Lori plugged in some wires. _"Elliott..."_

"Stop," I said. "I don't want to hear it."

I thought Gertie had been napping in the back seat, but it turned out she was eavesdropping. "That's what mommy said to daddy before they divorced. _I think, if they actually talked..._ "

My face flushed red. " _Gertie,_ this is none of your business."

 _"They said that too. You gonna start throwing things?"_

My stomach did a flip-flop. _"Gertie! We're not even married!"_

Lori giggled. _"Maybe not, but she's right. It doesn't hurt to listen."_

I sighed. "Fine. What do you want to say? That Jimmy's a great guy?"

 _"That's just it. You're both great guys..._ That's what makes this so difficult. Elliott, I love you...but you can't ask me to give up my family. I mean, if you could go back to your mom and everything, wouldn't you feel the same way?"

I reluctantly nodded.

I think she was getting up to hug me or something, but the moment she came close, we heard a commotion outside, kids laughing and shouting.

I looked out the windshield and saw, to my dismay, that Jimmy had brought his buddies to our secret lair.

Jimmy rode a bicycle, a cart full of shingles and assorted junk hooked up to the back end. His two friends lugged cardboard boxes. "Try to keep up, you guys!" he called. "We're almost there!"

"Easy for you to say!" called his friend, tall, gangly and freckled. "You're the one with the bike!"

Dirt and gravel crackled against Jimmy's tires as he rolled down to where we were, squeezing the brakes.

 _"That's your spaceship?"_ Mocked a dark haired boy in a ripped sleeveless denim jacket. _"How's_ that _going to fly? It looks like crap!"_

"It looks like someone's crummy Honda Civic."

"Fix It Again Tony," Freckles corrected.

"Whatever. It's not going to fly."

Jimmy scowled at him. "What did I say, Kevin? I'll prove it to you! Just help us with these shingles."

"This had better not be some stupid art project."

 _"Does it look like an art project?"_

 _"Yeah. It does. A crappy one."_

"Well it's not. The shingles are supposed to help us against the heat."

"They, isn't ass-sept-toes that stuff that gives you cancer?"

 _"It's also used by NASA on space shuttles."_

Kevin put a hand to his breast. " _Wow. They sacrifice so much!_ "

 _"It sure doesn't look like NASA,"_ said the dark haired boy. Bruce, I presumed by elimination.

 _"Screw you! NASA has millions of dollars to work with. We only had a hundred. This is what a hundred looks like._ Help me with the shingles."

I rushed outside the Thunder Road, staring at the newcomers. "Jimmy, you can't-"

"Relax!" he said. " _I told them the situation._ Nobody wants you to get taken away to be dissected. They just want to see the ship in action."

I sighed. "Okay, fine. I hope you're right."

The task of attaching the shingles wasn't as easy as we thought. We tried hammering, but the shingles were brittle if you struck them in the wrong spot, tended to shatter, and we were nailing into metal. We ended up using an electric screwdriver from Jimmy's house, regular screwdrivers, and hammering in small carpentry nails. Jimmy had a nail gun, but the nails didn't have any heads, so the shingles slid right off after you drove one in. Maybe we didn't know how to use it, I don't know.

It was also kind of tricky getting the shingles on the underside. We tried floating the vehicle up, but of course the energy forcefield kept us from doing any sort of damage to the shell while it was on. We ended up parking it on cinder blocks, then rolling it slightly to the side to get the parts we missed. Of course, it still wasn't great because when we set it down, I could hear the shingles crunching like corn flakes.

"Give it up," said Kevin. "This thing is just going to have to burn up in re-entry."

Jimmy didn't disagree. " _Anyways._..you guys believe me now, right? _You saw it fly._ "

Kevin nodded, but Bruce said, "I don't know. I've seen hovercrafts doing that much on TV. _You know they got them in Europe..._ "

When Jimmy looked at me, I could guess what he wanted before he asked.

"Not until it's dark. I'll take it up in the air, but we're not crossing the treeline or going out of the woods. Not until dad gets here."

Jimmy's friends looked disappointed, but they agreed to the terms.

We helped Gertie paint the shingles, but Jimmy and his friends didn't want to wait for it to dry. They wanted their test flight.

When Jimmy boarded the Thunder Road, he brought along a BB gun and an echo mike thing he'd removed from a Snake Mountain Playset.

"Wait," I protested. "What's that for?"

He added a flare gun and a pellet gun to the arsenal. "Hey, what if you go to that planet and some wild...Bantha attacks you? You should at least have _some_ protection!"

He brought in his microphone and speaker system with a car battery.

"And what's that doing?"

"Um, _long range communication?_ "

"Sound doesn't travel in space. It needs air as a conductor."

Jimmy only looked annoyed.

"Okay, _at least I understand_ why you brought it. What's with the toy?"

Jimmy pressed the echo mike up to the microphone of his speaker system, switched on the power. _"You dare question Skeletor!"_

So I floated his buddies up in the air.

The next thing he said was, "Take us to the State Fairgrounds!"

"No," I said. "I thought you weren't interested in the FFA."

"I'm not. I just want to scare the cattle."

I gave Lori a questioning look.

"It's daylight," she said. "Someone will see us."

"Yeah? Like who? _A hillbilly farmer?_ They talk about UFO's all the time! C'mon, it's right on the other side of the woods."

Of course, Jimmy wasn't satisfied with a mere fly over, he wanted to take over the controls. Seeing as we had a protective bubble, I reluctantly let him fly us low, causing a stampede and frightening a poor farmer out of his wits. I was glad the State Fair had yet to start for the year. It was just one herd.

We eventually did return to the clearing, but not until we'd destroyed part of someone's barn and scared a bunch of horses on a nearby farm property.

To my great relief, neither Dad nor my brother had returned home yet.

The moment we stepped out, I thought I heard someone, but Jimmy said the rustling I'd heard in the bushes was only a rabbit, and maybe some other wild animals.

We set about giving the shingles we'd attached to the shell a second coat, trying our best to look innocent when Dad showed up.

By that time, of course, Jimmy told his buddies to scram, since he guessed how Dad would react to so many kids knowing our secret.

"That's...interesting, he commented when he saw what we did to the exterior. "You sure that paint's not flammable?"

As promised, Dad _did_ let us do some more test flying when it got dark, he and Michael supervising the operation.

We kept below the treeline and out of sight of houses... _at first_.

"You're doing great!" Dad radioed to us. "I admit I was skeptical at first, but you guys really pulled it off!...Now set her down. Don't forget you have school tomorrow."

"No way!" Jimmy cried. " _We got a friggin' spaceship!_ _Let's do something cool with it!_ " Of course he didn't radio that to Dad.

"I don't know..." Lori said. "I _am_ kinda tired..."

"What, are you guys chicken? This is your big chance to play around with this thing! Did Enzo Ferrari build a car just to drive up to the corner grocery store to buy milk? No, he's a race car driver."

I rolled my eyes. "Jimmy, _I'm_ not a race car driver."

"So? Ferruccio Lamborghini used to be a grape farmer."

"What," I said. "You got a subscription to all the car magazines or something?"

 _"They're more interesting than all those plant books_ you _read!"_

I looked Lori in the eyes, wondering what she thought.

"Oh c'mon, Elliott! _It's dark._ What harm could it do?... _This may be_ your last chance to... _enjoy the earth, you know, before you leave it forever._ "

I swallowed. "Okay, but be careful."

Dad yelled into the walkie-talkie as the Thunder Road darted out of the woods. Mike was yelling too, warning us this was a bad idea.

Jimmy's buddies, it turned out, hadn't gone home, so he swung by and picked them up.

Our radio got out of range and we heard no more warnings from the radio.

At first, it was just a scenic joyride. We buzzed over the town, admiring the lights, zoomed over the vineyards, hovered over the river and quaint buildings on the high cliffs along its shores.

"It's times like these I wish we had a beach," Kevin complained. "We could see all the chicks in swimsuits."

"It's night. You wouldn't see much anyway."

Jimmy did the `next best thing', flying us along the upper portion of a hotel, where people left their curtains open. When the people saw they had an audience, they yelled and closed the drapes. I had to cover Gertie's eyes a few times.

There were quite a few times that I yelled too, wishing I could un-see what I just saw. In fact, one really ugly lady even gave us a little show.

The next thing I knew, we were flying over the junk yard Jimmy's father owned.

Jimmy lowered the Thunder Road at level with the rustbucket exterior of the main office trailer, switching on the high beams.

He opened a drier door, firing a flare and the BB gun at the trailer's window.

He lit smoke bombs, dropped them over the side.

"Jimmy!" I hissed. "What-"

But Jimmy was already switching on the microphone system. "Charles Allen Myers! Come out of that trailer this instant!"

I heard indistinct yelling from inside.

Jimmy tried again. "Charles Allen Myers! Get your butt out here! _I command it!_ "

The front door cracked open. "Yeah? You and what army?"

Jimmy fired a flare at the trailer, right next to the door. _"The Lords of Cobol!"_

I admit, it _did_ seem _fairly_ impressive.

 _Charles_ came outside with a rifle in hand. "What the hell do you-"

He looked up at our vehicle, staring in disbelief.

Gertie didn't know _what_ was going on. I kept waving for her to stay in the back so nobody could see her.

Jimmy leaned out the drier door, shining a flashlight in the man's eyes. "Kneel before the Lords of Cobol, so we may have mercy on you and spare your sorry excuse for a life!"

Mr. Myers raised the gun.

"Oh shit!" I cried.

We braced ourselves, but the bullet cracked harmlessly off our ship's protective bubble.

 _"You dare attack us with your puny earth weapons?"_ Jimmy mocked, his buddies keeping the flashlight shining in the man's face. "Drop the rifle now or we will vaporize you with our photon torpedoes!"

Trembling, Charles obeyed, shakily dropping to his knees. "Please... _Cobol Lords_! _I have a son!_ Do not kill me!" I'm assuming this wouldn't have worked if the man weren't already drunk.

 _"You dare use your own offspring as a bargaining chip?_ You don't care about him, you filthy drunk! You only care about yourself!"

The man wrinkled his brow, as if gaining suspicions about his so-called ` _Lords._ ' _"What?"_

"You drink alcohol and beat him!" Jimmy shouted into the microphone. "Tell us why we should spare you... _or your son!_ "

"Please Lords!" The man had his hands folded and raised, as if in prayer. "I'll do better! I'll change my ways! I promise!"

Dropping the charade, Jimmy set aside the microphone, yelling out the door. "You're full of crap, old man! Take this!"

He shot his father with the pellet gun, threw eggs at him.

"You little bastard!" the man yelled, shaking his fist at him. "I'll make you _and your alien friends_ pay for this!"

Jimmy and his buddies burst out laughing.

Mr. Myers hurled a beer bottle at us, but it just shattered on the ground.

"You gotta admit," Jimmy said with a grin. " _That was fun..._ Let's go to the drive-in."

Thunder rumbled ominously in the distance, as if in response.

"We should go back," I said. "I think we've caused enough trouble."

"C'mon, Elliott! _Don't be a pussy! It's just the drive-in!_ "

I rushed to the controls, to steer us back to the woods, but Jimmy just grabbed me, pulling me away from the keyboard. When he started pressing buttons, I gave him a shove, and he hit me.

We traded blows for a moment. Outside, the storm brewed, as if reacting to our inner turmoil.

"Boys!" Lori scolded. "Stop! Elliott, he's right, it's just the drive-in!"

"It's always _`just'_ something!" I cried. _"We need to go back!_ He'll ruin everything!"

She frowned.

Jimmy's buddies held me down in the chair. I could only watch helplessly as we flew off to Screenland 14.

It wasn't the weekend, so the place wasn't packed as I thought it would be. Still, I _did see_ a number of cars there. They had a promotion where you could watch a bunch of scifi films real cheap.

Kevin snickered when he saw Star Wars showing on their big screen. "Hey guys. I got an idea."

He whipped our vehicle around a fence, and then, when it got to the part of the film where the Imperial Star Destroyer was chasing after a rebel spaceship, he slowly brought the Thunder Road out above the audience, making the sounds of the Imperial March into the microphone.

"Hey, what's that?" I heard someone at the snack bar say.

Someone else said, "It kinda looks like...a _Fiat._ "

"I didn't know Fiat made spaceships!"

The fun ended when Kevin collided with the movie screen.

I guess, while the large white backdrop had withstood the wind and weather and so forth, it hadn't been designed to handle vehicular impact. The moment we ran into it, the rear supports bent and snapped, the whole thing toppled over with a loud crash.

"Holy shit!" Jimmy cried, half laughing. "Did we just do that?"

"What the hell is that thing?" someone shouted.

"We're being invaded!" a woman cried.

"I want my money back!"

Another person clapped. "Hey, this is great! _Screw the film! Encore!"_

I glared at Jimmy, angered at how much I'd let him get away with. "Great. _Now you've done it!"_

"We _really should_ leave now." Lori pointed down. "Look! That security guard is already calling backup!"

"You don't have to tell me twice!" Jimmy hurriedly rushed us away from there, returning us to the woods.

 _...A different part of the woods than we normally used for flight tests._

He shut off the lights and landed.

"Uh...Jimmy?" I stammered.

"Trust me, it's better this way."

Once out, Jimmy started grabbing brush and leaves, throwing them over our vehicle. "C'mon, help me with this stuff, will ya?"

And we all started adding debris to the camouflage.

After we'd done that, Jimmy marched off down a hill.

I hustled after him. "Do you even know where we are? Or if there's any wild animals, or something else dangerous?"

He laughed. "The only thing you're in danger of out here is tripping over a rock!"

He was basically correct. Bruce reported a snake, but it slithered away, a bobcat appeared but ran off, and owls just make a lot of noise. The scariest thing that happened was Dad yelling at us.

Jimmy's friends made themselves scarce.

When we entered the clearing, the first words out of Dad's mouth were, _"Where is the thing?_ It's got to be dismantled!"

We didn't respond quickly enough, I guess, for then he shouted, "Now! Where'd you park it?"

I began to offer an excuse, but Jimmy spoke first. "I ain't telling you shit, old man."

Dad glared at him, clenching his fists. _"I don't think I heard you correctly. What's that again?"_

 _"I said go to hell."_

"Kid, I don't know who you think you are, or who you think I am, but your reckless actions have put my family in jeopardy, and I don't take that kind of thing lightly."

Jimmy reddened. "How do you know it was me? How did you know we did anything?"

 _"Doesn't matter,"_ Dad said, though I noticed a pair of binoculars on the ground. "You're going to show me where you parked that thing, and you're going to dismantle it before the authorities start showing up."

 _"Or what?"_ Jimmy challenged. _"You'll beat on me like my dad?"_

For a moment, Dad looked at him like he'd do just that, but then he just sighed through his nose and said, "Ever since my pappy died, I swore not to strike a child, but you're pushing it, kid."

Jimmy only looked smug., causing Dad's anger to boil over.

"You selfish boy! You think you're pretty clever don't you? _Think you got it all figured out, as long as you personally aren't affected, you don't care who you hurt!_ Well I got news for you. _I_ heard _what they said on the police scanner._ If your _little excursion_ gets us any unwanted attention, your little friends are going away for a long time, and if the people after us catch wind of your involvement, you're going down with us. In fact, _I'll personally see to it that they believe you have a third eye, and your ass glows in the dark. Get a nice padded cell in a military compound_ , _with options open for exploratory surgery."_

Jimmy kept scratching his wrists and hands. I think he had picked up some poison ivy. "You wouldn't! I'm a kid!"

 _"And I'm a father with two sons and a daughter_. Make no mistake, kid. Just because I don't work you over with my fists doesn't mean I'm your personal doormat."

"Whatever. I'm still not letting you destroy the Thunder Road."

Dad frowned at Lori. _"Where did you put it? Don't make me put you out of doors!"_

She swallowed. "I dunno. _It's dark_. I wouldn't know _where_ to begin looking."

Gertie started crying, blubbering all kinds of reasons why we needed the ship.

"Oh Jesus," Dad groaned. "Where is your mother when I need her? If she were here, you wouldn't be pulling the old waterworks routine. She _never_ fell for it. _Nearly had me buying a pony that one time. Not her._ "

The anger left him. "All right, you can keep your little flying machine. The sad thing is, we may actually need it to get out of town. Pray to God it won't play out like that, but..."

Dad sent Jimmy home.

Due to the circumstances, I, Lori and Gertie ended up going to bed earlier than we had the previous nights, but Dad, being restless and fearful of the authorities, kept checking the windows and the radio to see if anyone had come after us. The following morning we found him asleep next to the police scanner. If Michael hadn't woken us up, we would have been late for school.

The fact we had borrowed Dad's groceries did not go unnoticed, but he didn't complain when he was cooking us breakfast.

Dad's fears weren't unjustified. During breakfast, a cop came knocking on our door.

Dad told us to stay inside, but we peeked through the windows. The officer was old, heavy-set, and wore a ranger hat too small for his big head. I pressed my ear to the door to listen in.

"You seen _anything...unusual_ in these woods lately?" the man was asking.

"Uh, no officer," Dad said. "Why, is there a problem?"

 _"Well,_ I got some rumors about a _hot air balloon_ or some _fancy jet_. Been causing some trouble in town."

"What kind of trouble?"

"Oh, _property damage_ for one, _scared the piss out of the guy down at the scrap yard.._.Got him raving like a lunatic."

He showed dad a painted shingle that had fallen off the Thunder Road. "You know what this is?"

"Looks like a house shingle. Why?"

 _"It came off of the...balloon._ Found it at the drive-in after it knocked over the screen. Seen any around here lately?"

 _"No, can't say that I have..."_

"Let me know if you find any. Some higher-ups want to get to the bottom of this. We've been asking around, but haven't gotten any good leads yet...You'll let me know if you find anything, won't you?"

"You got it, officer."

At last the cop waddled back to his car and drove off.

The moment the man was gone, Dad rushed back into the house and slammed the door shut, his face pale and drawn. "C'mon, kids. Pack your things. We're going."

"What?" I cried.

"We're going. Thanks to your little science project, we've outstayed our welcome."

"Wait," Michael said. "Won't it look weird if we suddenly start packing up everything after the police showed up?"

Dad rubbed his face in frustration. "All right. Get everything together so we can go when it gets dark. It's school as usual. I'll...guess I'll go to work. Try to at least slip a few necessities into the truck before we go, okay?"

And so we rushed through the cabin, packing our things, hiding the scientific paperwork, stuffing a few changes of clothing into the pickup.

We ran out of time, hurrying down the street to school, sweaty, red face, flustered, imagining spies around every corner.

"Guys," Michael said. "If for some reason we get separated, and I never see you again, I just want to let you know I...have always cared for you...And if I get captured by someone, maybe go to jail, I don't want you coming back for me...I...I can figure out things by myself. Just run, okay?"

Choked with emotion, none of us answered.

"I said _okay!_ "

We reluctantly agreed.

"I love you too," Gertie said.

I swallowed. "Yeah, big brother. Me too."

"Remember. You see anything suspicious, anything that, you know, _doesn't sit right with you_ , find an excuse to get the hell out of there. I'm sure they'll pull any trick they can to grab you."

He frowned at Gertie. "I don't like you being in that building alone right now, but it can't be helped. Maybe you could play sick and have Dad come pick you up."

She gave him a reluctant nod.

We didn't see Jimmy at the building. Instead, his friends came up to meet us. Lori asked where he was.

"The cops are after him," Kevin said. "You know, because of what happened with the old man. You can probably understand why he might not want to come to school."

When we walked into the building, we found people staring at us. Already a bad sign. No one said anything, so I had no clue what they know, _or what they didn't_.

"I didn't want to tell you," Kevin whispered behind us. "But I saw some kids spying on us yesterday. One of them had a Polaroid. We tried to grab them, but they ran off."

"Act natural," Lori muttered.

We had a test in science class. I barely got fifty percent of the answers right. Mr. Sigler sighed in disappointment when he handed the test back, not saying anything.

I went to gym, had lunch.

That was the last normal thing I would do for a long, long time.

In the hallway outside, Kevin called to me and Lori, frantically gesturing to the window. "Uh...guys?"

With my heart hammering, I rushed to where he stood, peering through the blinds.

A black van with a radar dish on its roof had been parked along the school's front drive, men in Hazmat suits waving Geiger c counters around the building.

"We've _got_ to get out of here," I hissed.

Kevin pulled the fire alarm, hustling us down the hallway before anyone could pinpoint who'd pulled it.

"We should slip out the back," Lori said as we rushed to the stairs.

"Two kids sneaking out the back while the whole school goes out the front?" said Kevin. " _They'll be expecting that!_ "

We tried to look normal, joining the herd of students as they filed their way out to the front lawn.

We had teachers watching us, making sure no students slipped away from the property. The men in ABC gear stared at all the kids, checked radioactivity levels. Cops walked around, muttering to the men, pointing at people.

"I'm going to check on Gertie," Lori said.

She must have noticed my questioning look, for then she added, "Like I told you before, they don't know who I am. As long as I'm not seen with you, I don't think they'll notice me, or care who I am."

"Yeah, but _what will I do?"_

Lori rolled her eyes. "Use your brain. Keep away from.. _.those guys,_ don't do anything that makes you stick out."

 _"Wait. You're still officially my cousin."_

Lori reddened. "Shit." She shook her head. "Doesn't matter. They probably won't recognize me. They'll look for you first." With that, she slipped into the crowd.

I kept to the border of the milling throng, not at the edge, but near it, stepping behind kids whenever an authority figure other than a teacher looked in my direction.

Cops were showing my classmates pictures, and the pieces of asbestos. I couldn't tell what they were saying, but someone pointed in my direction. I quickly moved behind a couple tall kids and they lost me. Still, I knew I had to get out of there fast.

...But how?

I spotted Dad's blue F-100 coming up alongside the curb, but it seemed like a galaxy away.

Dad stopped, got out, talked with Mrs. Horne, showing her a little booklet. From the design, I guessed it to be a funeral program.

The big woman gave him a sympathetic nod, looking around for me, but of course the cops were looking for me too. In fact, _Dad_ _didn't escape their notice, either_.

Boom!

I looked back and saw Jimmy popping out from behind some bushes, hurling M-80's at the police cars.

As the guys in Hazmat suits and police officers turned to look, I rushed up to Dad, giving Mrs. Horne a sideways glance. _"She's finally gone, isn't she?"_ I ventured.

Dad coughed, showing me his father's picture.

I made myself appropriately sad, though granddad died five years ago, and Dad had marked through the date with a felt tip. "Oh. Right. That _is_ today, isn't it?"

Dad nodded, glanced at my teacher. _"This week has been a little hard on all of us. You probably noticed how tired he looks."_

Mrs. Horne completely bought it. She didn't even question how he kept hiding the program from her scrutiny. "Oh! I'm _so_ sorry! _I had no idea._ "

Dad rubbed my head. " _C'mon, kid. Let's go._ " I could feel tension in his hands as he noticed the cops.

We hurried into the truck.

Through the back window, I could see officers slapping Jimmy with handcuffs.

"You shouldn't lie, daddy," Gertie said from the back seat.

Dad shifted into drive. "Sorry, darling. Daddy can't tell the truth like you can. _Folks are liable to believe him._ "

A moment later, my sister had her face pressed to the window, pointing to something. "Mommy! I see mommy!"

Dad smirked. "Yeah. _I saw her too. And her police escort._ "

When people started shouting at us, Dad stepped on the gas.

"Wait," I said. "Where's Lori?"

 _"Probably with your mother,"_ Dad said. "These people pulled out _all the stops._..When were you going to tell me that _girlfriend_ didn't have any supernatural powers?"

"I didn't say she didn't have any, daddy," Gertie said. "I just said nobody knows about it but us."

I swallowed. _"Well..."_

Dad sighed. "We all got some hard choices to make. We can either let them whisk us away to their secret army base, or we can start letting people go... _At least they won't try to dissect your girlfriend._ "

 _"Mommy..."_ Gertie whimpered.

"I know, sweetie. Those guys will do anything to nab you."

Hearing more shouts, he turned up the volume on the car's tape deck, _Stay Hungry_ by Twisted Sister.

It started raining. Thunder cracked in the distance, the sky turning dark as night. "Oh great," Dad grumbled. "That's lovely. Hope we can use the weather to our advantage."

Dad tried to cross the bridge leading out of town, but ran into a police barricade. He swerved, turned around, driving back the way we came. Not to the school, of course, but to another route that would hopefully get us out.

"Why don't we just use the spaceship?" Gertie asked. _"That's what we built it for!"_

"Sorry, sugar. I don't trust your little contraption that much." He patted the dashboard. "At least with this baby, I know how it works!" He sighed. "Elliott, Gertie...if I never get to see you again, I want you both to know that your daddy loves you very much."

I stifled a sob. "I love you too."

"Me too, daddy," Gertie said.

Only two bridges could get us across the river. When we reached the second one, we ran straight into another police barricade. Dad tried to reverse direction and go back out, maybe to take the southern road out of town, but then some army Jeeps and cop cars boxed us in. Dad slammed on the brakes.

Soldiers, police, men in Hazmat suits approached the truck. A couple of them escorted my mother to the side door.

Mom waved to my sister through the window. "Hey, honey! Long time no see!"

"Mommy!" Gertie cried.

 _"Gertie, these nice men are going to take us back home. You'd like that, wouldn't you?"_

"Umm..." Gertie stammered, glancing nervously at Dad.

Dad mouthed no.

"Daddy says you're going to take us back to that army base."

Mom sighed. Her reply wasn't exactly a no. _"I spoke with them. They're going to make some arrangements. We'll get to see each other, I promise."_

A tear rolled down Gertie's cheek. "Mommy, you shouldn't lie."

"Honey, I _will_ get to see you. _They have some rules about visitation, but they told me they're willing to negotiate._ "

Dad laughed. _"And you believed them, just like that?"_

More tears trickled down my sister's face. "I'm sorry, mommy, I can't! I don't want to go back there! Not ever!"

Mom put her hand on the glass. " _You love me, honey,_ don't you?"

"Yes, mommy," she sobbed. "But those men aren't going to let us be a family again!"

Giving up, Mom gave me a hopeful smile. _"Elliott..._ "

I sighed. "Mom, I love you, but she's right. It's not going to be a home."

"It's not a home now," Mom protested.

"All right." A soldier pressed a rifle to Dad's window. "We tried the carrot. Now here's the stick. Out. Now. We can and will open fire."

"Kids," Dad hissed through his teeth. "Get ready to run. Passenger door."

I gave him a slight nod.

Dad flipped the door handle (he'd been having problems with the door closing mechanism anyway), dropping onto the seat at the same time he kicked the door into the soldier's body. The rifle went off, spraying glass and tearing holes in the ceiling.

"Elliott! Gertie! Run!"

"But Dad!" I protested.

"Go! _Say hello to ET for me!_ "

As Dad got out and punched his attacker in the face, me and Gertie quickly rushed out the passenger side.

Obviously, we couldn't just run away. Like I said, we were surrounded.

The moment we got out of the truck and ran a few feet, a soldier picked up Gertie. I hit the man in the crotch, yanking my sister out of his clutches, but then someone else grabbed me from behind, pinning my arms behind my back.

Mr. Keys stepped out of the crowd, waving to someone. Soldiers led Mom around the corner of the truck, followed by Dad, held at gunpoint by a couple more military guys.

"Elliott, it's time to go home."

It seemed this was the end. Mom gave me and my sister an apologetic smile as we got led to a black van.

As men popped the doors open, an ugly yellow Toyota Tercel rolled up to the barricade.

Cops marched up to its windows, waving the car around, but instead of moving, _the vehicle actually parked, and a weird gun on its roof turned and pointed at a nearby power transformer._

To my absolute surprise, I saw a glowing ball, identical to the one I'd created when I first tested my project, shooting out the gun's muzzle. The transformer blew, throwing everything into darkness.

In a flash of lightning, I saw Mr. Sigler stepping out of the car, throwing out flares.

His wife sat in the driver's seat, gripping the wheel. Gertie pointed. "Hey! That's my teacher!"

I heard a couple thuds, and in another flash of lightning, I saw Timmashay grabbing our hands, leading us away from the barricade.

In another flash of lightning, we brushed past Michael in his tinfoil alien costume and fake alien head. He frantically waved us on.

The soldiers switched on floodlights, but by that time we were running down the street, and my brother was distracting them with dry ice and smoke bombs and flares. I heard gunshots.

Timmashay opened up a red VW Station Wagon, ushering us inside. Once I got in the back and looked out the window, I saw Sigler's bubble cannon blasting more glowing orbs, knocking cops and soldiers to the ground.

Our driver started up the engine, and we sped down the street with the distinct puttering noise that that brand of automobile are known for.

"Daddy!" Gertie sobbed as the barricade disappeared behind us.

I gave her a hug. " _I know._ This isn't going to be easy."

"You seem to have made an impression on your teacher. He said he reminded him of you when he was younger. Said he figured out why you guys had been sleeping in his class."

The Volkswagen came to a stop in front of the school.

"Wait," I cried. "What are we doing here?"

Timmashay clicked her tongue against her teeth. " _Thought you might like to see your girlfriend again_. _I hear she's got a plan."_ She clicked a button on a walkie-talkie. "He's here."

My mouth suddenly got dry. _"My...girlfriend?"_

Timmashay nodded. " _I probably wouldn't keep her waiting._ "

Spotting the flashing lights of cop cars up the street, I quickly dashed out across the front lawn in the rain, with Gertie close at my heels.

Lori came running from the employee parking lot, hair damp and matted, radio in one hand. She rushed up to me, pulled me into her arms and kissed me. The jangling car keys in her hand indicated where she'd been hiding.

"They know," she sighed, pressing her forehead to mine.

She dropped the keys in the grass. "Hope Mrs. Sigler can find these again."

I gave her a questioning glance, but a moment later I saw the reason she did it. The front doors of the school burst open, and a pair of men in army green came storming out. Lori glanced anxiously at the darkened sky, pushed the button on the radio. "Bruce?"

Apparently we had a third walkie-talkie. I heard a voice saying, " _Just a minute!_ "

The soldiers were closing in. Cops and black vans zoomed up to the school. "We don't have a minute."

"Gee, _hold your horses, okay?_ "

A second later, the Thunder Road settled on the grass, door popping open.

"I'll take the army guys," Bruce said as he jumped out. "You guys... _Go to Mars._ "

I swallowed hard. "What about you?"

"You think I want to spend any more time in that cramped little soup can? Get going!"

It was an uneven match, but Bruce charged at the men with a loud yell, doing his best to injure and trip them up. I, Gertie and Lori boarded the Thunder Road.

I noticed that someone had added a fresh car battery to the interior. Important, considering the amount of energy we'd used up the day before.

"Goodbye, Earth," Lori muttered as she stared out the window. "Guess this will be the last time we'll be seeing you."

"Goodbye Earth," Gertie whimpered.

My girlfriend looked into my eyes. "You sure you don't want to go to Mexico, or a deserted island in the Pacific?"

"They'll just come after us again."

"ET's friends are very close," Gertie added. "We should go."

Sighing, Lori brought our vehicle up into the air.

By then, we had radar vans and military vehicles encircling the property on all sides, driving on the grass. Kids, still in school, stared through the windows and muttered with excitement at all the chaotic goings-on.

I don't know where they'd been hiding, but all of a sudden, a squadron of military helicopters swooped in from nowhere, gathering around our little ship, megaphones ordering us to land or they would open fire.

"You think the bubble is bulletproof?" Lori asked.

"Dunno." I pointed to a chopper, a big scary thing like I saw Stallone flying in a Rambo film. "I'm more worried about those rockets. Maybe we _should_ set it down."

Lori entered the commands on the keyboard, but we only dropped a few feet before our vehicle started... _having its own ideas_.

With frightening speed, the Thunder Road shot out sideways from beneath the cluster of helicopters, whipped up in a diagonal, and ran a ring around a pair of them.

"What's happening!" I cried. "What are you doing!"

"Nothing!" Lori shouted as she frantically pressed buttons. "I've lost control of the system!"

I dug my fingernails into the chair as our ship took us through another harrowing airborne maneuver that somehow resulted in two of the Rambo helicopters colliding and crashing on the ground.

The Thunder Road shot like a bullet toward the clock face on City Hall.

"Shut it off!" I yelled. "We're going to crash!"

"If we shut it off, we won't even have the bubble to protect us!" Lori protested.

We braced ourselves as the building loomed close.

A moment before impact, the Thunder Road abruptly reversed direction, and we were soaring over the river.

"Now!" I said. "Shut it off! At least we'll have a water landing!"

"Wait!" Lori pointed to the monitor. "Look!"

On screen, I now saw a diagram showing two blinking dots, one larger, indicating our position, the other smaller, somewhere further away, above us, with a line in between them. As I stared, the dot traveled further and further up the line, as if tracing a map.

"He's really doing it!" Gertie exclaimed. "ET's taking us home!"


	15. Chapter 15: The Selenites

We'd shut off the oxygen intake the moment the Thunder Road shot through earth's cloud cover. The algae sloshed around in its tank, but still looked healthy under the plant lights. Already it smelled like a swamp in the compartment, so I figured we were in good shape. Hopefully it and some other potted plants we had would filter enough CO2 out of the compartment that we wouldn't pass out from our own exhalations. Just in case, though, Lori prepared one of the oxygen tanks. We'd have to pass the mask around, but it was workable.

"You think we're going to be safe up here?" Lori asked. "I mean, _Mr. Sigler knew how to build the engine..._ "

I shrugged. "He wasn't exactly working with the government, and he only had part of the puzzle we were working on in class. _So he can build an asteroid crusher. It doesn't mean he can actually make something fly_. I'm thinking they'll only be able to make guns with it. Hopefully we'll be gone before anyone figures out the technology."

The clouds passed by, the sky darkening as we reached the upper atmosphere.

"Lori," I said. "You told me _`they knew.'_ How did they find out?"

"I'm not sure. All I know is what Mrs. Sigler told me. Mr. Sigler said he overheard some kids telling the government guys about me, something about how I was glowing and speaking in tongues. I have no idea which kids they were, I just know, after that, the soldiers and space suits started coming after me."

"I'm sorry," I said.

"Don't be. I think your alien friend always wanted us to be together... _You liked me before you met him, didn't you?_ "

"Y-yeah," I stammered.

Lori chortled a bit. "Guess that explains why you were always pulling my pigtails. I think ET just... _made you bolder._ "

I blushed. "Yeah.'

My girlfriend sighed. "You think we'll ever go back?"

My stomach sank and it wasn't just the G-forces. "Not sure. We probably need to hide out for awhile. I'm not sure if we'll ever find our families again."

"I hope we made the right decision," Lori muttered.

I had nothing to say to that.

 _"I saw Ruby,"_ Gertie said. "She was on that first bridge we came to. She waved at us. I didn't see her girls."

I wiped tears out of my eyes. I was trying to hold it together and be tough like dad, but the fact of the matter was, I was in the process of losing everything. "Gertie...Lori..." I choked back a sob. "We're only got each other now."

I didn't see any flames. It seemed either the asbestos was doing its job, or the bubble protected us from the violent friction of air particles.

We gazed in wonderment as the stars appeared, and our ship actually entered space itself.

No longer under the pull of gravity, we drifted in our seats, held down only by our seatbelts.

The algae in the aquarium sloshed more violently now, threatening to escape, but I and Gertie had developed a system to keep it from spraying all over the place, a filter lid, pipettes and retorts for keeping the water from going outside. Only air would be flowing out. We sent the CO2 to the algae through two liter bottles and an aquarium bubbler stone. We also had a pump built in to _feed_ the algae liquid plant food.

Before we left, Gertie mentioned how it was going to be cold, but I hadn't really taken it seriously when she packed a bunch of blankets, and, earlier, insisted that we include the Fiat's heater during the build. Now, away from the earth, all three of us sat bundled up, seeing our breath as the heater warmed up.

"This isn't quite as fun as I thought it would be," Lori muttered, rubbing her arms.

With chattering teeth, I said, "Hopefully we'll meet up with... _someone_ with a warmer ship."

"It would be warmer if this thing ran on atomic energy."

"That's okay. I'd rather not turn into a mutant."

"We should have brought along the kerosene heater."

"We only got one fire extinguisher, and I'm not sure that kind of heat expansion would do to the hull."

"The kerosene is in the trunk," Gertie said. "We had a spare tank in the basement. I thought we might need to start a fire, you know, if we need to cook something."

Lori scrunched up her face. _"You mean onboard?"_

"No, I mean, _whenever we land_. If we need a fire, we can start one."

"I hope that hot plate still works. I'd much prefer to use _that._ "

Gertie pulled the shower curtain closed around our little bathroom area, came out a few seconds later in her homemade flight suit. _"This was a good idea! I feel warmer!"_

 _"Embarrassment will do that to you,"_ I muttered.

"Hey," Lori protested. _"Don't be mean."_

"Are _you_ going to wear _yours?_ "

To my chagrin, _she actually put hers on_. _"Hey, they're just pajamas."_

I rolled my eyes. _"Pass."_

Gertie had packed a portable cassette player, and a couple of her favorite tapes. We would eventually get sick of Genesis, and have better uses for the flashlight batteries, but at the moment, _Home By the Sea_ and some other tunes seemed okay.

We traveled for about an hour, but saw no sign of any aliens.

"I thought you said ET's friends were waiting," I complained.

Gertie frowned. "I thought they were."

Lori pointed to the screen. "We're still going somewhere."

 _"Maybe they're using a cloaking device?"_

We tested the hot plate with a couple cans of beans. A little tricky in zero G. You don't want to make the can explode, but you don't want it spraying all over. I resorted to using a pot and holding the lid really carefully. We pretty much had to pass it around and _eat_ holding the lid down.

The moon, oddly enough, seemed to be looming closer and closer. I frowned as I watched its shadowy craters enlarging outside the window.

"Wherever we're going," Lori said. "It doesn't look like a spaceship."

"I hope it doesn't try to land. We never put in landing gears."

 _"We didn't have a problem with that before!"_

 _"We never tried to_ land on a rocky moon _before."_

Minutes later, I was looking down at long stretches of dusty gray desert pitted with craters. Whoever it was, it seemed they definitely wanted us to visit the moon. We traveled the darkened side, the one turned away from the sun.

"Why are we going here?" Lori asked.

"Don't ask me. I'm not driving."

"Maybe someone's hiding _behind_ the moon?"

 _"...Maybe."_

Gertie peered through the drier door. "Where's the flag and the moon buggy?"

"Gertie, _the moon is over two thousand miles in diameter,_ and I don't think we're in the right spot. You might as well fly over China and ask where your tricycle is."

 _"It's five thousand miles smaller than the earth!"_

 _"Fine,"_ I groaned. " _Keep looking_. But I bet you're not going to see anything."

She pointed to a car shaped blotch on the cracked terrain. If you squinted, it kinda looked like a lunar rover. "What's that, then?"

I sighed. _"It's a rock."_

She leaned against the wall, looking progressively less hopeful the further we got.

"You think they've got a moon base or something?" Lori asked me.

"Not sure."

She squinted at the dark rocky landscape. "I'm not seeing any domes."

The thunder road approached a massive crater, one that had to have been at least a dozen miles across, its sides tall and mountainous. It was into this crater we found ourselves descending.

"Oh hell no!" Lori cried. "There isn't even anything down there! What do these aliens think they're doing!"

The tall jagged sides of the crater blocked out the sun, giving it the appearance of a gigantic open toothy maw. I stared into the inky blackness with dismay. "Remember that scene from _Star Wars_? "

" _You mean when they landed inside that thing that tried to eat them?_ No. Trying not to think about it."

We entered the darkness.

"...You're right, Elliott. We _probably should_ have shut the thing off when we crossed that river."

"Yeah," I sighed. "But it's too late. If we shut it down now, this thing is going to implode."

"We're getting nearer to the dot," Gertie said. "Maybe they're hiding down there."

I swallowed. ".. _.Maybe."_

Lori took my hand, clutching it tightly.

My sister grabbed my other one. "You think we're going to see Selenites?"

I stared at her in puzzlement. "Why would we see car parts?"

"No. _Selenites_. Mrs. Sigler showed us a video about them in class. You see, _Baron Munchhausen takes a boat to the moon,_ and..."

She didn't finish. While she had been talking, the Thunder Road slowly turned around to face a rock wall, and in the headlights we could see something like a giant camera iris opening along its surface, a cloud of steam pouring out from its center.

The iris widened, and our vehicle drew closer.

Lori's grip on my hand tightened. "I sure hope whoever lives down here is friendly."

We passed through the opening, entering a large gray cave, eerily dark and empty.

The round gate closed behind us as the Thunder Road slowly settled on the floor.

 _"We're heeere..."_ Lori said in a sing-song tone like that girl from _Poltergeist_.

"...Wherever here is," I murmured.

I saw another iris door on the cavern wall ahead of us, but it wasn't open. "I...don't see anybody. What are we supposed to do? Get out and walk around?"

Lori switched on Jimmy's amplifier, speaking into the mike. "Hello? Is anyone here?"

Nobody answered.

I sighed. "Okay, we've got a scuba tank, that army surplus gas mask and one of us can wheel out an O2 unit and use it like an old lady."

The moment we had all our supplies ready and popped the lock on the door, something made a loud clank, and the iris door ahead of us gradually eased open, blinding light shining into the cavern.

I squinted as a handful of small lumpy creatures came waddling out.

Gertie let go of my hand, pressing her face to the window with excitement. _"It's ET! It's really him! And he brought friends!"_

I stared through the windshield, watching the squat figures hobble closer and closer with breathless anticipation. Soon they were at the window.

 _"Where's ET?"_ Gertie whimpered. _"Where is he?"_

Lori frowned. "He's... _not one of these guys?_ "

 _"Yeah,"_ I mocked. _"They all look the same."_

"Sorry. I... _didn't mean..._ "

None of these... _creatures_ looked anything like ET. If ET resembled an old man, these aliens were _ancient_. Tons more wrinkled, their skin had a pale tan coloration, kind of like how ET once looked when he got sick, and wispy gray hairs grew out of every place in their bodies. One was frog green colored, but the others were mostly that same pale color.

They came in different sizes, too. Short, talk, wiry, fat...in fact, some of them had odd beauty marks, stripes, splotches, leopard spots. I gave them a nervous wave.

They stretched their necks to get a better look at us, made their fingers glow.

"Can we trust them?" Lori asked.

]

The question gave me pause. "I...don't think we really have a choice."

A potbellied cow splotched alien reached for the windshield. _"Oooohhhh."_

Gertie pressed her hand to the glass, and her hand started glowing.

`Cow Spots' tilted his head quizzically, making a low moaning sound to an overweight creature next to him.

The fat one let out a low dog-like growl, and " _Uhhhh._ " The other aliens made similarly funny noises.

"Any idea what they're saying?" I asked Gertie.

My sister didn't answer, just held up a hand to tell me `wait.'

"Do you have this feeling like we're not exactly welcome here?" Lori asked.

I sighed. "I don't think we're unwelcome, I just think they're... _curious_. Or maybe _puzzled_ by us."

Most of the creatures moved really slow. ET looked like The Flash by comparison.

It seemed like forever before Gertie said anything. "They...were talking about our ship. Some of them thought it was cute. the others said we were ruining their place with trash. I tried to explain with my... _thinks_ , but I'm not sure they understood."

Splotches pointed a glowing finger at someone at the iris door, and something hummed beneath us, vibrating the whole compartment.

We were moving again, but this time by means of a conveyor, the aliens stepping aside to let us through.

"What now?" I asked.

"They... _want to examine our ship._ "

The conveyor rolled us into what I can only describe as an underground jungle. It reminded me of something out of _Land of the Lost_ or _Journey to the Center of the Earth_ , but amidst all the plants they had strange futuristic devices with crystals, monitors, and complicated wiring arrangements. Large blooming plants of every known species, a whole rainbow of different flowers, fruit bearing trees, an impressive bumper crop of every sort of plant that people live on, most notably corn, oats and wheat.

These were all earth plants. Nothing truly exotic. ET's crew had apparently been cultivating and transporting large quantities of stuff from earth, and somehow working the dead lunar soil into something fertile for it to grow in. Glowing orbs on the ceiling provided the sunlight. _They even had a waterfall_.

"It's like the Genesis cave from _Wrath of Khan!_ " Lori muttered.

Gertie nodded. "Or that place from _Troll._ "

I still saw no signs of any space vehicles other than ours, though I wasn't familiarized enough with the place to know if they had a `garage.'

The population seemed... _light_. Other than our welcoming party, I only saw one alien in the whole place, and, oddly enough, he was busy watching _The Jeffersons_ on one of the machines.

"Well," Lori joked. " _At least we've still got TV._ "

"I wonder how they get reception down here. You'd think the signal wouldn't be that great."

"You've heard of _satellite TV_ , right?...I've read somewhere that we've been beaming signals into space ever since the first televised world Olympics. Honestly, I'm surprised they haven't greeted us with _`Where's the beef?'_ "

The conveyor rolled to a stop in the middle of a clearing, before a machine that looked like a human heart. A pair of fleshy moon chairs _grew_ from it, along with two keyboards with spongy buttons that resembled octopus suction cups. The aliens had carved a pair of tall _sculptures_ out of the stalagmites around it, rather idealized versions of their species, but the size and level of detail was impressive.

Lori pointed to the machine. "What do you think that thing is for?"

I squinted at the device's screen. "They're monitoring something. Recognize the code?"

She paused to read it. "I can't believe I can actually understand what that says...well, _the gist of it,_ anyway."

Lori stared out the window. "You think it's safe to get out?"

I shrugged. "I don't know if we can breathe the air. Take the scuba gear."

Lori donned the equipment, opened the door. I and my sister held our breath, watching her climb out.

Gertie only watched for a moment before eagerly grabbing the gas mask and following her. I rushed behind with the wheeled oxygen tank and nose plug, carefully closing the ship to maintain our air supply.

It was much warmer now. The aliens had crystalline overhead plant lights and stuff that kept the place at a comfortable spring temperature.

The aliens caught up with us, making weird noises as they stared and poked our bodies.

The first thing they did was start messing with our breathing apparatuses. I pushed a slimy hand away as it attempted to remove my nose plug. "Leave that alone. I need it."

Unfortunately, they had Gertie's mask removed before I could stop them. "Hey! _She needs that!_ "

Instead of handing it back, the aliens passed it around, playing with it, trying to take it apart. I rolled the tank over to my sister to give her a few puffs, but she was already gasping in...whatever served as the atmosphere down there.

"Gertie," I cried. "Don't breathe that. Here." I offered her the tube. In her panic, she only gasped more.

Splotches held up a staying hand. _"Safe."_ His voice was deep, old sounding.

I scowled, watching Gertie take another breath.

"He's right," she said. "They breathe air too. How else could ET live with us so long?"

"Gertie, I..."

Lori took off her mask. "She's right. Look!" She pointed as a small brown rabbit emerged from a shrub.

"How did that...?"

Before I could answer, a Canada goose came waddling out from behind our ship, letting out a faint questioning honk.

I removed my nose plugs and inhaled. The air quality was actually really good, a blending of musty earth, pine and flowers, very clean, pollution free. Lori sneezed a couple times after she took off the scuba tank, but it was otherwise okay. Since everyone seemed all right, we stowed our life support equipment back in the Thunder Road.

Although I protested and told the aliens that the doors on the ship needed to remain closed, they soon had it open again, staring at the interior, sticking their heads inside. I groaned and let them do what they wanted, after all, _we were guests_.

A sudden growl shook me to attention. Gertie screamed as a red and translucent white bug the size of a Great Pyrenees burst from a thick cluster of sorghum, tackling her to the ground.

She squirmed, tried to fight it off, but before she could get away, it was shoving claws and feelers into her mouth.

My sister gurgled and flailed her arms as the bug monster stuck tentacles and small chitinous limbs in her mouth.

"Hey!" I yelled, rushing at the beast with clenched fists.

A second later, I was on the ground, the tiger striped alien faintly smiling at some private joke, one hand hidden behind his back.

I held out my hand, trying to mentally shout to the aliens, but I guess my sister was more gifted with that kind of stuff. They didn't seem to respond to me.

Gertie furrowed her brow, and for some reason, the fight left her, her hands only half heartedly raised in self defense.

As I watched more carefully, I came to the realization that the bug creature wasn't actually harming my sister, just messing around in her mouth.

Jamie gawked at the insect. "What is it doing to her?"

Gertie's eyes opened, her brow furrowing as she stared up at the thing.

"I'm...not sure," I stammered. But then something clicked in my brain. "Hey, you remember those _scavenger shrimp_ we had in the fish tank at our old school?"

 _"You think it's cleaning her mouth?"_

I shrugged.

 _"Safe_ ," the splotchy mulatto alien said in his typical slow drawl.

Lori chuckled. "This guy would make a terrible baseball umpire."

Gertie winced in pain.

"Hey!" I shouted. _"That doesn't look so safe to me!"_

I clenched my fists again, but my sister waved me off. A moment later, the creature retreated from her.

Gertie looked perplexed, fumbled for words. _"He...took out my filling...and replaced it with...something._ " She made smacking sounds with her mouth, grimacing in disgust. "It tastes like old French fries and moldy bread."

The bug thing approached Lori next. She held up her hands in protest. " _I've barely eaten anything since lunch and you want to clean my teeth?_ "

Well, I supposed, after eating all those Reese's Pieces, ET had to clean his teeth somehow.

Splotches pointed to a trail. _"Fol-low._ "

"Where are we going?" I asked. "Are you leading us to ET?"

The alien smiled stupidly at me, narrowing its slanty eyes. " _Yeah!"_

Lori frowned. "I... _kinda don't think he's leading us to ET somehow._ "

I pointed my hand at him, _thinking_ my question. He just laughed at me.

Gertie pointed her finger. It glowed for a moment, but she ended up frowning. _"I can't make it do the thing._ "

The potbellied creature moved like a turtle, which forced us to impatiently stand around and wait for him to waddle ahead. At least we had something interesting to stare at.

On the whole, their home was a masterpiece of horticulture. It reminded me of that magical tree palace from one of those _Narnia_ books. The aliens, being clever with plants, had built tunnels with carefully bent trees. The one Splotches led us through even branched out into rooms of various sizes, with furniture that appeared to be grown from the ground and shaped rather than built. If you didn't look at anything up close, you would have sworn someone had used woodworking tools, but no, not a single saw or chisel had touched it. They had stools that looked like giant mushrooms, large `chaise lounges' with an `earth chair' sort of design, grown from some exotic plant not found on earth, and the kind of strange organic bed I'd seen ET lying on in my vision.

Along the way, I spotted rabbits and squirrels and birds. At the time I had no idea how they could have possibly gotten there.

The tree corridor ended in a narrow cave tunnel that descended on a slant. I was worried about Gertie getting tired out from all the walking, but gravity is lighter on the moon, so it didn't bother her too much.

Several feet later, we reached the bottom, gazing at an unmanned command center of sorts. The arrangements resembled the monitoring station we'd seen when we'd arrived, weird chairs, spongy keyboards, but this one featured a lot of glowing crystals and crystal orbs. The equipment seemed to regulate the environment, making sure the plants had the proper nutrient levels, light and so forth, controlling the temperature, power, keeping tabs on the animals, as they had deer, panda bears, reptiles and varieties of birds I hadn't previously spotted.

Splotches glanced around the area, letting out a couple chirps and a mewling noise. When no one answered, he waved his fingers at another tunnel. " _Fol-low._ "

We descended further, entering another cavern, this one appearing to be for ceremonial or religious purposes. Around the perimeter, giant stone heads, carved to look like members of ET's race and other weirder types of aliens. At center, two weird glowing figures on rugs bowed to blank wall framed by dark obelisks resembling the Washington Monument. The obelisks had holes all over like Swiss cheese, and they burned aromatic plants at the base of each, as sort of an offering, I suppose.

Gertie squeezed my hand, and a hidden fiery symbol appeared in the air before the bowing figures, perhaps the real object of their worship. It kinda looked like the plastic thing you put on a record when it's on the spindle, but was obviously of greater mystical significance.

Our guide made the chirps and clicks again. I guess it was someone's name, because one of the bowing creatures rose to its feet and looked at us.

It seemed not everyone there was of ET's species. Chirp Click towered over all of us, being roughly the same size as an adult human being.

Its face resembled a cross between an iguana and a rabbit, weirdly shaped facial features, fins, split lip, mouth and nose protruding like a muzzle, its body, when not concealed by its slight amount of clothing, was covered in a coat of speckled brown fur. A tail flicked out the back of its loincloth.

Its companion, of ET's race, seemed unusually young, its skin orange and black like an actual tiger, or maybe an Amazonian tree frog.

I looked into the creature's goat eyes, giving her (I could only assume the gender) a wave. "Hi. I'm Elliott. Do you speak English?"

The stranger's bat ears wiggled, and it started making squirrel quacks at me.

When it noticed my disappointed expression, it waved back, responding in a croak, "Hi. Elliott."

The creature wore a thin gauzy jacket that looked like it had been made from an immense butterfly wing, a translucent shiny green material. Gertie smiled and pointed to it. "I like your outfit. It's very pretty."

Tall Thing looked puzzled. Its head fins rattled. She waved her tail, nodding toward the center of the room.

"I hope you don't want us to start bowing," Lori said.

Tall Thing only quacked at us, gesturing for us to sit in a circle around her, taking my hand with her right, Gertie's with her left. Lori held hands with me and Splotches, Gertie taking the old one's pale hands.

Our hands began glowing, and I heard a voice speaking in my brain: _My name is Rilquza. Why are you here?_

Lori frowned. _"Shouldn't you know? You're the one who brought us here!"_

"Lori," I scolded. _"Be nice. We're guests."_

I looked into Rilquza's goat eyes, opening my mouth.

Before I could say anything, I heard Gertie and Lori's voices competing with me in my head, a mishmash of confused images appearing in my mind's eye.

 _Please_ , thought the orange creature. _One at a time. Listen or qamdoji_ (unify) _the thought._

The goat eyes fixed sternly on my human eyes. _Quiet your mind._

 _You will accomplish nothing with this chaos._

We tried.

Rilquza smiled as Gertie again complimented her on her outfit.

 _We want to see ET,_ I thought.

 _We do not know who that is,_ Splotches thought more rapidly than his aged body could move.

Gertie supplied an image of ET hiding in the closet back home, partly concealed by a mountain of stuffed toys, then one where she'd dressed ET up in her girl clothes and a wig. This puzzled Tall Thing, so I gave her another image, one where ET was leading me around in a forest of California redwoods.

The orange creature stretched its neck. _You have met_ Vorxora!

Rilquza smiled at the mental images. _We are friends with him as well._

 _We call him ET, ma'am._

Tiger lowered his head sadly. _Vorxora, or ET, as you call him, is not here. He has left for Jufuceri._

I squeezed the alien's hand. "We want to go there. We _need_ to see him! Please help us!"

 _Why do you wish to go to Jufuceri?_ Splotches thought.

 _You do not belong there._

 _It is not your home._

"We don't have a home," I said. "There's bad men after us. We can't go back."

"Please, Rilquza," Gertie said. _"We love ET! He's like family. We have to see him!"_

 _It is not safe for you._

"It's not safe for us on earth," I said.

 _"Please,"_ my sister begged. _"We came all this way!"_

 _I have examined their craft,_ Splotches thought. _Their vehicle and supplies will not survive the voyage to Jufuceri._

Rilquza frowned. _Then they must go home._

"No!" I cried. _"Don't you understand what we went through to get here?"_

The tall one flinched at the barrage of memories going through our mental connection.

 _"Rilquza,_ " Gertie said. " _We can't go back_. They'll send us to _the place!_ "

I could sense the misgivings as the aliens paused to think.

At last Rilquza thought, _We must hold council. Tolmina, show them to the guest quarters. Colzest, call the others to the chamber._

[0000]

* * *

Thanks to Egbert Fitzwilly at instructables dot com for the oxygen scrubber idea.


	16. Chapter 16: Honored Guests

The orange one led us up a secondary passage, through a rock tunnel, and another corridor of bent trees. He was much more spry than his friends. I really wasn't sure the reason for this, exactly.

Along the way, we got a better look at their `jungle'. The moon's low gravity did weird things to the plants, making everything kind of deformed and heavy around the top and middle, like swamp trees in the bayou.

I frowned at my sister. "How come you're so... _unusually gifted,_ and I can't do half the stuff you do?"

She stopped and stared at me. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, you can just press your hand to a window and read the aliens' minds like it was nothing."

Gertie shrugged. "You probably could have done it too. You just didn't try because you're a fraidy cat. They were thinking really loud."

Lori looked at her skeptically. " _I somehow don't think that's all there is to it._ "

"I was _really close_ to ET. I kissed him, and, and, put him in my clothes and everything. _He liked my geraniums._ Remember how he brought that dead one back to life?"

"I was in close contact with him too," I said. "But you seem to be twice as powerful as me."

Gertie had an expression on her face like she were trying to comprehend a riddle or a difficult math problem. _"I don't know._ _I'm younger,_ and adults have to explain a lot of things to me that you already know, like looking both ways before crossing a street. I... _do things without thinking about them._ "

Lori's eyes widened. _"She lacks common sense! That's what it is!"_

Gertie still appeared to be concentrating really hard. " _...Maybe._ Rilquza... _also found it interesting that I don't think about boys._ "

"I...guess people _don't_ use their brain very much when thinking about _that._ "

Lori smirked. "There was a guy on TV talking about that, how people only use a percentage of their brains."

We passed by a path that branched off to an underground lake with the waterfall I'd seen earlier, arriving at a large hut, for lack of a better term.

It reminded me of Sukkot, you know, ` _The Feast of Booths._ '

Sukkot is a Jewish observance where you go outside, a lot of times in your back yard, and camp out in a little wooden building. People hang fruit and vegetables from the ceiling. Some can get pretty elaborate. At any rate, this is what our accommodations looked like.

 _I'd definitely call this `Sukkot' elaborate._ Actual wooden walls grown into the shape of pillars, with `carvings' of nature scenes and beings from ET's race. The furniture was a little strange, mushroom stools, couches that looked like Venus flytraps, and a long `coffee table' that appeared to be made from animal, plant and machine parts. We plucked low hanging apples and bunches of grapes from the roof, chowing down.

Lori showed me an etrog. "What is this thing? Some kind of squash? An... _alien plant?_ "

I shook my head. "It's like a lemon. Most everything I've seen here seems to be from earth... _well, except for these weird couches and stuff._ It doesn't surprise me. _We're only on the moon._ It probably takes some effort to get stuff from his planet over here."

"Where's the bathroom?" Gertie asked our orange host.

Tolmina looked confused. With a frustrated grunt, he offered a glowing finger.

Reddening with embarrassment, Gertie touched her index finger to his. After a moment of silent communication, Tolmina laughed and said, _"Fol-low."_

Me and Lori kinda had to go too, so we trailed behind, to see where the facilities were located.

Not what I expected. The toilet, if you could even call it that, resembled a pitcher plant and didn't use water-unless you counted its irrigation pipe. The seeming lack of privacy troubled us too. Like the bathroom in a barn, the walls were a little too short for comfort.

Their sink resembled a bowl, and had some type of pumice-like cleaning substance and a sponge in it, filtered pipes feeding into the pitcher plant's watering system. The water came on whenever you waved your hand in front of it. I'd never seen anything like it in my life.

My sister frowned at the pitcher plant. "I...don't like that thing. What if it eats me?"

"Gertie, I'm sure they wouldn't be telling you to do that if they didn't use it all the time."

Lori nodded. "I don't like the idea either, but I'm sure there's _tons_ of those things where we're going. We only have a limited supply of... _Depend-O's_ , and I don't think they want us to just...pee anywhere. We're going to have to get used to them eventually."

 _"Let us know if you fall in,"_ I joked.

Lori elbowed me. _"Don't say things like that! She'll never use it!"_

"This must be what parenting is like," I muttered.

At any rate, we took turns using the facilities, returning to our guest room.

During our absence, someone had set out food, all vegetarian. A loaf of bread with a bowl of spread that tasted like refried beans and peanut butter, a type of gooseberry jam, cheese, stuffed mushrooms, a variety of nuts, and, ironically enough, granola. Since she `lacked common sense', Gertie ate without questioning whether it were safe. Lucky for us, it was. We ate our fill, then, as the aliens still had not concluded their meeting, got situated for bed.

I initially thought my sister crazy for suggesting we pack swimsuits. It was all together the wrong time of year for it, and _even_ _Dad_ thought it was crazy when we asked him to buy one for Lori. But now that we had a choice between not bathing and swimming beneath a waterfall, we were glad Gertie thought of it.

The air bubbles behaved strangely in the water, but somehow, despite the moon's low gravity, the water remained in a form we could swim in.

Everything was overwhelming. Since I needed time to think about a few things, I swam away from the girls.

The water didn't go deeper than about four or five feet, but Gertie kept to the shallows. She and Lori muttered to each other as I did the back float.

Lori must have noticed something, for she paddled up to me. "What's wrong?"

I settled on a submerged boulder, letting out a heavy sigh. _"Guess."_

She frowned. " _It was your idea._ We'll probably never get to see our families again, _but what can we do?_ "

I didn't answer.

 _"That's not it, is it?"_

I slowly shook my head.

 _"Jimmy's gone. You don't have to worry about him anymore."_

 _"He beat me up and you didn't care, you just kissed him."_

 _"People can change, Elliott. I taught him a lesson, and we're friends now._ What's hating him really going to accomplish? You've got to start learning to forgive people. _He helped us._ "

"Okay, honest? I _don't_ hate him, I...just feel like the ugly kid who has to tie a steak around his neck to make the dog want to play with him. I have a captive audience. That's the only reason you're sticking around."

"Elliott, _it's not like that. I love you. I...just...love Jimmy too."_

I swam away from her.

Of course I couldn't _just leave_ my little family, so, with much reluctance, I dried off and returned to our `suite.'

Perhaps to cheer me up, Tolmina greeted me with two peace signs raised above his head, like archival footage of Richard Nixon.

Lori giggled, flashing him a similar sign. "Hey! _Peace man!"_

In response, Tolmina gave her two thumbs up like The Fonz. _"Hey..."_

I rolled my eyes.

"Well, Elliott. Here's your `Where's the beef.'"

Tolmina put his hands on his hips like the lady on the commercial. " _Where's-_ "

I waved my hand in annoyance. _"Don't do that."_

"Feel better?" Lori asked me.

I sighed. "Yeah. I guess Jimmy's not going to build a ship and come find us."

She got kind of quiet after that

Our bedding was another unusual experience. Tolmina had to open the mouths of the Venus flytrap sofa things for us, and Gertie wouldn't lay down until the alien did it first. In fact, she didn't even sleep until Lori traded beds with her. My girlfriend had originally intended to sleep on the bed that looked like a bisected yellow squash.

The furniture was comfortable, but none of us could sleep. We lay in our `beds', staring through the gaps in the roof, watching fruit bats flitting around the stalactites.

"Why do you think they have a moon base?" Lori asked me.

"I don't know, probably just in case one of their ships break down and they need to make a pit stop."

"Most of these guys seem a little... _old..."_

"I kinda think earth isn't a very popular place. To them it's probably like the middle of nowhere, and I don't imagine it's very convenient to get to. They probably don't change staff very much."

"They've been... _holding counsel_ a long time. What do you think they're talking about?"

I shrugged. "Dunno. You've noticed how slowly they talk, haven't you? Maybe some of them _think_ at that speed."

"What's so bad about us going to their planet?"

"Not sure. _They said it's dangerous._ Maybe they're worried about more than us, _maybe they think_ we're _dangerous_. What our people did to ET probably doesn't help the situation."

"I didn't see any spaceships. What are they going to do, fix up our old junker so it can travel to that other place?"

"I don't know."

Tolmina had left our company for a few minutes, probably to let us sleep, but I guess he had heard us talking, for then he came waddling in with something that looked like a snail cradled in his hands, offering it to me.

I frowned. "No thank you."

I'd been lying down at the time, so he just smiled and brought it up to my face.

I sat up with a start. "Hey! I said I don't want that!"

Tolmina grabbed my hand, talking in my mind. _This is a communication device. Please put it in your ear._

He let go, leaving me to stare at the `device.'

Its shell bore the same design I'd seen in their place of worship, some natural modification they'd made with their strange powers, I figured. When I got a good look at the slimy thing inhabiting the shell, I wished it _were_ only a slug.

the thing, although translucent and somewhat shapeless, had _six_ feelers sticking out of its eyeless head, and something like baby octopus tentacles coming out of an orifice in the center of its face.

" _You_. Want _me_. To stick _that_ in my ear."

The orange guy nodded.

As a rule, I made it a point not to touch anything in the soft bodied invertebrate family. Baiting a fish hook or eating the occasional unkosher clam was as far as I would go. This wasn't something I wanted to take chances on.

I grabbed Tolmina's 's hand, to make sure he understood me. " _You guys don't even have ears_. How do we know that thing won't hurt me?"

The alien smirked at my fearful mental images of _Star Trek_ 's ear invading space worms. He sent me a mental image of a baby octopus tentacle glowing like a finger as it gently pressed against a cartoony diagram of an ear drum.

 _"But how do you know?_ Who or what did you test it on? Aren't we the only humans that have visited you?... _Ever?_ "

 _Rilquza and other Abreyas like him have used Jandaga with no ill effect. We have also tried it on rabbits, monkeys and panda bears._

"You have _those_ here?"

He nodded. _Jandaga are vegetarian. The closest thing they come to consuming meat is devouring the secretions of other animals. Please use it. It will make our communication much easier._

Lori stared at me. "What did he say?"

I shook my head, questioningly sent Tolmina an image of Mr. Mind from one of those old _Captain Marvel_ comics. A little worm with glasses and a talk box.

Tolmina smiled. _Be nice to Mr. Mind and he'll be nice to you._

 _"_ What happens when it gets hungry?"

 _It might nip a little, but this one is well trained._ _You can coax her out. You probably won't need her in that long anyway._

I supposed, if a creature could root around in Gertie's mouth and not make her sick or injure her, it might not be so bad. I swallowed. "I think I'm going to try it."

I lifted the squirming creature to the side of my head.

The shell of the alien snail had a sort of naturally grown `hook' on it, which kept it on the wearer's ear. I think it worked so well because Rilquza had ears too.

The moment the slug thing crawled into my ear, it went crazy, poking and prodding everything, making it feel disgustingly damp. I screamed as it nipped me.

Lori jumped off her bed, rushing to my side. "Elliott!"

When she reached up to grab the thing, I stopped her. "I...don't know what it's doing, but it doesn't hurt. Sorry, I guess I panicked."

She still looked worried.

My ear filled with wet kissing sounds. "Tolmina said it... _devours secretions._..I think it's...eating wax."

She giggled. "When's the last time you cleaned your ears?"

Tolmina chuckled, indicating, perhaps, that the device was already working.

The creature oozed over my eardrum and settled there.

"Earwax is actually fatty acid and skin cells," Gertie said. "I read that in a book."

I frowned at the alien. "Um...is your device working?"

After a half minute delay, Tolmina gave me a nod. He sat down on a mushroom, making a string of purring noises.

"He sounds like the Incredible Hulk gargling with marbles," Lori commented.

 _I understand you have many questions,_ the creature translated in my brain. _Perhaps I can help._

"What do we call...your people? The ones that look like... _Vorxora?"_

 _Qulpari._

"Ask him why he's so young," Lori said.

I started talking, but the slug's shell was already flashing.

 _My parents met on the moon project. They love each other very much. I am thirty years old._

"Where are your spaceships?" I asked.

Lori leaned closer. "Ask him if he's going to improve our ship."

 _I am not allowed to show you our vehicles. We are holding counsel to determine if you are permitted to travel to our planet._

"They're holding out," I muttered to Lori.

 _They are uncertain if a warlike race like yours deserves to travel to our planet, but they admire your cleverness._

"How old is he?" Gertie asked.

"Thirty."

 _Many of my kind are over one hundred years old._

 _"He's just a kid."_

My sister smiled. "How do you make babies?"

 _"Don't ask him_ that!" I protested.

I saw a flash of a slimy egg, and... _some other things_ I wished I hadn't seen.

"Why was he bowing to a wall?" Lori asked.

 _Ponai is our God. It is not represented by graven image._ Tolmina sent me an image of the fiery symbol. _This is how you write our god's name._ In response to an unspoken question, he added, _We burn meal offerings to Ponai, the fragrance travels through the Chirqui (obelisks) to the great temple in Mezotbi._

"Why do you have all these earth plants and bunnies and stuff?"

 _Your people are destroying the planet with clear cutting and pollution. Our intent is to preserve as many species as possible before your people drive them into extinction. We grieve the loss of Dodo. The extinctions must not continue._

"How did you get them here?"

 _We have taken infant samples of the wildlife. Mostly herbivores, but we do have a sampling of more aggressive species as well._

I stared. "Herbivores? You mean like cows?"

It must have translated as "Hamburger" because he replied, _We do not eat them. They produce milk and cheese for us, and that is sufficient_.

"Have you got any whales?"

Yes. _Vorxora's crew took a male and female back to Jufuceri._

"Are you a boy or a girl?" Gertie asked.

 _"Gertie!"_ I groaned.

 _Girl._

So it's not just a name, I thought.

Lori took a seat next to the alien. "Why are you...watching TV shows?"

 _We are trying to understand your messages. They are very confusing. Perhaps you can explain a few things to us._

 _She_ led me to that machine one of the aliens had been using to watch sitcoms, putting on a recording.

The level of technology ET's people was _astonishing_. Their recording machines had the amazing power to skip commercials with the push of a button, no fast forwarding required, and they could tape multiple programs at once, on a schedule. It was kind of like a VCR but ten times better. If I read the screens correctly, they had _months_ , possibly _years_ of recordings in their crystal computer systems. The menus were all in alien writing though.

We looked at an episode of _Captain Power and the Soldiers of the Future_. Tolmina skipped ahead to the segment where you're supposed to, I don't know, _point a gun at the screen?_

 _What am I supposed to do with this?_ Tolmina asked.

I shrugged. "You might as well ask me why they put statues on Easter Island."

Tolmina asked me why they put statues on Easter Island, and what the island was, then looked disappointed when I answered.

 _So It is like the Wazlovo,_ she thought, sending me the image of an equally mystifying monument.

The alien requested explanations about one of those programs where guys sit around and talk about football highlights, then Jim Bakker's _PTL Club_ , _My Mother the Car_ , _The Flying Nun_ , and an episode of _The Facts of Life_ where Natalie hacks into the computer of a rival muffin company and steals recipes. She also asked for me to explain songs like _The Power of Love_ , _Careless Whisper_ and _You Can Go Your Own Way_.

While I was doing that, a leopard spotted Qulpari named Urdorla gave Gertie and Lori a small type of headphone you plugged into your ear, asking them to explain some other songs and programs. We couldn't explain a _lot_ of the music (Especially Led Zeppelin), even when they replayed the songs over and over. I mean, none of us could just get on a computer and search a worldwide encyclopedia for song lyrics. _"You'd have to fly down to a record store and read the album sleeve."_ I told them. Somehow the two aliens took this to mean the songs had religious meaning, you know, because they were as enigmatic as the Wazlovo.

When Tolmina showed me _The Ghost and Mister Chicken_ , I told her i was tired and went to bed.

Tolmina showed me how to `tickle' my alien earwig to get it out before it got _really hungry_.

The aliens' recording system, although advanced, had only captivated Gertie and Lori's attention for so long, especially since Tolmina asked me to kill jokes and explain really ordinary things. Urdorla led them off on a tour in the middle of a program. This is why I found them already asleep when I came back to our `booth.'

The organic couches were very soft, waterbed-like. I drifted off in minutes.

I awoke to the sound of screaming.

When I tried to get up, I found out why. During the night, the Venus flytrap things had closed on us.

Not as life threatening as I originally thought. Although the plant gurgled like it intended to swallow me whole, as soon as I panicked and started hitting it, the mouth opened and it let me go.

Lori sat up bug eyed on her own couch. "You all right?"

I nodded. "Guess it's just another thing we'll have to get used to."

For breakfast, the aliens served us... _organic juices_ , cocktails of oranges, peaches and cranberries. To be honest, too pulpy and bitter. Could have used some sugar. The meal consisted of some sort of cheese lasagne. In keeping with the vegetarian theme, I would have preferred a cheese danish and granola for breakfast, but it's bad manners to complain about what a host gives you, unless they ask you.

"I want donuts and pancakes!" Gertie complained.

I sighed. "We'll have to ask about that later. Right now, we should just accept what they gave us."

Gertie reluctantly nodded.

"You should have seen what we did last night," Lori remarked. "We picked up squirrels and birds and they didn't fight back. We pet them and everything! Animals _never_ let you get this close!"

"Well, they probably don't have any predators here, or bratty kids trying to hurt them."

The aliens' giant scavenger shrimp came into our room, pawing on our mouths. Since I hadn't brought my toothbrush out of the ship anyway, I let it clean my teeth. It was just as gross as Gertie described.

The moment we left our `suite', we found ourselves surrounded by Qulpari. They surrounded us, Rilquza standing with them, looking impassive.

For a long time, none of them spoke, they just stared at me, or made noises to each other. I didn't have the thing in my ear, so I had no idea what they were saying.

At last, Colzest (the splotchy one) approached me and said, " _Fol-low._ "

We impatiently trailed behind our slow moving guide, puzzling over the bare sections of stalagmites and moon dirt we kept seeing.

"What do you think we're doing here?" Lori asked me.

I frowned. "Dunno."

"Quiet," Colzest growled.

Lori scowled, put her hands on her hips. _"That was rude!"_

Colzest only made a snarling noise. _"Quiet! Do not talk!"_

My girlfriend raised an eyebrow. _"That's the most I've heard him say since-"_

I elbowed her. "Shhh!"

Colzest led us to a patch of dirt, handing us weirdly shaped gardening tools, a type of hoe with a short stick and roto tiller blades, a hoe with just a handle, spades with springloaded sides, and some other tools that looked pretty much like regular gardening equipment. I think he was making us use primitive equipment to make us prove how skilled we were or something. _"Work."_

 _"Seriously?"_ Lori cried.

The alien growled. _"Shut up."_

My girlfriend's face flushed red, shooting me a look that said, `Do something.'

I only replied with a shrug and a face that said `What else can we do?'

And so we silently churned up the soil with the tools, put down seed and manure where Colzest told us.

An hour later, as we took a break for water, Urdorla waddled up to Gertie, raised her hand, and slapped my sister hard across the face.


	17. Chapter 17: Throwing It All Away

Turning red on one cheek, Gertie pouted, then started crying. We all stared at the alien.

 _"Why'd you do that for?"_ Lori asked.

I frowned. "Yeah! What did we ever do to you?"

Urdorla's eyes darted back and forth. She turned to face my girlfriend. _"You...are...fat."_

It seemed they had picked up our language, more or less, and the bad parts of it, too.

And then she told me, "You will never see Vorxora. _"_

Looking like she'd eaten a mouthful of lemons, the alien waddled away.

 _"That was mean,"_ Lori said.

I gave my sister a hug. _"C'mon. I'm sure they're not all like that._ "

"What if they are?" she whimpered. "What if ET really doesn't want to see us, and this is all a big mistake?"

"Gertie, why would he tell us to come visit him if he doesn't want us to? Why would he give us all these instructions? Even if all the other ones are mean, there's no way he'll treat us like that!"

She sniffed and wiped her eyes. "You're right. I just, I don't know, I thought this place was going to be perfect and we'd never run into any problems."

 _"We're in space, Gertie,"_ Lori said. _"This isn't heaven."_

With a grumpy sneer, Colzest pointed his disproportionately long arms at the dirt. _"Work."_

Since I didn't have an alien snail in my ear, I and Lori demanded answers by grabbing his hands.

Instead of getting a response, we both received a sensation like we'd grabbed hold of an electric fence. We saw stars, blacked out for a minute, awakening on the ground.

Lori groaned as she dusted herself off. "So _that's_ what it feels like."

The alien made impatient stomps with his webbed feet. _"Work."_

We grudgingly obeyed, planting seeds for tomatoes and peppers, burying radishes and sweet potato buds.

I shoveled, watched Gertie. She seemed to have recovered from her heartbreak, becoming engrossed in playing with the dirt.

"Lack of common sense isn't a good enough description for what she has," Lori said. " _She's impulsive_. More impulsive than us. At her age, you don't get social phobias, you talk to whoever you want, presidents, celebrities, the opposite sex, you don't get scared the same way. She's also more _innocent_ than us, because she's younger, and doesn't know about grownup things. Little kids have more imagination. I bet she still believes in Santa Claus, doesn't she?"

I shrugged. "Yeah."

"So it's like Peter Pan. The more grown up you are, the less you can fly."

 _"Stop talking or go home!"_ Colzest scolded.

Me and Lori rolled eyes at each other, continuing to work. The aliens gave us baby turnips to plant, squash, blueberries and cranberries. Lunar soil is rich in iron and magnesium, perfect for those kinds of plants.

"I'm hungry," Gertie complained a half hour later. "When's lunch?"

 _"No talking,"_ said Colzest. _"Work."_

Lori scowled at him. _"Broken record."_

An hour passed, but no food came. Gertie kept complaining about being hungry.

Lori touched Colzest's shoulder. "Excuse me, sir-"

She ended up picking herself up off the ground. "Jerk!"

"Let's go back to the ship," I suggested. "We'll eat canned beans."

The moment we tried to leave, every Qulpari in the place surrounded us, long arms pointing to our patch of dirt. _"Work."_

 _"You guys could sure learn a few things about hospitality!"_

With rumbling stomachs, we reluctantly did as we were told.

Lori churned the soil, dropped in seeds. "Why do you think they're doing this?"

"I don't know. _I thought we were pretty well behaved!_ "

"Maybe they don't want us here."

"Why not _just tell us_ we're not welcome?"

"I don't know, maybe they're just upset because we shared their advanced space flight technology with other humans or something."

Gertie kept sniffing, trying to hold it together. Neither dad nor mom ever let us go hungry, not even in a religious observance like Lent or Yom Kippur.

We tried to sneak some apples out of trees, swipe some corn, that kind of thing, but the aliens used their powers to snatch the items out of our hands before we could eat any of them. The only thing we managed to get in our stomachs was a little wheat we'd gotten from rolling chaff around in our fingers. Hardly filling.

"I still don't get why they're being so mean," Lori muttered.

The sounds of munching and slurping caused me to salivate. When I looked up, _I actually saw Qulpari passing food around to each other, eating right in our presence, as if they knew how angry it would make us!_ Fruits, vegetables, breads...

"What is all this?" Lori asked. "Are they daring us to punch them or something?"

I frowned. "I...don't know."

"If they really want us to slim down, this is _not_ the way to do it."

Following the alien's directions, Lori dug a channel for the water to trickle in. "Elliott, do you think I'm fat?"

I stared. "No way! I wouldn't change a thing!"

She chuckled. "Thank you. I needed to hear that."

"I think the only reason why Urdorla told you that was because their spaceships are tiny or something."

"Tell them we'll take our own if they improve it."

Not having the slug thing in my ear, I grabbed Colzest's arm, to make the attempt.

Colzest made a noise like a gargling tomcat and stomped away. We tried to walk away too, but the other Qulpari only crowded us in and sent another one of their friends forward to boss us around, this one tall, with paisley-like markings on the chest and forehead. " _Work._ "

We planted saplings, tilled and watered.

"Lori," I said. "Who do you love more, me or Jimmy?"

The look on her face said `Jimmy.' _"Elliott..."_

Before she could say another word, a clod of dirt struck her in the back of the head. "Hey!"

Another hit Gertie, and she cried because she got some in her eye. I calmed her down, helped her rinse out the injured area. When another came flying my way, I grabbed my own dirt clod, throwing it at the nearest alien. _"You leave my sister alone!"_

The dirt clod barely grazed the alien's webbed feet. They responded by pelting us with gravel.

"Why are you doing this!" Lori shouted.

More gravel flew at us.

"What's wrong with these guys? Do they hate human beings or something?...Is this some kind of _revenge_ for what we did to them?... _Or our planet?_ "

I thought about how people mistreated ET and frowned.

Gertie cried as a rock struck her in the head.

"For old sluggish aliens, they sure got a throwing arm!"

I could take no more of this. In anger, I grabbed a rock of my own, knocking down Gertie's attacker with one well aimed throw.

Lori, seeing another Qulpari poised with a rock, pre-empted the strike with one of her own.

The rock sailed toward the face of a Qulpari with tortoise patterned skin, but stopped an inch before actually touching him. The Qulpari calmly raised a hand, and the piece of basalt spun around like the wheel of a car, or a gyroscope on fast forward, rocketing our way.

Lori raised her hands defensively, to block the flying object.

To my surprise, it stopped before making contact with her body, rebounding into the ceiling.

A stalactite broke loose, dislodging a bat.

I watched in horror as the large mineral dropped from the roof, crushing a Qulpari to death. The strangled tomcat's wail that came out of the victim's mouth would not be easily forgotten.

Mr. Paisley snarled at us, pointing down the trail we came from. _"You will never go to Jufuceri! Go back to your planet!"_

"I'm sorry!" Lori whimpered. "I didn't mean to-"

"Go!" the alien shouted.

"Fine," she spat. "Then I'm _not sorry_. You shouldn't have been playing with rocks in the first place!" She stomped down the trail ahead of us.

Gertie was crying. Even I found myself wiping my eyes as I took her hand, leading her away from the scene of the tragedy. "C'mon. I think we'll both feel better once we get some food in our stomachs."

The Qulpari blocked us in, kept us going the way we needed to go with their weirdly elongated arms, sometimes by levitating a big rock or using telekinesis to throw vines in our path when they weren't fast enough to run interception.

After being stopped by a particularly large boulder in one instance, Lori asked, "If they can do that, why couldn't they stop their friend from getting smooshed?"

"Maybe they got distracted," I suggested. "Or maybe they expected _us_ to stop it."

She sighed. "So now what do we do?"

Getie tried to apologize to every Qulpari she encountered along the way, but pretty much all of them had the same thing to say to us: "Go away," "Leave us alone," and "Go back to your planet." This made her even more tearful and sad.

Rilquza and Tolmina frowned at us as we passed, but said nothing, leaving us puzzled about their level of friendship.

At last we returned to the Thunder Road, each of us mentally debating our next move.

"We should go to Hawaii," Lori suggested. "Find an uncharted island. Something with lots of bananas and stuff we can live on."

I rolled my eyes. _"You mean like Gilligan's Island?"_

 _"Why not?_ They said _we couldn't make it to their stupid planet!"_

"I don't want to go."

 _"They'll throw rocks. They're not leaving us any choice."_

I opened the door to my ship, but just leaned on the frame. "This is too important just to give up."

"What do you want to do, risk death by flying there?"

 _"Maybe?"_ I shook my head. "We've sacrificed too much to go down without a fight. We can't just let them boss us around. we need to show them that we're serious."

She put a hand on my shoulder. "Then what do you suggest?"

I sighed through my nostrils. _"We wait."_

"So, what...are we just going to _stand around_ and let them throw rocks and dirt at us?"

"We'll stay in the Thunder Road. If it gets bad, we can switch on the bubble."

Lori swallowed. "What happens if we switch it on and it sends us straight into the arms of those army guys?"

"If they're dumb enough to do that, it'll be their fault if those army guys come up here and start doing experiments on them."

"Okay, _so they'll send us to Siberia_ , _or maybe turn it into a bomb_ _that blows us and them to bits_. _Still not fun._ "

 _"So we won't turn on the engine."_

"They'll break the windows."

 _"We'll still have the bubble."_

Lori rubbed her face in frustration. "I hope you're right about this."

I climbed in the cockpit, opening the food compartment. "So what do you want for lunch? I guess we could mix some Ramen with chicken noodle and meter-"

I couldn't finish the sentence The aliens had stolen our food. "Dammit."

Lori scowled. "They left the engine and oxygen stuff alone but gave us nothing to eat? They _really_ want us to go home, don't they?"

This new development made Gertie cry even worse. We hugged her and told her it was all right. "We'll figure out something."

"Remember when mom told us about Yom Kippur?" I said.

My sister reluctantly nodded. "Are we going to be able to _break our fast_ at breakfast?"

I sighed. _"We can only hope."_

The aliens tossed a couple rocks at our vehicle, knocking some tiles loose, cracking the glass, but otherwise left us alone. Gertie put on some Phil Collins ( _Throwing It All Away_ ) because it made her feel better. We curled up on the floor, napping a little, but it was kind of hard to do with empty stomachs.

A sudden wave of sadness brought us groaning into a sitting position. It wasn't something we consciously thought about, _someone was broadcasting it into our brains, so we could all feel it_.

We got up, staring around the spiderweb crack in the window.

We were witnessing a sort of _funeral procession_ , all of the Qulpari slowly waddling like penguins in a line, levitating the mutilated corpse of their fallen comrade with their psychokinetic powers.

The aliens looked at us with sad accusing faces. We nonverbally telegraphed `I'm sorry,' but it didn't seem to help. As we waited for this strange procession to pass, Gertie buried her face into my clothing and sobbed.

As soon as the waddling group had gained a fair distance from us, I got out of our vehicle, trailing behind.

"You sure this is a good idea?" Lori hissed to me. "I mean, they _were_ trying to stone us to death!"

"You think that would stop Captain Kirk? _I'm going where no man has gone before._ "

"All right," she muttered. "Make that ` _no one.'_ "

"Actually, I was thinking more along the lines of ` _nobody_ ,' or ` _no person._ '"

We ducked behind a bush when we noticed a Qulpari looking our way.

 _"Nobody_ ought to keep his mouth shut!"

I pantomimed zipping my lips.

The Qulpari had taken the body down a cave tunnel beside the waterfall, one they hadn't shown us before. The speleothems had been carved with the Qulpari god symbol, and graven images of their kind, and alien style `arabesques'.

This _was_ a burial chamber. Around the curve of the tunnel, we began to see... _pieces of art_ crafted from hundreds of alien bones, like French catacombs and dark ages cathedrals I'd seen on TV. It was the kind of thing Geraldo or some news guy would use for a Halloween special.

Since the slope and curve of the tunnel gave us sort of a balcony view of the place, we hid behind the pillars and watched the happenings below.

The procession had stopped in a giant cenote of sorts, an eerie glowing light shining down like the sun from above. The light was so intense that it made the lake water look like glow in the dark paint.

We stared as the Qulpari laid their dead friend in the water with their long ape's length arms.

Rilquza stood among them, uttering soft squirrel quacks.

"What do you think they're doing?" I asked Gertie as I watched them wading in with the body, placing their hands on it.

Each of the Qulpari came forward, one at a time, to place hands on the victim, making strange sounds. I thought I heard Lori whispering to me, but I was too fascinated by the ceremony.

"I...don't know," my sister muttered. " _It's a funeral. Seems like...funeral stuff._ "

Lori tugged on my shirt. "Elliott!"

I glanced over her way and nearly jumped out of my skin.

A Qulpari had snuck up on us without a sound, and was now staring at us, bug eyed, not difficult for creatures that already had giant sized eyeballs, but at the moment this one's seemed... _more so_.

I thought for sure the stranger would attack us, but instead he grudgingly pointed to the water, nodding his head that way.

With much nervousness, we followed him, wading into the glowing pool. I thought they'd resent us for polluting the place with our unwashed clothing and dirty shoes, but the aliens did not scold us. Instead, they moved aside to let us in.

Me, my sister and Lori found ourselves in tears as we touched the poor dead creature.

"I'm sorry," Lori said. "We didn't mean for this to happen."

Gertie was too emotional to even say anything. She just cried.

"I didn't even know him, but I wished I could have!" I sobbed. "I mean, sure, he would have just thrown rocks at me, but..." I couldn't finish the sentence. The guilt and sadness choked me up too much.

We grieved for what felt like several minutes, the aliens making weird chanting sounds.

Eventually I got tired and took my hand away. "I'm going back to the ship."

The moment I waded backwards, one of the Qulpari growled, " _Stay_."

I laid my hand on the corpse again.

More chanting.

Something wet and sticky oozed over my hand like chicken fat. I shuddered as the creature's flesh crumbled and melted beneath my fingers.

And then, more horribly still, I noticed something wiggling within the body, as if trying to get out.

To my shock and absolute disgust, the aliens peeled more of the disintegrating skin away, pulled out rib bones, frantically trying to help... _this wiggling thing to get out._

And then I saw it, a pale smiling thing resembling an axolotl with fins, catfish whiskers and tentacles. The rest of its body squirmed out, scaly, glowing, multiple finned bluegill tail... _and then it did a dolphin jump, and a pair of wings unfurled from its back._

The strange creature flapped into the air, hovering above us for a moment, making noises to its comrades.

It zoomed into the light.

 _"Go,"_ Colzest growled.

 _"Go home now,"_ said Tolmina.

 _"Go home,"_ the other aliens repeated.

We glumly obeyed, marching back up the tunnel.

"What do you think that...creature was?" Lori asked as we gained distance from the burial chamber. "The alien's soul?"

I frowned. "I...don't think it's a soul. I mean, when ET died, _he just came back,_ he didn't turn into anything. I never saw a ghost."

 _"Did he have access to a glowing lake?"_

"Well... _no..._ but I kinda don't think that's what we saw."

"You think it's some kind of _mutation?_ _Or a baby of some kind?_ "

"Tolmina said she had a mother and a father, so they probably don't birth from dead bodies."

"Maybe that's just something that happens to them when they get to a really old age," Gertie suggested. "Maybe their bodies just get wore out and so this other thing comes out."

The moment we got within sight of the thunder road, a lion jumped out in front of us and roared.


	18. Chapter 18: Test

The lion quickly padded closer.

"Run," I gasped.

Lori, as they said on _Ghostbusters_ , appeared to be "Terrified beyond all rational thought," so I repeated myself louder.

We fled blindly in a random direction, shoving through the vegetation, enduring the slapping sting when we caught a branch or a stalk of... _something or another_ on the rebound.

When we thought we had gained a safe distance, the lion would bound a little and catch right back up to us.

And then Gertie tripped over a rock and fell to the ground.

The lion jumped up to her with a predatory look on its face, and I thought a noticed a spot of drool creeping out of the corners of its mouth.

All of a sudden, Lori just snapped. With a brazen disregard for her own safety, she leapt between Gertie and the lion, screaming in the big feline's face. _"You leave her alone!"_

To my utter surprise and astonishment, _the lion actually looked scared_ , and bounded away from us like someone's pet cat terrified by a fireworks show.

Lori stared. "Wow, I didn't think that would actually work!"

I helped my sister to her feet. "They've been grabbing animals and stuff from a very young age. I think you'd describe that as `bred in captivity.' It probably doesn't know how to behave in the wild."

We stood, conveniently enough, in a patch of corn. Since ET's friends had become so inhospitable, we decided it fair to shuck the plants and see if any were ripe enough to eat. A lot of them turned out to be green, but we found a couple that looked good. Me and Lori gave those to Gertie, so she wouldn't cry so much. We also got her a cucumber. It had a little dirt on it, but she was so hungry that didn't care, devouring it like an apple. Me and Lori ate bell peppers. We drank water from an irrigation channel.

When we returned to the Thunder Road, we found Colzest standing by the door with his arms crossed. _"You have failed the test."_

 _"What test?"_ Lori shouted. _"The nearly starving to death test?_ Or _that one where you were trying to stone us to death?_ Or was it that last one where _you tried to feed us to a lion?"_

Making that gargling marbles sound, the alien waddled away into the jungle.

Since we seemed to have outstayed our welcome, Gertie boldly played with the heart/computer thing we'd parked in front of...well, until someone shut off its power from another location.

 _"So this was a test,"_ Lori grumbled as we climbed back into the ship.

I slumped into a car seat. "Yeah. _And we failed._ "

 _"What were they testing us for, exactly?"_

"I...don't know. At least we know they weren't treating us like crap for no good reason."

"How were we supposed to pass a test we knew nothing about? It doesn't make sense!"

"Maybe it's something psychological. You know, like _a study._ "

 _"You don't fail a study. You publish the results in a textbook."_

 _"So it's a different kind of study._ I read about this one company president that took his job applicants out to dinner. He watched the guys to see which ones put seasoning on their meal before trying it out. The guys who were open to new experiences _would actually taste it first_. He hired them instead of the guys that came to the table with their opinions already formed."

"So what would _attacking your employees_ tell you about anything?"

"I...have no idea."

"Well, you heard him. _We failed_. We might as well leave."

I shook my head. " _We're sitting on a conveyor._ You'd think they would have just rolled us back out if they really wanted us gone. We don't even know what they're testing, or what failing it means. _Maybe they'll let us re-take the test._ "

 _"And get hit by rocks again?_ I'm sorry, Elliott, _I'm out!_ "

I swallowed. _"Do you really want to go back?"_

Lori sighed. "Not really. But I'm not going to stay if they're going to keep torturing us."

"Then stay in the Thunder Road. I'll...figure out how to get you food and stuff."

She frowned. " _Elliott, if they attack us again, I'm flying this thing to Hawaii,_ with or without you."

I stared. It didn't look like she was joking. Honestly, I didn't blame her. "Fine. I hope it never comes to that."

 _"I hope so too._ "

Since our rest had been interrupted by the funeral and the lion, we tried to recover our sleep. Not the greatest place to rest, to tell the truth.

I climbed out and sat on the ground, watching the animals.

A calico patterned Qulpari waddled up to me. Instinctively, I flinched and raised my hands, expecting another thrown rock.

 _"Safe,_ " the alien said. " _No harm._ "

I shakily let my guard down, let him come closer, allowed his slimy fingers to touch my temples.

 _How many cows have you eaten?_ he (Oznobli) asked in my mind.

"Since I've been alive?" I said. "Or just this year?"

I felt an emotion of disgust and recoil at what I was about to say in response, ` _All of them_ ,' and ` _I'm so hungry, I'm ready to add another to the total_ ,' so I verbally answered, "Cows are big, so probably at least two or three large ones every year I've been alive."

The alien answered, _You will not get any more. If their taste makes you salivate, you should go home_.

"I'm Jewish. I'm okay with dietary restrictions."

 _I do not know `Jew.'_

"It's a race of people."

Oznobli seemed bewildered with the associated mental images, Tallits, Shofar, bearded guys in black hats...

 _We have no `Jew' here. No humans. You will be alone. You should leave._

"No. I'm staying."

I kind of wished he'd just hit me with a rock. A flood of emotion rushed through my mind, all sorts of painful thoughts and memories, more or less everything that could possibly make me homesick. A memory of mother during that fateful Halloween when ET showed up, worried sick, when I ran away from home to help the alien, screaming when she found her son being menaced by a deadly space creature. All that pain, all that sadness I caused her when she found me getting sick like ET. Mom had a slight problem with alcohol, but Oznobli glossed over the bad things, making me feel as bad as possible about leaving.

Thoughts about my dad and brother came to mind. They probably went to jail or some military compound. Mental pictures formed, of them, mom and other family members looking sad, thinking I'm dead.

"Stop!" I cried, pushing the alien back. I walked away from him with tears in my eyes.

This must have satisfied Oznobli, for then he just told me, " _Go home"_ and waddled off.

"What was _that_ about?" Lori asked from the spaceship door.

I didn't answer, I just cried.

Lori came down and hugged me.

"He... _got in my head._ He was trying to make me want to go home. It kind of worked."

She patted me on the back. "You said it yourself. If you go back, you'll just end up in _the place._ "

 _"I know. It just hurts."_

Hearing something disturbing the dirt, I looked down and saw a couple giant sized turnips bumping against the hull of our vehicle.

I looked up just in time to see Urdorla shuffling into the foliage.

We found a few more vegetables hidden elsewhere. _We had dinner,_ in other words.

There wasn't much for us to do. We made experimental forays into the aliens' jungle, but found ourselves being driven back by grumpy aliens or the wildlife. Lori almost got bitten by a snake. We ended up huddling around the spaceship, hiding whenever anything rustled the foliage.

"This is boring," Gertie complained about a half hour later.

Lori gave her an incredulous look. "Seriously?"

"You can't expect to have fun every minute," I said.

 _"We haven't had fun here at all!"_

 _"I...I know,_ but that's life. We gotta _have patience and put up with a few things_ if we want to get anywhere."

Lori, thinking quickly, pointed to a black and white shape. "Hey Gertie! There's that goose again!"

My sister smirked. "You think he's looking for crumbs?"

"I don't know... _What do you think his name is?"_

"...Uncle Featherpants."

And so we kept her and ourselves busy watching the jungle and naming animals for awhile.

The fun ended when Gertie pointed at a squashy shape and said, "Mr. Meanie Head."

It was Oznobli again.

Instead of looking angry or annoyed with us, he now had a rather sad looking expression on his face. He pointed to Gertie, waving her closer.

The alien touched her temples, gazing into her eyes.

When he let go, my sister burst into tears. _"I wanna go home!"_

We hugged her, tried to calm her down, but she just kept saying she wanted to go home.

Worse, when we let go, she switched the ship's engine on. I and Lori jumped in just seconds before it took off.

The Thunder Road appeared to have a mind of its own. The moment we rose in the air, I saw the map again, and our programmed course.

It pointed straight back the way we came.

"Gertie! No! What did you do!"

My sister pushed buttons on the keyboard, but they did nothing to stop the ship from moving. _"All I did was turn it on! I promise!"_

"Figures," Lori muttered. "They _are_ going to send us back into the arms of those soldiers."

Gertie, probably due to hopes of going home, had stopped crying for a moment, but now she cried worse.

We were leaving the place, one way or another.

Thinking quickly, I pushed her aside, opening the engine cabinet. _"Brace yourselves, guys, this is going to hurt!"_

I pulled out all the important wires and our vehicle smashed down on the lunar soil. Well, as much as a vehicle can smash in that level of gravity.

 _"I wanna see mommy,"_ Gertie sobbed. All we could do was hug her.

Through the window, I noticed we had an audience. The expressions on their faces were so grave that I thought we'd killed someone else, but when I got out, I didn't see anything but broken asbestos shingles.

"Elliott! What's going on!" Lori called out the door.

The moment she came outside, a group of Qulpari surrounded _Lori_ , touching their hands to her forehead, _and then she was_ crying.

She climbed in the Thunder Road, plugged in the wires, then sat down and wept.

I held her. "We all knew this wasn't going to be a vacation."

Lori sniffed, wiped her eyes. "I...think I need to be alone for awhile."

She got out of the ship, marching off down a trail.

I didn't bother following because I figured she needed the space, and where was she really going to go?

Still, I didn't let Lori completely disappear from view. I kept an eye out for her, in case she got in trouble, ran into the lion again or something.

Tolmina came up to me with a potted plant. A pathetic ugly looking flower with two wilting blooms and a couple baby buds struggling to open. " _Ugh!_ Why are you bringing me that?"

The alien pressed it into my hands. _"Care."_

"I think she wants you to fix the plant," Gertie said.

"You have _got_ to be kidding!"

 _"Care,"_ Tolmina repeated, loping away.

Sighing, I thought back to all those plant books I've read and set to work on it, improving the soil, trimming, giving it plant food and water...the place _did_ have some good plant lights already...

I could barely see Lori at this point, so I followed her a bit. Gertie kept close to me, eyes searching, like I was, for any new predator that might be lurking, a tiger, alligator, whatever.

About halfway down the trail, I saw Lori marching our way with a weird white object perched on her shoulder. When she came closer, I saw it was that axolotl thing that had come out of the dead alien. "I don't think this guy is a ghost. I just fed him two apples."

The creature smiled, flapped over to me, rubbed up against my neck.

"He seems... _friendly_ for someone we just murdered."

"I don't think he remembers anything. Maybe it's a blessing in disguise...any sign of the Cowardly Lion?"

I shook my head. "Feel any better?"

"...Not...really...Are we going to be vegetarian from now on?"

 _"Looks like it."_

"Chickens _are_ kind of cute..."

"Maybe since we showed them we're serious, they want to show us they're serious too. That's why they're reminding us of home and everything."

The flying fish thing continued to be our companion for some reason. It kind of made us feel guilty, but we took friends where we could find them.

"We should give him a name," Lori said.

"It probably already had a name."

She sighed. "I doubt it remembers."

"Charles," said Gertie.

Lori chuckled. _"Brings a new meaning to the phrase, `Sorry, Charlie.'_ "

"Tolmina gave Elliott a plant," Gertie announced.

Lori chuckled. "What for? Is this a botany exam now?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. They just told me to care for it."

"Maybe we _can_ retake their test."

We found a strange looking basket waiting for us at the ship. I suppose you'd describe it as a cornucopia, except the cone-like thing stood like a vase. I don't think a human being could make something like it without toppling over. The object contained a bunch of raw produce, vegetables, fruits, beans, a few mushrooms, and a mixture of nuts.

Lori peeled a banana. "Does this mean that we passed?"

I shook my head. "You'd think they would have put us back in that hut, or talked to us about going to their planet if we passed. I don't know what this means, except maybe that they don't want us to starve to death."

She opened a pouch of seeds she found in the bottom. "Are they expecting us to _plant_ these?"

I looked. They definitely didn't look like the edible kind. "I...don't know. Maybe part of the test is seeing if we can grow our own food?"

 _"We'll starve before anything grows out there!"_

I ate an apple. "Let's worry about that later. Right now, they've fed us, and basically given us dessert."

Charlie sampled some of our food. Gertie was okay with it, sharing everything. Me and Lori decided to go along with it too, since we relied on the aliens' generosity.

After resting awhile, we went back to the plot of ground we'd been working earlier, planting the seeds. Nobody stopped us, strangely enough.

The aliens stared at us as we worked, probably because they hadn't seen us do things voluntarily, or for survival.

Charlie tried to help us, but his little baby arms couldn't do much of anything useful. He kept getting in the way. As annoying as it was, we didn't scold him, out of respect to our hosts.

Lori gawked at the plot we'd been working earlier that day. _"How is that even possible?"_

I looked where she pointed and saw a bunch of green sprouts already poking out of the ground.

"Didn't we just plant seeds there a couple hours ago? There's _no way_ they could have grown that fast!"

"You think they switched them out while we were... _sitting out for penalty?_ "

Lori had an expression on her face like she thought that's what they did, but gave me another possible explanation. "They can make rocks float, get in your head, and _control vines_. Who knows what else they can do?"

"ET made my dying geraniums bloom all by themselves," Gertie said. "He didn't switch the dirt or anything."

I raised an eyebrow. "That's a very good point."

"All right." Lori broke up an untouched patch of dirt. "Let's make sure we have lunch tomorrow."

And so we farmed.

Hours later, weary from our labors, we came back to the Thunder Road to rest.

Upon our arrival, Oznobli, the paisley guy, gave Gertie a potted tomato plant, one just barely beginning to grow. " _Care._ "

 _"But I just farmed!"_ she complained.

"Take it," I urged. "At least you have an easy plant."

Lori nodded. _"And it can make food!"_

Lori received a _fern_. I think the aliens kinda had opinions about who was the best horticulturist.

I thought I would get to rest when I returned to the ship, but no, Tolmina threw a potato at my head. I blocked it.

He used his powers to fling it back at me. I blocked it again.

Tolmina tried to hit me once more. It was like we were playing some weird version of ping pong.

After about the fourth or fifth time of blocking the potato (it must have been _way_ underripe), he stopped the spud in midair. "No."

He flung the tuber at me again, prompting me to block in the same way.

 _"No."_

A I'd gone through a few more rounds of this game, he growled " _Fail,_ " walking away.

"These guys are crazy," Lori muttered.

 _"No kidding!"_

This time, I was dead tired, so I had no difficulty catching shut-eye.

The following morning, we found Tolmina and Rilquza standing outside our spaceship door.

Tolmina threw a potato at my head again. I blocked, and he said no.

"What do you want me to do!" I shouted.

When he flung it back again, I got mad, and...somehow used my mind to _bunt_ it away from myself.

He served to me a couple more times. Each time I got a little bit better at it, gaining control of the ability instead of merely using it for self defense. Of course, the nosebleeds and headaches appeared to be unavoidable. The potato struck me as I was wiping my nose.

 _"Fol-low,"_ the aliens said in unison.

Lori sighed. "Great. Now what."

"I...don't know."

A tree corridor ran parallel to the main entry airlock and its stone walls. We followed this path for several yards, arriving at a strange sort of... _garden_ , this one bearing a crop of massive plants that appeared to be cousins of that monster from _Little Shop of Horrors_.

Seemingly at random, Rilquza and Tolmina paused in front of one, chanting and stretching out glowing hands.

It was more than a plant. To my absolute astonishment, I saw the giant leaves unfurling to reveal a pale almond shaped... _thing_ the size of a dump truck.

It looked like a _spaceship_ , but one they had somehow _grown_. Its wings resembled enormous leaves, a big stem-like fin ran along its veiny dome, and two large spheroids grew from its sides like _pods_.

Tolmina opened a hatch on the side of the object, gave all three of us an expectant look.

 _"Pack."_


	19. Chapter 19: Complicated

_"Pack,"_ Lori repeated. "What, are they sending us home in that thing?"

I frowned. "Why would they do it this way? I mean, granted, our ship is a little... _busted up_ , but you'd think they'd just, you know, _fix it_ and send us on our way, right? It's not like the earth is that far away..."

Lori looked unconvinced. _"Maybe they just want to give us a choice on where we get dropped off."_

"We should ask them to drop us off in Thighland," my sister suggested. "I've never been there."

"It's _Thailand_ , Gertie," Lori corrected. "And it's probably not a good idea for us to visit populated areas, especially ones that might not be a democracy. _In the South Pacific, though, it would be warm all the time. We could go swimming..._ "

"But what about _hurricanes?_ Or _volcanoes?_ "

"Gertie, don't be a party pooper. I'm sure it'll be perfectly safe."

The look on my sister's face told me she disagreed.

"C'mon, guys," I said. " _We don't even know where we're going yet._ Let's just get our things together."

Lori peered through a hatch on the side of the strange vehicle. "It looks like a greenhouse in here!"

"You probably shouldn't go in there yet," I warned. "They might get the wrong idea and take off."

"You think they'd... _just do that? Without you?_ "

 _"It looks like there's other ships."_

Lori quickly stepped back. "Guess we'll be seeing the inside soon enough anyway, right?"

We walked back up the path at an awkward pace. The excitement of a new adventure made us hurry, but the uncertainty, doubt and dread of being placed somewhere where a government could lock us up forever made us lag and slow down.

We found the other aliens waiting for us at our vehicle. Upon seeing us approach, one of them took initiative and started floating our food basket down the trail.

Colzest stepped forward, offering me the ear snail. I put it in.

 _We are sorry we treated you shamefully,_ he said with gurgling sounds. His companions bowed their heads in agreement.

 _We have seen how your species behaves toward nature,_ and _each other. Your people have_ sciences _devoted to murder. You imprison animals in large buildings and slaughter them by the million. Worse, you have created atomic weaponry and biological agents for the purpose of destroying each other. We did not want to allow any of that violence or aggressiveness to travel to Jufuceri._

"What did it just say?" Lori asked me.

"They're...saying... _we're violent_ , and they wanted to see if... _we'd attack if provoked?_ "

 _"Can't say I_ wasn't _thinking about it..."_

"I was only thinking about running away," said Gertie.

Lori rolled her eyes. _"That explains so much!"_

 _Please understand that we did not enjoy abusing you,_ Oznobli said. _By doing this, we ourselves have become diminished. We just feared that, if sufficiently provoked, perhaps even by words, you would lash out against us with violence._

Urdorla looked sad. _We do not deserve to return home._

 _We read your dreams while you were sleeping_. _You enjoy violent_ `entertainments.' _Soldiers and A-Teams that do hurtings and karates, and make large booms with weapons, or vampires and scary monsters that kill._ Oznobli pantomimed stabbing with a knife.

 _You failed the test,_ said Colzest. _But we realized that this is not your fault. You are still young. You merely need to be taught that there are alternatives. Tolmina and Rilquza are wise beyond their years. They will teach you vuxbapi, the way._

My eyes widened in shock. _"You mean we're actually going to Jufuceri?"_

Urdola nodded. _You risked life and limb to save Vorxora. This is the least we can do._

 _You are no longer safe among your people,_ Colzest agreed. _It saddens us to further separate you from your family, but we do not know how else to help you. I need not remind you that Vorxora nearly died last time he encountered your people. Our powers are just not as strong on your world._ Something is wrong with the air...

Lori didn't catch a bit of that. "What did they say now?"

"...They say they're sorry we can't be with our families, but they can't stop those people who are after us. There's...too much pollution or something."

We stuffed our things into backpacks, clothes, the flashlight, Gertie's tape deck... _`toiletries,'_ admittedly, we hadn't brought that many things, and since the food had gone missing, even less than that. I frowned at our homemade oxygen scrubber. "You think we should bring this stuff along too?"

"Why?" Lori asked. " _These guys obviously breathe the same stuff we do._ "

"Yeah, but, _I dunno_... _What if we run into some kind of situation-"_

 _"Okay, so take them..."_ And then, perhaps to herself, she muttered, "I would have liked to take more clothes..."

With the backpack slung over my shoulder, I lugged my aquarium down to the aliens' ship.

Tolmina stared. _That's a nice plant sample you have there. What are all those objects you've stuck around it?_

"Breathing equipment."

She scratched her head. _Did you intend to explore the volcanic rift? If so, I am..._ not certain your equipment is adequate for the task.. _._

I sighed. "You're right. I don't know what I'm doing. I'll take it back."

 _No. Please bring it along. It is a curious artifact. The method of manufacture is fascinating, and the plants seem to be well maintained. They could be an important food source for you, and our researchers will enjoy the sample._

I looked at her like she were crazy, but went ahead and brought it into the craft.

Lori was right. The ship _did_ look like a greenhouse.

The entire vehicle had been built around what appeared to be a large tree, with consoles of glowing things resembling crystals and glass mushrooms. In a fashion similar to our `guest booth', food bearing plants covered much of the walls and ceiling. The cockpit had a big window, invisible from the outside, and its computer had red octopus sucker buttons, framing a hexagonal screen.

You generally expect an alien spacecraft to have a lot of metal in it, but the bulkheads on this one just consisted of some kind of glowing, pulsating plant matter, broken up here and there by smooth divider sections that reminded me of what you see when you crack open a pumpkin seed. The floor itself had the texture of the meat you get after scraping the guts out of a pumpkin.

I nearly tripped over a soup can.

Looking down, I saw that the aliens had piled our food supplies around the entry hatch. I guess they weren't sure where we wanted to store them or something. It appeared, even if we ran out of the aliens' crops, we'd have the food situation covered.

"Their computer looks like a pizza," Lori joked as she climbed aboard with the scuba tank. She looked down. "So _that's_ where they took our stuff!"

"What are you doing with _that?_ " Tolmina asked me when I brought in the diapers. When I explained their function, she laughed and showed me the ship's toilet.

"Great! I _was_ hoping we wouldn't need them."

It didn't take us long to pack what remained of our material possessions.

I had no idea my flower counted as one of these until Oznobli called to me and pushed it into my arms. The aliens brought Lori and Gertie their plants as well.

We said our goodbyes to the aliens. I and Lori just kinda shook hands with them, gave them a deep nod, sort of like a bow of respect, but Gertie was a hugger. You may wonder how someone who got pelted with rocks could hug her attackers, but when she hugged them, I could hear her saying, "I understand now. You really didn't like what you had to do. We can still be friends," and things like that.

Inspired by the sight, some of the aliens we shook hands with also gave me and Lori hugs, or touched glowing hands to our faces in a gesture of affection.

Our crew for this journey, it would appear, consisted of Rilquza, Colzest and Tolmina. Rilquza and Tolmina took command chairs at the front computer, directing us to sit in the organic moon chairs behind them. Colzest, in the meantime, occupied himself with crystals around the tree.

It appeared these weren't our only companions for this journey, for as the ship's hatch closed, the strange fish thing came flying in.

"Charlie!" Gertie exclaimed.

The creature flew over and nuzzled her, eventually settling into her lap.

The aliens activated the hexagonal screen, displaying symbols I, Lori and my sister had become thoroughly familiar with during the construction of the thunder road.

Other than a slight hum at ignition, the ship made no sound as it slowly rose into the air, flying out of their `vehicle bay' and into the jungle. Through the large window, we could see the other Qulpari waving to us, some smiling, a few even appearing to cry.

'You think they're happy to see us go?" Lori asked.

Gertie shook her head. "I think some of them are smiling because they know we'll always be in their heart."

We took one last wistful look at the Thunder Road, our little piece of history, _and home_ , as the alien ship passed through the iris hatch, entering the outer cave that served as their airlock.

The second iris opened, and our vehicle shot out of the darkened crater, into space.

 _"I can't believe it,"_ Lori breathed. _"We're actually doing this."_

"You left that thing in your ear," Gertie said to me.

"No one said I couldn't keep it. I might need it later."

 _It is yours,_ Colzest said. _Few of our kind can speak your language_.

"Can _I_ wear it?" Gertie asked.

Lori made a face. "That's gross."

 _"What? It cleans out your ears..."_

As if understanding, the Jandaga bit me. I coaxed it out of my auditory canal, handing it over.

Gertie put the creature in her ear. "When are we going to see _Mars?"_

All I heard was a gargling sound. "What did he say?"

"We're... _in the wrong part of the orbit?_ They say our models are too simple. The planets only... _align...once every...five hundred years?"_

More gurgling sounds.

"She says we _might_ see _Saturn_ and _Your Anus."_

 _"It's yoo-ran-us, Gertie_ ," Lori corrected.

"Yeah...oh, and we'll see _the asteroid belt between Mars and Jupiter."_

Charlie flapped himself airborne, perching on Gertie's chair.

"Do you always turn into something like Charlie when you die?" She asked the aliens.

I kinda wanted the translator back, or one of my own, because I only got a bunch of noise.

"Well?" Lori asked.

"They can only... _zaywoj_...once in a lifetime...and they need a pool. _It's... taken them a long time_ to grow the right stuff to make the one on the moon work. _Zagiwra_ means 'healing,' I think. Makes sense because I got the water on the spots where their rocks hit me and they felt better right away."

Gertie asked if we'd get to meet Yoda or Spock or Chewbacca, but you can guess the answer to that.

Obviously, if you see an alien in a movie, and it's popular enough for people to make Halloween costumes for it, you're probably not going to see something like it in real life. She might as well have asked to see Cookie Monster or Montgomery Moose from the _Get Along Gang._

"Are we going to see anything scary? Like that alium that comes out of people's chests?"

They didn't exactly say no. What I got from Gertie was, "They... said not to eat everything you see, or drink water in certain places, and, and... and be careful where you step barefoot."

"I'm not sure they're talking about the same thing," Lori said. "That sounds like what they tell you about parasitic infections."

"The movie _was_ technically about a parasite," I pointed out.

Now, I had placed my flower among the other things along the bulkheads, but now Colzest held it in his hands, offering it to me.

"No thanks," I said.

I got gargled at. He pantomimed... _stroking the leaves...singing to it_.

 _"Seriously?"_

Gertie giggled. "Remember that Sweet Pickles book about the gardener bunny? They thought he was crazy because he played records to his plants, but they grew bigger than the other guy's..."

I noticed Lori smirking. _"I_ have _heard that the vibrations of your voice, and music might affect plants."_

Rolling my eyes, I held the pot, staring at the flowers. "This is ridiculous. It doesn't know anything." Just to humor the alien, I said, "Hi, plant."

Lori and my sister ended up holding their plants, too. Gertie _loved_ to talk to hers.

Much to me and Lori's chagrin, the aliens had us babying our plants all the way to our destination.

 _"Thomas Edison,"_ Lori said out of the blue.

I stared. "What?"

"That story you told me. It was Thomas Edison. He gave people soup and watched to see who would put salt on it. It wasn't just some generic company president."

"Well, _you got the idea._ "

Gertie grabbed several bananas off the wall, gobbled down one, then another.

"Keep eating those," Lori joked. "And you'll start looking like a monkey!"

"Great! I wanna have a tail just like Rilquza. It's so pretty."

Rilquza laughed because the translator was still in.

"How come ET's spaceship looks like a big red Christmas ornament but this one looks like a seed?" Gertie asked.

The aliens answered that Vorxora's spaceship was designed to transport large plants and animals, and ours was more like a family sedan.

"What's it like on your planet?"

She got a long series of noises in response. The translation, "They...don't have violent...or... _aggressive_ sports. The most popular game is like... _golf_. They...catch and throw _a birdie_ with a _scoop,_ and _run to a base to drop it in..._ but it's not a base `cause it's got ten holes, and...a skeeball thingy at hole eleven. _And there's trivia._..And, and, nothing's hom-hom-homo-genized. No cash registers, either."

 _"Sounds like a flea market,"_ Lori groaned. _"With the barter system._ "

Gertie seemed a little confused about that too. "And they have something called a Takofuea, kinda monastery place, except you crawl through tunnels."

Lori rolled her eyes. " _Whee fun._ "

"Anyways, they said you won't really get a good picture until you see it yourself."

"How come they don't _show us_ pictures then? I'd like to see this... _`game.'"_

Gertie asked about it, and the aliens showed us a different game, one where the Qulpari floated in zero gravity, herding color coded animals into corrals."

"Is it hot or cold there?" she asked. "Do we need coats? Are there nice places to swim? What kinds of foods do you have? Anything sweet like candy? Do you still have dinosaurs? Do you have anything like TV? How do you make babies? Do you have any fun holidays? Do you have kinds and queens or just a president? Do you have rock stars or movie stars? What kind of animals do you have there? Are any of them really dangerous? Do you have TV shows of your own or do you just watch ours?"

Rilquza chuckled and gave a response that seemed shorter than the others, but a little longer than my sister's translation.

"Boy, that was a quick answer for all that!" Lori said.

"He said I'll find out when we get there."

Gertie asked the aliens what their names meant. It didn't exactly surprise me when they said they all had something to do with plants from their planet. They actually _had_ some Tolmin and Colzite growing in a delicately maintained vault near their communal burial chambers.

"Do you have any bad people?"

The answer we got was some, but most of them they reformed by placing in something called Takofua and teaching them vuxbapi, which means `value.'

"What does your God look like? Do you have any pictures of him?"

The aliens answered that their god was not a he or a she, it was an it, and they didn't have a picture because it was unknowable.

Colzest gurgled something to her, apparently a question.

"He looks like an old man, of course. What do you think He's supposed to look like?"

Colzest's noises of response almost sounded _offended_.

 _"Well I don't know! It's what I've always been taught."_

Tolmina gargled.

"What is she saying?" I asked.

"Um, I don't know. I guess they're saying we limit the idea of God too much by saying it's male or female? It doesn't have sex feelings...and the important thing is it still loves you very much?"

"Yeah," Lori said. "but by calling Him Father, you identify him as family. It's much more personal that way."

Gertie talked to Colzest for a moment.

"He...says it can still be personal, like how you love ET."

"I guess we kinda do that with stepfathers and stepmothers," I said. "Sometimes you don't call them mom or dad, but maybe `Joe' or whatever, you know, first name basis."

Lori crossed her arms. _"Except God doesn't have an official name, except maybe_ I Am. _"_

 _"Well..."_

Our theological discussion got cut short by Vorxora appearing in the middle of the ship.

I rushed out of my chair to hug him, but I discovered he was only a hologram.

ET smiled at me. _"Elliott!"_

"ET! We're coming to see you!...We didn't pass the test, but they're taking us to you anyway."

 _"Be good,"_ ET answered.

I swallowed. "We accidentally killed one of your friends. I hope you're not mad at us."

ET looked like he understood, but then growled something.

"Let me talk to him." Gertie explained the situation. "We didn't mean to kill him. It really was an accident." Charlie perched on her shoulder.

ET looked sad but gave her a nod, muttering something to her.

"He says it's okay. You didn't do the killing from hate."

Lori rushed up to meet him. "I hope you really wanted me to come along, because I'm here."

ET seemed unsurprised. _"He...loves... you."_

Lori suddenly looked uncomfortable. " _So you were playing matchmaker._ "

ET looked a little annoyed, but his response wasn't in English, so I wasn't sure what it meant.

"You didn't have to run away from home," I said.

Lori's face flushed red. I think I must have said the wrong thing.

A slender Qulpari with birthmarks resembling that of a Jack Russell terrier suddenly appeared next to ET, nuzzling its face into his neck, muttering something to him.

ET gave me an apologetic smile. _"I will see you on Jufuceri."_

He gargled something else to Gertie then vanished.

Lori stared. "He's got a girlfriend?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Dunno."

My stomach flip flopped at the jumble of emotions I felt. Jealousy, envy of what he had, sadness, but of course I also was happy for him, glad to see him again, excited about seeing his world. I know that might sound weird, but that's what I felt. _"Guess there's some things we don't know about him...You think that was just his sister?"_

Lori frowned. _"Elliott, I think all this_ playing pretend family _has gotten to you."_

 _`Pretend family.'_ That hurt, and it took me a moment to even understand why. "If...we're not brother and sister, _what_ are _we exactly?_ "

"Elliott, I never said I didn't love you, _even though your alien friend did arrange the whole thing._..I don't know, it just feels like I'm in a..." She stopped herself.

"In a what?" I asked.

Lori shook her head. _"Never mind. Can we talk about something else, please?"_

I really didn't want to let it go, but Gertie spoke before I could pry any deeper. "The other aliyum just told ET _it's his turn to warm the egg."_

"See?" Lori said. " _Not his sister._ "

"Why do you say that?" Gertie asked. "A boy at my school helps his mom bottle feed his baby brother."

Lori smirked. "I guess you _could_ have a point. We don't know much about their culture."

She swallowed, looked me in the eyes, like she expected me to say something.

Puzzled, I just responded with an expression that kinda said `What.'

Lori blushed and looked away quickly.

"Gertie," I said. "I heard ET saying something to you before he disappeared. What was it?"

She sighed. "Nothing. He just said he's sorry I don't have a boyfriend."

We really hadn't gotten a good sleep for several days.

When the aliens noticed us nodding off, Colzest directed us to some beds below deck. In a zero gravity situation like ours, it actually made sense to use beds with a Venus flytrap-like design. Once the bed closed, you were secure, not much of a chance of getting thrown into anything when the ship accelerated or hit something.

I dreamed I was the moon, and I kept drawing further and further away from the earth and the sun. The Earth's core had broken, and the planet started crying and crumbling to pieces.

The sun, similarly, grew cold and died. Mercury fell away.

I awoke from the dream with tears in my eyes.

I found the bed opening device and got out, taking my place in one of the moon chairs. Gertie had taken the snail thing with her to bed, probably would have slept with it in, had it not started nipping at her ear canal. I didn't want to wake her, so I just sat up with the aliens and tried to figure things out without a translator.

They had been listening to music, a holographic symphony playing in the center of the room.

One guy had a thing that resembled a Japanese koto, but you blew into it like a bagpipe, another you waved your hands around like a theramin. They had a didgeridoo thing you squeezed accordion-like on the sides, a shō with wiggling tentacles, and an octopus-like pipe organ thing. The leader made a moaning cat sound as he clapped sticks together.

It sounded terrible, at least from a human standpoint. Certain musical phrases got repeated too many times to be pleasant, the long 'rests' made you think they were done playing, and sometimes the notes got held too long or too short. I started wondering if someone were going to run their nails across a blackboard to add some variety.

"Is someone murdering a cat?" Lori asked when she joined me at the control pod.

"I think it's music."

Gertie came up to us, the snail thing held in one hand while she rubbed her eyes with the other. "Whatcha doing?"

 _"Watching the Martian philharmonic_ ," Lori joked.

My sister _must_ have been pretty tired, for she just accepted the statement at face value. "Oh."

She offered Lori the snail. "You wanna try using Mr. Q-Tip?"

Lori visibly shuddered. " _That's...okay_. _Give it to Elliott._ "

"Why? _You scared_? I _tried it and nothing happened to me..._ "

That didn't change her mind any.

Words like `breakfast,' `lunch' and `dinner' lose meaning when you don't have a clock or the sun. After enduring the aliens' dreadful symphony for what felt like an hour, all three of us humans decided we were hungry again... _for some meal_.

The aliens gave us _bean_ burritos. I thought, for a moment, they had given us actual meat, but no.

For a minute or so, we sat around the table arguing about it.

"It doesn't taste like a mushroom," Lori said. "It's definitely meat."

"What? Like _fish_ or something?"

"They never asked us anything about eating fish. Maybe that's okay with them."

"I don't know. I mean, you really think there's a fish that tastes like steak?"

"They _do_ have something called `tuna steak.'"

"That doesn't actually taste like steak, any more than a sea cow would taste like steak."

 _"Catfish tastes like chicken!"_ Gertie supplied unhelpfully.

Lori got so annoyed that she picked up the snail thing and stuck it in her ear, asking our hosts directly.

Me and Gertie stared at her, chuckling a little.

It turns out the Qulpari actually developed a chewy sort of _yeast and soy mixture_ that I couldn't really distinguish from real beef. I guess the consumption of living (or semi-living) microbes didn't offend their consciences that much.

I don't have much of anything exciting to tell you about the events of the next few hours. I'd compare it to a person taking a two day train ride through Russian tundra. _You're in a thing, full of strangers, you have very little to talk about, and the scenery doesn't change that much._

Like the aliens said, this wasn't a `fly by' of every planet in the solar system. Like Venus in the night sky on earth, the other planets were just little glowing dots in a sea of glowing stars. When the aliens said the tiny glowing things were planets, we had to take their word for it.

We watched a very long, dry sort of movie about Qulpari farmers. It was kind of like something an amateur director would come up with if they had no deadlines, a huge special effects budget and no concept of pacing or editing.

Our ship had a little dining area. Their table was made out of that pumpkin seed substance, and long enough for all of us to sit at. It appeared to be growing out of the floor. For chairs we had a few low mushroom-like things, also growing from the floor, but the table itself didn't stand that tall so we had to squat around it, Chinese style.

Again, the aliens' cooking was rather hit or miss. They tended to put refried beans and tofu in a lot of stuff. All sugar free.

For our breakfast meal, we had sort of... _pies_ , or _empanadas_ with beans and bits of fruit in them, or tofu and bits of fruit. Then we received bottles of that bitter organic juice stuff. After our `test', none of us complained.

Colzest and Tolmina gave us some language lessons, so we could tell the growling apart from the gargling. The parts of words that required glowing fingers, _that_ would be a little tricky.

They had some little handheld devices, kind of like phones, but with squishy sucker buttons, which they used to show us some holographic stuff about their planet, the animals, plants, and... _culture,_ I guess. We learned some about the language from this too.

Their planet had giant...pterodactyl things they trained to carry them around and move bushels of produce, winged crocodiles, dolphins with large dragonfly wings, dog-like things that, when lying down, looked exactly like an unmowed patch of grass, a bear-like thing resembling the prehistoric Megatherium, Parasaurolophus with eyestalks and a bunch of tentacles it used in water, and a hairy one eyed catfish...that actually ran around on land and acted like a dog.

So, that part was fun to learn stuff and so forth, but, you know, going back to my analogy about the train, it's like someone handing you a couple Russian books and a magazine on that very long trip. Your eyes glaze over after awhile and you end up just blankly staring at your weird fellow passengers again.

Colzest used to be a fire fighter for his tribe on Jufuceri. The _Neldabax_ , which translates roughly as `Lifeform Preservation Coalition' came by his village, telling him how they needed help with saving animals from destruction on "Some obscure little planet called earth." They didn't have to ask him twice. He just felt like it needed to be done, so he left his family to do it.

Rilquza was an orphan. His egg had been discovered by Qulpari on the planet Wuxrinus. The aliens incubated him, and he, getting a new chance at life, decided to repay them by volunteering for the Neldabax, eventually ascending the ranks of one of the head positions.

Tolmina, of course, having grown up on the moon, didn't have much of a history. She mentioned that she and the others might have some issues with their muscles and bones under Jufuceri's earth-like gravity.

The ship had some exercise equipment in the lower level. At first I questioned the waste of air, water and such, but the aliens told us that our muscles had probably atrophied somewhat from the moon and doing nothing on the ship.

The machines were odd looking all-in-one devices designed to work several muscle groups at once. Fortunately for us, there was a height adjustment thing on them, you know, because Rilquza wasn't a Qulpari, so we could actually use them...Well, except for the thing that worked out your prehensile tail muscles.

We flew through the asteroid belt, the one between Mars and Jupiter. Not quite as exciting as movies depict. Although there's rocks ranging from pebbles to the size of buildings, they were stretched pretty thin. That's how earth space probes and Qulpari ships could pass through it without being damaged too badly.

Roughly a day later, our pilot roused us out of sleep to show us Saturn. Pretty nice speed, if you think about it. _NASA probably would have taken at least a year_ _just to get to Mars_ , _and that's being optimistic_.

At the known end of our solar system, we got to see a few `planet-oids', then a nebula a few hours later. Mostly we saw a lot of nothing.

Lori chuckled. "You know, as bad as this is, I'd much rather watch _it_ than some of the crap they put on daytime TV. I'm _never_ going to miss _Arthur._ " Noting my puzzled look, she added, " _The movie about the rich drunk guy._ "

"Oh. Yeah, that and _Dallas._ "

Now, this whole time, me and Lori were still kind of... _working things out, though nonverbally,_ up until this point.

But now, since we had nothing much to look at but each other, I felt something had to be done to break that long silences. "You...still...have feelings for Jimmy, don't you? _You love him more than me._ "

" _Elliott_ ," she sighed. "Look. I _do_ love you, but you have to realize what we've both given up. There's only going to be you and me for, I don't know, _forever_? There's no choice anymore, neither one of us can exactly ' _play the field_ '."

Not understanding the conversation, Gertie protested, "Why is it going to be just you and him? _I want to be there too!_ "

Lori rolled her eyes. " _We're talking about girlfriend and boyfriend_ , Gertie."

She still looked worried. "You're... not _leaving me behind_?"

Me and Lori both laughed.

"Of course not!" Lori said. "We're just-"

My sister's eyes widened. " _You're trying to decide if you want to get married!_ "

Lori smacked herself in the face. "I... wasn't going to say it because..."

My mouth suddenly got dry as I waited for her next words.

Something completely different came out of her mouth. "I dunno, _it kinda feels like we're already married. T_ he moment we got in that ship and left earth, _maybe before then_ , even, I had to say goodbye to the idea of dating anyone else ever again, and what is a marriage but officially joining yourself to someone else's family? It makes me feel like I'm in an arranged marriage, _and ET set it up._ _I mean, I admit it's cool, going to space and seeing aliens and stuff, but..._ "

It kind of felt like I'd been slapped. "I'm sorry, I..."

" _Don't be!_ " Her face appeared to flush red. " _It's okay_ , I mean, _it's not, but it's not your fault._ "

In some ways, this was worse than a simple rejection, for now I was confused about how her level of interest. "What do you want me to do?"

She looked flustered. " _Nothing. forget it._ "

Out of respect for her feelings, I gave her some space, didn't try to push anything.

Instead of clearing the air between us, it kinda made things more awkward. After all, in a spaceship, you have nowhere to run away, it's like after a bad date with a co-worker in an office.

We resorted to retreating from each other mentally. As a side effect, I ended up studying the aliens' language and other stuff a lot more, and Lori had that snail thing in her ear more often, asking the aliens about their world, and how to turn a brown thumb into a green thumb, horticulturally speaking.

We didn't even talk at meal time, except with one exception:

The aliens had made us a flat bread with cheese, onions and tomatoes.

"Pizza!" Gertie exclaimed when she saw it.

 _"That's focaccia bread_ ," Lori corrected. "You can leave it out on a shelf without it spoiling because there's no meat."

After I'd taken a bite or two, I commented, "No sauce either."

Then me and Lori resumed our silence.

"Why aren't you talking?" Gertie asked. "Did you stop liking each other?"

" _Gertie._.." I scolded.

Lori, red faced, gave her a more diplomatic answer. " _It's complicated._ "

"I'm not going anywhere. _I have plenty of time, if you want to explain it to me_..."

Lori got redder. "Sorry, Gertie. _I don't really want to, okay?_ It's private."

My sister looked disappointed. "You think you'll talk later?"

Lori snorted in amusement. " _Maybe._ "

It was only around bedtime that me and Lori really figured out something to say to each other.

 _"Elliot..._ " she began. "I ...I _really do_ love you, and I _don't_ want to play this stupid silence game just because I'm afraid...I mean, _you're a special guy. And all this alien stuff...a girl would envy me in this situation._ So if you really want to marry-"

My face suddenly got hot. "I .. . I don't want to force you into anything. _We_ can _just be pretend brother and sister_. _We're only kids,_ you know?"

Lori responded by giving me a peck on the lips. I'd say it was a 'chaste' kiss, but she didn't aim for my forehead or cheek, which only added to my confusion about our relationship. "Thank you."

"Daddy said I shouldn't try to have babies until I'm twenty one," Gertie said.

Lori laughed. " _My mom_ said not to have any until you got a job or a man to support you, _preferably both._ " She stared at me in worriment. "Everything we've been taught up to this point...It's all going to be useless, isn't it? I mean, if we're really never going back, _all that stuff about careers we learned in school, science, economics_... _it's all junk._ We're going to be like _dropouts_ from, from, _Starfleet Jedi school!_ I mean, _what are we going to do for a living?_ I don't know how to fix a _starship engine_ or a _robot_ , _or even make pancakes!_ (Line omitted-we felt a little better about things after that.)

I rolled my eyes. " _C'mon._ I know we're not doing _that!_ "

Lori didn't look so sure. "You can't seriously expect them to wait on us hand and foot for the rest of our lives, do you? We'd have to do _something_ to earn our keep! _These guys are mostly bald! I can't even do hair!_ "

"I bet we could make Rilquza look pretty," Gertie suggested, but it didn't seem to improve Lori's mood.

"I'm sure _ET_ will be able to figure something out," I said.

She still wasn't convinced. "Oh God. We're not gonna just... _farm forever_ , are we?"

My facial expression told her before my mouth did.

 _"Gee, slave labor_ and _an arranged marriage!_ I'm starting to wonder if I were better off being whisked away to a government facility!"

"Lori, I-"

She rubbed her face in frustration. _"I know. It's not your fault."_

"Lori, we don't even know that much about their economy. There could be _plenty_ of interesting jobs to do. We just don't know about them."

 _"I hope you're right."_

Although the conversation did nothing to make her any happier, she _did_ start taking to me again. _Like a sister._

Unlike many human beings, the aliens cared little for entertainment. Despite having a _sport_ , _music_ and _movies_ , _they actually preferred to sit together and talk about things for hours._ We humans found this boring and very frustrating, but also somewhat... _healing_ , in terms of our emotional well being.

They learned a lot more about us than we learned about them. They seemed fascinated by how family members could drink beer and sit in front of a TV and ignore people for most of the day. Even more fascinating: How we tended to think a person had no value if they weren't some kind of celebrity, _or didn't look like a celebrity_.

Since celebrities _did_ mean so much to people, my little ` _family_ ' spent a lot of time explaining the importance of all kinds of things, like _The Monkees_ , recordings of the 1985 World Series, _Entertainment Tonight_ with John Tesh, _Space Hunter: Adventures in the Forbidden Zone_ , a bunch of westerns, and _The Bozo Show_.

With the exception of a few comets and another nebula, it seemed like forever before we actually saw anything interesting out the windows. In fact, with the strange vantage point, we couldn't even tell Ursa Major from Corona Borealis, _or where those stars_ were _exactly_. We tried to ask the crew, but Qulpari have their own names for constellations, and they drew completely different patterns. I couldn't imagine what their horoscopes were like.

We came across a purple planet with yellow spots and a ring. From what the aliens told me, it was cold there, like the Planet Pluto.

It seemed we were getting close to our destination. Lori nervously clenched my hand.

ET's planets didn't align in a straight line either. The next thing that appeared at the window, hours later, was Jufuceri itself.

Big, green, swirling purple-green, two moons, one larger than the other. Little glowing things that looked like jellyfish floated in and out of the planet's atmosphere, orbited the planet.

 _Welcome home,_ ET's voice said in my mind.


	20. Chapter 20: The Green Planet

The floating Man-O-War looking things apparently served as space satellites. As we neared the planet, a pair of them floated outside our window, bathing the ship in red light.

Rilquza placed his hand on a panel, and our ship responded with five notes: _Re, Mi, Do, Do, So..._

The floating thing responded with the same notes, but it sounded like a bassoon.

A group of jellyfish things swarmed around our vehicle, escorting us down through the planet's atmosphere.

The clouds piled in thick, unusual shapes, making my imagination go crazy with possibilities. The clouds passed, and the view got even stranger.

I saw nothing but jungle, stretching all the way to the horizon. No sign of buildings, parking lots or roads, just the canopies of trees, and the long winding ribbons of massive green rivers.

As the canopies gained definition, I began to notice subtle indications of civilization. Poking out, here and there, were huge marble-like spheroids, twisting multicolored spires and domed buildings set high among the treetops.

Our craft got joined by dozens of others in different shapes, sizes and colors.

"Look! Look!" Gertie cried, pointing to one of them. "It's ET's ship!"

" _Maybe...but I think he's home warming an egg right now."_

"I hope we get to see him soon. I'm _so tired_ of waiting!"

Our pilots steered us toward a massive glittering structure shaped like a lotus on a lily pad. The overall design reminded me of pictures I'd seen of the Sydney Opera House, curving shells, big glass windows.

The place served as a garage of sorts. We flew in through a tunnel, landing on a shelf in a big vending machine thing everyone else was using to park their vehicles.

A cube of something resembling watermelon Jell-O surrounded our vehicle. Our pilots informed us that it had something to do with decontamination.

Tolmina shut off the engine, leading us to the exit hatch. I asked if we should bring our things along, but Colzest said they'd have their people bring the items to once once decontamination was complete.

The hatch came open, leaving us staring at a wall of jiggling pink gelatin. Beyond, I could see vague shapes, the walls of our compartment, Qulpari moving around, gawking and pointing to us, lots of machinery, and the other vending machine things that held other spaceships.

"Can we eat that pink stuff?" Gertie asked, but the aliens said no, definitely not.

I was kind of afraid of suffocating, and went to get the oxygen equipment, but Rilquza stopped me. It turns out their ship had a _creature_ , attached on a long snake-like body, that you put on your face, and that helped you breathe in these kinds of situations. Goggles kept the stuff out of your eyes. They put Charlie in a special `pet carrier'.

Rilquza and Tolmina went first. I could just barely see them through the ooze, speaking to someone on the other side.

The masks snaked back to us, enclosed in protective bubbles. Colzest urged me and Lori to put them on.

Rilquza's goggles were an odd fit, but they suckered around our eyes well enough to protect us from...whatever it was.

Lori got nervous, letting Gertie go ahead. She acted like she were looking out for my sister, being the young one and all, but I think she was just scared.

I and Gertie clutched each other's hands as we stumbled into the oozing blob. It felt like swimming through gel hand sanitizer. The creature's tubes, stuck into my nose and mouth, pumped me with air smelling of burnt popcorn and old bagels. My eyes stung in places where the gel seeped in, but the effect was like opening your eyes in a chlorinated swimming pool, not a big deal. Actual hand sanitizer would have been worse.

From outside, Rilquza and Tolmina guided us to a couple odd looking panels at the border of the cube.

The moment I stepped outside on one and landed, a blast of hot air and something powdery shot out from a grating below my feet, and I became encapsulated in a large rubbery bubble, resistant to puncture.

While this was happening, the Qulpari had used their powers to separate my hand from my sister's. She ended up floating in an unconnected bubble next to mine, looking very unhappy, attempting to pop the bubble with her fingernails.

The masks and goggles traveled back into the ship.

The place I floated in reminded me of a shopping mall, with all its balconies, landings, and decorative plant boxes. The walls were covered in colorful hexagonal times, and large non-English banners hung from the rafters.

Colzest somehow coaxed Lori out.

The aliens telepathically moved Gertie aside like a balloon, directing Lori to my sister's spot. She too got blasted with powder and... _ballooned_. Unfamiliar looking aliens pointed and stared at our bubbles, muttering to each other, going "Oooohhh!"

"What are they doing to us!" Lori cried.

Since I was the one with the Jandaga in my ear at the time, I posed the question.

 _It's standard procedure. The Eklemese need to know if you have any contaminants not eliminated by the Gorbild Cube._

"We're not sick," I said.

 _It doesn't matter. Any time we bring an animal here, it has to be placed in quarantine until it's cleared with Eklemese._

"But I'm not an animal.I'm a person."

An official looking Qulpari had been standing nearby, clad in a silver and turquoise `bone' breastplate. Tolmina relayed the question to him, but got a short dismissive growl in reply.

 _He says that every animal feels like they're special, but we can't afford to get anyone sick._

"They _are_ going to bring us our stuff, aren't they?"

Lori stared at me in horror. _"Are they going to lock us away in a zoo?"_

I asked, but nobody could answer the question. The guy with the breastplate just said to place us in something called a Todronab and take us to the Woxewan, whatever that was.

A group of Qulpari donned masks and entered the ship, emerging with sealed containers, presumably containing our stuff.

We got floated down a ramp, amidst hundreds of staring aliens, mostly Qulpari, but a good number of Abreyas too. An iris gate opened, and we found ourselves outside, getting a good look at ET's world for the first time.

The sky was a brilliant green, not too surprising since the rivers looked green when we first came in. On earth, when we had left, it had been late fall, but this side of ET's planet happened to be in the middle of summer. Not the best season for our particular outfits. I could feel the heat through the bubble.

All around us, we saw trees, big and little in a wide assortment of colors. You couldn't see leaves on some of them, they just looked like trunks, boughs and branches supporting huge clusters of pink and purple cotton balls, fuzzy orbs ranging from the size of a basketball to the diameter of a boulder. Others had tube shaped leaves resembling sea anemone, and when you passed them, their brilliant flowers shot back inside the tubes.

I saw a lot of abstract sculptures, and sculptures of Qulpari with plaques that I couldn't read. What I didn't see were advertisements, or books or newspapers. Here and there, I caught a Qulpari at rest, running their hands over a long beaded textile, or something resembling a gold tailor's tape measure, kind of like Native Americans used to read wampum.

The lily pad thing supporting the `garage' and the surrounding platform was huge, crafted from some type of super light concrete, covered with all these hexagonal paving stones.

We arrived at a dock, and a metal construct that looked like part of a roller coaster track.

When I glanced over the edge, I could see how far off the ground we were. Trees the size of skyscrapers, bedecked with futuristic mushroom shaped buildings, extended down for more than fifty feet on every side. I sucked in my breath.

I heard the sound of a heavy wind, like what you'd hear before a storm. Our bubbles shook violently and drifted, making me afraid we'd blow off the edge. Somehow, though, in between us captives _willing_ the bubbles not to move, and the aliens' power, we didn't fly away, and we saw the source of the disturbance zooming up the metal tracks.

It resembled a train, but it was alive, a giant hairy caterpillar creature with a segmented body and a big head that combined features of a house fly with a house cat. It came to as top with a loud pneumatic hiss, and door panels swung outward and up on its furry sides like a Delorean.

Our alien friends floated us inside this thing, designed like a subway car, weirdly upholstered in fur all around, with porthole windows, obviously no signs or bolted in fixtures. The seats, ramps and standing poles appeared to be part of the thing's body. I imagined if you drove a nail into any part of it, the creature would shriek and derail itself.

Carrying contaminated livestock appeared to be a common practice in that place, for we soon found our bubbles being placed in a set of egg-carton-like depressions in between the benches.

Although we had the comforting presence of Rilquza, Tolmina and Colzest in adjacent seats, it didn't change the fact that everyone in the entire vehicle was staring at us.

"I feel like a monkey at a zoo," Gertie complained.

Lori slumped in her bubble. "Not a lot we can do about it now...At least they let us keep our clothes. Every time you read a story about someone being abducted, they generally get stripped naked and probed."

"You think they'll give me clothes like Rilquza has?" Gertie asked.

"I...don't know."

The swing doors closed, and we were moving. The view out the windows skewed as our otherworldly living vehicle dropped at a steep, dangerous angle.

"Is this thing safe?" Lori asked, obviously directing the question to the aliens.

I repeated the inquiry.

 _You have nothing to worry about. Qulpari use this Todronab every day._

Lori frowned at me. "So where do you think they're taking us?"

I shook my head. "I don't know, _Tatooine?_ "

"They said we were going to the _Woxewan_ ," Gertie pointed out.

"Yeah? And what is that, exactly? _A prison? A dairy farm?_ The place where they train Stormtroopers?"

"Dunno," I admitted.

I tried to ask, but our three alien friends got busy talking to other aliens about a lot of complicated stuff I couldn't understand, and they acted like they couldn't hear me when I spoke to them.

Lori groaned. "I was picturing something different when I volunteered to come along on this crazy adventure."

My face flushed hot. "So now you _volunteered?_ I thought ET was _`playing matchmaker and arranging a marriage for us!'"_

Lori sighed in frustration. _"Why do I even talk to you?"_

"Don't get upset at him," Gertie blurted. "You're the first girlfriend he's ever had. He doesn't know how to talk to them. I know because I'm his sister."

Lori laughed, her angry expression softening a little as she looked at me. _"That true?"_

I swallowed. _"Maybe?"_

 _"You should say yes, Elliott,"_ Gertie urged.

Lori grinned expectantly.

I rolled my eyes. "Okay, okay! It's true. Every word of it."

We had only settled in the vehicle a moment before the swing doors came back open again, and everyone came filing out again.

Our alien friends floated us out on another vast platform. Before us stood a huge swirling purple-orange orb flanked by colorful onion domes and spires that made you think of ice cream.

A pair of impossibly large trees supported the main structure _and_ its associated maze of little domed buildings.

While the other aliens took a ramp down into the dome area, us humans got levitated out on an enclosed moving sidewalk above it, watching the crowds beneath doing strange business transactions with `wampum' and bracelets of different kinds of glowing beads.

Moments later, we arrived at a silver gate, guarded by a pair of Qulpari in official looking breastplates.

To either side of this gate lay a set of dark, forbidding looking cylindrical chutes, reminding me of what construction crews used to get rid of trash on tall building scaffolding. I couldn't see where it ended, only where it began.

Without a word, one of the breastplated guards flung me down a chute.

I fell screaming into the dark.

I tumbled for what felt like a mile, then the dark pipe bent at a slight angle like a water slide, and I went shooting down another tube.

The tube ended abruptly, and I went flying through the air, into a big rubbery wall.

My balloon bounced off, splashing down into a pool of water, and there I sat for over a minute.

Something made a mechanical humming sound. Part of the wall lowered into the water, and currents dragged me forward. I could only watch helplessly as my bubble rolled down a channel, through something like a darkened gondola tunnel.

Without warning, my bubble disappeared, and I found myself dropping into a pool of ice cold water.

It looked like an underground reservoir. The chamber was one big gray cube, no decoration, and only one visible door.

Although crystal clear and everything, my teeth were chattering, so I quickly swamp to a ramp I saw in front of me, climbed up on a raised concrete island that made hollow sounds when I walked on it.

A moving sidewalk came on when I approached. Since I had nowhere else to go, I got on, letting it take me through a tunnel.

The conveyor ended in a semicircular room lined with doors. I heard all kinds of weird animal noises, but couldn't tell what door any of it was coming from. I didn't know what was going on, but I knew I didn't want to be near whatever was making all that noise. I froze in one spot, and didn't move for a long time.

I heard a musical tone. A light appeared above one of the doors.

It slid open, revealing a prison-like gray room.

"ET!" I yelled. "Vorxora!"

No answer.

"Rilquza! Tolmina! Anyone! Help?"

A cluster of glowing arrows appeared around the open door.

I whimpered. For the first time since we left the moon, I had real doubts about the kindness of ET's people.

It felt like I'd only traded one governmental prison cell for another.

Lori and Gertie weren't present, so I just let my tears fall, despondently shuffling into the cell.


	21. Chapter 21: The Cage

I suppose my prison could have been worse.

A floating copper eye followed me around, the aliens' camera system, I figured.

The cell was the size of your average two bed motel room. I had the basics, a bed (Venus flytrap thing, obviously), pitcher plant toilet, shower (unfortunately, not much privacy), a compartment that held water bottles (they looked like enlarged versions of the things you put on hamster cages), and a shelf, attached to a sort of dog door, presumably for food, but I also had a few extras.

They'd provided me with an exercise machine, I had a `play area' cluttered with something I presumed to be toys, and one of their handheld computers. A holographic thing at the foot of the bed showed 2D earth broadcasts the aliens had recorded.

They'd given me a couple ` _companions_ ,' too. A table next to the bed held a pot of impressive African violets, and they had an animal in a bubble suspended in one of those giant `egg cups.'

A circular panel on the wall indicated how they'd gotten the creature in there, and how it probably hadn't been there long enough to need food or water or anything.

It was one of those four legged `catfish' things. Size of a Labrador retriever, hairy, cyclops eyed, tusks like a boar. As I approached the bubble, the creature growled and wiggled.

Without warning, the bubble popped, and the catfish thing pounced on me, knocking me to the concrete.

A mouthful of lion's teeth opened, dripping saliva on my face. I thought for sure it intended to kill and eat me.

It sniffed, poked me with an anglerfish-like appendage growing from its forehead, then licked me like crazy.

I laughed, pushed the thing away. "Hey! Stop!"

I got to my feet.

The creature oinked and barked at me, rolled over on its belly, flapping its scaly fish tail.

As I knelt down to pet it, I noticed a weirder creature strutting past my only window.

The thing had the lower body of a goose, like `Mr. Featherpants' but big as a good sized Shetland pony. An obsidian colored humanoid body connected to it, topped by a cyclops pig's head. The thing had a little computer, pushing buttons as it observed me and talked to the Qulpari in its booth.

I tried to listen in, but at that moment the creature in my ear got too hungry, and when I took it out, my new furry friend shot out his tongue, frog-like, swallowing the Jandaga in one gulp.

"Oh gee thanks!" I cried. "Now how am I supposed to know what anyone is saying?"

The catfish thing just made a quizzical dog noise and panted.

Now even more depressed, I sat down on the bed, watched _Punky Brewster_ for a minute.

Still shivering from my swim, I looked around for towels, but found none. I discovered a blow drying machine completely by accident while looking around the shower.

I felt a little better after drying off, but I didn't have much control over the recordings, which depressed me again. When the cartoon ended, the aliens had decided to show me that boring exercise show they put on in the early mornings, bikini ladies making afterimages as they do jumping jacks in a pink room. I tinkered with the little computer, ignoring the program.

A low growl and a lapping tongue awakened me from slumber. I guess the events of the last few hours had taken their toll, and my new pet had joined me in bed.

When I sat up, I noticed that someone had slid a tray of those empanada things into the cell, and... _kibble_ for the catfish creature.

I spent the whole day in captivity, watching _The Dick Tracy Show_ , _Ferris Bueller_ , _The Great Space Coaster._..My attention waned when they showed Adam West in his gray tights, and some black and white cowboy shows. The monotonous imprisonment in front of the TV reminded me a lot of daycare places I went to when I was little.

I played with the `toys' the aliens had set out, complicated Rubik's cube type puzzle things where you had to push buttons in and turn knobs in addition to aligning the faces. They had a molecular model, and a Qulpari doll with a tool that allowed you to get an X-ray of its anatomy like a Visible Man kit.

An alien came in through the entry door, clad in a rubbery blue suit and helmet. It checked my pet, the plant, then examined me.

He asked me a bunch of stuff, but I could only understand parts. I knew how to say "I don't understand you," but not "Your monster just ate my translator." My visitor growled something else, waddling out.

More hours passed. I searched the place for possible ways out, crevices or cracks I could exploit somehow, maybe dig a tunnel through. No such luck. I even tried to exploit weaknesses in the computer device, but only found some games and a program that allowed me to make video `phone calls' to aliens. That last part would have been great, except I didn't know Rilquza or Vorxora's `number.'

I gave up hope, staring sadly at a wall. My pet kept licking me to make me cheer up, but it didn't help.

When I heard tapping on my window, i didn't even care to look. It wasn't until the knocking got more urgent that I bothered turning my head.

When I noticed who it was, I sat up with a start. "Colzest!"

Okay, not my favorite alien to see, but he was familiar, and I could only hope that he could help me in some way. I rushed to the glass, waving to him.

He'd been suited in one of those rubbery outfits like the guy who had visited my cell. I scarcely recognized him because he wore a space helmet, but during our trip I'd stared at his weathered face long enough to tell him from the others of his kind.

Colzest smiled, raised a glowing finger.

I pressed my hand to the pane. "What's going on! Why am I here? Please help me!"

The alien rolled his eyes, pointed to the side of his head, nonverbally asking where my ear slug was.

I shook my head, pantomimed eating it, gestured to the catfish thing.

Colzest rubbed his eyes and forehead like he we're having a headache, making a low shuddering sound.

He pantomimed 'I talk talk point point,' which only confused me.

"You've... been talking with them about freeing me."

Colzest scratched his head, pantomimed 'You, short you, wavy you, point point talk talk.'

Out of frustration, I picked up the computer, poking buttons until I pulled up a language module that I'd become a little familiar with. It wasn't perfect, but I could manage a few alien sounds. The device _did_ ask me to talk to it.

In Qulpari, I said, "Me, outside, yes?"

Colzest groaned, rattling off a bunch of stuff.

" _No?_ " I asked. _"No outside?"_

Colzest mimed a sandwich, then a house.

"A restaurant."

The goose thing appeared at the window, pushed a button, and my cell door came open.

`Sandwich house' Colzest pantomimed again.

My cell had moved. I sort of noticed the difference a couple times when the other Qulpari came in to his check up, but now, on the other side of the door, I could see that it wasn't the same place I'd arrived in. The aliens had somehow moved my entire room without any noise or shaking. I stood in a rotunda, staring at rows of closed cell doors.

A chime rang and one slid open, revealing a long gray tunnel.

Deciding anything was better than my current cell, I hurried to the end.

I found myself in a big domed greenhouse, like something out of the movie _Silent Running_.

"Elliot!" Gertie cried, rushing up to give me a hug. Lori came up and hugged me too.

She pressed her forehead to mine. "So. You've got the translator. What did you find out?"

I sighed. "I _had_ the translator. _An animal just ate it."_

Lori gawked at me. _"An animal? Ate your slug?"_

Hearing an oink, I glanced back and saw the creature had followed me. I frowned. "Yeah. _Him._ "

The catfish creature mooed happily.

 _"How are we supposed to talk to them now!"_ Lori cried.

 _"Like anyone learns any language, I guess. Immersion."_

"Does he bite?" my sister asked.

"I...don't think so."

Gertie smiled, petting the creature on the head. "Did you name him yet?"

"No. I was kind of mad about him eating my ear slug."

My sister didn't hold any grudges. " _Let's call him Chewy._ "

"He doesn't look like a Wookiee," Lori remarked.

 _"Yeah,"_ I groaned. " _But he_ did _eat our translator._ "

I'd compare this `bio-sphere' to the `natural' exhibits they have at zoos. It gave you the impression of freedom, but you couldn't go where you wanted.

All around us they had a simulated jungle of earth plants. We had a shed containing gardening equipment and toys, a `bird bath' that consistently circulated cool water (a drinking fountain, I supposed), sink, toilet, and a small waterfall hissed at one side area.

A little `house' stood in the center of this place, a prefab concrete structure shaped like a dome tent, big enough to fit four adults. It had no beds, but the floor had such a fat cushion to it that you really didn't need much more than a blanket.

It turned out that each one of us had been given a pet. Lori's was a feathery bird with a pink rat's tail and the head and neck of a frilled lizard, dubbed `Wingy MacSaurus' and Gertie...she had the weirdest one: A cockroach the size of a small dog, one with the head of a budgie, and a raccoon's tail and limbs (she named that one `Harry Bugbird').

"They gave us _plants_ ," Lori complained. "Now they're giving us _more_ to take care of."

"I don't know if that's what they're doing," I said. "Maybe it's like putting a canary in a coal mine. They're trying to figure out if we're toxic to their species."

"That's kind of a double standard, isn't it? You can't eat a hamburger, but they do animal testing?"

"Maybe ET or Rilquza convinced them we're not dangerous."

She frowned. _"...Maybe..."_

Lori stared through the dome at a gray corridor where Qulpari pointed at us and muttered to each other. "I was right. This is ending like that _Twilight Zone_ episode."

"You don't know that," I said.

"Are you saying this place doesn't look like a zoo to you?"

I had nothing to say to that.

We spent a week in that place, just us and our alien pets. Three times a day, a round table would rise out of the ground in front of our little house, laden with food. The cooking never improved, but we didn't starve either. What could you do?

The aliens sent us other stuff along with the food, _and_ our pet food. Since I couldn't go back to my cell (and didn't want to) they shipped over the computer, the African violet, the toys, and then, later, Gertie's tape deck and our 'pet plants.'

A hologram projector inside the house played recordings from earth 24-7, but we didn't have a remote or anything to control what they were showing. One day they played an endless string of commercials and, about ten times in a twelve hour period, the video to _Obsession_ by Animotion. It was okay during our waking hours, when we could walk off and do other stuff, _but when we wanted to sleep..._

Eventually we got so fed up that we used a spade to pry it off the wall, sticking it in the back of the tool shed.

Only then, by accident, did we discover the shut-off button.

Between the three of us humans, we figured out how to fully operate the Qulpari language module and master the basics, 'hungry,' 'thirsty' 'where's the haxgep (toilet)' and to call every Qulpari 'bilo' to be respectful. The module helped us understand the 'video phone' feature a little, but, as Lori remarked, it was like a "Roulette of chat". I tried to find Vorxora, but the interface wasn't very intuitive, at least to a human user.

"Can't you snap up a chat with anyone you know?" Lori complained as I fumbled through a conversation with a stranger. "I'd kill for even a couple minutes face time with the guys we came in with... _Even that grumpy Colgate!"_

 _"Colzest,"_ I corrected.

She rolled her eyes. "They named him after soap and toothpaste. It's no wonder he's so mean."

 _"You don't want to know what Sikes means in our language,"_ I joked.

That got me a blank look.

"You've never seen _Alien Nation_?"

 _"I'm_ in _an alien nation."_

 _"It's a movie._ Anyway, my point is that the syllables of their names might mean something different in Qulpari. A name like Polly Wannacracker might be a perfectly respectable family name, and Lori could be a cuss word."

She frowned. "Oh."

One of our 'snap a chat' friends _really tried_ to communicate with us. A Qulpari, named Niztogi, had freckles, and the same Jack Russell terrier birthmarks I'd seen on ET's female friend. I asked about ET but I didn't think he understood.

What he _did_ understand was how we could use some language lessons, so he would take his device around... _wherever he was_ (a house in a jungle, it seemed like), and show us things, asking us to respond, or repeat what he was saying. It helped.

After that, we spoke to him at least once every day.

Time passed.

At the end of the week, as we were tending our pet plants, considering taking them out of their pots and planting them in the little jungle, I noticed a Qulpari slowly padding its way into our enclosure. At first, I thought I was hallucinating, but when I rubbed my eyes, blurry with tears, it didn't go away.

He was actually there. _And not even wearing a protective suit._

 _"ET?"_

The alien's expression reflected pity, the kind of face a grandmother makes when your parents are fighting and you run to her house. With a sigh, and his heart glowing through his skin, ET spread his slimy brown arms, inviting a hug.


	22. Chapter 22: Reunion

I know, I'm a big sissy, but I was really crying now.

I rushed into the alien's arms, holding him close. "ET! I've missed you so much! We've gone through _so much_ to get here!" I tried to tell him about everything that happened, but honestly it didn't make a lot of sense because I was talking too fast and sobbing.

ET gave me that same look he'd given me when I'd first taken him to my house and attempted to explain everything about my planet. The expression was hard to read, I wasn't sure if he actually understood, or if it had been productive as speaking to a dog.

ET patted me on the back. " _Merry Christmas._ "

I frowned at him. " _What?"_ And then I panicked. " _Are you saying it's been that long?_ I thought we were only gone a few _days!_ It wasn't even Thanksgiving!"

ET flinched, his eyes blinking rapidly. " _Mudo!"_ He flashed the Vulcan sign. " _I come in_.. _.peace-man_."

 _"ET?_ " Gertie cried.

My alien friend tipped an imaginary hat to my sister. " _Howdy, ma'am._ "

Gertie rushed up and hugged him. She was crying too, and just as awkward with words.

" _Merry... Christmas?_ " ET seemed hesitant saying it now.

 _"It wasn't even Thanksgiving!"_ Gertie whimpered.

 _"Mudo mudo mudo!"_ ET swallowed, rubbing her back. " _Happy... birthday?_ "

My sister and I exchanged confused glances. Neither one of us had a birthday coming in several months.

 _"I... study... your... language,_ " ET said. _"Do...I... speak... good?"_

I chuckled, shaking my head. "It needs work. _Ocjalra tasjamab oxawabom._ " The phrase meant `Hello, it's really good to see you, dear old friend from another planet.' I'd picked up that one from the modules. I felt pretty confident about saying it, the inflection and everything.

ET's eyes widened. He got this confused dog look.

 _"Jalra_?" I attempted again, putting stress on the syllables. " _Tasmjamaab oxawa bomm_?"

ET grinned, mirrored my head shaking. "Your...Wumpaza...needs...work."

"I can't believe it," Lori said. " _He's actually here._ "

ET pointed a glowing finger at her. " _Here's looking at Euclid._ "

"Great," she groaned. "He knows just as much about English as his friends. _I thought he went to earth!_ "

 _"Robble robble?_ " ET asked.

I gave Lori an apologetic look. " _We're not so hot in his language either_."

ET waved her closer. " _Excuse-me-Lieutenant-Columbo_."

Lori stared. "Is he always this weird?"

"I don't care." My sister was practically asleep on ET's shoulder. "I'm just glad to see him again."

"I love you," ET said, though I wasn't sure if he meant it or if he were quoting a soap opera.

Lori, not having the same kind of relationship with the alien, didn't touch him. " _So he's finally here_...Is he going to let us out?"

Although now uncertain of my language skills, I tried a basic Wumpaza version of "us outside now".

ET slowly nodded his head. "Fol-low."

We tailed him into the outside corridor, through an open door indicated by a light.

"Well," I said. "Even if we end up in another prison, it'll be a prison with ET."

We entered a little capsule shaped room with a padded bench running around it, control devices on the walls. Following ET's cue, we sat down.

The door closed, something hissed, I felt my insides shifting, and then the door came open again.

"It's like that tube thing at the bank!" Lori remarked.

ET waddled out. "Fol-low."

We found ourselves standing on an observation platform amidst the trees. We appeared to have come out of a large cylindrical building in the center. Domed `biospheres' lay all around us, monitors displaying different animals in their habitats, rabbits, deer, elephants, tiger cubs, stuff like that. I would have felt a little upset when I spotted our prison among these, but we had a _welcoming reception._

Charlie flew down from a monitoring station, giving each of us a nuzzle. Rilquza, Tolmina and Colzest, who had been idly reading wampum beads in our absence, got up from the benches they sat upon, greeting us with their glowing fingers. And then there was...ET's... _female friend_ with the Jack Russell patterning.

The female had brought along her slimy purple egg, and a ridiculously thick pillow to rest it on. It seemed she had been warming it with her body, but now stood up to greet us.

Shockingly, we also found ourselves in the company of Meazquad, that stranger who had 'face chatted' with us and taught us the language. He pointed a glowing finger at me, speaking in English. _"Person!"_

I laughed. "Yeah! You got it right!"

Meazquad put his hands to his sides, indicating my faux pas.

I slowly complimented him on his English, in his own tongue. He and ET looked at each other and chuckled.

"Wait," Lori said. " _Those two are friends?_ "

Our teacher pointed to ET, then himself. " _Brother, sister._ "

Baffled by the statement, I frowned, pointed to him. "Boy? _Muecowa_?"

Meazquad Nodded.

I pointed to ET. "Girl? _Vurnird_?"

Meazquad shook his head . _"Muecowa!_ "

I pointed to him, then ET. "You. _Brother!_ No sister! Sister girl! Girl _Vurnird!_ " I pointed to Lori and Gertie. " _Girl._ "

Not getting my explanation, he pointed to me. "You make baby?"

I scratched my head. "Um, _I can._.."

Meazquad pointed to the girls. "What they do?"

I pointed to my stomach. "Baby. Here."

Meazquad grinned, nodding his head vigorously. "It is the same." He pointed to ET's female, then ET. "Pabyeba make baby. Vorxora lay egg. When you lay egg?"

Lori burst out laughing. " _Not for a long time! We haven't tried that hard!_ "

Meazquad blinked rapidly, not getting the joke, but my face was hot with embarrassment.

"Elliot," Lori said. " _I think your friend is a she._ "

The Qulpari (doctor?) who had come into my cell to examine me earlier, for some reason, joined us, and this time without the blue suit. He waddled up to ET, rattling off a bunch of stuff as he handed ( _him?_ ) a thing resembling a bento box.

I saw that the compartments held some of those slug creatures.

"Don't give these to Gugorma!" Meazquad joked in Wumpaza. " _Bad_!"

"I won't," I promised, putting one in my ear.

I was about to ask Meazquad to clarify his comments about ET's sex and what time of year it was, but before I could say a word, I noticed the Canada goose thing marching up to us.

The presence of the creature itself wasn't that surprising. What _did_ surprise me was its companion.

 _An adult human being._

Lanky, Caucasian, crazy unkempt curly blonde hair , wild eyes, clad in a multi colored, weird looking jumpsuit.

"Wow! _Kids!_ "

The man rushed up to us three humans, shaking our hands. "Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm Roy Neary. _Did they pick you up at Devil's Tower too?"_


	23. Chapter 23: Close Encounters

I stared at the stranger, mouth hanging open in shock.

"Devil's tower in Wyoming?" he prompted. " _Big... mothership...no?"_

We just gawked at him like he were a new exotic type of alien.

Lori frowned. " _You're saying they abducted you?_ "

Roy shook his head. _"I sought them out._ Did they abduct _you?"_

" _Not at first._ "

"It's complicated," I said.

The man chuckled. " _I missed banter like this._ "

I saw desperate loneliness in the man's eyes, the kind of hungry facial expression Robinson Crusoe got on that one old movie I watched. Honestly, I found it a little scary.

"So how _did_ you get here?" Lori asked. " _I'm dying to know._ "

Roy took a deep breath. " _Long story._ I'd love to hear yours too, but I bet you kids would like to get out of here, right?"

Lori smirked. "So, what, _we're going back to your condo to have a barbecue?_ "

Roy let out a laughing snort. " _Oh man, you guys..._ " He gestured back the way he'd come. "C'mon. I'll show you around."

"Wait, I said. "What about ET?"

Roy looked puzzled. "ET?"

I pointed. " _Vorxora._ "

Roy spoke to the alien in Wumpaza for a minute, then the two looked at me. "We kinda live in two separate parts of town," the man said. "Your friend thinks you'd be better off staying with someone of your own kind."

Noting how I and Gertie suddenly looked depressed, Roy added, "C'mon, _you can still see her!_ We just think you might want to stay with _someone more like you._ "

We kids looked at each other.

"What do you think?"

"I think we need a dose of normal." Lori paused to stare at the man. _"Or...something...close to it."_

Gertie pouted. _"But we came all this way to see ET! We can't just leave him again!"_

"No one's leaving anyone, sweetie," Roy said. "We can fly you over to see her anytime you want."

 _"That's what Mom said about Daddy before the divorce._ "

 _"Oh Jeez."_ Roy sighed and rubbed his face. _"I'm sorry...Where are your folks now?"_

 _"...Complicated,"_ she said. "Where's _your_ family?"

"Kid, we've got a _lot_ to talk about. I just want to get your _housing situation_ figured out right now..."

He talked with ET for a few more minutes, their expressions and gestures rather flustered, possibly a bit aggravated.

The `doctor' and the goose thing waddled away, I guess to continue scientific business downstairs.

At last Roy said, " _Okay._ Here's what we're going to do. We'll take you on a grand tour, and I'll stay with... _ET_ for the time being, and _I'm kind of by myself right now_ , so, I'll, _sleep on the floor or something_ until we get things figured out."

"Yay!" Gertie said.

I could see the man rolling his eyes.

"The look on Lori's face seemed to say `You see what I'm dealing with?' "So now that _that's_ settled... _when can we leave?_ "

Roy and Lori started walking away. ET muttered something to his, um, _mate_. Since I had my translator in my ear, I asked if she were coming along. The two spoke together for another moment, then my friend told me, _She thinks it would be too much jostling for the infant. She is going home to brood. It will be my turn again soon."_

ET's `brother,' though, seemed eager. _I would greatly enjoy traveling with you. You creatures are as fascinating as you are amusing._

Charlie smiled, nuzzling against my sister's neck. It seemed he was going too.

 _Someone needs to escort Pabyeba and the egg home,_ ET suggested. _He may tire._ I decided I'd have to discuss this confusing gender thing with my friend soon.

 _I'll do it,_ Rilquza said.

Gertie, who by then had also taken one of the ear slugs, pleaded with him. "Please don't go!"

Rilquza's shoulders slumped. _Little one, we are not leaving forever. We have Vorxora's egg. We will meet up with you later._

Tolmina decided to go with him, but Colzest said he'd stay. Gertie smiled, but I could see Lori rolling her eyes.

My sister sighed, giving an uncertain nod. You couldn't exactly blame her, considering all we went through. You could tell Colzest understood he wasn't her favorite, but still put a comforting hand on her shoulder, nonverbally volunteering to come with.

 _"You guys coming?"_ Roy called from a fair distance away.

We hurriedly marched after him.

"Wait," Gertie said. "What about our stuff? What about Chewy and Wingy MacSaurus and Harry Bugbird?"

I crossed my arms. " _Gertie, those are their pets. They belong to the place."_

"They don't belong here any more than we do...or the bunnies or the deer."

I sighed. "Gertie, it's not the same. _They're animals._ They have smaller brains. They can be happy in those habitats."

" _The aliyums probably think the same thing about us._ "

 _I will ask about the animals,_ ET said. _But I have my own. I will show you. They are well cared for, as family...I am sorry, but the animals you met, must stay in the Amujru to test things we bring back from earth. We can find you other Dolcani, Nedcolku or Wokujo if you miss them._

"It won't be the same."

 _You can always come back here to visit them..._

I could tell my sister didn't like that idea either.

"C'mon, Gertie," I said. "You can't have everything."

We took a pod elevator down to another one of those giant caterpillar train things, filing into its furry interior amid a crowd of qulpari.

We took seats, waited for the transport to take off. "Is it really Christmas?" I asked.

Roy became thoughtful. "Honestly, I'm not sure. I've been here too long. These... _aliens_ have a different concept of time than we do. Nobody is in a rush to do anything, nobody worries about being late. Actually, that's one of the perks of living in this place."

"We left in November, " Lori said. "I know they kept us in that _zoo thing_ a long time, but I didn't think it was _that_ _freaking long!_ "

"I've read that time passes differently in space. There's been a few sci-fi novels where people leave the earth and a bunch of time passes while they're away. I seem to remember one where the guy comes back from space and finds out his baby daughter has become older than him."

Gertie started crying.

Roy came over and hugged her. " _Please, kid! It's just a book!_ I didn't mean that's what really happened!"

ET sighed. _I'm sorry. I thought 'Merry Christmas was merely a cheerful greeting. I have seen many recordings where humans say this and others smile in response._

I was glad to have a translator. "It's a _holiday greeting_ , ET. Did you notice how it's always snowing in those recordings?"

ET shrank a little in his seat. _I...thought they were just stories from a snowy country._

"What about the trees and the gifts?"

He frowned. _I...did not understand that part._

"I guess that's why you also told us happy birthday."

He nodded. _I_ did _think taking you out of the Amujru was a good present._

"None of us were born this month."

ET's eyes widened. _Oh!_ "Birth-Day. Date of birth." _I thought that's what it meant!_

I glanced at Roy. "You haven't taught these guys anything?"

The man shrugged. _"I thought I was the only human here."_

"Yeah, _but your birthday..."_

"I don't have an Earth calendar. It kind of lost its meaning after awhile."

"So there aren't any other humans here?" Lori asked.

Roy tapped his chest. "You're looking at the total human population. They _did_ have some air force pilots and stuff that wound up here, but they all got sent back during the Devil's Tower incident. _Before I arrived_. Actually, _it's okay. I'm happy for them._ " The look on his face didn't quite agree. "They got reunited with their families and everything. You know what I say? _Good for them!_ "

"What happened at Devil's Tower? You still haven't told us."

He opened his mouth to tell us, but at that moment ET asked, _What's Thanksgiving?_

I gave him a rough outline, you know, family gatherings, food, the pilgrims and so forth. "There's a cartoon called _Peanuts_ that explains it pretty well."

"I have an Indian friend that takes issue with that story," Roy commented.

"I don't see how. It basically shows the Pilgrims to be clueless. They would have starved without the Indians' help."

"Well, _there is that..."_

"What was that place we left? It was a zoo, wasn't it?"

Roy smirked. "That's just a decontamination area. They really don't have zoos here. They prefer to build nature habitats and let animals go free."

"ET," Gertie said. "Are you a boy or a girl?"

I stared at the alien. "I admit I'm kind of confused about that myself." I pointed to his `brother'. "And his explanation didn't help."

ET gave the man a look like _he_ should be telling her the answer.

Roy looked uncomfortable, nervously running his fingers through his hair. " _It's...a little unusual. I...kinda have to explain a few things...I don't know if your folks think you're old enough to learn where babies come from."_

My sister scowled at him. "I'm not going to see them for a long time, so you might as well tell me."

He rubbed his face. "Uh...kid, you know how _frogs_ make babies?"

Gertie wrinkled her nose. _"ET lays eggs in a pond?"_

Roy grinned. " _Sort of_. They don't exactly go down to the lake to lay them. They have little Jacuzzi things to put them in. And after they're fertilized, one of them dives in and carries them around in their mouth for awhile. Uh...and there's _three of them,_ not just a Mom and a Dad."

Lori scrunched her face in disgust. "Three?"

The man shrugged. "It's a... _little...more complicated than how we do things._ _Their parts...work differently._ "

I gawked at Meazquad. "Did you make Vorxora's egg?"

Looking embarrassed, he replied, " _Savyubmi,"_ which translates into English as "I made my contribution to the whole that is equal to that of my other two partners," or "I made my mutually balanced contribution to the egg." Both mean the same thing in their language. It seems like it would be a complicated, unpopular saying, but you could say the same thing about an Earth expression like "We made out last night." The word Savyubmi also finds use in business ventures and scientific projects, but only with the prefix ` _Jeb_.'

"I'm guessing they start out smaller," Lori said. "The egg I saw with... _Pabyeehaw_ looked too big to fit in her mouth. _"_

Roy chortled. "Right. They just don't stay in their mouths. One of them has to actually _carry them to term. In a different part of their body._ " He cleared his throat. "Let's just say that _certain things, when you see them, can't be unseen._ "

In seconds, the hairy subway thing sped us down a track, opening its swing doors on another platform.

This particular area featured a fountain with sculptures of qulpari and eggs. After hearing what Roy told us about alien babies, the statuary seemed a little... _obscene._

All around the structure there stood spherical vehicles (for lack of a better term). Qulpari would get in, and a set of large dragonfly wings would buzz them off to somewhere else in the jungle.

Roy opened the back hatch to one, ushering us inside. It resembled a fancy diving bell. Portholes all around, a long couch that went all the way around. Up front appeared to be the control center, two bug-like window bubbles and a dashboard thing with a little book sized computer. Once we got situated, Roy nonchalantly pushed a button and our vehicle rose into the air, flying over treetops and in between buildings.

"So. I haven't seen a game in awhile. Who won the last World Series? The Cubs?"

I shook my head. "Nope. _The Royals_."

" _Really!_ _I thought their team kinda sucked a little!"_

"They've got some good guys on the team. Especially George Brett, Saberhagen, and Frank White..."

" _I'll take your word on that."_

"Okay. Story time." Roy took a seat, crossing his legs. "I used to work for Indianapolis Power and Light. We started getting a lot of power outage reports around Muncie, so they sent me down there to investigate." He sighed. _"UFO's_. One of them came flying right over my truck."

Roy pointed to his face. "Can you see any scarring? _I kinda got burned._ "

I shook my head.

"The guys here healed most of it...Anyway, I got a _little obsessed_ about the whole thing. I kept seeing... _visions_...of Devil's Tower. I didn't know what it was at first. MY wife thought I was crazy because I kept sculpting it, over and over again, _mashed potatoes, Play-Doh, dirt from the yard..._ It, uh... _put some strain on our marriage._ "

The man coughed, looking a little sad. "So, to make a long story short, I eventually figured out what I was seeing and took a trip to Wyoming. The government had set up camp there, trying to communicate with the qulpari mothership. I helped them. _Turns out they like music_."

Lori furrowed her brow. "They government didn't arrest you or anything?"

"Oh _they did_ , but _they knew I had a connection with the aliens._ They actually put me with a team of people that were supposed to go as earth's representatives in space. The qulpari chose me from five other people picked for the mission."

 _Our chieftains were very impressed with him,_ ET agreed. _He has provided much valuable information for our research teams, especially his knowledge of your planet's conservation issues._

" _Lucky you,_ " Lori muttered. "We didn't have nearly as much of a fun time."

Our vehicle clanked against a sort of track on one of the trees, and it turned itself into an aerial rail car.

The aliens had a masterful skill at building things right on the sides of trees without killing anything, and I'm talking big glass and steel industrial stuff, beautiful stonework and sculptures. We were so busy gawking that we didn't talk for several minutes.

"So what's your story?" Roy prompted. "Where's your parents?"

We told him everything worth telling.

 _I'm sorry I couldn't be there with you,_ ET told us. _But I knew you were intelligent and could understand my instructions._ He turned to look at Colzest. _So they have manifested Yobzara._

 _Yes, but they are bad at it. It is dangerous. They killed our friend._

 _Practicing with rocks was not a good idea!_

 _We feared they were violent. We needed to test their aggressiveness somehow._

"Hmmm..." ET said, rubbing his chin.

Colzest opened a container, taking out a ball. I don't know what sport it was for, it kind of looked like a squishy hedge apple with rubbery hairs sticking out of it. He levitated it into the air, flung it at Gertie.

She ducked. "Did you want me to pass it back?"

Colzest nodded.

"Sorry. I'll try again."

The two used their powers to ping-pong it back and forth. Roy stared in shocked disbelief. " _I didn't know she could do that!"_

I shrugged. _"Can you?"_

He shook his head. "So far my only alien superpower is making homemade pizza...and... _some passable attempts at ice cream."_

"I still don't get it," I said to ET. "My sister is more powerful than I am, and I've been _way closer_ to you."

The alien smirked. _I do not play favorites. I love all three of you equally. There are many ways to manifest Yobzara. Neither one of you is more powerful than the other, you have just developed different skills. For example, your sister would not have been able to communicate with me from such a long range without you helping her. There are many other skills. We can take you to a place to have your abilities tested, see what you are capable of._

"Do you have any guesses about what I might be... _good at?_ "

 _We have a ritual, the Yojdisib. It may give us an indication._

"How did Gertie get..." I avoided use of the word `powerful.' "... _To have those amazing gifts_ anyway?"

"When we first met, me and ET sat on the floor and held hands," Gertie said as she levitated the ball around. "We looked into each other's eyes, and I started getting... _ideas...seeing things._ I felt I knew ET's name, but I didn't know how to say it in words, just...a picture of a purple forest, and two moons, and a bunch of pretty flowers. I guess it's a place. And then, I felt this... _jolt_ go through me, kinda a nice, happy feeling. I felt...really good...I got this idea like I could do _anything._ "

She wiped blood away from her nose. The ball dropped to the floor. "I should stop."

"I don't think you should mess with that stuff, Elliott," Lori warned. "It doesn't look like it's good for you. _I mean, look at her!_ "

Gertie gave a halfhearted nod. _"Maybe not if you do it all day long..._ My head hurts."

Roy opened his mouth to say something, but ET replied, _We have some medicine that might help you._

By the time we finished telling Roy our story, the diving bell thing had docked at another platform.

We came out in front of an enormous building shaped like a cactus with onion domes serving as its spines. We strolled around rows of gurgling fountains, passing dozens of merchants of various ages, shapes and sizes, that sold all kinds of weird stuff. A lot of plants, glowing things, computer devices, beads, tapestries, woodcraft, textiles, and _food_.

"Are they still making _Mork and Mindy_ episodes?" Roy asked me.

I shrugged and gave him a nod.

"You ever think of leaving here?" Lori asked Roy. "You know, _back to your wife?_ "

"Not really. _She'd never understand_. Like I said, she left with the kids the moment I started making sculptures." He gave her a smile that seemed a little forced. " _But I moved on, found a niche for myself here._ It's... _a little strange..._ still...kinda figuring things out...but I moved on!" he said it like he were trying to convince himself. His nervous laugh didn't convince me either. "Got some friends here... _good friends. The best!"_

A lot of the sellers had large dome tents, made of tough metals or a material like concrete. Roy led us up to one of these, talking to a grandmotherly looking old Abreya and its much younger looking friend of the same species.

"These guys are great!" Roy said. "They know just how to fit me. Never had a problem with them."

We stared.

"What are we doing _here?"_ Lori asked.

Roy rolled his eyes. "Tell me something. _How much clothing did you bring? Your outfits look a little_ dingy _._ " He held up a display piece. "This stuff is super comfortable. No scratching, no tags, stretchy, cool in the summer, warm in the winter. You hardly notice you're wearing it."

The old creature smiled at us.

"I'll take one," Gertie said. "They look cute."

 _"Cute!"_ I groaned.

Roy gave me a look that said 'are you kidding me?' "Who are you trying to impress, kid? _Your friends at school?_ " I could see the man regretted saying it the moment the words left his mouth.

Lori stormed out.

" _Oh Jeez,"_ Roy groaned. "I'm sorry. _I knew it was a touchy subject..."_

I marched to the entrance of the tent, but the man stopped me. "Let her go. I think she needs time to cool off. I'm sure she'll come back eventually."

Out the opening, he yelled, "Look, I'm sorry! We'll be waiting for you, okay!...Don't get lost!"

He patted me on the shoulder consolingly. " _She'll be back._ I mean, _where's she going to go?_ "

I looked at ET, expected him to say something in disagreement, but he only shrugged.

The old female scanned Gertie with a laser, typed something into a computerized silkworm-like machine, and it immediately started squeezing out fabric.

The younger Abreya, about my sister's age, waved to her with his tail, introducing himself as Bacon Okrasmuc. The two started playing tag around the tent.

ET asked me about the little demonstration I'd given him when we'd first met. Apparently he hadn't understood a few things, like the `plastic gods' I played with (He-Man and Skeletor), why I'd sullied an aquarium with a plastic scuba diver toy, and if I'd brought any more `orange sticks.'

As far as the latter went, I thought he meant carrots, but then he said, _No, no, the ones that are crunchy and have salt._

I smiled. " _Cheetos,_ you mean? Sorry, no..."

"Oh man," Roy groaned. "Please don't ever say that word again. If there's anything that makes me homesick, it's thinking about... _that_ , or _Kentucky Fried Chicken,_ or _...beer,_ or _...an A &W float. _Granted, _my body has been completely purged from impurities_ , but to be honest _I wouldn't mind a little impurity now and then_. They're the number one reason I don't volunteer for their little `Boob Tube' project. _If I see one more hamburger commercial..."_ He gave a dramatic shudder. "I've been driving Norenio crazy with cooking experiments. I think we almost mastered the Twinkie. That and _nachos with salsa. You should try them. They're to die._ "

Roy took a little device out of his pocket, talking to someone, actually _arguing_ with someone for about five minutes. Not the same language that ET spoke.

Gertie, in the meantime, received a vaguely kimono-like outfit, lots of wild colorful floral designs. She got underwear too, but the alien apparently didn't know the difference between male and female clothing, so it came out male. I've heard girls like to wear men's boxers sometimes, so Gertie didn't seem to mind that much. When she got older, though, I imagined there would be some awkward conversations with our tailor.

I kept glancing at the crowd outside, hoping to see Lori come back, but she never did. I was beginning to get a little worried.

Roy put his device away, forced a smile. "Hey. Did Gumvupu get your measurements yet?...You know, I could talk to her about maybe getting some _skull designs_ or maybe the Superman logo or something, if you're really bothered by the look. Me, I kinda think about them like Hawaiian shirts...or those Indians in Florida that have the long dress things."

He noticed the face I made when he said `dress'. "Okay, _maybe not that_ , but _have you seen what Korean guys wear to weddings?"_

Rolling my eyes, I said, "Fine. Just give me a tie dye or something."

Roy communicated the order.

We saw another Abreya Entering the tent, this one a relatively taller and younger female.

The creature looked different from ones I'd seen so far. If not for the furry body and the opossum-like tail, I would have thought her a different species entirely. Humanoid but oddly guinea pig-like facial features, eyes with minus sign goat pupils, large rounded ears that gave her a mousy appearance. The hair was short atop her head, Bob haircut, green colored, contrasting nicely with the squirrel-like brown pelt.

I thought this was a customer at first, coming back for another bug wing halter and long loincloth combo matching the one she wore, but in a different style. But then I saw Roy take her in his arms, grasping her tail as he muttered to her in the other, unfamiliar language. The female smiled, kissed him on the mouth.

The female's eyes widened when she noticed me staring. She pulled away from the man, gave me this look like nothing at all unusual had occurred. "Hi children," she said in clear but accented English.


	24. Chapter 24: Relationships

Just when I thought I had finished staring at the man for being bizarre, I was gawking again.

"Kids," Roy said. "Meet _Norenio Vokes_ , my plus one. Like I said, _it's been a little strange..._ "

I frowned, not even paying attention as Gumvupu scanned me with her laser and started processing fabric. Not even old Gumvupu politely insisting, for the fifth time, that Gertie try on her new apparel, could get my attention.

Of course, the scenery had something to do with it too. There wasn't much in the way of decor in the tent, just the old alien's bio-mechanical fabric... _fabricators,_ some ornately woven abstract rugs, and outfits that looked like they'd been crafted from huge insect wings. The human apparel seemed to be a side item, like egg rolls in a donut shop.

Roy. Shacking up. With a random space creature. What else could be in this carnival sideshow? " _That's your new wife?_ "

Norenio's eyes widened. A hand flew to her side like she were checking for a seatbelt. I'd later find out that's where the Abreya heart is located.

The man laughed nervously. " _Wife? No!_ Oh my God, I'm forgetting my own language...what's ` _Plus One_ ' supposed to mean?"

I thought I knew the answer, but then I started wondering myself.

 _"Never mind,"_ he sighed.

Norenio jabbered with Roy for a moment. " _Wife?_ " she kept asking, pointing to her chest. She looked excited. "Yes? _You husband?_ "

ET smiled, gave a few polite little claps, muttered to Colzest.

Colzest gave Roy a thumbs up. _"Yeahhh!"_

Blushing furiously, Mr. Neary shook his head, waved his hands. "Whoa, wait! _No one's getting married!"_

Norenio let out a noise like a dog with its tail being stepped on. The Qulpari shrank a little.

Roy grabbed the female's hand. _"Nadwila..."_ I think that's some kind of affectionate term.

The Abreya put her hands on her hips. _"Marry when!"_

"Uh, _not yet_." He responded back in the other language, pantomiming rocking a baby, then `Nothing' and `Where?'

She frowned. "I'm beginning to think _we're_ nothing."

 _"Oh honey-!"_ He pulled her close in an embrace, rattled out a few more things.

Charlie purred, nuzzled against Gertie's neck, then flitted out of the tent. When my sister tried to run after him, Roy grabbed her by the collar, stopping her from leaving. "Don't run off."

 _"But you let_ Lori _run off!"_ she protested.

 _"Yeah? That's because she's older."_

 _"That's not fair!"_

Roy sighed in frustration. " _Life's not fair._ Look. I already got one kid to hunt down. I'd like to figure out where the first one went off to before I go looking for you..." He scowled. _"Thought she'd be back by now..."_

As he continued bickering with his...` _non wife,'_ ET said something to him.

"Hey! This is _my mess_ , little guy, _not yours! Why don't you butt out!"_

More arguing.

With a sigh, the young Abreya gave me and Gertie an exaggerated wave. Apparently eager to practice a language that she had no other use for, she launched into a speech that seemed a little obvious: "My name is Norenio Vokes. I am Roy Neary's girlfriend, _because he is my boyfriend!..._ In _Murtux_ , the word is the same for both: `Ik najufe dusvo Royneary.' `Roy Neary is my _najufe, my mating partner.'"_

Roy visibly cringed.

"Uh, nice to meet you, Norenio," I stammered.

The female smiled. "I and Roy Neary are _in a relationship_. _We have slept together many times._ Roy Neary thinks we will not make an egg, _but I am trying very hard. We try hard together._ I even wear special costumes-"

I noticed, the more she spoke, the more red faced Roy became. "Norenio!" he cried. _"No! Impolite!"_

The two reverted to Murtux as they got into an argument, the female saying something about how talking about bed clothing hurt no one's feelings, Roy arguing that children shouldn't be hearing about all that.

Shaking his head in annoyance, Colzest propped himself up against a counter and took a siesta.

At last, Norenio told me, "I am sorry. I have committed _xensadru_ , a... _social embarrassment_."

 _"Faux pas,"_ Roy corrected.

After she practiced the phrase with him a couple times, she nodded to us. "I have committed a... _faux...pas._ I am sorry."

I tried not to look too disgusted. "It's okay."

Norenio smiled at her ` _najufe_.' "He says it is okay." Then, to me, "Roy Neary loves me, but he is shy."

Gertie had just stepped behind a dressing screen and changed. When Norenio saw this, she knelt down to my level, looking me and my sister in the eyes. " _You look...very...nice."_

"Uh, thank you." But then I pointed to Gertie. _"Honestly, she looks nicer."_

The alien blinked, not comprehending. "How...are...you...doing?"

"Uh, fine, I guess. _Honestly, I'm a little concerned about Lori..._ "

Norenio cast a questioning look back at Roy. They had a brief Murtux dialog.

"She's going to turn up eventually," the man said. "All we have to do is ask someone if they've seen the other creature they'd taken into the Amujru a few days ago... _Or a pale long legged thing with hair on top of its head and dirty clothes._ "

I pointed to his najufe. " _I thought you said you were alone._ As in, _by yourself._ "

Roy and Norenio got into a heated argument, the female's tail snapping more and more angrily the more they talked.

ET flinched at these outbursts, shrinking back like a spider before a flame. Colzest only stirred from his slumber, rolling his eyes.

Norenio crossed her arms, looking indignant. "Hmph!"

We both stared as she walked out in a fuming huff. Roy called after her, but she didn't turn around.

 _"Guess I'm alone now,"_ the man grumbled.

Colzest growled.

"Yeah? I know it's disharmonious! Tell me something I don't know! _Did_ you _do anything to stop her?_ No, I don't think so, you're just being _nosy!_ You need to butt out too, mister!"

ET and Colzest exchanged knowing looks.

The old tailor lady showed me my completed outfit. To be honest, too much pink and purple for my taste, and it had girly lace trim, but it was clean. I thanked her and put it on.

Tired of staring at the same textiles, I marched to the tent entrance.

 _"Where are_ you _going?"_ the man asked.

 _"To look for Lori._ It's boring in here."

Roy took a deep breath. " _Right_. Of course you know we'll have to come back to get her outfit."

I shrugged.

An angry squawk and an indignant look indicated that Roy had carelessly squashed a Qulpari foot in his haste to leave the tent. As he uttered profuse apologies, he bowled over another Qulpari. Both Colzest and ET slowly shook their heads, muttering to each other.

We all spread out, doing a rough sweep of the area, asking everyone if they'd seen someone that looked like me and Gertie. My ear slug was biting, so I switched ears. ET got me a bottle of spray that made my ears all gunky and gross, to keep the thing fed.

Although I knew I'd probably regret it the moment I asked, a question had been bugging me since the first moment I'd heard of Roy's ' _relationship.'_ "Where's _your_ third partner?" I asked the man. "I mean, _if you really want your girlfriend back-_ "

Roy reddened, probably imagining something I didn't mean to imply. "Abreyas aren't Qulpari, kid. It only takes a _wumloq_ and a _yuxhauba_ to produce an egg, and frankly I have serious doubts that my human wumloq has the correct microbial content to make any sort of impact on her equipment. I mean, _besides entertainment._ "

"Yeah, but _what if something happens?_ "

"A yuxhauba looks like _calamari._ It'd pretty much defy everything I know about biology, and to tell the truth, _I'm not sure I'd want to see what the baby would look like._ "

I shuddered, tried to get the visual out of my head.

Lori popped out from under a rug display, looking a bit guilty and suspicious, like she were avoiding someone.

She glanced at me and laughed. _"Nice outfit_!"

I stared. It seemed she had found clothing of her own during her absence. Instead of her old outfit, she now wore a blue princess sleeved catsuit, decorated with feathers, beaded fringe and abstract embroidery. "Wow! Where did you get _that?_ "

Lori looked pleased that I admired her apparel. " _Those Abreya guys are really nice._ One of them even let me mess around with his sewing machine." She pointed to a butterfly on her chest. " _I did that one._ It's super easy, like drawing on paper." She showed me a couple other ones, a heart, a happy face, Garfield's head, a bear...

"That's nothing, though. _Check this out!_ " She held up a beautiful gold inlaid bracelet with glowing stones all over it.

I frowned. " _And where did you get_ that?"

Lori grinned. "I was just wandering around in their fish market, _and they had this jewelry display -nobody around anywhere!_ I couldn't believe my luck-"

A second later, she was floating upside down, a pair of stern faced Qulpari in gold 'bone' breastplates holding up glowing hands, levitating her as a third trapped her in a balloon.

"Uh, Lori? _You probably shouldn't have taken that thing._ "

My girlfriend did a backflip inside the bubble, attempting to escape. "Really? _No shit!_ "


	25. Chapter 25: Trial

Lori fought, but wasn't any closer to getting out of the bubble than she was before. The Qulpari motioned for us to follow them through the marketplace. Merchants and passerby rubbernecked.

 _"Mudo mudo!_ " ET groaned, rubbing his face.

"She's new," Roy called in Wumpaza. It's a xensadru _."_ The onlookers seemed to accept this explanation, muttering to each other, a surprising number appearing to lose interest entirely.

Our destination was a small geodesic dome covered in dark bubble windows. About halfway there, Norenio stepped in our path, arguing with Roy, yelling, pointing at the bubble. Something about it being his fault, he should have been watching her and all that. She even scolded ET and Colzest a little, but Roy was clearly the main object of her wrath.

Something must have gotten resolved between the two, for then, snapping her tail, the female frowned at me and my sister with her hands on her hips. "I am your _natvop_ now. Watch you so you do not xensadru Qulpari." It seemed her English had broken with her relationship. I guess that _does_ tend to happen when you're angry.

"Charlie!" Gertie cried.

I glanced her way and saw the flying creature again perched on her shoulder, nuzzling her face.

 _"Where did you go? I was worried!"_

Charlie made a jaunty `I don't know' noise, like she'd just asked it how many gumdrops were in the world or something. "Mmm-mm!"

"Well, _don't go off again!"_

We followed the breastplate wearing Qulpari (they're called _Navnadbu_ ) into the dome. I don't know what I was expecting, but this wasn't it.

The interior of the building had been grown from plants, bent into a vaguely courtroom-like form. A _small_ courtroom. The desks of the prosecutor and defendant _faced_ each other across an open floor.

A scowling Qulpari in a gold and purple robe, likely the bracelet vendor, got to look Lori right in the eyes once her bubble got situated.

Two judges in paisley robes took stands overlooking the two, their expressions reminding me of a pair of chess experts sizing each other up. One judge wore a headband with silver moose horns, weirdly crooked like the mounted trophy head they have on the _Addam's Family_. The other judge's horns bent the opposite way.

Both the defendant and the prosecutor had one bench behind them, for the jury, I supposed. The strange thing was, our prosecutor only had one present. And Lori...she also had only one.

"What's going on?" I whispered to Roy.

 _"What's it look like?"_

"Where's the lawyers?"

"They don't have those here. Prosecutor and defendant have to rely on their own eloquence."

"That doesn't seem right. What about the jury of peers?"

He pointed to Lori's lone juror. "You can say that _I have little faith in the American justice system_ , but I always thought they put too many people in courtrooms. I mean, you either get a hung jury, or everyone agrees on the same thing...plus _where are they going to find a human jury on such short notice?_ "

"Why two judges?"

"One views the case from the defendant's point of view. The other from the prosecutor."

"That doesn't seem very... _objective._ "

He put a hand on my shoulder. "All Qulpari learn conflict resolution at an early age. It's as basic as math to them. Once in a lifetime, every one of them serves as judge. They only sit at trial once, and then someone else replaces them. There is no legal career."

He led me, my sister, ET and Colzest to a bench running around the outside, gesturing for us to sit.

The judges let out mooing sounds. The room, which had been a little noisy before, fell dead silent. It seemed they did not have gavels on their planet.

"Okay," Roy whispered. "Just sit tight and be quiet."

"But she doesn't know any of their laws!" I hissed. "How-!"

Everyone was staring at me, annoyed at the interruption. I sank in my seat.

There's a lot of terminology involved in the Qulpari court system, and they don't exactly translate into English or American concepts. To avoid confusion, I will just describe them with English approximations. The _Ziemuber_ , for example, was the title of the judge that sat at Lori's right side, _Veryowax_ on the left, but for simplicity I will just call them Right Judge and Left Judge for the most part. The prosecutor guy is called a _Coocovna_ , the witness is a _Raxliya_ , and _Sedvamsa_ is the collective term for our two jurors, but I won't be using those terms either. You're losing a lot of the authentic flavor, but it can't be helped.

"The prosecutor presents his dispute," said Right Judge.

 _The creature has stolen my Ridvucha,_ said the creature in purple. _She wears it right now._

A breastplated Navnadbu officer took the bracelet out of Lori's bubble, bringing the object before Right Judge.

 _Do you have evidence of it being theft?_

The prosecutor placed a disk on a post in the middle of the room. I watched, with discomfort, as a holographic Lori darted out from behind a tent in the market, snatching up the bracelet.

 _Prosecutor, is there a witness?_

The prosecutor called forth a Qulpari from the back wall. _I saw it happen,_ the creature agreed.

"I want a lawyer!" Lori shouted.

Both judges made noises like cats coughing up hairballs. ET and Colzest were glaring too, not appearing to be any more sympathetic than the others.

I stood up, but Roy pulled me back down in the chair.

"Do something!" I cried.

 _"She's fine!"_

More stares and hairball sounds. Charlie, who had curled up in my sister's lap and gone to sleep, cracked one eyelid open.

 _"Mudo,"_ ET complained.

 _Witness, have you finished testimony?_ Right Judge asked.

The `witness' nodded. _My testimony is complete._

Right Judge waved to his antlered counterpart, the Veryowax _._

Left Judge ordered Lori to be brought before him, took a deep breath. _Please explain._

Lori sighed. "Look. _I...know you saw what I did._ I...I thought since he just left everything sitting out, I could just take it."

Left Judge (Veryowax) looked disgusted. _Is this common practice where you come from?_

Visibly embarrassed, she answered, "Only if you're a bad person. I'm sorry. Please don't take me to jail."

The Veryowax looked confused. _What is jail?_

 _"Really?_ " Lori said with a half laugh. _"You seriously don't know?"_

This provoked a look of annoyance. _Do not waste the court's time._

"Please. I'm just a kid. I'm a _baby_...An... _egg,_ I guess you'd say. However you punish people here, please go easy on me. I don't know anything about your rules. Anyways, _you have your bracelet back._ That counts for something, doesn't it?"

The two judges looked at each other, then typed furiously on little computers.

The two judges locked eyes with each other. _We believe_ Quarjabbe _would be the best resolution._

Right Judge nodded. _I accept the_ Quarjabbe _according to the terms of_ The Nuqpurhu _._

Nuqpurhu, I've been told, is their great law book, which is part of a giant computerized library of law.

"Quarjabbe?" Lori whimpered. "What's Quarjabbe?"

 _You work for pretty Ridvucha, you earn credit for Ridvucha, you buy Ridvucha."_

"No! _That's a terrible idea!_ "

 _You said you are hatchling. You knew little. Yatgibi teach you._

 _Do the jurors agree with this decision?_ Asked Left Judge.

Lori's juror spoke with the juror of the prosecutor for a few minutes, then they both raised glowing fingers, nodding to the judges. _It is satisfactory._

The two judges mooed, signaling the end of the trial.

Satisfied that their job had been done, passed the prosecutor beads (as a document of the case) and marched out of the room. The Navnadbu, likewise, appeared to have no complaints, at last releasing Lori from the bubble.

Roy took us to the side of the room. "What the hell were you thinking? _Stealing from a jewelry guy? Are you serious?_ My God, didn't your mommy and daddy ever tell you it's wrong to take things without paying for them?"

Lori looked...less than apologetic. _"I spent a week squatting in an abandoned factory and stealing stuff from a neighbor's house, so..."_

Roy pinched her sleeve. "Where did you get _this thing? Do we need to stay here and wait for an angry merchant to show up?"_

Lori shook her head. _"It was a gift. He said I was pretty._ His face turned green, but I think he was _blushing."_

 _"She has met Oxnizjel,_ " Norenio said in Murtux. To Lori, she said, "Be careful around that one. He is... _mischievous._ "

 _"That's one way to put it,"_ Roy groaned.

 _"No take Ridvucha without pay,_ " ET told my girlfriend. _"Bad."_

Lori gave him a look that said `Are you being serious right now?' Because the message was fairly obvious to everyone at this point. Her brow furrowed, nonverbally telegraphing, `Please tell me you're not that stupid.'

Roy rubbed his face in frustration. "So... _Lori._ You're going to discover firsthand what a Quarjabbe consists of."

He led us up to the merchant (his name was Yatgibi _)_ , speaking to him for several minutes.

Lori still had a translator in her hear, so she got the idea pretty quickly. "We're going to be his indentured servants! That's it, isn't it? _Keep us in debt for the rest of our lives?"_

"Trust me, on earth there are student loans with worse terms and conditions."

Yatgibi shot Lori in the neck with a little gun.

"Hey!" she cried, touching the wound.

Not much of a wound, really, just a bruise.

"That's just insurance so you don't skip out on the deal," Roy explained. "He's going to let us take care of room and board, you just have to work for him for a few weeks and your Quarjabbe will be complete."

 _"So I can eat dinner? And go to bed?"_

"It's not slavery, kid. Be thankful these guys don't know how to be that devious."

We returned to Gumvupu's textile shop, Roy ordering a new outfit for Lori. "I want to speak to this Oxnizjel personally and _make sure_ we don't owe him anything," he explained. _"In the meantime... change."_

Lori's replacement outfit wasn't flattering. It had _vertical stripes_ in _Aquafresh_ _and rainbow sherbet colors_. "Great," Lori complained. _"Now they'll know about prison uniforms._ "

"I take it you're not a fan of Andrew Lloyd Webber," Roy said. _"Odd, because you almost had a disco thing going with that jumpsuit..._ "

Lori looked unimpressed. " _Can we go, please?"_

Another transport station stood at the opposite end of the market. Winged spheroids, just like before, except these wings functioned like propellers, and the vehicles were purple. We boarded and rode in silence, taking in the scenery.

"How do you pay for things anyway?" Lori asked.

Still a little angry, Roy maintained a Stony silence.

"He donates his body to science," Norenio said.

Looking embarrassed, Roy said, "I shouldn't be talking to you, but...I occasionally donate blood and other stuff and do tests for them to earn _xuthas_. Money. Sometimes they pay me for my information. Mostly, though, I do off jobs for them. Cooking, cleaning, whatever they want. There's a lot of demand for tall people."

"I am his _best-customer_ ," said Norenio.

" _Was_ ," Roy corrected.

"What? _Gevteh_?"

 _"Was_ his best customer. Past tense."

She frowned at him. "That means ` _no longer_!' Do you truly not love me, Roy Neary?"

The man sighed, frustrated. "It's only English grammar." He shook his head. "Never mind. _Use present tense, I don't care._ " They argued something about this. "I'll give you lessons later."

The Abreya gave Lori a vigorous nod. " _He is my best customer._ At first he paid me with xuthas, but one day he came by and didn't have any. I asked if he was hungry and he said yes, but he couldn't afford anything, unless I would accept work. so I cooked, and had him clean the dishes. Next say, he was broken again-"

 _"Broke,_ " Roy corrected.

"That is not good grammar. You have said this."

The man just rolled his eyes.

"For some time after, I made him work in the kitchen. Then I said to him, I will give you a free meal if I can see your no-clothing-birthday-suit. I always saw him in clothing, and I was curious. He was shy. He said no. I offered him _many_ free meals. Qulpari has already seen your no-clothing I said. Do not overcharge. He eventually accepted."

Lori stuck out her tongue. _"Lovely. We're going to be raised by a stripper."_

Norenio gave Roy a questioning look. The man's anger, which had been momentarily deferred, now came back in full force. The Abreya had to prompt him a second time to get a response.

The couple had a conversation that ended with him embarrassed and her laughing. "He is not a good `stripper.' He stripper only for me and Qulpari scientist. No one else wants to see."

 _"I know_ I _don't!"_

Norenio laughed. "Roy Neary makes a better bell-man-luggage-carrier. _Big manly muscles._ "

Lori snorted, suppressing a laugh.

"Are we still having a tour?" Gertie asked.

ET nodded, saying something, but Roy disagreed. He said apologies to the Qulpari, addressed us children in English. "Sorry, but no. _You three are grounded._ "

"You're not our dad," Lori pointed out.

Roy's face flushed with anger. " _I'm your guardian. I've had kids of my own,_ and I'm the only human on this planet that knows about your existence and cares about your human problems. It's my job to make sure you don't die, get hurt, or get into legal problems like the one we just had, because, believe it or not, I care about you guys and want what's best for you. Maybe send you back to your parents in a better condition than I found you."

 _"But I didn't do anything!"_ Gertie protested. "Why should _I_ get punished?"

Roy answered, " _Because. I'm only one man, and I can't split myself in half_ to send _girlfriend_ home while the rest of you get in _more trouble._ "

 _"We won't get in trouble! Honest!"_

Roy wasn't buying it. He just crossed his arms.

"Why can't ET or Colzest take us on a tour? _Me and Elliott were good!"_

 _"They watched you last time, and you see how well that worked!_ "

 _"You're the one who let her go!_ "

He was seething now, and my sister could see it. "Oh-okay, what about Norenio? She's a good guardian, right?"

Norenio looked excited about the idea, but Roy argued her out of it. "I agree. _It is late_. You should have _food_ and _rest._ "

"It's not _that_ late. I'm not tired, just hungry. _For lunch._ "

Norenio asked Roy about this, but he just shook his head, jabbered something back. "Lori must begin Quarjabbe. We _will_ tour Vorxora's home. Make... _yourselves at home._ You have not seen it yet, so it will be new... _We have not seen it either._ "

I rolled my eyes, but accepted the explanation.

In a lower tone, she added, " _Maybe I give you a tour later._ "

 _"I heard that_!" Roy scolded.

"She has Quarjabbe! She will be punished enough! Do not be unreasonable, najufe!"

Roy rubbed his eyes, his eyebrow ridge, like he had a headache. " _We'll see."_

"When can I stop wearing this candy cane outfit?" Lori asked.

"When I say you can, Ms. Newton John," came the mirthless reply. "Like I said, we have to find this Oxnizjel and see why you really got a free outfit. I've never heard of an Abreya fencing product, but you never know."

I myself had my own theories, ones that made me jealous the more I thought about them.

The Qulpari constructed vast elaborate bas reliefs along the barks of trees, not with chisel but somehow grown that way. I was continually amazed at the level of detail. Of course, we never paused long enough for me to figure out what was going on in those images, what it all meant.

Large amounts of Abreyas and Qulpari, it seemed, lived in buildings that resembled gourd bird houses. The things hung precariously from the boughs of trees, connected by catwalks, platforms, ladders and terraces. Our vehicle clamped onto a skyway, riding to a stop on a mezzanine.

The hatch came open, and we followed ET down a ramp, down a lengthy balcony alongside rows of gourd buildings decorated with colorful banners and totem statues. The Qulpari were friendly, smiling and waving glowing fingers at us as we passed.

We stopped in front of a plain brown gourd building marked with an American flag. As I frowned, puzzling over how he managed to get such a flag, with all fifty stars accurately sown into it, I noticed something even weirder: ET's totem statue was Elvis Presley.

ET gestured to the door. "Welcome home."


	26. Chapter 26: Quarjabbe

It was a strangely proportioned image of Elvis, more like a Qulpari than a person, but I couldn't say anything bad about it, any more than I could complain about pictures of black Santa Claus, or Asian Bible pictures. If something means something to you, you tend to make it personal, and honestly, race is rarely an important detail.

That being said, Qulpari Elvis's hair, outfit and pose were perfect. It was unmistakably 'the King.'

Despite the Elvis, ET's house wasn't that kitschy. In fact, it seemed vaguely modern Asian in style. Wood construction, brush paintings, low table with floor cushions instead of chairs. A script that resembled Afaka decorated panels on the walls, but the ear slug didn't gift me with reading ability, so I had no clue about their meaning.

The weird thing, though, was the fact they had _actual grass_ for carpeting, and food plants growing from the walls and ceiling. Off to one side stood a translucent blue green thing resembling a jellyfish, as big as a king sized bed. ET informed me it _actually was_ a bed, called a jamassi. At his prompting, I sat on it. Although scary at first, it did not try to swallow me like a blob, it only looked like one. In terms of firmness, I'd compare it to a waterbed. After a conversation with Pabyeba, he apologized, told me this was a bed for her, Meazquad and himself, but he'd set out guest pallets for us three children. The ones he showed us _did_ resemble puffy mattresses,so I figured we'd be okay.

His house had a study, a store room and a kitchen. A room on the lower level of the gourd house contained their air conditioning system - like an ondol, it warmed or cooled areas of the floor you stood on (the places not covered in grass, of course) but it somehow also altered the temperature of the whole building without the use of pipes or ducts -some kind of energy efficient system based on pressurized air.

"A spider!" Lori suddenly cried, stomping the floor.

ET waved his hand, and the spider flew up into his palm. _Please. Calm yourself. We use spiders to regulate the population of flying insects_. And he placed it in a web near the door.

Lori shuddered.

The bathroom had that standard pitcher plant type of toilet. he new thing, though, was the shower. You stepped into a capsule with an air mask, and the liquid would cycle over you, dishwasher-like a couple times, filtered and refiltered so you got clean, and pipes took the waste water out, filtered, to irrigate the houses plant life.

I peeked into the room where they kept the egg laying jacuzzi, but I could tell it was a source of embarrassment for ET and his... _mates_ , like looking into his underwear drawer or something.

Their stove had some sort of electrical power source, operating like a hot plate, but nothing in the house had power plugs. Roy suggested that the aliens had actualized Nikola Tesla's dream of wireless electricity.

I could tell Gertie was happy to see Pabyeba, Tolmina, and Meazquad again. She grinned, becoming a lot more lively and talkative, especially when she met ET's catfish-like pet Wotrevi, a speckly version of Chewie.

When Roy discovered Gertie had brought along a tape deck, _his mood_ improved too. He pushed play, chuckling as he listened to _Against All Odds._ "You bring any other tapes?"

She shrugged. "I had one with _Monster Mash_ and the _Purple People Eater_ but we went to _that place_ without it. I don't know where it is now."

Lori asked the man, "Don't your alien friends have music recordings and stuff?"

"There's...a lot to go through, and the sound quality isn't always that good. They practically have the library of Congress on their systems, but without the helpful categorization. I end up wading through a lot of redundant stuff, car commercials, the TV movie of the week (without the picture), V2 stations, _The People's Court_ , talk radio...sorting all that crap kinda feels like work. It takes a lot of time, and nobody seems to understand that having music on a program or a commercial doesn't make it a song, especially if it's Juicy Fruit and Big Red gum...I've developed a taste for _their_ _music_ , kinda out of laziness than anything else."

For lunch, we had _Abgigta_ , "vegetable pockets," basically, a fried food similar to crab Rangoon, but it's stuffed with something that tastes like spicy cornbread with peas and tofu in it. We sat on the floor pillows and ate around the low table.

We introduced ourselves to our hosts, told them whatever they didn't know about us, our world, and how we got there.

Lori, after taking a few bites of one abgigta, suddenly screamed and jumped up, spitting out mouthfuls. ET's pet rushed up and gobbled it up.

" _I just ate a bug!_ " I opened my own, frowning at the chitinous leg sticking out of the yellow mash. _So... not entirely vegetarian._

 _"Kids in Ethiopia would kill_ to have a meal like this," Roy commented as he devoured one. "Can't you pretend it's a crawdad?"

Gertie nodded, gulping down hers. " _Do you have chocolate covered ants here?_ "

Lori stared at her in disgust. "Were you this weird _before you met ET?_ "

My sister just kept stuffing her face.

Lori turned to scowl at ET. "I thought you guys were vegetarian."

He answered, "The babomco are abundant. There are _millions_ of them. According to Qemqovi religious text, we do not kill things that have endoskeleton, but the swarming babomco can be our food."

That, and microbes, I thought. "How come Colzest and the others didn't eat those on the moon?"

 _They were not in season_ , Tolmina said. _We were in the process of restocking._

"And you didn't have grasshoppers or cockroaches you could eat?"

Colzest smiled. _I didn't know you wanted any._ We would have shared.

Tolmina gave me a nod. _Your recordings demonstrate a revulsion to insect consumption. You have_ sprays.

 _"And you thought you'd sneak them in now?"_ Lori shouted.

 _Babomco are bred in sanitary conditions. You will not get sick._

 _"Except maybe for psychological reasons,"_ Roy joked.

Lucky for her, Pabyeba had made some abgigta without any bugs in them. Lori ate two of them, then suddenly lurched over the table, clutching the side of her neck.

"Oh come on," Roy chided. _"_ There are no bugs in that one! _Don't be so dramatic!"_

But Norenio asked, "What's wrong?"

"I feel like I'm holding on to a running lawnmower. My whole body is vibrating."

"You take _theater_ in school?" Roy asked. _"You seem good at it."_

Norenio's tail snapped in annoyance. ". _..Lori._ Does it feel _tickling_ much? Like you are _musical?_ "

My girlfriend rubbed her neck. "Why? What's going on?"

Roy smacked himself in the head. " _Oh that's right!_ God, it's probably _your new friend, wondering why you're not at work!"_

He took out his communication device, tapped it against Lori's neck, then pushed some buttons.

We humans stared at the screen. Indeed, it was the purple garbed jewelry seller, Yatgibi.

"We're on our way," Roy said. "Go easy on that vibrating thing. I think you scared her."

"Hatchling _loqogga_ ," Yatgibi scoffed. "I do not like to be disappointed."

"Don't worry. We'll be there." Roy slapped Lori on the back. "C'mon. Time to do your Quarjabbe."

The fun thing would have been to let Lori go off and do... _whatever_ while ET introduced me to the neighbors, but it's a boyfriend's job to do several things that are not fun with his girlfriend...like _shopping_ , or watching soap operas. _Michael_ , for example, had started watching _All My Children_ and _Dallas_ because of his girlfriend. "You know it's love when you start enjoying it," he told me. "Well, _if she appreciates it._ "

Okay, so not completely sage advice, but enough to tell me that I'd be in the doghouse if I _didn't_ accompany Lori to this... _Quarjabbe._

Gertie, of course, was scared to be alone, even for a short time, so she also came with. _And Norenio_ , to keep us out of trouble, I guess.

In our absence, Tolmina and Rilquza had gone off to some research center, promising to be back later. ET had egg warming duty. He and Meazquad wished us good luck, and they'd see us at dinner.

Pabyeba, though, having done her share of brooding, volunteered to accompany us. That, and Charlie, obviously.

"We probably could have just stopped at a cafe," Lori said as we boarded the flying contraption again. "We going to the market, aren't we?"

Roy pushed some buttons on the console. "Not exactly. _The guy has a factory._ "

"Elliott," Norenio said. "Do you ride horses?"

"No?"

"You did not have any?"

"No."

"Where did they all go? I have seen... _movies_ , and they are everywhere."

I told her about farms.

"Oh. Did you at least have a _dinosaur?_ "

Roy explained to her about the creatures being extinct.

"Why are there so many on the recordings?"

"It's called _special effects._ It's a _trick._ "

"That is disappointing."

For a few minutes, we didn't talk, we just stared at each other, sighed, watched the trees pass by the windows. Roy kept whistling bars from Foreigner's _Blue Morning, Blue Day_.

"What are you humming?" Lori asked.

Roy just shrugged. "Dunno. For some reason it's been stuck in my head all day."

We silently stared out the windows again.

 _I am curious,_ Pabyeba said to Lori. _Why did you take without providing payment? What would motivate you to do such a thing? Were you in desperate need for a Ridvucha?_

Lori responded with sarcasm. "Yeah. _I was hungry and it looked delicious._ "

Sarcasm does not translate well into other languages. Pabyeba looked confused.

"Okay, _so it looked pretty and I wanted it, and nobody was around."_

The alien didn't look any less bewildered. _It did not belong to you without the exchanging of goods and services._

 _"I know. I thought I could get away with it."_

 _Would not the object remind you always of your dishonest act?_

 _"Please don't preach to me. I'm already being punished enough."_

 _I am only asking you a question._

 _"Actually, that makes it worse."_

 _Why?_

"Humans sometimes have _mental bad things_ ," Roy attempted. "They sometimes _need others to help them not do certain things. The Quarjabbe will help."_

It wasn't the greatest explanation, but ET's mate took this as a wise saying, asking nothing more about the subject.

"Pabyeba," my sister said. "How did you first meet ET...Vorxora? Were you always friends? How did you fall in love?"

The Qulpari smiled. _As per tradition, I encamped at the shore of the Zaluxfa until an appropriate mate found me._

Gertie's eyes got really big. "You just... _sat in one place and waited? That's all_?"

Pabyeba looked genuinely puzzled. _I do not understand. It is how it is always done. It is very efficient. Qulpari encamp together at Zaluxfa until they find two mates to complete the Sogwuba. Some wait a long time, but no one encamps or leaves alone. We share food, live closely together. Also, we have a day called Nisweku where no one is allowed to stay at the Zaluxfa until the unchosen Qulpari have partners._

"And what if there's only one left?" I asked.

 _A lottery would be taken among the single Qulpari, and two would be sent to pair with that individual._

"What if nobody gets selected?"

 _That is not possible. All unmated Qulpari are eager to volunteer on the day of Nisweku, those turned away from the shores get added to the lottery._

Lori furrowed her brow. "What about the ones that don't win? It sounds like a lot of your guys end up alone."

 _They can always go to Zaluxfa on the next day._

"Sounds like someone ends up with all the uglies."

Pabyeba looked even more puzzled. "What is ugly?"

My girlfriend laughed. "Um, _not pretty?_ "

"I...do not understand."

"Seriously? _Don't tell me you don't know what ugly is._ That's ridiculous."

The female didn't seem to agree with that statement.

 _"When someone looks undesirable to you. As a mate."_

 _Why would I judge a mate on their visual appearance? A Narluhar looks just as aesthetically pleasing as a Boczura, but they are different animals, ones that must be accepted on their own terms. A painting will be just as wonderful containing a Birotodi as it would a Huxajad. What is in a Qulpari mind, that is what we base judgments upon._

"So there's ugly Qulpari minds?"

She shrugged. I _would not mate with some for that reason._

"By that same token, _someone_ would have to be left alone."

Pabyeba shook her head. _We have_ counselors. _Some must go on the journey of Moxloqok in order to correct their problems. Sometimes they find a mate on the journey._

"Do _people_ go there sometimes?" Gertie asked. _"Humans?"_

Pabyeba chuckled. _I have not heard of this ever happening. I'm afraid, if you went, your Sogwuba would not come for a long long time. Not because you are `ugly', as your friend described it, but because of No Population._

Gertie frowned. _"Oh."_

Yatgibi worked in a hamburger shaped building, attached to the side of an enormous tree, the emerald colored roof and lower half resembling buns, sandwiching rows of large office windows and important looking machines. A secondary `burger' connected to it from a nearby giant sized bough. Smokestacks billowed out clean looking white steam.

It had rods sticking out of it all over, like the adobe structures of Burkina Faso. In fact, the smokestacks greatly resembled the towers on those types of buildings.

We docked at a spindly looking landing structure, crossed a rickety catwalk, descending a narrow staircase that looked and felt unsuitable for a man of Roy's size to be on, especially with its child height hand rails. "At least I'm climbing this thing sober," he said in a nervous whisper to himself. We _were_ a skyscraper's height off the ground.

Norenio smiled, curled her tail around the railing, reassuringly placed his hand on the prehensile appendage.

We had to creep single file down the catwalk at the bottom to go around a group of Qulpari that seemed to be leaving for home, or Happy Hour or something. They muttered to each other about us, one of them cracking a joke.

We knocked on a large door on the `lid' of the burger, and it slid open, revealing the factory.

It wasn't the biggest operation. Only about four Qulpari ran the place, one remotely directing flying robotic machines to carry ores to a processing machine, another doing complicated circuitry work with his telekinetic ability, the two others using various tools to decorate objects. A machine churned out shiny jewelry, each one different, like they were using a computer to 'print out' things in 3D.

Yatgibi may have belonged to an 'enlightened' alien race that seemed soft on crime, but he wasn't stupid. When he saw us arrive, he led us down a tunnel to the other 'burger', away from all the shiny things.

It was a wood shop, offering wooden jewelry and furniture of various kinds, with the exception of chairs, of course.

The layout, although mostly the same as the place we left, had some features not present in the other. Only one alien staffed the area. This, it seemed, had been the workplace of those Qulpari who had gone off to happy hour, abandoned, I guessed, because we were the 'relief help.'

The bulk of their raw material had been sourced from driftwood, basically, fallen logs, that kind of stuff. We watched as the Qulpari Craftsman used his power to restore aged, brittle and sometimes rotten wood to stronger, more durable stuff, at times snapping his tongue out, frog-like, to devour insects infesting the bark. In addition to using his power, he used normal looking chiseling tools, and lasers and such to carve into the wood. He also cultivated plants from seedlings and _grew them into various works of art._

Lori's Quarjabbe didn't actually involve that stuff. While Yatgibi's guy had been busy decorating his fine jewelry, we'd heard _bellowing_ down below. Once we'd been led downstairs, we discovered the task to be milking a big monster that looked like a hybrid between a yak and a cockroach.

Yatgibi had one of his employees demonstrate the task. Lori shuddered when she saw the alien squeezing something resembling antifreeze from the thing's 'udders'. " _Eew! Must everything on this planet be so gross?_ " And she wouldn't do the job.

I sighed, knelt down next to the beast, did a couple practice wrings.

 _Stop,_ Yatgibi scolded. _What are you doing? This is the thief's Quarjabbe to perform. Why are you doing its job?_

"Because I love her," I answered.

Yatgibi frowned. _I understand, but that is not Quarjabbe. It must do its own Quarjabbe._

My ear slug conveyed the word with the implication of _penance_. I gave Lori an apologetic look. _"I tried."_

Lori didn't look happy, but what could I do? Shuddering more, she grabbed the udders with limp hands, barely touching the teats until the Qulpari scolded her into putting forth an effort. _"Ugh! It's all slimy and hairy!"_

 _"Think of it as a growth opportunity,"_ Roy said.

Lori milked the creature. "Bet you wouldn't be saying that if _you_ had to do this!"

He put his hands on his hips. " _Yeah?_ Well go ask Zugkiza at the Orburot stall about that! I had to milk _five_ Boczura every day for an _entire month_ before I got established here!"

I had to admit, Roy _did_ seem... _unsurprised_ by the task before us, like he'd done it lots of times.

Lori squeezed out more green glop. "I don't get it. Why don't they use a machine? _Like the things at the State Fair?"_

"Milking machines?" Roy smirked. " _They do_. Some just like it done their own way, just like hobbyists make and bottle their own wine. Some claim it tastes better."

 _"Lucky for me,"_ Lori groaned.

"Do you like Oxnizjel?" Norenio asked as she stood watching my girlfriend milk the giant bug.

Lori glanced at me uncomfortably. "Uh, _I dunno_." She looked away, acting like she were becoming engrossed in the work. "Anyways, he's not human."

 _"That did not stop Roy Neary."_

That made Lori shudder a little. She looked back up at me, smiled a little. To Norenio, she said, "Um...no, _that's okay_. What you guys are doing is a little too weird for me."

Yatgibi led me to a gardening station, a mini-nursery with plant lights and lots of little sprouts of various kinds, none of them terrestrial, instructing me to tend the flora.

 _I know._ The gardening thing was getting a little old for me too. I mean, _ET_ was into it, _but if that's all you're doing all week.._.

I started out planting and pruning, ordinary stuff, but then _the guy stuck his hands in the dirt and made it glow_.

Like something under time lapse photography, the sprouts around his fingers _moved_ , growing at a rapid pace, expanding, unfurling, _developing blooms_.

"Now you," he said.

I looked at him like he were crazy. "I can't. I'm human."

He didn't seem to understand. Pabyeba waddled up to him, tried to explain the situation, but she also mentioned that I had certain _gifts_.

The Qulpari gestured to a box of dirt with some small sprouts, repeating, " _Now you._ "

I rolled my eyes, deciding to at least _humor_ him.

I stick my hands in the soil, but didn't know what else to do. "You're asking the wrong person. I'm just a kid."

"I think you can do it," Gertie said. "ET _did_ say you had different powers."

 _"I healed Michael,_ " I said. "I think that's probably what he meant. _Not this._ "

"How do you know unless you try?"

I glared at her. _"What does it look like I'm doing?"_

"What are you thinking of? Maybe you're thinking wrong."

 _"What do you want me to do, think happy thoughts or something?"_

I said it too forcefully. My sister looked like she'd been slapped. Her bottom lip trembled. "I don't know. I'm just trying to help."

I sighed. "I'm sorry, Gertie. I'm just frustrated, that's all."

"Colzest made us talk to plants. Maybe _that's_ how you do it."

Feeling foolish, I leaned in close to the plant and said, _"Grow."_

Nothing happened.

"Don't feel bad," Roy said. _"I don't have magic plant powers either."_

Lori, still busily milking, chuntered, "Elliott can glow in the dark and make things fly. I'm sure if you give him the proper motivation, he can do anything."

Her statement made me feel warm all over. "Thanks, but before it was self defense."

"It wasn't when you were healing Michael," Gertie said.

 _"I was afraid for him."_

My sister smiled. "You also _love him_. _Maybe if Lori kisses you..._ "

I could feel Lori's eyes on me. _I was blushing._ "Gertie, I-"

I saw a flash, then the plant box exploded, dirt flying everywhere.

When the dust settled, I saw that the sprout had grown to a spiky cactus thing the size of a basketball, covered in `buttons' and multicolored flowers.

But that wasn't the strangest part.

This plant had grown _roots_. Like a _tree_... _And they had blown a hole through the floor_.


	27. Chapter 27: Pomegranates

"What did you do!" Lori exclaimed, staring at the damage.

Instead of looking excited or amazed, Roy only seemed... _annoyed._ "Are you guys _trying_ to create indentured servitude here? _Because I don't think this will help your bill.._."

Yatgibi peered around the plant boxes, stared at me with an unreadable expression. Then he said, _more_. I guess Qulpari are more accepting of property damage if it has a purpose.

Upon seeing my amazing accomplishment, Pabyeba clapped appreciatively.

The noises stirred Colzest from his slumber. When he took a look at my work, his eyes widened. _It would have been nice if you could have demonstrated this talent on the moon!_

"Sorry. I don't make a habit of growing... _giant beanstalks_ out of things."

Roy was gawking. "Wish I'd been able to play baseball _here_ when I was a kid. Break a window and they probably would have given me a medal!"

I stuck my hands in the dirt next to the plant I'd 'enhanced', prepared to repeat the performance.

 _No. Outside,_ Yatgibi said to me. _Come with me._

I did, of course.

Lori tried to come with, but just got scolded and sent back to the milking stool.

The lower floor of the factory resembled a barn, mainly because they owned three Boczura. Stalls, some sort of exotic hay, feeding and water troughs. It had windows, but they appeared to be reinforced, and had something like chicken wire running through them. You'd think it would be a dirty smelly place, infested with bugs, but the Qulparis' botanical projects demanded a lot of fertilizer, so the whitish mounds of what looked like oversized goose pellets got scooped up and stirred into potting soil the moment they hit the floor. Yatgibi mentioned that Lori would have to do some of that once she had filled enough buckets with Orburot, which didn't exactly motivate her to work.

"Uh oh," Roy called after me. " _Now you've done it!_ I bet you've got a lifetime of crop growing ahead of you, kid!"

Throughout this time, Charlie had been fidgety, but mostly stayed out of trouble, perching on the Boczura, on Lori's back and shoulders until she shooed him away, and on my sister, but at this point, he became a nuisance, taking a drink from Lori's bucket, and knocking it over when she once again repelled it.

As all the fluid she so laboriously milked spilled on the straw covered flooring, Lori shook her fist at him. "Charlie you creep!...Gertie, take your stupid pet out of here before I kill him again! I'm _this close_ to wringing his neck!"

Gertie scolded the creature. "Say you're sorry."

Charlie replied by nuzzling her and making amused noises.

My sister wagged a finger at him. "Bad! Bad alien!"

Charlie responded by licking her in the face.

Lori blew a raspberry, righting the bucket to start the milking process all over again.

The Boczura bellowed in protest.

"Hey! _It's not_ my _fault!_ "

The monster growled like a dog.

"Look. It's not my idea. Personally, I wouldn't even put this crap in a car engine!"

The monster didn't react, it just moved, and she had to scoot over to continue milking.

"Be careful," Roy said. "If it lifts its tail, I'd get back a couple feet. You'll thank me later."

Norenio put an arm around him, resting her head on his shoulder as she watched Lori work. "Is this what it's like on your world? Being a father?"

He frowned. " _Sort of._ Generally a situation like this would end with me paying a fine or going to jail. And _lawyers._ Be glad you don't know about _those_."

Yatgibi led me out a hatch, and up a ramp to an open air deck overlooking the jungles of Jufuceri.

We stood more than a skyscrapers height above the ground. The platform held a planting station and a weird decorative potted tree resembling a morel mushroom. A second ramp led further upwards, to a giant almond shaped wooden door, covered in arcane symbols. A cold chill ran down my back just looking at that door.

As my sister, Charlie and Norenio joined me on the deck, I took a look over the railing.

Below I could see a vast lake, connected to a river and a waterfall. Large insect like machines stood in the water, glowing in different colors as the liquid lapped beneath them.

Norenio pointed to the strange objects. "They are multidirectional hydroelectric plants. Roy Neary tells me your people only build _dam-turbines_ that go _one way_. Ours exploit all water motion."

"Neat."

Yatgibi directed me to the plant boxes, but the moment I had my hands in the soil, his 'employee' came out, pulling me away from there.

The two aliens got into an argument, something about how I'd destroy the floor.

As I moved my ear slug to my other ear, I heard them talking about doing the plant growing in the 'safe room' and that it had reinforced flooring. Something about pomegranates and chemicals. His associate argued that I and my companions couldn't be trusted in there, and they could always fix the deck.

Yatgibi disagreed, saying something about how everything was well hidden.

The other alien looked skeptical. _I will hold you personally responsible for your decision._ With that, he walked onto a plank at the end of the deck and jumped off.

I gasped, staring over the rail in horror.

I was somewhat relieved to discover the alien hadn't committed suicide. When I looked down, I saw that his robe had popped open like a hang glider, and he was drifting safely onto a platform on an adjacent tree.

Gertie, apparently thinking the same thing, joined me at the rail. I pointed.

"Oh. He's got a flying squirrel suit."

Chuckling, Norenio tugged a ring on my costume, and a similar glider cape poofed out from under my armpit.

A shudder ran through me. "Why do I have this on my clothing? _Did you actually expect me to_... _do that_ sometime?"

She shrugged. " _Eventually._ "

"I'd... _like to practice closer to the ground._ "

Norenio giggled. "You do not have to _shuba_ today."

 _Come with me,_ Yatgibi said to me, gesturing to a down ramp.

I followed the Qulpari into a vast chamber that reminded me of a warehouse, big sealed metal containers all over the place, filled with I don't know what, maybe the stuff they made upstairs? Closed security doors led to...I'm not sure. I saw no pomegranates whatsoever. _Or plants_ , for that matter.

Sometimes my ear slug will translate things in my mind that sound the same but mean something different. I usually got the gist of the idea, but not this time.

Yatgibi told me to wait there for a moment.

"Hey," I said. "What are we doing here?"

Instead of answering, he waddled out the main gate, practically smashing my sister in the door as he telekinetically closed it on his way upstairs.

Once the door catch clamped shut with its loud clanking noise, it got so dark I couldn't see my hand in front of my face.

"Elliott!" My sister cried. "Where are you? I'm scared!"

"Over here," I called.

"I can't see you."

I don't always glow for romantic reasons. This time, compassionate feelings about my sister, and worries about her getting injured in the dark, caused my chest to illuminate. I opened the front of my outfit a little, and saw a glowing shape running up to me.

Small arms wrapped around me. "What is this place? Why did they lock us in?"

"I... don't know. I thought they just didn't want me to blow up the floor. I don't even see the pomegranates they were talking about."

My sister stiffened. "Why would they store grenades in here?"

I shivered. " _Grenades?_ What makes you think they have any of those?"

" _Isn't that what you said?_ "

The words 'grenade' and 'grenadine' come from the pomegranate. It's French. Somehow my brain didn't immediately make the connection, but my sister's ear slug translated what I said into a logical, but much more disturbing word.

"...You think they're going to blow us up?" Gertie asked.

I swallowed. "I hope not... honestly, I'm not sure I want to know _what_ they intend to blow up."

On Earth, terrorism seemed like a far away threat, mostly limited to maybe one isolated incident at an airport or Olympic stadium. A nuclear attack by the Russians actually seemed more real. For this reason, I decided to play it safe and wait for actual _evidence_ that Yatgibi actually possessed weapons before flying off the handle making accusations.

"Wait, Gertie. I may have misheard them. They could have been talking about something else, maybe an alien thing we're not familiar with, like a Boczura."

"So you think they might not blow us up."

I absently rubbed her head. "I don't know. I kinda think they'd be wasting my newfound talent. Plus _I didn't actually see...any weapons...or fruit_."

"I hope you're right."

I thought again about how the factory owners had talked in conspiratorial tones. It wasn't something I expected legitimate business owners to do, but I thought that maybe they could have had trade secrets they didn't want to leak out or something. I mean, people _do_ put patents on chemicals, and sometimes argue about things like acceptable percentages of insects and rat feces in food products. "I hope so too."

After a few tense moments and a couple whispered prayers, the big door came back open, an assistant levitating lighting equipment and plant boxes into the room.

When Norenio joined us, Gertie shot me a questioning look.

I shook my head, guessing she intended to go blabbing about the grenades in front of suspicious individuals, in a room that could possibly be filled with explosives.

As the aliens set their plant boxes up on stands, I considered running away. Proof or no proof, these guys were suspicious, possibly terrorists of some sort.

As much as I wanted to, I couldn't. Lori was legally bound to serve her Quarjabbe. Who knew what happened to people that skipped out on their sentencing?

I decided to humor them, just so we could get through this 'public service' quicker.

Casting Gertie a nervous glance, I stuck my hands into the soil and tried to use my powers again, but my emotions were all tangled up in knots.

Although I had no proof of them owning weapons, the idea of these 'peaceful' aliens having them unsettled me, made me less efficient at my task.

Another fearful question compiled this worry: What would happen to me if I failed?

More importantly, what would happen to Lori and my sister?

Sometimes the fear of failure is what causes you to fail the most. And, of course, Lori wasn't there.

 _What is wrong?_ Yatgibi growled. _Must you always Grunspeke in places with weak flooring?_

Norenio, who had joined us at this point, soothed the Qulpari's temper by saying, "He is only a hatchling. He has not manifested these powers before. We must use care if we wish him to manifest them again."

Yatgibi crossed his arms. _Then perhaps_ you _should use care and coax this hatchling to make himself useful!_

" _What of that_ gaspumil _he made? Is_ that _not useful?"_

 _I only wish for him to do it again._ Norenio gave me an expectant look.

I locked eyes with my sister, posing a silent question I knew she'd figure out without me saying anything.

" _Do it, Elliott._ _They're just plants."_

Sighing, I gave her a grateful nod, focused the task more earnestly.

I still was distracted. Nothing happened. "It's just no use. Lori's not here."

"What were you thinking of when you did it last time?" Gertie asked. "Maybe if you just kinda think the same thing..."

I tried. I really did. But it was like I had writers block or something.

" _I'm here,_ " my sister said. " _Doesn't that count for something?_ "

I smiled, started thinking about how she was disappointed, maybe a little heartbroken, judging by the facial expression, like I didn't care about her. _I wanted to impress her, make her not sad._

Still, it took awhile before something happened. I'd just about given up. "It's just no use. I think it's the absence of natural light-"

But then, as I'm saying this, my hands started glowing.

This time, it wasn't nearly as cannon like. The plant came lumbering in its growth like a groggy giant roused from slumber, sluggish but powerful as it swelled out of the confines of its container.

The lumbering giant plant reminded me of something from Jack and the Beanstalk, but purple, with a red pumpkin-like `blossom' at the to, as if a bell pepper and a Jack-O-Lantern had a baby. The floor remained unmarred.

Gertie clapped and grinned at me, which made me feel good. _"See? I knew you could do it."_

It was then that I noticed my nose was running. When I wiped it, I discovered it to be blood.

Yatgibi wasn't nearly as impressed as I thought he'd be. Instead, I felt like I had suddenly become his cash cow, something to be used, like the girl in the Rumpelstiltskin tale.

He pointed to the plant at the end of the box, one not displaced by the first plant, instructing me to repeat the performance.

I actually _made_ an honest attempt, but I got a headache and had to stop. My hands were trembling, my nose dripping blood. I sat down, rubbing my forehead.

 _What is wrong!_ Yatgibi demanded. _Why did you stop?_

"I can't do it," I moaned. _"That last one took a lot out of me."_

Yatgibistared at me like he doubted my words, but I just rubbed my forehead and shook my head no.

With an impatient noise, he pointed to my sister. "Can your mate Grunspeke in your place?"

I reddened. _"She's not my mate. She's my sister."_

He didn't care. _Can she do the task?_

"I'll try," Gertie said.

She stuck her hands in the dirt, furrowing her brow in concentration.

After ten minutes of intense focus, she only managed a feeble imitation of what Yatgibi's assistant could already do.

Yatgibi rolled his eyes. _I see that you need rest._ We will try again tomorrow. _I suppose we will make a fair profit from what you already grew._ That's as close to a thank you that I was going to get.

Yatgibi led me back out to the deck, but instead of rejoining Lori in the barn, he led me up to that creepy looking door on the side of the tree.

The almond shaped door was massive, formed rather than carved from the surrounding wood, its frame like a pair of gigantic swollen lips - like a bough had broken off there. Heavy wooden vines grew across the part that resembled hinges, and what appeared to be a set of double doors. He asked me to open it.

"I don't get it," I said. "If I use my power, wouldn't it make the thing close more?"

 _I do not know,_ Yatgibi admitted. _But I suspect there is a way to make the impediments wither away._

I asked about Colzest and Pabyeba. I wanted to get some advice from them. Yatgibi said they were inside, and I could speak to them as soon as I made the attempt to help with this.

I still didn't like the idea he proposed. If caring, and positive emotions made things grow, what kind of horrible thoughts would be required to make something wither? And what would ET think of me doing such a thing?

I frowned. "I...don't think I can do that."

 _Try._

I glanced at my sister.

She frowned, eyes seeming to say `Don't.'

I looked to Norenio, but she didn't seem to reflect our unease, acting like the door, and my task, were nothing particularly unusual.

I turned away, thought about it for a moment.

Coming to a decision, I placed my hands on the bark.

 _I'd humor them,_ but not in the way they want.

I thought about Lori and Gertie, ignoring nosebleeds and headaches as my hands began to glow.

As expected the door didn't wither. Instead, it tightened more securely, _and even sprouted leaves and flowers_.

 _Mudo!_ Yatgibi yelled. _No! Stop!_

And then he pushed me away, placing his own hands on the bark.

A crimson light glowed from his fingers, and all my pretty work shriveled, browned and fell away like we'd just entered fall.

 _Change thoughts!_ he snarled. _Wither!_

I took a deep breath. "No."

For nearly an entire minute, the Qulpari glared at me in silence, but then something terrible _calmed_ within him.

 _If you open this door, I will release your mate from Quarjabbe, and will consider all debts paid._


	28. Chapter 28: Sovirox

There wasn't anything inherently wrong with opening the side of a tree. After all, I really didn't know what was in there, and I _was_ a little curious. Although the door looked really scary, the only thing telling me it was a bad idea was a vague feeling in my gut, my `boss's' suspicious behavior... _and_ the idea of using a power that _withers things_.

Still, I answered, "I...I think I need to... _go home and ask Vorxora about this first_."

 _I don't see why that is necessary,_ Yatgibi replied. _We own this property. We only wish to_ expand our operation _by opening this sealed storage area._ He must have noticed my skeptical glance, for then he added, _Fine. I will let you in on a secret, just between you and a few of us at the company. We have recently uncovered_ maps indicating a hidden treasure _locked away inside this tree. A_ sonar survey _of the area confirms these suspicions. I'd be willing to cut you in for a percentage if you would only wither away this section of the tree._

The idea did appeal to me, but..."I've never known Vorxora or his friends to wither _anything._ The only time I've seen a plant die around him was when he himself was dying. It... _doesn't feel right._ "

 _Everyone has their own specialty,_ Yatgibi said with a dismissive wave. _Without the mastery over nature , our people would have never developed space flight technology. You do not strike me as the primitive sort that would worship nature gods._

"No, " I stammered. "But-"

 _The tree will not be harmed, no more than, say, a ceqgezi burrowing into its bark for a nest would harm it. All buildings will remain safely intact. I only ask you to wither this small section._

"Don't do it," Gertie warned. "I don't trust them."

 _You worry about nothing._ Yatgibi poked me with his long slimy frog fingers. _I bet you can't even do it. In fact, here's a wager: if you can wither even the smallest portion of this door, I will decrease your mate's Quarjabbe by one day._

Gertie shook her head.

I gave the others a questioning look.

Charlie just smiled stupidly at me. Norenio furrowed her brow like she knew something, but it seemed she didn't know enough, for she said nothing. Likewise, Pabyeba, who had come out to check on me, appeared to be no wiser. Either that, or they didn't believe I could wither things either.

 _Why fret about something you are incapable of? I don't even know if you can do it._ I am only asking you to try.Prove to me _that your worries are justified. I will allow your mate to leave early today,_ if you even make the attempt. _Try._

" _Elliott.._." Gertie said.

"He's right. I don't even know if I can do it. We might be worrying about nothing."

Gertie didn't look so sure. "I don't like this." She trembled. "If it works, don't do it anymore."

Yatgibi chuckled a little, but made no comment.

I placed my hands on the tree. "So... what do I do?"

 _Obviously, whatever you did to grow the plants, but the exact opposite._

I swallowed. "So... _think about the exact opposite of love?_ "

Gertie's face was now _really saying_ 'Don't do it'

 _If love is what grew those other plants,_ said Yatgibi. _Then yes...I believe that_ would _be appropriate_.

Again, I didn't believe I could actually do it, so I tried.

Charlie flew up and perched on my shoulder, watching me make the attempt.

It's a lot easier to find something to hate than it is to love. The resentments bubbled to the surface of my mind to simmer. Annoying unlikable Yatgibi, who stood right next to me, for example. I resented being forced into his service, and familiarity breeds contempt. Then there were ET's courts, and _Oxnizjel_ , whom I hadn't seen, _making moves on my girlfriend._ And _Jimmy._ As I thought about these things, my hands, to my surprise, _did_ begin to glow red a little, but it was like a light bulb at the end of a hand cranked electrical generator. Weak, fading out the moment I noticed it. My emotions were _tangled._ I didn't completely hate anyone.

Plus Charlie kept nuzzling me and making cute noises, distracting me from the task at hand.

 _Perhaps I can help_ , Yatgibi said. _What were you thinking about just now?_

I probably shouldn't have told him anything, but it felt good to get it off my chest.

 _You are right to be concerned about your mate._ _I would be worried too_...are you positively certain that she loves you?

"I..." I stammered.

" _Elliott_ ," Gertie said. " _Don't listen. He's just trying to-"_

 _How old do creatures of your species need to be to understand these matters?_

"She _is_ young," I admitted.

 _"Elliott!"_

 _And the..._ boy _that attacked you at the..._ school _..._

"It's not his fault. He _cried_ right in front of me. _His dad-"_

 _Don't make excuses for your rival. If you were on your own world,_ he _would be_...Lori's mate.

He had a point.

A sick feeling grew in my stomach. My hands, once spread and relaxed on the bark, now clenched, nails digging into the wood.

 _Jimmy,_ I thought, the hate building. I kept seeing Lori kissing him, Lori giving him _that face_. She _would_ abandon me if she found another human boy. I'm just 'sloppy seconds', something for her to use until she found someone better.

And then there was _Charlie_ , being annoying with his noise and rubbing up against me, distracting me from my work.

My hands glowed a fiery crimson. I felt a dark energy growing inside me, the same one that inspired dad to swear at bolts while working on his truck. I never understood how telling God to damn something could make it work better, but it seemed to help dad loosen a sixteen inch drain pipe under the sink, and that energy was now working in _me._

Charlie let out a frightened dog whimper and flew off into the trees.

"Charlie!" My sister cried. I'd later find out that, in her attempts to bring Charlie back, she had come within inches of falling off the tree, Norenio saving her at the last minute. I ended up feeling _really bad_ when I discovered _that_.

Something made a loud crack.

Surprised, I looked up just in time to see a single thin vine blacken and fall off the door.

I did it. I actually succeeded in withering something. It hadn't even caused a headache or a nosebleed. In fact, it felt... _natural._

That being said, my accomplishment didn't make me feel happy. It just caused a... _cold_ numbing sensation to grow in the pit of my stomach.

 _Congratulations_ , said Yatgibi. _You and your mate may go home and rest. You've earned it._

I did not rejoice, the terribleness of my act cheapened this minor victory.

Gertie nervously crept up to me and whispered, "Never do that again."

Instead of agreeing, I found myself replying, " _I know._ " It made me feel even worse.

Charlie rejoined us, which cheered my sister a little, but, notably, he seemed to be avoiding me, and would continue to avoid me for a long time afterwards.

We followed Yatgibi back into the factory, our silence glum, almost funerary. I _myself_ felt like something inside me had died, perhaps the others had sensed it too.

We found Lori shoveling up giant insect manure inside the barn. Yatgibi muttered something to his co-workers, then told Lori, _Your work today has been_ adequate. _You are free to go home and rest until tomorrow._

Instead of being happy, Lori cried, " _Adequate!_ I do all this work and all you can say is ` _It's adequate_?' I have half a mind to dump that bucket of green crap I milked all over your ugly little alien head!"

 _"Lori,"_ I said. " _Cool it_. He's got an idea that might allow us to get out of this early."

"I don't like it," said Gertie. "I think you're better off working normally."

Lori's face, already flushed with anger, got redder. " _You_ wouldn't be saying that if _you_ had to shovel poop and milk these things!"

"Yes I would," she said quietly. "At least then I wouldn't have to hate people."

Lori frowned at me. "What's she talking about?"

"Nothing," I answered. "She doesn't know what she's saying."

My sister turned red. " _Yes I do! He learned how to wither a tree by hating Jimmy!_ "

My girlfriend paled. " _What?_ "

"It's nothing," I said. " _It's just a mental thing_ , to control the power."

Instead of accepting my explanation, she said, " _You're a jerk, Elliott._ "

I felt like I'd been slapped. "Lori!"

Roy had been idly playing with his handheld computer all this time. "Isn't it weird that they don't even use tape to record their programs and data?" he muttered. Noticing us, he got up from the stool he'd been occupying. "Well, it sounds like you guys are dismissed for the day. Let's go."

My girlfriend expressed reluctance, scowling at me. "If I stay longer, can I end this... _thing_ earlier?"

Yatgibi replied that it didn't work that way. In response, she wiped manure on his robe.

The alien growled in annoyance, but seemed to have cultivated a tolerance for personal insult. _Roy_ , however, was outraged. " _Lori_!"

She only sobbed and stomped out of the room.

 _"Gee, thanks, Gertie,"_ I muttered. _"She wouldn't have raised such a stink if you hadn't said anything."_

" _What?_ All I did was tell her the truth!"

Lori hadn't run away. We found her sitting on the ground next to our flying vehicle. I could have sworn I saw her putting out and hiding a cigarette, though I had no idea how she could have been in the possession of any. Roy looked suspicious, but made no comments.

We climbed aboard our 'aircar', facing each other in stony silence as it took off.

I thought the whole ride would be like that, but then my sister said, " _He actually did it._ Whatever he did, he made Charlie run away. I nearly died trying to-"

I felt like I were going to throw up.

I mean, I knew, rationally, that my newfound power didn't cause this brush with death, but the accusation still stung. Plus I was guilty of negligence, if nothing more.

Yet, another part of me resented her, because I suspected she had done this on purpose, to make me stop my experiment. She was going to ruin everything. "Gertie! That wasn't my fault! You should have been more careful!...Norenio..."

 _"She's your sister,"_ Lori said coldly.

 _"I thought you'd appreciate not having to scoop manure and milk those things,"_ I grumbled, half under my breath. _"Guess I thought wrong!"_

She looked indignant. _"What did you say!"_

"Nothing," I grumped. "Forget it." I had a couple more things I wanted to say, but she seemed pissed off enough as it was. We resumed our fuming standoff.

Charlie snuggled close to my sister and fell asleep.

Norenio gave Roy a playful jab. "Roy Neary, why do we not marry? You have told me yourself that some married people are _infertility_."

The man crossed his arms. _"Because I'm technically still married,_ that's why. She ran off with the kids. I never got served the divorce papers."

The female stuck out her tongue, making it divide into three wiggling segments. "That does not sound very deliciousness...Does you mean that recipe is _on_ the divorce papers, or do you _eat_ the divorce papers?"

"It's more like _tennis_. I told you about serving in tennis, didn't I?"

Norenio nodded. _"They must have many good things to eat at tennis games!"_

Roy smacked himself in the face. " _It's not edible._ They just give you a document explaining why you're not married anymore, and the rules about the breakup and the money and the children."

 _"Why did you not just say that?"_

He sighed. I could tell he did, he just wanted to avoid conflict. "I don't know. I just didn't."

"You say `I don't know' a lot when I think you know. Do you not understand your own feelings, or do you really know and not want to tell me?"

Roy slouched in his chair. _"It's personal."_

She scooted up to him. " _We are personal. Very much personal, especially in bed._ Why do you keep secret feelings from me?"

Roy gave me a look that said 'Help me' but then it changed to 'Why am I trying to get help from you?'

"We should get a nennop," Norenio said. "We could make you... _less shy._ "

Roy reacted like she'd just suggested a visit to the dentist. " _That touchy feely crap?_ "

" _I thought you like touchy and feely_ ," she pouted. _"I know I like touchy feely with you..."_

" _I'll think about it._ " His facial expression, though, could be confused with someone _thinking about_ getting one of those long dentist needles stuck in their gums.

"What's a nennop?" Gertie asked.

Roy looked embarrassed. "It's a... _person_...you add to your family. It's like having a _shrink_ living with you, but they're _eunuchs._ "

Gertie had to have _that term_ explained to her too.

Roy was getting red faced. "No-ey babe, do you really want to go through all the trouble and expense of going to the _Pemgurm_ for a nennop when we can't even have children?"

" _Guep!"_ his girlfriend said. "Yes!"

I could tell the man really didn't want this, but felt defeated.

He said nothing, but Norenio understood the look. "We do not have to visit Pemgurm. We have _new friends_. _Vorxora, Pabyeba, Tolmina, Colzest..._ surely one will be happy to be our nennop!"

" _Qulpari?_ " Roy cried incredulously. "You want a Qulpari nennop?"

Norenio shrugged. "I do not _lust want_ Qulpari, we cannot reproduce... _Do_ you _lust want_ Q _ulpari?_ "

Roy visibly shuddered. "Hell no."

"Then Qulpari is perfect. We only have to give ritual of Kedoonk."

"Wait. They have _families_. They're in _groups of three._ We can't just ask one to come live with us!"

"Why not?"

The two stared at Pabyeba.

 _We are brooding,_ she said. _Perhaps after_.

The Abreya was undeterred. " _Colzest and Tolmina came alone._ "

" _Sure. Why not._ " Roy's tone sounded less than thrilled.

"Roy," I said. "Isn't there something in the Christian bible about someone withering a tree?"

" _Wow, that's obscure_! Why are you asking me?" He paused and thought a moment. "That... _does_ kind of sound familiar. I...think... _Jesus got pissed off at a fig tree?_ _Something about mountain moving faith?"_ He shrugged. "I don't know. _Why, got a beef with something you grew?"_

I shook my head. _"Mountain moving faith..."_ I mused.

My sister frowned. _"Just because you can move a mountain doesn't mean you should."_

Our vehicle docked once more in ET's aboveground `neighborhood.' Since some time had passed between lunch and our day of work, dusk had fallen, and we could see _lights_ in the various homes, when the Qulpari weren't outside enjoying the night sky, or lounging around in couches that looked like lotus pods.

One of the buildings clearly appeared to be empty. I asked Pabyeba about it.

 _That belongs to Admasca the Historian. He should be back in a few days. Why?_

"I don't know. It just looked weird with all those other well lit homes."

The moment Pabyeba turned her back, Lori tugged on Admasca's front door. It swung right open.

She gasped, covered her mouth to suppress a giggle, closed it quickly when she noticed Roy looking her way. "Ahem."

Charlie seemed to suspect she was up to no good, for he gave a warning " _Churrrr!"_

I poked Pabyeba on the shoulder. "Are there any burglars on this planet? Have you heard of any at all?"

 _"It is not unheard of..._ "

"They have something like a neighborhood watch." Roy gave Lori a knowing look. _"_ And _devices_ , _like in the market."_

"Qulpari share more than they possess," Norenio added. "Roy Neary says that thievery is not as common here. _They are not as motivated with greed."_

"They still have some," I muttered, remembering Yatgibi's behavior.

"Still... _neighborhood watches._ "

Lori gave me a mischievous look. It seemed her bad mood had evened somewhat.

She came close to me, whispering in my ear. "We deserve to do something fun tonight. Let's sneak out later."

I swallowed, giving her a slight nod.

"You two are _so_ adorable," Roy remarked.

Lori quickly stepped back.

We returned to ET's house and ate dinner. Basically the same thing we had for lunch. Again, we had learned not to turn our nose up at food, so we didn't complain. At least we dined in the company of friends. In addition to seeing Meazquad again, Rilquza and Tolmina had returned to us, and of course ET was always a welcome sight.

Meazquad made Lori a special set of Abgigta that had no insects in it, but she broke down and ate one of the regular ones anyway. "I've handled disgusting things all day. I don't think anything can get much worse."

 _"One of the main reasons I_ insisted _you wash your hands before supper,"_ Roy joked.

"Can I _please_ wear my other outfit now?" Lori said.

Roy frowned. "No."

 _"Did you even_ check _if it was stolen?"_

"It doesn't matter. _You're still grounded._ "

 _"You didn't check."_

The man looked unapologetic. _"I was too busy watching you."_

 _"It is not stolen,_ " said Norenio. "I had Meazquad speak to Oxnizjel. _"_

Roy didn't look happy about that, probably because he still wanted to assert his authority. _"Well thank you for checking that behind my back!"_

A silence fell.

Gertie played _`Invisible Touch'_ on her little boom box for a few moments, but Roy eventually tired of it. _"Okay..."_ he marched over and punched the stop button. "Let me know when you find _The Monster Mash."_

It got quiet again. You would have thought that having ET and other Qulpari around the table would have livened things up, but they were too busy staring at us like bugs in a jar. Once us kids explained a few things about how we spent our day, they had few further questions. Well, other than Meazquad's suggestion of having us visit their learning center and play a sort of Pictionary with their scholars, and me briefly outlining how we could potentially shorten Lori's _`public service'_.

A strange colander-like helmet glowed on a nearby table. Lori set her food aside to play with it.

"I wouldn't touch that if I were you," Roy said. "You know how movies tend to have flashbacks?... _Qulpari films don't_. You get `debriefed' with _actual memories_ that fill you in on the details. I tried Oprerto Mivyoce and haven't been the same since. Earth filmmakers only _think_ they're screwing with your head. _These guys actually do it."_

Lori quickly dropped the headset.

"How did you meet Roy?" Gertie asked the Abreya.

Roy's face flushed red. "I thought _No-ey_ gave you all the sordid details already. There's not much more to tell."

My sister grinned. _"I think there is!_ Tell me, _I want to know!"_

This made him look even more embarrassed. "Look. We were... _just friends.._.We met in the Mavduja market and she was super nice to me, giving me food and clothes and stuff, showing me around the place. We really weren't romantic at first... _at all._ She was just being _friendly_ , you know, curious about my species and planet and stuff. I..." He sighed, shook his head.

Gertie leaned closer. "How'd you... _get romantic_ with her?"

"I...no, _I can't. I won't."_

My sister looked like she were going to cry. _"Tell me!"_

 _"I don't have to tell you anything, kid."_

Now Gertie _was_ really pouting.

Norenio gave her a kindly smile. " _He was drunk._ He said he loved me, he was lonely and he had no one., and he desired me. I did not understand until he kissed me. I admit even then I was _confused_. But then, when we went to my dwelling and familiarized ourselves with each other's anatomies, I became ` _unconfused...'_ "

My sister stared open mouthed at Roy's girlfriend, as if the alien just granted her the secrets of womanhood. I cringed at the thought of how she intended to make use of this knowledge.

"Norenio, _stop. This is not appropriate."_

"Why is it not appropriate, Roy Neary? _She is genuinely curious_. I did not say anything offensive. I only tell her about our ... _unique-relationship_. Just because you are... _embarrassment_ , and... _need a nennop_ to help you _express-feelings-much_ , does not mean it is bad." Roy opened his mouth to reply, but she cut him off. "It is not ` _fox paw'!_ _She ask, I communicate!_ And even if it is _`fox paw', it is only_ `fox paw' _for Roy Neary!"_

 _"No-ey, she's way too young to hear all that._ What is she, like _eight_? On our planet we don't talk about..." I could tell he wanted to use a colloquialism, but had to drop it so she could understand. "... _baby making_ until they're older... _like Elliott's age_ , and _you start noticing their bodies, their behavior change. Kids grow up too damn fast as it is!"_

Norenio looked puzzled. "I...thought...parent was supposed to teach... _child_...to become _good-adult_ , teach _girl-child_ to be _teen-woman_."

"No-ey, baby, that's great, but _let her have her childhood first._ _Unlike your people, she's not going to stay looking that age for ten years!"_

 _"All the more reason to teach, Roy Neary!_ How will she know about _healthy-future-love?_ "

 _"Healthy!"_ Roy laughed. "Is that what-"

The alien looked hurt.

He rubbed his eyes like he'd been processing data for an hour. "Sweetie, can we _please_ change the subject? I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"You are much shyness, Roy Neary. You _need_ a nennop." Norenio turned to face her dining companion. "Colzest, will you be our nennop?"

The Qulpari shuddered like Lurch on _The_ _Addams Family_ , shaking his head.

Since Norenio wasn't taking the initiative to change the subject, Roy took it upon himself. "So...Elliott. _You seem to have made an impression on Yatgibi..._ "

"Yeah," I muttered. _"I guess."_

"How many more of those plants did you grow for them?"

"Just two. I got nosebleeds after that." I hesitated talking about the withering. It didn't feel good.

"There's a _door_ on their tree," Gertie said. "They wanted Elliott to tear it down with his power."

 _"Hence the weird bible question."_ Roy furrowed his brow like he knew something.

I paled. "What? What is it?"

He stared at ET. "Hey... _Vorxora._ You remember that old story about that guy of yours that got imprisoned inside a tree? _Bad guy?_ Strange name, something...starting with an S, like... _Sinestro?_ "

ET's eyes narrowed. "His name was _Sovirox._ He was the most evil Qulpari ever to be born. Indeed, _he and his mates_ were imprisoned in a tree, but that was hundreds of years ago. Even if someone could remember the location of his imprisonment, it's likely all three of them have become skeletons by now."

The moment I heard this, I felt the initial chill I'd been feeling fade somewhat, the temperature returning to the room. "Okay...sounds like it doesn't matter if we open this thing, then. We're just doing a little _archaeological expedition._ This Quarjabbe will be over in no time!"

Roy smirked. _"As long as there isn't a mummy's curse!"_

ET's expression grew grave. _"I would not go near it._ "

I stared at him. "Why? I don't see what harm-"

ET stood up, and for the first time ever, I saw him display actual anger. _"Stay away from it!"_

He returned, trembling, to his floor pillow, looking like a grandmother who had just found out someone made fraudulent purchases on her checking account. " _Stay away from it._ " And then, after a moment's pause, he spoke in a low tone. "Fast solutions are not always the best."

Roy got up from the table, possibly to escape the tension. "I need to go back to my place to get a few things real quick. I'll be back in a few minutes. _No-ey_ , sugar, can you watch the kids so they don't get arrested again?"

Norenio nodded. "Gip'm, _cuculia_."

Roy visibly cringed. "It's _najufe_ , baby. _Najufe._ "

She blushed green. "No! I am _cuculor!_ _Fiancee!_ I spend many time with you, Roy Neary!... _Much time! My family_ say we have _Inseparable Bond!"_

"Norenio! You know how I feel about this!"

"If you do not call me _cuculor_ , I will go!"

"Go then!" Roy cried. "You're _koo-koo!_ "

 _"What about the children? What about them, Roy Neary?"_

"This isn't the first time I've dealt with someone using kids as a weapon."

"You're not being fair."

He sighed in frustration. "Just go. I thought I had left this kind of shit back on earth, but I guess I thought wrong!"

Norenio whimpered. "I can't. The children need us."

Roy's tone softened. " _Then stay._ Be the babysitter. _I'll pay you._ I don't care. I'm not ready." He headed to the door.

 _"I will make you ready,"_ Norenio said. _"We will have our nennop."_

The man rubbed his face and stepped outside, slamming the door behind him.

After supper, ET led us outside, and we got introduced to his neighbors. He had an astronomer friend with a small fancy telescope that had more viewing power than the Palomar Observatory, with infrared, a friend that weaved tapestries in the ultraviolet spectrum, a chef and an architect. I imagined his archaeologist friend would have been fascinated by my little tree project, but this is the Qulpari who had gone on a trip.

Someone brought out musical instruments, and they had a little dance party.

For a few moments, we just had fun and danced with the aliens, but then, as Norenio and ET got distracted talking to the others, Lori grabbed me, dragging me behind one of the huts. Gertie panicked and rushed to join us.

"What?" I whispered.

"Let's not talk here. _That one guy left his front door open. We can go in there._ Quick, before they notice we're gone."

I hesitated. "I..."

"It's now or never, Elliott. If we hang around here, someone will find us, and they'll watch us even more closely than they do now."

I broke into a sweat thinking about the trouble we could get into. "... _You're right. We should get moving._ "

We hadn't gone a step when we noticed Meazquad calling after us. _Where are you hatchlings going?_

"We're just going to... _stargaze at the other end_ ," Lori said. " _It's a very pretty night._ "

" _We're just looking around,_ " I agreed, flushing with shame at the dishonesty. "We're... not going far."

Meazquad accepted this.

Lori took my hand, dragging me to the archaeologist's place.

The building, unwisely, had both a front and rear entrance, neither one locked. Once all three of us and Charlie were in, Lori hurriedly shut the door, pushing a crate across it to keep the aliens out. She did the same for the front door, using a dresser-like furniture item.

The layout was pretty much the same as ET's place, but with some notable differences. For one, it had shelves filled with books, odd sculptures, bones, expensive looking bejeweled gold and silver artifacts. All the rooms were on one side, the other only had windows overlooking the forest.

Lori gazed admiringly at the trophies, snatched up a small idol.

 _"Haven't you learned your lesson?"_ I asked as she pocketed the item.

She sighed, put the item back. "Guys, I want to talk to you about something... _We need to run away_ _from ET and Roy._ If we go somewhere else, we won't have to do that stupid punishment."

I frowned. "Are you serious? _Run away? From ET?_ He's the reason why we came here in the first place!"

" _No_ ," she said. " _You came here because a bunch of government guys wanted to put you in a lab._ "

I couldn't exactly deny that. It _was_ the main reason I had to abandon my family. Still, I said, " _You're wrong, Lori. I_ love _ET_. We can't just go and leave him!"

My sister nodded. " _She just wants to leave because she stole something and has to do_ Quarjabbe _._ "

Charlie made a funny noise, seemingly in agreement, but you could also interpret it as, 'Mmm, this is good mouthwash,' so you couldn't, as a rational person, read that as an intelligent response.

Lori wasn't being rational. " _You stay out of it_ , Charlie! I've had just enough out of you!"

Charlie flew behind my sister's back.

"Look, Lori," I said. " _I'm going to help you._ Yatgibi already told me he'd let us go early if I can open that door...or _crypt_ for him."

" _And you believe him?_ "

I shrugged.

"If he's so impressed with your power, I doubt he's going to just let us walk like that. _Just a hunch._ "

I thought maybe that might be okay, since I'd be his business partner, earning money, but, to be honest, I didn't like the guy any more than she did. "Can't we just _try it_ and see before we think about running away? Maybe get _ET and possibly his...courts_...to _retry the case_ if it doesn't work out?"

Lori sighed. "Okay, fine. But you'd better be right."

"Lori," I said. "Where'd you get the cigarettes?"

She stared at me in horror. "What?"

"I saw you sneaking a cigarette. Where'd you get it from?"

Lori looked visibly nervous. "I...don't know what you're talking about."

"C'mon, you don't need to lie to me! I won't tell anyone. I just don't understand how you got them...or a cigarette lighter. I thought they took everything from us. _Did you steal them from Roy?_ "

She indignantly put her hands on her hips. _"So we're making up stories now?"_

 _"No..."_ I faltered, doubting my own eyes. "I don't know, I mean, _I thought I saw you smoking_. I saw you sitting next to the flying machine, putting something in your mouth, and then you put it away real fast."

Lori rolled her eyes. "There were _twigs_ around the _thing_. _The tree was shedding_. For the record, I didn't put them in my mouth. I got bored and threw them over the side."

I sniffed her, something which annoyed her further. _"Okay okay! I bought a pack from an imaginary cigarette machine! Elliott, don't be an idiot! I have no cigarettes! Did using those special magic powers damage your brain or something?"_

I sighed, giving it up. "I...I don't know, maybe. I guess I was seeing things."

 _"You guess right."_

I locked eyes with her. "Look, I...need to talk to you about something privately. Just you and me. _Alone._ "

Lori rolled _her eyes_. "What's there to talk about? You're _jealous_ , _you hate it when I have other male friends_ , _and now that hate somehow gives you magic powers._ "

"Lori," I stammered. "I..."

"Would _you_ like it if someone told _you_ you couldn't have any other friends?"

" _I never said that!_ "

" _You implied it._ " I sighed in frustration. "You're right. I'm sorry." I wasn't really, I was just saying that to be nice. "I... get it." I glanced at my sister. "Gertie, could you go back to ET? I don't want them suspecting anything."

Gertie shook her head. "No. I don't want you to leave without me."

"Gertie, we're going to leave."

"Promise?" I thought the answer was yes, but Lori's face was saying something else. Of course, she probably wanted to just grab my sister and go, maybe leave me behind with my alien friend while she was at it. "I... promise. _We're just going to talk about some adult things, okay?_ "

"I don't believe you. _I can talk about adult things too!_ "

"Gertie," Lori soothed. "We're not going to abandon you."

 _That_ comment relieved me some. At least she wouldn't go without _me._ " _Yeah, Gertie. Stop being such a baby._ "

" _I'm not a baby!_ " My sister removed the block from the door, stormed off crying.

Lori frowned at me. "You could have been nicer to her."

I reddened. "I'm sorry. I just wanted to talk to you about some... _private stuff_ and didn't want her listening in. Plus, I _kinda do_ think she needs to grow up a little..."

She sighed like she didn't agree. _"You endangered your sister."_

"Don't you think I feel bad enough about that? I was busy trying to end your... _thing_ , and I _couldn't watch her at the same time_ , okay? Besides, _Norenio_ was there. She took care of it."

Lori reluctantly accepted the explanation. "Okay, fine. _So what_ private adult stuff _do you want to talk about?_ "

I suddenly felt hot. "Look. _I love you_ , and I've been acting... _like a jerk_ because I get _jealous_ when you're around other guys. I'm afraid you'd leave me for someone else if you had the chance, and I'd be left alone."

It was her turn to blush. "Elliott, I'd never ' _leave you_ ' leave you... _I'd still be there..."_

I scrunched up my face. " _You know what I meant._ "

"Well," she stammered. "I mean, look. I wouldn't have even run away from home and come with you on this crazy trip if I didn't have feelings for you. _But it's hard_ , you know? With all this _alien business_ , and _me pretending to be your sister,_ it's like we're just ' _good friends_ ' and not-"

I pulled her into my arms and kissed her full on the mouth. _This will show her,_ I thought.

Lori was shocked, but not in a bad way. She closed her eyes, kissed me back.

I paused for a moment. "You taste like cigarettes."

 _"Again with the cigarettes,"_ she groaned. "I told you I have-"

 _"Had._ _Past tense._ You must have gotten rid of them."

 _"As if you know what a cigarett tastes like._ You want to continue making stupid accus-"

I quieted her with my lips.

At first she was okay with it, but as I led her toward the aliens jellyfish bed, and started removing her jumpsuit, she pushed me away, red faced. "Elliott, stop! What are you doing!"

" _I love you!"_

I've never seen her looking so red. "I...I do too, _but I'm not ready for this._ _Not now!_ "

" _When_ are you going to be ready?"

Lori marched to the door. " _Take a cold shower and think about it!_ God, what's gotten into you?"

And then I was alone.


	29. Chapter 29: Boqunze

Note: I've revised that section in the last chapter where they're in the historian's hut. The changes involve dialog about Lori's cigarettes and Elliott endangering his sister. (FanBob FicPants-this is just the additional stuff I messaged you about earlier)

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* * *

I wasn't alone as I thought. Hearing a creak behind me, I turned just in time to see my sister closing the back door. She had been eavesdropping on our whole... _conversation._

I stomped out after her. _"You've been listening in this whole time?"_

Gertie looked ashamed, but also fearful, like I were going to _hit her_ or something. _"I was afraid you were planning to run away without me."_

Charlie popped out from behind her back, giving me a nod. _"Hmmm!"_

I sighed through my nostrils. " _Did_ Lori _see you?_ "

Gertie shook her head. _"I... don't think so_...I won't tell anyone, I promise."

 _"Tell anyone what?"_ Roy stepped out from behind the hut, rucksack slung over his shoulder.

 _"Gertie-"_ I hissed.

My sister's lip trembled. " _Go on,"_ Roy said. _"_ Tell me. _I especially want to know what you were doing sneaking around in mister Admasca's house!"_

Charlie nodded eagerly. I tried to ignore him.

My sister folded under Roy's browbeating, blurting out an entire confession. "Lori wants to run away so she wouldn't have to do the Quarjabbe. We went into Admasca's house to talk about it, then Elliott sent me away so he could make love with Lori and I, I spied on them because I didn't want them to leave me-"

 _"Whoa, whoa, wait!"_ Roy cried. _"He what!"_

The man crossed his arms, seeming to be so angry that he couldn't quite formulate words. After his face had regained its normal color, and he'd done some deep breathing exercises, he finally spoke. "So you were just going to _ditch me_ and run off to God knows where? Was _that_ the plan?"

I shrugged. "I _tried_ to tell her-"

Lori joined us. _"You're not our dad._ I've lived on my own before."

"So you're just gonna continue doing what you were doing before you came here? _Squatting in old abandoned buildings and stealing things?_ Is this what you do with all your problems? _Run away from them?"_

Lori refused to answer that.

"How did you survive all this time? _Did you run away from your parents like that?_ What did they force you to do? _Clean your room_?"

"Shut up," she growled. _"_ You're not my dad."

I could tell the comment didn't set right with him, but he didn't take the bait. _"Why."_

Lori clenched her fists. "Look. I only worked for that Yatgibi guy a day and already I can't stand him. _You expect me to do that again?_ For what, _ten years?_ "

 _"It's only one year_ ," Roy said in forced even tones. _"We worked out a deal._ And based on what I've heard, it might be even shorter, _thanks to boyfriend here_..."

"He's not my-"

I glared at her.

Lori's face flushed. "Okay, _so I'm not saying that he isn't my boyfriend, but..."_

 _"Which brings us to item two..._ part of returning you to your parents as good or better than I found you involves you _not getting pregnant._ How old are you guys anyway? _Twelve?_ "

 _"I told him no,"_ Lori said quietly.

 _"Well good for you!"_ Roy took me aside. "Hey, _I was once your age._ I know how it is. You're just starting to _learn things_ about your body, _you start getting ideas..._ "

My face flushed red with shame and irritation. "She's right, you know. _You're not our dad."_

 _"So what if I'm not!"_ Roy was almost yelling now. _"Is it so wrong to try to teach a kid not to make the same kinds of mistakes I made?"_

Frightened, Charlie swelled like a puffer fish, even producing needles like one.

Roy fell silent, just giving me and Lori disappointed looks. "You know what? _You're right, I'm not your damn father._ You want to go so bad? _Just go._ I don't care anymore. _You try to be nice, try to teach a child to survive in a place they don't belong in_ , and they just spit on you and complain that you're not their dad."

He fumed in silence for a moment. _"So I'm not your dad._ You don't have to be my kids. You can just _go out there, get lost, get arrested a few more times, until you_ really _get punished, and then pop out a couple babies and starve to death for all I care!_ "

With that he angrily marched away.

Charlie deflated himself, nestling on Gertie's shoulder. She petted him.

For a moment I and Lori just exchanged uncomfortable glances.

She rolled her eyes. "C'mon. Let's go."

I swallowed. _"Go?"_

Lori groaned. _"You know what I meant._ Back to the crazy guy."

We returned to ET's hut. I'm pretty sure, if they had locks on their doors, we wouldn't have been able to get in. I found Roy seated at the table, pouring shots of black liquid form what appeared to be a Bogolanfini patterned sake jar. The liquid reminded me of that black gunk that comes out of drain pipes when a plumber snakes them. " _The prodigal children return,_ " he grumbled.

"That stuff looks like motor oil," Lori said. "What's it taste like?"

 _"Yuuum!"_ said Charlie.

Roy took a sip of the glop, rolling it around in his mouth like a wine taster. "It's... _a little hard to describe._ Kinda like... _yams, rice milk and Listerine_. Not quite as good as beer." He paused. "Have you ever contemplated the meaning of Gorbachev's birthmark?"

I shook my head.

He held up his glass. "Said the monkey to the donkey, would you like something to drink? Said the donkey to the monkey, 'I should like a swig of ink!'" he emptied the glass, poured a shot for Norenio.

She took the glass, but only turned it around in her fingers, smiling at him. _"We have a nennop now."_

Roy stared. _"What?"_

" _Tolmina_ has volunteered."

The Qulpari nodded. _I am very excited about this._

The man looked horrified.

"Tolmina, tell him what we discussed."

 _You and Norenio have been together a long time, and have engaged in..._ reproductive activities. _By the terms of your culture, and to honor Norenio's family, I recommend a_ mogza, uslofya _or the human ritual of..._ matrisimineon?

 _"Mat...trim...money,_ " the Abreya prompted.

 _Mattrisimunney._

Roy's face flushed with anger. "Well gee Mr. Castrated live in psychologist, why don't you tell me your opinions about what _I_ should be doing with _my_ relationship! You know what that's called? A _creep_ and a _nag_!"

Charlie swelled like a puffer fish again, dove behind my sister.

Norenio's tail curled toward the Qulpari. "Tolmina can help us."

 _Yes,_ said Tolmina. _I am very helpful._

"Honey, _telling us what to do is not helping._ If there were some way of _making_ me a better person, _that_ I'd call useful! But again, I probably wouldn't be here!"

"A nennop can give _you_ specific advice. There is less... _guess work_ and assumptions. And they are also there to _listen._ "

Tolmina grinned. _I am very specific. I will listen to your concerns and tell you what I think about your guesswork and assumptions._

 _"Shove it up your slimy ass!"_ Roy drank a shot, pointed to us children. "And _you_! What do _you_ have to say for yourselves?"

"We're sorry," I said.

"Sorry," Lori agreed. "You're right."

Roy poured another shot. " _Damn straight_."

 _You should be more..._ respectful, Tolmina said.

"I didn't ask for your opinion." Roy swallowed black crude, turning his attention to me. "You ever felt like your entire life, from start to finish, has been wasted on something unimportant?"

I stared.

"No, I suppose not. Too young...Well, it's like this." His hands formed an imaginary mesa. "You wake up one day with this feeling like you had a destiny to _be something_ , but then you just slept through it or walked away." He downed another shot.

Midlife crisis, I thought. It explains a few things. "I don't think you should be drinking anything that color. Are you trying to poison yourself?"

"I should have died a long time ago, kid. Besides..." He made a sound like he were either experiencing a lurch on a sailing ship, or about to throw up. "Besides, _the color black contains all the other colors."_ He paused. "Or was it white?" He frowned, made an artless hand gesture to dismiss the subject. _"S'one of those colors."_

Roy was swaying like a dog with an inner ear disorder, or a passenger on an invisible boat. He laughed, pulled Norenio close, groped her in a clumsy but lustful manner.

They muttered to each other for a moment, arguing, I guess.

 _"I love you!"_ He cried. _"I'm...so..._ lonely!"

Norenio stared, looking uncomfortable. _"You are drunk."_

 _You have had many boqunze,_ Tolmina agreed.

 _"So what._ Never stopped us before. _"_ Roy made a corkscrewy motion with his finger, poked Norenio's chest. " _You... drank some too._ "

 _"Not as much."_

He whispered things in her ear, something that made her blush green.

They argued in low tones again. Roy fondled her, but she recoiled from him, got away from the table.

"Hey!... _screw you_...bitch!" Roy medicated himself some more.

He suddenly staggered to his feet, moving like a cartoon pirate in an invisible tsunami. _"I've.. got to...let the dog out_."

Lori stared in disbelief. _"He's got an actual dog?"_

 _"He's drunk,"_ I said.

Roy rubbed his face. "My... _Dolcani_. _I have to walk it._ " He stumbled to the door like an unsecured rider on one of those carnival 'rotor rides', flung the door open, did the zombie shuffle onto the walkway outside.

Concerned about his safety, I hurried after him, Norenio following close behind. Lori and Gertie trailed us, out of curiosity more than anything else, I think. And of course Charlie came along.

Roy leaned forward, to the point where I thought he'd fall flat on his face, but he somehow achieved balance, similar to that crazy trick the Tin Man does on the _Wizard of Oz._

Part of the tree platform lacked railings. Roy made a wild zombie shuffle in that direction, coming within inches of pitching over the side, but at the last second righted himself with a woozy smile, half jogging up the walkway on the sides of his feet.

He stumbled up to the air transport, pitching headlong into the frame once the hatch was open.

He collapsed groaning in a ball on the floor.

Me, Lori, my sister and Norenio stood over him and stared as he rubbed his head and... _just lay there._

Charlie purred and nuzzled against him, but the man responded by blindly slapping him away like he were being attacked by bats in a cave.

Roy jabbered something to his girlfriend, waved her away. Sighing in disgust, the Abreya left him.

"Are you all right?" I asked.

The man did an army crawl to a bench, fat fingered something on the control console. Once the vehicle hummed to life, he slumped on the bench and dozed.

Being the last to board, Gertie nearly got pinched by the door as the ship took off.

Us children took seats, watching him with expressions of concern and dismay.

 _"Maybe we_ were _better off on our own,"_ Lori muttered. _"This guy is a spaz!"_

Roy's head and body shifted forward with the motion of the vehicle, looking like he'd be soon suffering from whiplash. He slumped back, unphased.

He didn't once throw up. I kept expecting it to happen, but it didn't. If you can get _that wasted_ without puking, it's a pretty good sign you've had _practice_ , and might even be an alcoholic.

After riding in silence for awhile, Roy made a noise like he were going to vomit, but he just snickered and sang a weird little song:

 _"Why does it hurt when I pee?_

 _Why does it hurt when I pee?_

 _Don't want no doctors sticking needles in me!_

 _Why does it hurt when I pee?"_

And then he dozed again. To my annoyance, for several days afterward, we'd often catch Charlie humming that same tune.

We disembarked at the plateau above a set of cliff dwellings, winding down a steep sort of paved road among cylindrical and domed concrete buildings with that cactus like Burkina Faso style design. Below, at the end of these buildings, I could see a shore, some docks, and a swampy lake, obviously not the same place they generated electricity from.

The road flattened along an alley of the concrete structures, dropped down steeply again between buildings, descending another steeply angled street. I thought for certain Roy would pitch headfirst and go rolling like a barrel to the bottom, but he only did his Tin Woodsman routine, kind of half running downhill to maintain balance.

We rushed to keep up as he stumbled past a row of buildings to the shore. Along the way, we encountered a Qulpari, weirdly attired in a robe of what appeared to be neon purple cowry shells. The stranger appeared to have a compulsion for spinning like a dervish, I guess for similar religious reasons.

Not the most pleasant place. It smelled funny. There were bugs, and the water had a layer of scum across the surface. Yet, weirdly enough, a number of 'house boats' lay moored there, the nicer ones attached to docks.

Roy waded out backwards into the swamp, spreading his arms. "Welcome to _Dago Buys.._." He rubbed his face. _"Daygobia..._ " He again looked like he was going to hurl, but didn't. "That... _Star Wars_ place. _Never mind._ "

I found it confusing that he'd know about the second star wars film if he'd been 'abducted' long before it came out, but he had access to all kinds of _recordings._

He slurmed his way past a strangely leaved swamp cypress in a seemingly aimless direction, leaned on another for support, then mucked up to the gunwale of a house boat, hopping onto its deck.

The thing looked rusty, decrepit, its dome cracked, the cylindrical portion covered in green stains. At first I thought he were drunk and randomly trespassing on private property. Following close, we watched as he pulled the door open, stumbling inside.

Roy lived in squalor. For furniture, he only owned a few chairs and a table. I saw some dusty wall decorations, but they weren't hung up. He had a hammock for a bed. The human sized table held a few alien electronics. He had a normal but dirty looking floor. Well, normal if you lived in a place that used tatami. At least it wasn't swampy like outside. The place smelled like stale Pepperidge Farm Goldfish crackers, mildew and old pizza.

The thing I noticed most of all, though, was all the stuffing scattered across the floor. The culprit was one of those catfish creatures. It smiled, wagged its tail, jumping up and licking us.

Apologizing and muttering something about a leash, Roy told us to go outside and wait. When we didn't, he went about searching for the item, marched up to the table and hit his head on its edge.

He collapsed on the floor and idly lay there as his pet licked him in the face.

It took awhile for him to recover and get a crude rope like leash attached to his pet. For a moment, I thought he intended to sleep on the floor. "How...about... _we_ walk your friend?" I suggested.

Clearly the answer was no, since he managed to stagger to his feet.

He stumbled outside, leading his pet into the swamp. It drank and went to the bathroom in the same body of water. The sight discouraged me from any thoughts of making deep fried nuggets out of the creature.

The pet led _Roy_ up on shore, dragged him up a slanting street. Roy fell on the pavement, the Dolcani tugging crazily on its leash and playing around in the bushes of exotic plants.

 _"Some parental guardian,"_ Lori grumbled.


	30. Chapter 30: Gertie's Request

Roy wasn't getting up very fast, apparently content with recovering from his liquid based indiscretion right there on the pavement. He snored.

"What should we do with him?" I asked. "He's kinda big. I don't think we can lift him."

"Can you _'use The Force'_ and float him around or something?" Lori asked.

I sighed. "That's not exactly easy. I mean, _if he were the size of a baseball..._ "

She crossed her arms. "Oh that's right. _You only make potatoes float._ "

"Look, Lori. I know we've done something like that before with the Thunder Road, but _that was when we were in danger._ "

My sister nodded. "And we get headaches and nosebleeds."

"Luke Skywalker never got nosebleeds."

"Yeah? Well _he's a fictional character._ Also, have you seen _Scanners?_ Telepathy isn't always pretty. _The guy in_ Dune _actually cried blood._ "

"Well it's a good thing you're not doing _that! I wouldn't know how to_ begin _doing first aid!"_

Gertie shuffled her feet. "We can't do it very long. _What if we drop him and he gets hurt?"_

"Then maybe you could... _practice on him._.. _Try some short distances._ "

I and Gertie stared at each other.

Gertie shrugged.

"Where should we put him? The flying thing or his house?"

"The house is closer."

"Good idea," Lori joked. _"He might get a nice bath along the way._ "

"How will we get back to ET?"

She shook her head. _"Got anything against a little joyride?"_

Since that was settled, my sister and I got close to Roy's prone form, concentrating really hard on thoughts of raising the man into the air.

It didn't work. My misgivings about my powers made me hesitant to stretch those mental muscles, and Gertie seemed to be... _half hearted in her attempts._ We watched the man groan and fight to keep his pet from running away.

Feeling Gertie's eyes on me, I turned and looked at her. Ever since I'd called her a baby, there was something about her overall behavior that seemed... _broken._ It didn't help that she'd eavesdropped and heard me bad-mouth her even more.

When Roy had been drinking, we had his antics to distract us, but in the flying machine she kept giving me and Lori pained glances, then she'd have this _faraway look_.

Now, as we waited for our adult guardian to... _get his act together,_ she had that faraway look again. " _Elliott._..you think if, if I stay at that _beach place_ long enough...that um, um... _I'll find someone?_ "

This was not exactly a conversation I wanted to have with her. "Gertie, it's like what Pabyeba said, I don't think-"

" _I didn't mean a person, Elliott._ I mean, you think, _me and a Qulpari-_ "

I reddened. "Gertie, about what I said-"

" _I'm being grown up._ I have to think about these things. There won't be any... _boys for me here._ I..."

"Gertie," Lori said. "I know we might be...on this planet for awhile, but I think that's a little... _drastic._ "

That pained expression again. " _Why? Roy has Norenio..._ "

I sighed. "Gertie, look, I'm sorry I said those things to you-"

"You don't need to apologize, Elliott. _You're right._ I _have_ been a baby. I _do_ need to grow up."

My stomach sank. I've heard of insults being compared to driving nails into a board. You can pull the nails out, but you're still left with nail holes. It appeared I'd left one in my sister.

Gertie was a delicate flower, and I'd just wilted her. My power to wither, I guess, was not limited to plants. "Gertie, I was being stupid. Don't pay me any attention..."

"If we never go back home, who's going to make love to me?"

"Gertie," Lori said. "You're too young to be thinking about all that."

"You don't even know what making love means," I muttered under my breath.

"Stop treating me like a baby!" Gertie shouted. _"I am not too young!_ "

"Gertie, can you at least _wait awhile_ before doing... _something strange_?"

"You're only a few years younger than us," Lori said. "Can you wait until you turn our age before... _trying to be weird as this guy?"_

Gertie furrowed her brow, gave a little nod, and then... _"He's not weird._ I wanna be like him when I get older."

I and Lori stared at the drunk on the ground, then each other. _"Really?"_

Gertie shrugged. _"He knows how to be an adult_ , in this place."

Lori and I exchanged disbelieving looks.

"Now we _have_ to go back home!"

I frowned. " _And end up in some government bunker?"_

My girlfriend rubbed her face in frustration. "Oh my God, _your sister..._ " I think she wanted to say something else, but Gertie was right there. _"I feel so bad for her."_

My sister looked saddened. "So you think...you think a Qulpari _wouldn't_ want to make love to me."

"Gertie, I don't know."

"You still have a lot of time to... _worry about that_ , Gertie. Let's not jump into anything just yet. I mean, _Roy didn't expect_ us _to show up!_ "

She gave a reluctant nod.

Since there was nothing I could do about Gertie's emotional damage, I just gave up and pointed to our guardian. "Think we can move him?"

 _"We can try."_

We actually got the man into the air, about a foot off the ground, but it hurt my head, and Roy woke up, yelling incoherently at us.

His Dolcani got loose and we had to run and grab the creature's leash before it disappeared.

Somehow Roy was conscious enough to grab the Dolcani, but not enough to get moving. He curled up with his damp wiggling pet like a teddy bear.

 _"Oh brother!"_ Lori complained.

Roy closed his eyes, drooled as he snored on the ground.

"Great. We're stuck in this hell hole until he wakes up."

I glanced back at the swamp. "I saw some paper in his house. Maybe we can leave a note and go back to ET."

"What if we _just stay in his house?_ "

Gertie suggested.

Lori put her hands on her hips. " _No way am I spending the night in that dump!_ Where's the paper?"

Roy owned a stack of what you might describe as 'recycle paper,' and it technically wasn't even paper. Aliens didn't make wasteful things like napkins, phone books, memo pads or toilet paper. The closest thing you could get was the kind of crafts project where you take a bunch of cloth rags and boil them into art paper with ribbons and dried flowers woven through them. I don't even want to talk about the three seashells in the bathroom. They didn't have pens either.

Roy owned a rough sort of quill, ink and blotter setup. I wondered how much he drank from the bottle while writing memos. It was the Fred Flintstone method, so I didn't know what I was doing and screwed up my first two notes, a third when I tried to blot it dry like Curious George. The fourth note came out a little better, so I carefully bore it out across the swamp and stuck it in the man's pocket. "Were you serious about _just..joyriding around?_ I kinda want to _get back and go to bed._ "

"What do _you_ think? I have no idea how to operate that thing. Frankly, going on a random spin to some unknown area of the planet would be a highlight of an otherwise crappy day. But sleep is cool too. I'm open to suggestions."

"I dunno...maybe we can... _find someone to direct us back._ "

Lori stared at the buildings. Unlike ET's pad, we saw very few Qulpari hanging around outside. Well, except the one that liked to spin. "So we just knock on a door and ask a random stranger how to locate... _Vorxora_ , and hope they know who we're talking about."

"We're famous," Gertie said. "We're the only species like us on this planet. Surely someone knows."

"Still, how do we know Vorxora isn't a common name? Like _John,_ or _Mary?_ "

 _"Maybe ask them if they know the John that knows us?"_

Shaking her head, Lori marched a couple feet ahead, then stopped, staring at the Qulpari with the twirling fetish. The cowry shells tinkled as he spun, sounding like rain. I couldn't help but wonder if he were doing a _rain dance._ "So, I guess unless we want to knock on doors, we ask this weirdo how to operate our flying ball."

"I'll do it." Gertie approached the alien, prompting the hissing rain sound of his robes to slow. "Excuse me, sir. I know your spinning is important, but can you help me?"

The Qulpari spun. _How can I help you?_

"Tell him we need help getting back to Vorxora."

"What's your name?" Gertie asked the stranger.

 _Larven._

She smiled a little at the name. It _did_ sound like Marvin. " _Larven_...can you...take me to _that place to register_ for _the thing?_ "

I gawked at her. "What?"

Larven twirled counterclockwise. _I do not understand._

Gertie got red in the face. "I want to register for that thing where you sit by the beach and wait for...someone to come make love to me."

 _"Gertie!"_ Lori cried. _"What are you doing!"_

 _"Being an adult."_

"Somehow I...don't think that's what you're doing."

Larven's face wrinkled, his neck shrank, but he kept twirling. _I...still don't understand...And I am beginning to think you do not either._

Gertie cleared her throat. " _I desire a mate._ I want to register for _Nisweku_ and go to _Zaluxfa. Understand now?"_

The Qulpari snorted, made a sound like he were coughing, and stopped spinning.

He chuckled, let out a hearty guffaw, laughed until tears poured from his eyes, then waddled up to one of the buildings and knocked on the door.

Two Qulpari in orange robes came out, he spoke to them a moment, pointed to my sister, and they too started laughing.

My sister shrank in humiliation. "You're right, Elliott. I thought I was being an adult, but I guess I'm just being a dumb baby again."

"Being an adult also means making mistake-"

 _Come here,_ the Qulpari called to my sister.

Gertie brightened, almost returning to how she was before my damaging blow to her psyche. She eagerly scampered after the aliens, awaiting their next words with breathless anticipation.

They spoke. The Qulpari smiled.

Lori and I came closer to hear what the aliens had to say. I missed a few things, but I caught the part where Larven pointed to us and said, _You are already three._ _Your Sogwuba is complete._

Gertie looked like she'd been asked to eat liver. "No! _Not Sogwuba!"_ She pointed to me. " _Co-hatchling!_ Same... _parents._ "

Larven rubbed his chin. His companions murmured him, and to each other.

At last Larven said, _"Follow._ "

We did, trailing him up the hill.

"Gertie," Lori hissed. "When I told you to get us directions, I meant _directions home!_ I thought we agreed you were going to wait until you were older for this kind of stuff!"

" _Pabyeba said I'd be waiting a long time._ I don't wanna make my wait any longer."

"Oh my God."

I sighed. "I guess it can't do any harm, can it?"

We followed Larven to the vehicle, carefully watching how he worked buttons on the console. The airship took off.

It was dark, so I couldn't exactly tell where we were going. I saw trees, tree buildings, and lights in the shadows indicating something like businesses and habitations, but mostly it was dark foliage, branches, and unfamiliar unlit buildings.

The illumination got better when we reached our destination: An ivy colored glass and metal structure resembling a twelve sided dungeon die with four hair curler shaped towers. Its windows had a pentagonal design that made me think of the Chrysler pentastar. The lighting setup, being somewhat unusual, continually changed colors from yellow to green to blue to red.

A line of Qulpari stood waiting outside the building. Not a super long line, but not exactly short either.

To the aliens' credit, they weren't just idly holding their breath for someone to `pick them up.' When our craft landed, I noticed quite a few chatting with each other, some even waddling off in couples or in threes.

We got stares the moment we stepped outside.

At first, it was the usual passing curiosity and muttering we'd gotten in the market, _but when we actually got in line_ , the aliens pretty much reacted like women seeing a man checking in with an obstetrician. Offended murmurs, looks of amusement and horrified disbelief, laughter at crude jokes we couldn't understand.

Some Qulpari let out strangled squawking noises in outrage, reminding me of the times ET had gotten frightened of things and let out a crazy cry.

They made insinuations about Larven, forcing him to explain himself several times, especially about how a _Viglalah_ from the _Yerronoq_ spinning cult, wearing the shell robe, would do something so offensive. Us humans didn't have it any easier, they kept saying we have a group of three, and if we're so dissatisfied about it, why don't we break up, were we trying to get a fourth person?

Charlie just flew around, looking generally amused.

After standing around for more than ten minutes embarrassing ourselves, we eventually became too much of a spectacle, and a Qulpari with a bone breastplate waded through the crowd to us, demanding an explanation.

I apologized to him.

"We're sorry," Lori said, red faced. "We were just leaving."

But Gertie had her fists clenched, staring the guard down. "I wanna register for _Nisweku."_

The breastplated one laughed, asked Larven for a clarification, then laughed some more. He asked why Gertie couldn't mate with me or Lori. The others in the crowd were finding this hilarious too. I think someone even _recorded her_.

Forcing himself to be serious (but with tears of mirth in his eyes), the guard (his name was Utyolcu) led us through the crowd, into the building. The crowd was, after all, too stunned to be much of an obstacle...when they weren't eager to let my sister go make an ass of herself.

The main `welcome center', unsurprisingly, had the shape of a pentagon. Qulpari stood in three rows before a desk in the rear of the far triangular section. Again, some _did_ actually find partners and leave, but there was still some demand for the services of the staff members with their little handheld computers.

Where there weren't glass windows or plants, we saw a number of... _strange paintings_ , ones that told me things about ET's species that I never wanted to know, and left me with twice as many unanswered questions. The _bedroom objects_ , for example.

Utyolcu helped us cut through the line to the main desk. After enduring laughter from the staff, and the same questions. Our guide and these workers got into a protracted debate, the enrollees throwing in their two cents whenever it came to something like a resolution.

A pair of elevators stood behind the registration desk. One of the staff members, Izrigma, the representative of yernar, the third sex, led my sister into it, but stopped me and Lori. _You are not an applicant_ , it said to me. _Why is it necessary for you to see the Gorputug_? Despite how I felt a twinge of guilt about my sister nearly dying under my watch, or maybe because of it, I said, "She's my responsibility. I don't want her making an unwise decision."

The Qulpari and those within earshot laughed at this. _Too late!_

Lori stepped forward. "It is a... _legal requirement_... _in our culture_ to have... _witnesses_ during... _important life events_ like marriages and buying cars and stuff."

I could tell Lori had lost them, so I backed her up. "Things like uslofya and mogza are not legitimate without other humans present." I realized that hadn't helped my parents marriage, but _I didn't want to tell_ the Qulpari _that._ "She is our responsibility. It's important to... _the ones that hatched her._ "

The representative frowned, gave a solemn nod. _Follow._

Larven stayed behind like a good little Qulpari, but Charlie flew in after us, irrespective of the rules as the Cheshire cat.

The elevator had windows, but it was dark outside, so we only saw parts of the surrounding grounds, and moving elevator machinery.

A few seconds later, the door came open and we entered a wedge of the dodecahedron, one that kind of reminded me of Superman's lair with all its giant crystals and such. These crystals, however, didn't look like ice, they had bright colors, lights and parts that resembled computers. I figured they needed a lot of computing power to pair all those Qulpari together without someone marrying their distant cousins or something.

As we traveled further in, I spotted a pale white Qulpari with a long Fu Manchu mustache seated behind a desk. When Gertie saw him, she laughed and pointed. _"Doesn't he look like Spike from the_ Peanuts _cartoon?_ "

There _was_ a passing resemblance. Though he didn't have floppy ears or a dog nose, he had the right coloration, his mustache was black and scraggly, and his eyelids looked appropriately weary and lopsided.

Utyolcu introduced us to this stranger. His name was actually Vukvuzan, but the other name stuck.

 _What are these..._ creatures _doing in my office?_ _I must remind you, my health is not strong enough to endure foreign contaminants of this kind._

So. Spike wasn't the friendliest sort.

Utyolcu explained my sister's unusual request.

 _You already have a_ _Sogwuba_ , Spike said.

We once again had to explain how we were related.

 _You wish to find a mate for yourself?_

Gertie nodded.

 _You will be waiting a long time._

She swallowed. "I'm also okay with a Qulpari or Abreya."

Spike grimaced in disgust. "Eeew!" But he made a note in his computer anyway. _Experimentation._

"Can you delay that second request?" I blurted. "Make finding a human the priority?"

The Qulpari looked at Gertie. _It is your body and life cycle. Do you wish for him to make decisions about it?_

My sister thought a moment. "... Just this time."

The Qulpari took a deep breath. _I will give you a delay of ten years for that second request. How is that?_

Gertie frowned. "Why so long? _Are you siding with my brother?"_

Spike gave her a look like he'd just received a mouth full of vinegar. _No. I am siding with_ me. _I don't want to be around when that particular Ojulno goes into effect._ He cleared his throat. _I still think you will be waiting a long time. You are asking a lot, even from a Qulpari._

 _"Then that's just how it's going to have to be."_

The Qulpari opened a crystal, plunking an... _oddly familiar_ _object_ down on the desk. Lori gave me an uncomfortable stare.

Spike took something that looked like glowing shooter marbles from the object, setting them out in front of us.

The alien mooed, then began a ritual speech. _This Ridvucha now belongs to...Gertie, to signify its_ (he referred to my sister) _voyage along the path of Nisweku._

I'd seen Qulpari wearing those bracelets all over the place, but hadn't put two and two together until that moment. "So _that's_ what those things are for!"

Gertie tried to take the bracelet, but Spike stopped her, placing a glowing blue coin in the band. _This Mialfep links you to the Maogmira_ , _the great pool of need_. He suppressed a laugh. _It bears the color blue to represent Rirbihan_ (my ear slug translated this as blue again). _Blue is purity, blue is peaceful, blue is alone. Rirbihan_ _is the name of the first living Qulpari, and the first number and first letter of our alphabet. You may don the_ _Ridvucha now, to advertise_ (that's the closest translation I can come up with) _your blueness._

Gertie eagerly obeyed. The bracelet was adjustable, explaining how both Lori _and_ thin limbed Qulpari could wear it.

Spike set a glowing green shooter marble to one side of the desk. _Limjulm_ (or green) _represents the first partner. A binary union. It is the second letter and second number of our alphabet. When a suitable mate comes along, he shall place this_ _Osatbir_ _in the obelisk of_ _Hotyupav_ , _and your Ridvucha_ _will glow green blue_.

Spike placed a pink marble next to it. _Osatbir is the second stage of love-journey, Tonavra_ (it's pink) _the third. Tonavra was the third_ _Qulpari created, and Tonavra_ _is the third letter number of our alphabet. When you have found both_ _Limjulm and Tolnavra_ , _your_ _Ridvucha will glow_ _Rubarag_ (purple). _Until the day when Sogwuba_ _is complete, wear this always. May the Great Master Ponai bless your love quest with joy and completeness._

"Thank you," Gertie whispered.

"I think I'm going to be sick to my stomach," Lori said.

I sighed. " _I know_ , but I think this is exactly what she needs."

 _"That's not what I meant._ I mean, _earlier._ Earlier I...thought I was commenting a victimless crime, but...well, now I know I actually stole from the very people I care about. It's the worst feeling in the world, like getting full on chips."

She had said this while wearing the translator. Spike pushed a button on a handheld computer next to him. _Did you hear that, Qabmoxi?_

 _Yes,_ came the reply.

The screen flickered, and a Qulpari in a paisley robe and moose antlers appeared in the room like a ghost.

"They have holograms!" I muttered.

Lori stared. "That's the guy who gave me the punishment thing! How did he know we'd be here?"

"I think, after that scene we made, _everyone_ knows we're here."

 _Congratulations_ , the creature said. _You have just earned the jabbe of your quarjabbe._ _Prepare the_ _Yaoquab_.

 _It is prepared._ Spike brought out a little device that looked like a chop stamp, grabbed Lori's hand, pressed it into the skin above her thumb.

"Ouch dammit!" She shrieked. "What did you...?"

When the alien pulled the chop stamp away, she had a small raised red circle on her skin.

Spike pointed a glowing finger at the I injured area. "Ouch...dammit."

Lori glared at her. " _Spike, what the hell?_ "

"She wants to know why you did that," Gertie explained more tactfully.

 _You have the jabbe. Now you only need to complete the quar, your length of service._

" _Gee, thanks, Spike,_ " Lori groaned. "Now I have a stupid scar to remind me of my stupid punishment!"

 _It is part of the sentence. You do not complete Quarjabbe without quar._

And then, to my surprise, he raised his hand, showing us the circular marking on his own flesh.


	31. Chapter 31: Late Night Excursion

Spike's marking, unlike Lori's, had a symbol in the center. He pointed to it. _The jabbe is administrated at the end of sentence._

Lori blew a raspberry.

We returned to the elevator.

"So how are we getting back to ET's place?" Lori asked.

Earlier, we had watched, horrified, as a group of Qulpari stepped into our vehicle and took off.

"Hey!" I had shouted, running after them, but then I flew up into the air, and a tinkering of cowry shells came after me.

I floated back down in front of Larven. _"What."_

"Those Qulpari just stole our ride!" Lori had shouted.

Larven spread his arms, waved them in a circle. "Hujbosa." My ear slug gave me a translation sort of like `Sharing' and `Honor system.' _We can get you another when we are finished._

I frowned at the elevator door. "We'll have to ask Larven about getting another vehicle."

Things got _even more interesting_ when we stepped out at the main floor. Gertie, proudly displaying her trophy, inspired a lot of noise. Several went, "Mudo mudo", shaking their heads or covering their faces, horrified at what they were seeing. More laughter and jokes from the others. They called Gertie _Boofsuru,_ which roughly translates as `The Weird One.'

If this were earth, I imagine there would have been some violent action, maybe someone throwing rocks, but several of them, turning neon blue, merely flopped down on the floor, bowing their heads as they did breathing exercises until their flesh resumed normal coloration.

Then, like Mennonites, the angriest ones practiced the art of shunning, turning their backs to us to pretend we weren't there. Our friend Larven took it well, asking for an explanation of what happened, even becoming visibly relieved once he discovered the terms of Gertie's... _Ojulno._

 _Time teaches one_.

Those within earshot seemed pleased by this as well, a few, but not all of the shunners turning back around and murmuring to each other.

We asked Larven to help us get a ride home, but that proved to be unnecessary. We found Norenio and ET standing by the open hatch of a blue flying machine. Charlie purred and rubbed against them.

When ET noticed Gertie's bracelet, he shrank back, rubbed his face in dismay. "Mudo."

"She is lonely," said Norenio. "Maybe she will find a playmate."

ET shuddered. _This seems like a bad idea._

Larven explained the situation to him.

After a moment's discussion, ET led us into the vehicle.

Since Larven apparently already had a mate (hence no reason to stay at the registration building), he joined us on the padded bench.

This was the first time I'd seen ET look genuinely uneasy. Even when Gertie had put him in a dress, he hadn't looked this embarrassed. He did not speak. We rose into the air in awkward silence.

At last, ET said, _Gertie,_ _are you in_ _kemmer?_ The word had associations with breeding.

 _"I...I don't know,"_ she admitted. "I mean, in case it happens, I wanna be ready. _Elliott and Lori have each other._ I want... _something_ too. _Pabyeba_ did _say it would take a long time..."_

ET smirked. _Yes, I think it will._ He shook his head. _Pabyeba..._

" _Well_ ," I ventured. "At least we'll know if there are any other humans on this planet."

Lori stuck out her tongue. "Yeah, _if they happen to be in kemmer! What if it's an old man?"_

I cringed. "I... _guess we can always tell him to go away..._ "

The idea didn't set well with my sister either. " _You'll protect me,_ won't you, Elliott?"

I gave her a nod. _"I owe you at least_ that much. _"_ I turned to face Norenio. "Where's Roy?"

She frowned. "He is...` _Ten sheets to wind._ ' I put him in bed, in his house."

"I can't imagine what he's going to think about what Gertie did."

Norenio looked genuinely puzzled. "Did she do something wrong?"

"Yes!" Lori blurted. But then she noticed Gertie's reaction. "... _No._ I don't know."

"I...do not understand. _If I and Roy Neary can be happy_..."

Lori rubbed her face. "Of course _you'd_ say that."

"Our biology are different, but we satisfy each other _needs._ We have _mutual-love._ "

"Never mind," Lori sighed.

"I'm amazed you moved the guy," I said. "He's so heavy."

The Abreya just smiled. "Gertie, have you seen how Qulpari make babies?"

ET rolled his eyes.

"No," my sister said. "But I saw _pictures._ "

"You should _study_ , if you truly lust want Qulpari."

ET covered his face. "Mudo."

 _"Maybe we should ask Roy about that,"_ Lori said diplomatically. "I mean, he _did_ say he saw some things."

Gertie nodded, wide eyed. You _know_ she respected the man.

We returned to ET's hut, curling up on the pallets he'd set out for us.

I slept okay for maybe four hours, but then I noticed something licking my ear. At first I thought it was Charlie, but then it felt strangely... _human_ , the lips, then the teeth gently nipping on a lobe...

My eyes flew open and I found Lori's arm wrapped around me. "Lori, what-"

Her mouth moved down, warm breath tingling my neck. "I can't stop thinking about you. I can't even sleep right now, _you got me so hot._.."

I swallowed. _"I... did?"_

Instead of answering, she put a finger to her lips, leading me out of the hut, toward Admasca's place.

I stopped. "Wait, Lori. I... _you said you didn't want this._ I mean, what if something happens? What if ..." I could barely say it. It came out as a whisper. _"What if we have a baby?"_

 _"I changed my mind."_

 _"You mean...?"_

She nodded. _"I don't care anymore._ I love you. This is a good place. I feel safe, I don't think we'd have too much difficulty-"

I kissed her, interrupting her train of thought.

Lori, kissing back, led me by the hand down the walkway.

I suddenly noticed we weren't traveling in the right direction. I know, I should have noticed earlier, but _I really wasn't doing much thinking_. "Wait, where are we going?"

She took me to the flying machine. _"Somewhere private."_

I blushed. _"And you know a place?"_

I know, it _was_ kind of weird, she had never gone anywhere without me, but I guessed she meant randomly flying somewhere secluded in the pod. She nodded to me. "I think I got an idea."

"But-" I glanced, with meaning, back at ET's neighborhood.

Lori opened the hatch. _"You really want that little scamp watching us as we're going at it?"_

I suddenly felt hot. _"...No."_

She pulled me inside, shutting the door.

"I've been watching them. I know how this thing works..." Lori pushed some buttons on the computer, kissed me on the lips.

The vehicle began to rise, and so did our passions.

For a moment, I paused my kissing to glance out the window at the darkened landscape speeding by, lights gleaming out weirdly shaped buildings like Jack O' Lanterns. "Where are we going?"

 _"Do you really care?"_

I shook my head, parted her lips.

We tasted each other's mouths, Lori's trembling fingers undoing the top part of my outfit.

She stepped away, turning her back to me as she opened the front of her outfit.

Our vehicle landed, the hatch swinging open on its own accord.

I saw Lori's clothing tumble to the floor, but of her body I saw nothing but a pair of naked legs disappearing outside.

I quickly gave chase, but I only got a few steps out of the hatch before ramming into the tree.

A fog lifted from my mind, and I realized I'd been dreaming. _Sleepwalking,_ in fact.

I glanced back and saw the pod, glowing and empty, but no sign of Lori's clothes.

And then, ahead of me, I saw that damn wooden door at Yatgibi's place, overgrown with clinging vines and branches.

None of the events of this little late night adventure were real! Lori was probably still sound asleep at ET's place, and here I was, _out here, looking like a complete ass!_

The anger, the disappointment, the frustration and rage, it radiated through every inch of my body. I screamed, ramming my fists into the bark until my knuckles turned bloody.

"Good," Yatgibi muttered in my ear. "Now...try it again."

Memories came unbidden to my mind. The sheer unfiltered hatred I felt against the government that captured me and ruined my life, combined with the anguish I felt about my little romantic adventure being nothing more than wishful thinking, filled me with a rage I'd never felt before. My hands glowed like red lanterns.

"If you knew that your whole life would amount to failure, would you try so hard to please others?"

I frowned at him, the red light fading somewhat. "What?"

"You're not going to amount to anything," the alien continued. "You're not worth very much. So why not do what pleases you? What makes _you_ feel good? There _is_ a pleasure to this."

"Yatgibi...What...are you trying to do?"

The alien gave me a disarming smile. " _Only trying to help._ There is vast untapped power in you, if you only learned to harness it correctly."

 _"And you're doing this by insulting me?"_

"I am only telling you some... _unpleasant truths_. Now that you've left your world behind, _it's unlikely you will achieve very much of importance_. _You will die alone and forgotten._ "

 _"If you're...trying to make me hate you...it's working."_

Yatgibi grinned. _"Fire always begins with a blossom."_

"But wait. I _did_ succeed. _I built a spaceship and got here._ That's something, isn't it?"

 _"You had help._ Can you truly say it was _your_ accomplishment? Even if it was, what next? _Your entire existence is defined by that one thing._ "

I couldn't disagree. My encounter with ET and my homemade spaceship. That's my claim to fame. That's _all_ people will remember me for. Nothing else in my entire life will matter to anyone, except maybe my family and friends. I'm just the freak, the missing kid, the government asset.

Worse, I'd never see mom and dad again.

I let out a primal scream, and half the wooden material sealing the door cracked and split like it had been hit by a seismic tremor.

 _It is early. What are you doing out here?_

I glanced back at the factory and saw Yatgibi standing by the door.

My first thought had been _`How did you get over there so quickly?'_

When realization dawned on me, I began to question my own sanity.

 _He hadn't been there either._


	32. Chapter 32: Small Fires

For a moment I just froze in front of the tree, trying to come to grips with what happened, where fact had stopped and fantasy had begun. What was live and what was Memorex?

I mentally rewound back to the moment we got done talking with Spike. It _seemed unreal_ that ET and Norenio knew where to find us, but Gertie _had_ caused a lot of controversy. I asked him about this on the way back to his hut.

 _My wujemzu_ (kind of like an uncle-family relationships are hard to describe when you have three partners) _Nuomgob sent me a message asking me if I knew anything about a group of large pale skinned creatures looking for_ _Nisweku registration_ , he said. _When I noticed you missing, I got suspicious, especially when_ _Pabyeba mentioned a conversation she had with Gertie._

So, nothing false about any of that. It had the sort of uncomfortable awkwardness you'd expect from reality, and so did the stuff that happened before. Sleeping on the floor afterwards, that was kind of humbling and pitiful too.

So...the only part that didn't make sense was how I got to Yatgibi's place. Did I subconsciously memorize the computer commands necessary for bringing me back there?

Yatgibi waddled up to the door, examining my handiwork.

He smiled, patted me on the lower back, due to the height disadvantage. _Excellent work Elliott. We are nearing the fruition of our goal. It is true what they say, 'Fire begins with a small blossom.'_

I suddenly felt cold. "What did you just say?"

He shrugged. _Your powers are developing. They began like a small spark, but now they blossom._

I frowned, not liking how much he talked like my hallucination.

The alien placed his hands on the door, made them glow. More pieces cracked. _Tell your mate she is exempt from work today. Your contribution has been more than sufficient._

That sounded strange, but it _was_ somewhere near early dawn. " _My mate,_ " I grumbled. I _still_ wasn't sure... _what happened_...had actually happened. " _Have you seen her?_ Is she anywhere around here?"

The look on Yatgibi's face told me he didn't care one way or another. _I do not know. I was asleep, and you woke me up with your noise. Not that I'm complaining, of course, you have helped us more than you know._

I saw the alien's friends rushing out, to help him with the tree.

I searched around the pod and platform, but could find no sign of Lori. I gave it up, climbed into the pod.

I worried I wouldn't know how to get back. I wasn't even sure how I'd gotten the thing parked next to the tree instead of its usual spot at the platform, but immediately after the hatch closed, it started moving on its own.

If Lori was still at Yatgibi's place, I was going to be in even more trouble.

Knowing what I did about the pods and 'the honor system,' I panicked, thinking I'd be taken off to Timbuktu and have everyone worried sick, but then I saw _Roy's face_ on the screen, wincing, clearly suffering from a hangover. " _Kid, if you were planning to run away, you forgot to bring along your sister and girlfriend._..Look, I probably shouldn't have been drinking. You probably get enough of that from your old man, but _I promise I'm not going to slap you around._ I meant what I said about returning you to your folks the way I found you." He sighed. " _Despite the fact I'm really pissed at you._ "

I was insulted by what he implied about my Dad, but he didn't let me speak. I guess, even if he did, I really had nothing to say to him. I mean, _I was still trying to figure out how I'd gotten to the tree._

"What were you doing over there anyway? _Did you just need some air?_ I mean, _Yatgibi is a neat guy_ , but I didn't exactly think you two were pals."

I scowled at the screen. _"We're not."_ I paused a moment, panicking again. "Wait. Lori isn't with me."

Roy rubbed his head, squinting at me. "Yeah, so?"

"But..." I floundered. "Have you _seen_ Lori?"

Roy shrugged. "She's with me. Why?"

I flushed red. "No reason."

"You seem... _out of sorts_ , kid. Did Mister Yatgibi slip _you_ some Boqunze while you were over there? If you wanted to get _hammered_ so badly, _you could have at least stolen some from me!_ "

"Wait, how did you know where I was?"

"Your pod has a tracking system. _And a parental override._ Your friend _Vorxora_ showed me how it worked."

I heard mumbling in the background. "Oh. _And Lori wants to know who gave you the right to chew on her ear."_

After dropping that bombshell, he disappeared from the monitor, leaving me feeling worse than before.

So now _I knew for a fact_ that Lori had never been there. Although it was nice to not worry about leaving anyone behind, it also meant I might end up wearing a straight jacket.

When the pod opened in ET's area, I found everyone waiting outside the hatch, nobody except Charlie looking too happy. Gertie looked hurt, Roy... _pissed_ , obviously, Norenio worried, ET and his Qulpari friends: sad, terribly confused, or both. Lori wouldn't even make eye contact with me.

"Guys," I said. "I... just sleepwalked. I...don't know what to tell you. I'm sorry."

Lori glared. " _You looked and sounded wide awake to me._ I think you're just making excuses. Whatever you're trying to pull, _no is still no._ "

I stared at her. "How did you get back here?"

She gave me this look like I was crazy. "Oh I don't know, _because I never left?_ "

 _"And you just let me go?"_

 _"You said you were only getting some air!_ How was _I_ supposed to know you were going to run off?"

Yeah, so maybe Lori was less than understanding, but it sounded like I wasn't entirely blameless, either. I couldn't deny that I had done a bunch of weird things in my sleep, and I had no witnesses that could say I didn't look awake while doing them.

I felt my anger rising, red light flaring through my hands. I had to force myself to be calm. "I thought about telling you you don't have to work at Yatgibi's place today, _on account of me doing such a good job_ , but you know what? _Now I don't care._ Go back there and play with your alien monster poop. You seem to like it more than me!"

She marched up and slapped me across the face. " _Maybe Gertie had the right idea._ You're such a jerk, I think I'd be better off with Oxnizjel! I hope you and your stupid tree have many great times together!"

Charlie flew between us, looking cheerful. "Jerrrk!"

Lori giggled. _"You spoke!"_

Purring, Charlie said the word again.

 _"Gee thanks,_ Charlie!" I snarled.

"Jerk jerk jerk," Charlie repeated merrily.

"You want me to _show you how much a jerk I can be?"_ I threatened. "Keep it up! _I'll use you as my personal punching bag!_ In fact, _I'll_ make good _on what Lori said about killing you again!"_

Charlie flew in close. _"Jerk!"_

I swung my fist, but he did his puffer fish routine and darted away the moment I made the attempt.

Lori was laughing.

Even Gertie and ET's Qulpari friends were chuckling. I could take no more of their mockery.

I hated Charlie, I hated Lori, and above everything else I hated myself. Compiled with everything else, I found the negative emotion boiling up within myself, threatening to destroy me if it didn't find some outlet.

All that murderous hate I'd been practicing came to the fore, my hands glowing like red flashlights, and an evil instinct welled up inside me, prompting me to scream and lash out at Charlie like I'd attacked that tree.

At first, I thought nothing would happen. All I was doing was spreading my hands like some wizard in _Dungeons and Dragons_ , but then a blast of red energy flashed from my palms.

Charlie shrieked as... _whatever it was_ tore a furrow down his skin, singeing his flesh, burning his puffer spikes.

"No!" ET yelled with a ferocity I didn't imagine possible.

Before I knew what was happening, I found myself smashing through a wooden rail, sailing off the edge of the platform. ET had his slimy hand outstretched, the expression on his face like a pet owner being forced to put down a sick dog. Below loomed something like a fifty foot drop to the ground.

I fumbled with my outfit, wondering how I would make the glider thing work, or if it actually would.

Pabyeba growled something, waddling to the edge as I dropped through the air. Her hand shot out, and I felt my descent slowing.

Meazquad stepped in beside her, also reaching for me. I stopped falling.

ET, with a grudging nod, assisted the two in stabilizing me in the air.

Charlie flitted above me, making a sound like `Aww, do I have to?' A moment later, he was closing his eyes, and I felt myself drifting back toward the platform.

Like deep sea fishermen reeling in a big catch, Tolmina and Colzest hurried out to give aid, and soon I lay sprawled on the wooden planks.

ET said something and the Qulpari closed on me, hands outstretched, reminding me of the nightmare visions I've always heard described in UFO abduction lore.

The minute their hands made contact with my body, it felt like I was donating platelets, as if all my vitality and energy were draining away, making me weaker and weaker and weaker.

I saw the color draining from my flesh, like that cartoon man on _Sesame Street_ that turns an orange into a deflated white ball. When their hands pulled away, I lay curled up in a fetal position, barely able to move. I was crying.

 _"It serves you right!"_ Lori said. "Just because you have magic powers doesn't mean you can go around trying to kill people that make fun of you. I'm surprised you didn't try to kill _me_!"

What she said hurt because it was true. I hated her for it, but I still loved her, which made me cry more.

Already beaten, I expected more punishment, maybe involving ET electrocuting me with lighting bolts like the Emperor on _Star Wars_ , but instead he gave me a hug. I held him close, crying on his shoulder.

"Why?" I whimpered. "Why not just let me die? Why not just destroy me?"

 _You destroy an enemy best by making them not your enemy._

I swallowed. "I was your enemy?"

 _You were never my enemy. You have merely forgotten our friendship. Alas, if only I had responded this to others I have known._

I stopped crying and sat up. ET let go.

Lori, apparently satisfied I was okay, turned up her nose and stomped back into our hut.

Gertie had nothing to say to me. She just sighed and looked sad. Apparently satisfied that I at least hadn't died and seemed to be in good health, she also left me.

Roy gawked at ET. " _Remind me to never piss you off._ "

The alien smirked a little.

The man turned his attention to me, rubbing his head, as his hangover still lingered. "Okay...so... _I think you learned your lesson about attacking people._..but what in God's name were you sneaking out all alone in the middle of the night? _Even your friends_ had the sense to stay with Vorxora!"

I reddened. "Like I said, _I was sleepwalking._ The whole thing...well, _until I got into the pod and you talked to me a few minutes ago._..I don't care what Lori says, or if you believe me. I _was_ sleepwalking."

Roy scratched his head. "I've heard of sleepwalking _and_ sleep eating. I had a buddy that even said he _attacked his wife in his sleep_ , but I've _never_ heard of _sleep driving to work._ "

"It's not a car. It's a _flying alien pod with autopilot._ "

Roy had a look on his face that said he kinda didn't want to believe me, but was accepting the story anyway. " _Okay_...so...did you _attack anyone?_ _Steal_ anything? _That's generally par for the course in these kinds of situations.._."

I shook my head. "I...don't think so. I just... _worked._ "

"Growing plants and breaking open a tomb?"

I nodded.

 _"Sounds industrious..._ Guess we're going to have to tie you down to the bed or something from now on."

I gave him a reluctant nod.

"Well, _don't run off again_."

He left for his place.

"You... do not know how to operate _shuba_ , do you?" Norenio asked me.

I shrugged. "Did I _look_ like I knew?"

Smiling, she showed me how to pull the rings and make a glider cape poof out. She offered to toss me in the air for a few practice flights, but I was still exhausted from the sleepwalking and the aliens draining me. "Thanks... maybe we can do that some other time."

I sat down on a step.

"Why did you sleepwalk?"

I laughed. _"Seriously?_ "

She _was_ serious.

"... _Once I find out the answer to that question, I'll let you know."_

Charlie winged in closer to me, his demeanor like a dog who had just gotten beaten, but still loved its master. When he opened his mouth, I thought he was going to call me a jerk again, but instead I heard a different one. _"Whyyyyee?"_

Sighing, I just shook my head. "I don't you'd understand. All I can say is that I'm sorry."

To my surprise, he responded intelligently. _"It's okay."_

His tone was sad, like it really wasn't, but he forgave me.

I stared at him in shock. _"You can communicate?"_

In response , he moaned like a baby whale.

I rolled my eyes, reached out to pet him.

He went puffer fish for a moment, then allowed me to stroke his unburned areas. "I hope someone can treat your burns, Charlie."

He gave me an expectant look.

 _"...Me?"_ I frowned. "I...don't know. _I'm...tired._ "

He made a noise like a German Shepherd with indigestion.

Humoring him, I placed my hands on his burns, but the moment I focused on healing his wounds, I got a headache, saw stars and blacked out.

I came to face down on the wooden planks.

When I sat up, I saw ET and Meazquad taking over the job of restoring Charlie's flesh. _"They took my power,"_ I groaned.

Now it was Tolmina's turn to put _his_ two cents in. _As family nennop, I must tell you that it was bad to attack 'Charlie'. It was also Ill advised for you to go off to Yatgibi's place of business on your own. You must avoid doing reckless things of this type in the future. Another thing: I would suggest asking permission before attempting to devour anything on your prospective mate's body. She may take offense. If you continue to make unwise decisions such as these, I suggest you begin consulting me on a regular basis._

I rolled my eyes. " _Thanks. If I need somebody to repeat what everyone else just said to me, I'll be sure to ask for your assistance."_

The sarcasm, being lost on him, prompted a proud nod. _I provide advice through other methods as well!_

 _"Thanks,"_ I groaned. _"Maybe later."_

Tolmina wandered off.

I sat on the edge of the platform, staring into the night sky. In addition to the two moons, the constellations were completely unfamiliar. It explained the strangeness of certain astrological diagrams I'd seen in various places (like the market). I hadn't studied the pictures enough to connect the dots and figure out what anything was...or the location of earth.

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a short brown body sitting down next to me. _I did not want to hurt you, Elliott. You are my friend._

I sighed. "They seem to think I have talent. Yatgibi said _a fire starts small._ "

ET's neck shrank, his expression becoming grave. _Mold grows best in the dark._

He left me alone with that thought.


	33. Chapter 33: Sovirox

_"Connect the dots...la la la!...Connect the dots...la la la!"_

It was breakfast, and Roy had his communicator projecting Pee Wee's playhouse on ET's wall. "I really wanted to show you _It's A Wonderful Life_ ," he had told us. "But I couldn't find the recording. I couldn't even find _this guy's_ Christmas episode."

Gertie had asked him what time of year it was on earth, then looked very depressed when he said it was probably some time around Christmas. When he mentioned Pee Wee, she brightened up. Besides being one of her favorite shows, Pee Wee _did_ have an episode where everyone gives him fruit cake and he uses it to build a wing on his house. Roy hadn't found us the right episode, though. At least Gertie was laughing.

The program came on the tail of a news recording talking about the `Black Monday' stock market crash. I stared absently as the actor moved on from video connect-the-dots to his video phone booth gimmick.

"You find any other recordings?" Lori asked the man.

"Not much, just an Academy Awards program and the _Yellow Submarine_ cartoon."

After getting some rest, and food in my stomach, my skin had returned to its normal color. Well, _normal-ish_. I still kinda looked like I'd been spending all my life indoors and hadn't gotten enough sun. Considering how I'd previously matched Spike's unnatural pallor, this was a definite improvement.

Unfortunately, other things _hadn't_ improved.

Although Charlie and ET had been forgiving, the others... _not so much_ , and even Charlie didn't hang out with me. I sat on the opposite side of the table from the girls.

"Looks like the wolf man routine worked. You didn't go anywhere after we tied you down." Roy had driven some stakes into the floor and tied me down, and it seemed to have worked.

I gave an indifferent shrug. " _Maybe._ Or maybe I just got too tired for roaming."

Lori was giving me looks like maybe she believed me now, but turned her eyes away when I caught her glance. "Lori, you want to go somewhere today? You know, _with ET? Actually tour the planet?"_

She sighed. Although Roy had allowed her to wear her fancy catsuit again, Lori had her usual outfit on, because she intended to work. I think she resented owing me anything, maybe thought I was trying to _get something over on her._ The joke would soon be on her, though.

Roy cleared his throat. "I _do_ know a place...It's kind of like a shopping mall, but _huge_ , with all kinds of stuff in it, part of it's almost like an _amusement park..._ "

My girlfriend (if I could still call her that) didn't seem thrilled. She said nothing in reply.

"You can call me a jerk all you want now," I said. "ET took my powers away. I can't hurt anyone."

Lori just frowned. "I _knew_ I shouldn't have gotten involved with you."

She was probably right. That's what hurt the most. "It was good at first, wasn't it? _You saw diagrams, you glowed_..."

 _"That was ET._ You're just a psycho kid."

I clenched my fists, but nothing happened besides me getting red in the face.

Tolmina looked _absolutely fascinated_ by our exchange, propping his chin up in his hand as he watched.

I glared. " _You're_ the nennop. Give me some _advice_."

 _You should have not attacked Charlie or made 'Lori' upset._

" _No duh!_ " I said. " _I asked you for_ advice!"

 _You should have asked me sooner._

I reddened more. _"Well I didn't!_ How do I fix this!"

"Ha!" Lori exclaimed.

Tolmina's response: _I do not know_.

"Idiot!" I muttered. To him, I said, "You suck as a nennop."

 _I do not understand._

"You're terrible as a nennop. I might as well ask _a rock_ for relationship advice."

Tolmina swallowed a lump. _I am sorry. You are right. I'm not a very good nennop._ Looking very depressed, he got up from the table, waddling out the door.

"Gee," said Lori. _"That was mean!"_

Roy suppressed a laugh, tried to look serious in front of Norenio, but he clearly wasn't broken up about the turn of events.

However, Lori was furious. "God, Elliott! Is it your _goal in life_ to make everyone miserable?"

My hands flickered red like flashlights with dying batteries. I figured it was only enough power to fry a couple ants. A silence fell between us.

Nobody really cares that much about plants, which is why I haven't mentioned the fact that the ones we'd been given on the moon had been transported to ET's hut. I wouldn't have even mentioned them now, if not for the fact that, at this particular moment, Meazquad had decided to float my flower over to me.

 _It needs tending._

I watered it then, but when I thought I was done, and left it on a cabinet, it came floating back to me. _Care._

I rolled my eyes. "Me and the plant have nothing to say to each other."

"Allow me." Roy took the flower from me. "Hello, plant, how are you? That's great. My name's Roy. What's yours? Wayne? Well, Wayne, tell me something about yourself." He replied to himself in a falsetto, shaking its leaves. "` _I'm really good at tranquility!'..._ So what's your favorite thing in the whole wide world? `Oh, I dunno, _photosynthesis, I suppose_...'"

Lori smirked, the look on her face saying, 'You are such a dork.'

The video of Pee Wee talking to a glowing green head in a box got interrupted by Yatgibi's image. _Roy Neary, I need Elliott again. The mate can stay where it is, we just need him to finish a project._

"I'm not his mate!" Lori shouted. " _I have a name! I'm my own person!_ "

 _"How do you know he's talking about you?"_ I chided.

Lori visibly reddened. _"Who else could he be talking about? You haven't found someone else_ , that _just happens to be required to work there,_ have you?"

Yatgibi looked annoyed at our bickering. _I require Elliot's services. Send him over immediately._

Roy nodded. "Right away, boss." He shut the communicator down, giving us an apologetic look. "Guess we'll have to take a raincheck on the mall."

Jewish people aren't supposed to eat pork, but a number of us do and feel guilty about it. I only say this because one time I tried to eat a whole bag of pork rinds, and now the thought of helping Yatgibi with his tree gave me that same sludgy flu-like sensation, like I could _feel_ heart disease seeping into my arteries. With much reluctance I got up from the table.

 _"Don't go,"_ ET warned.

"It's a _civic responsibility_ , buddy," Roy said. "Quarjabbe. _He kinda has to_."

ET rubbed his face. "Mudo."

He gave me a warning look and shook his head, but I thought, _`Hey, you drained me of my power. What harm can I really do?'_ In fact, I found the thought... _somewhat relieving._

Lori suddenly didn't look so eager to go to work. I wasn't sure I was either.

She blew a raspberry. "I really...don't want to go back to that place... _with him._ "

That being said, despite not looking super excited to follow me, I still found her behind me when I stepped out the door. I stared.

"Now don't get any ideas. I have to pay my sentence, _I don't want to be beholden to you_ , and I want to _supervise_ so you don't run off or otherwise get in trouble."

I found myself grinning despite myself. She _did_ still care for me in some fashion.

"Oh get that stupid look off your face. I'm still mad at you."

ET had to stay behind and tend his egg, Pabyeba had to go to work...she apparently developed _things_ for their crystal computers, hardware and software. Tolmina had disappeared, Colzest had found a job (and still seemed a little mad about what I did to Charlie anyway) so that left us with Meazquad and Rilquza.

Roy, making it a point to be the good parental guardian, came with, Norenio tagging along to learn human parenting.

Gertie, fearful of abandonment, _had_ to go too.

I got the silent treatment for most of the ride to Yatgibi's place. Instead, Lori sang to herself. _"The reflex is in charge of finding treasure in the dark...And watching over lucky clover, isn't that bizarre?"_

Duran Duran. I don't know if it were because she had a nice singing voice or I just loved her, but I liked it, and wished she hadn't stopped and glared at me when I tried to listen in.

I looked away. Even in the morning, when the sun was shining, you could see the planet's second moon. I stared at it instead of looking at Lori.

Rilquza kept giving Norenio lingering looks and grinning at her.

She, in turn, gave him 'the eye'.

The moment Roy caught them, he was furious. "Hey! _Yukuza!_ Go find yourself someone else! She's taken!"

 _"We are not married,_ " Norenio teased. " _Are you certain I'm taken?"_

The man flushed red. "Dammit, Norenio!"

He sighed, took a deep breath. "I'm going to level with you, honey. I _may have been holding out a little._ Guess I was hoping that, maybe, just _maybe_ a human woman would show up on the planet sometime." He looked pained. "Fine. _I'll marry you._ I think my wife has moved on anyway."

Looking overjoyed, Norenio squeezed his hand, looked Rilquza in the eyes and said, " _Sorry. I am taken._ "

"You think Tolmina will be okay?" Gertie asked Roy. "He seemed to take Elliot's insult pretty hard." She didn't literally say 'He.' I noticed she'd been making an effort to stress the three alien sex pronouns, and _knew_ which specific one Tolmina was. 'The birds and the bees,' I doubted she knew, but she'd learned enough to communicate the difference between `Mister', `Miss', and `Other.'

Roy shrugged. "I'm sure he'll figure it out. He's spent a lifetime with other Qulpari."

Gertie opened her mouth to argue, but he interrupted. " _More than you or I have._ You said he lived on the moon with his friends."

Norenio took out her communication device. "I can call him if you wish."

" _Would you?"_ my sister asked. "I'd appreciate it."

The Abreya pushed some buttons, and the little Qulpari appeared on the screen. "Tolmina, are you well?"

Tolmina gave her a nod. _I am fine._

" _Fine?_ " Lori repeated. " _Seriously_? A live in _psychologist_ , supposedly in touch with your feelings, and _that's_ what you're going with? _You just ran off! You are clearly not fine!_ Where are you anyway?"

It seemed she had said the wrong things. Instead of answering, he said, _Nowhere. I am fine. I am going on a journey. I will be back. Please do not worry about me._

And he disconnected himself from her computer. I couldn't resist getting in a jab. " _Nice, Lori._ Real nice."

" _What!_ He wouldn't be off sulking if it wasn't for you!"

Roy have his alien girlfriend a sideways glance, like there was something he wanted to say but wasn't sure he should. "Look, uh, like I said, _I think he'll be fine._ Maybe he's just going off to do some research on how to be a nennop. _Or looking for a better job!_ Not everyone is cut out to be a relationship counselor. Heck, I wanted to be a race car driver and a marine biologist and a cowboy when I was little, but _when you go out into the world, you learn your limitations._ Am I right or am I right?"

"Cowboy is not a nennop," said Norenio. I guess they must have discussed those a few times.

"I know," he sighed. "My point is that people generally excel in maybe just a couple things. They can either work in that field or do an easier job, what is called 'entry level.' When I found out I couldn't be Roy Rogers, I was sad too. I mean, hey, _I was named after the guy._ "

Norenio squeezed his hand. "I will find you another nennop."

"No rush," he groaned.

"Can you tell Tolmina we still love him?" Gertie asked. "And not to hurt himself? I don't want him to jump off a bridge or anything."

"Yes." Norenio pushed some buttons on her device. "The message is sent."

When we arrived at Yatgibi's factory, I got greeted with much excitement.

 _Elliott!_ The alien said. _How good it is that you have arrived so promptly! We are nearing the end of our project! Hurry! Let us go to the door at once!_

Again that sludgy unpleasant feeling coursed through me. I followed with reluctance.

"Wait," Lori called. "What about me? What do _I_ do?"

Yatgibi ignored her. It seemed he didn't care.

The alien and his companions had done their very best to expand the cracks in the earthquake-like fissure I'd started, the damage radiating outward in spider web patterns.

Yatgibi and his buddies gathered around the door, glowing red hands pressed to the wood, but nothing was happening. I _really_ didn't want to help.

My boss, noticing my reluctance, pointed angrily at the door. _Don't just stand there! Help us with this thing!_

I did what was asked, but only to humor him. I laid my hands on the bark, my thoughts naturally gravitating toward the hurt, resentment and self loathing I felt, but my hands only _flickered_ , weak bursts jolting out from my fingers like I had merely scuffed my feet on a carpet and touched a door knob.

Despite the feeble showing of power, I still saw stars and blacked out like I'd been given the sleeper hold.

 _Get back up!_ Yatgibi growled in annoyance. _What is wrong with you!_

I explained what ET did to me. "Couldn't we get an _axe_ or some other sharp object and just _cut our way in?_ We've _made a dent in it!_ "

He scowled at me like I were an idiot. _Don't you think we already tried that?_ The moment _any blade_ touches that section of the tree, the vines and bark regrow themselves, oftentimes twice as strongly as before! Get back on your feet. We're going to try something.

I got ordered to press my hands to the tree once more.

I glanced back and saw I had an audience. Meazquad, Rilquza and Norenio taking in the scene with suspicion and puzzlement, Meazquad more suspicious than the others. Lori and Roy looked... _indifferent_.

One of Yatgibi's staff guys hurriedly ushered the group back into the building.

One of Yatgibi's associates, for reasons unknown to me, had brought out something that looked a lot like _trash_. Admittedly, not earth trash, but something that _resembled_ styrofoam and other waste products, if an extraterrestrial had been running the molding machines. He poured flammable liquids on these, set them on fire, so that black smoke wreathed the sealed door, and I could scarcely breathe without coughing.

Yatgibi muttered something to his companions, and I suddenly experienced a pain, like I'd been slugged in the stomach.

I felt a burning sensation, but it wasn't as powerful as the one I roasted Charlie with. Rather, it felt like being slapped by everyone in the world.

There's a certain feeling you get when watching movies about criminals, especially near the end when everything is in slow motion and the sad music plays. The movie makes you feel like the cops are wrong, but there's nothing the guy can do about it because there's so many of them and they have guns. Yet you still kinda want him to fight back and leave the cops with a few scars, make them pay for what they did. The injustice of 'Might equals right,' even though you already know the crook had it coming, you want him to get a few hits in, maybe even get a little upset when he just gives up like a sane rational person. `Unjust justice,' I guess you'd call it.

Imagine someone distilled that emotion to its purest state, separate from external stimuli (such as the movie I described) and stuck a syringe full of the stuff into your arm. That's what it felt like when Yatgibi's friends put their hands on me.

Compiled with this, I felt the sensation of bullying, _being the bully_ , like, for example, if you talked to a schizophrenic in such a way that their madness got _worse_ \- like saying you're one of the voices in their head, so they try to attack you. It reminded me of picking a scab. _Chickens_ pick scabs like that - it often ends with a dead chicken.

It was the same addictive scab picking impulse that made me reach down into some darkened corner of myself and draw out... _energy._

It felt like grabbing a downed power line with your bare hands, and just as stupid. With an angry scream, I pushed my palms against the wood, and it exploded like windows in a _Highlander_ decapitation scene, splinters, sawdust and wood fragments flying every which way.

My ear slug _liquified_ , its dead remains oozing from my ear canal like room temperature ocean water during a sweltering day at the beach. It almost felt like part of my ear melting away.

Again I felt like I had a stomach full of pork rinds or bland cheesy corn, that dull, queasy feeling I couldn't easily shake.

Yatgibi and his friends cheered, slapped me on the back, and for a moment I felt elation, possibly even a little joy amidst all the negative emotion.

Of course, now I also felt guilt.

Meazquad had joined us on the platform, staring in horror at the open door. "What have you done!" I understood this only due to constant exposure to the Qulpari language.

I would have replied, but I was still squinting through the cloud of sawdust at the tree's darkened interior, trying to see what I'd uncovered.

A pair of glowing eyes stared back at us from the shadows.

As the dust cleared, I began to see _objects_ in the darkness veiled hollow of the tree. It _was_ , in fact, a tomb.

Objects appearing to be burial vaults pitted its walls, as in a mausoleum, and amid a huge tangle of vines and root like growths stood three wood and glass coffins, one of them wide open. _That_ was where the thing with the glowing eyes sat staring. It did not speak, it just stared.

The vines connected to its coffin and the others in a way that suggested _life support systems_. In another inky recess I spotted what appeared to be a massive taxidermy animal, like a pterodactyl that had somehow survived the ice age enough to receive a stuffing and formaldehyde treatment, maybe after breeding with a few oversized dragonflies first.

Nearby, in a dim corner, I noticed a _machine_ , dirty, rusted, but clearly some sort of vehicle, its design reminding me of a jet ski and a motorcycle. Well, if a _demon_ had built it.

The creature in the open coffin looked like an average but pale Qulpari. Even the red glow, at first, appeared to be a trick of the light. His smile was disarming as he cracked lips, likely shriveled from disuse, and spoke for the first time.

"Your power has impressed me, young alien." The dialect was strangely archaic, but I understood it, for some reason. "I may have a place for you in my army."

" _Army?_ " I stammered. I hadn't heard ET say that Qulpari word at all, but I'd picked it up _somewhere_ apparently.

The alien smirked. " _I have plans to make changes to the_ _Woznasne_ _Sevitgap."_

"I don't know what that is."

His smirk broadened into a grin. "Let's just say they're a _very nasty group of individuals_ that have been _repressing freedoms_ for a long time, and we're working to overthrow them from power. _We could use someone of your talent_ to assist us in that end."

I furrowed my brow. "Wait, you've been trapped inside a tree for _who knows how long_ , and I'm just supposed to believe all that? How do you know... _those people are still alive?_ "

I don't know how he understood me. Maybe he had an ancient ear slug, maybe I'd unconsciously speaking Qulpari, or maybe he had telepathic abilities. Whatever the reason, I caused him to laugh. "I was not as insulated as you might think. I can _read the tree_. Its vines also conduct sound. Although I despise this prison to the very core of my being, it is also a _tool._ Plus _my devoted servants have been keeping me informed of current events by speaking into the places where sound travels._ "

"You're... _Sovirox_ , aren't you?"

He nodded.

"You've been stuck here for what, _decades?_ How are you still alive?"

"I have _you_ to thank for that. The tree, at first, provided me with nutrients, but then it started to break down my internal organs - it was only due to your... _power_ that it released me from this living burial." I got a sense that he meant _my hate_ freed him, but he intentionally avoided the word.

The stranger climbed out of the coffin, rested on the floor like he didn't have the power to stand. "Servants. Bring me food and drink before I perish."

The order resulted in a flurry of activity, Yatgibi and associates practically falling over each other to appease the stranger, bowls of milk, caviar like eggs the size of marbles, something like chicken.

Sovirox rose to his feet, gesturing to me. "Come here, young alien. There are things I want to show you. Let's talk, up close."

"Don't go in there, Elliott!" Meazquad shouted. "It's a trap!"

The moment I turned to look, ET's mate shot up in the air, and some unseen force twisted his neck around until it snapped. He collapsed dead on the wooden planks.

My eyes filled with tears. "Meazquad! No!"

Now I knew the terrible truth. That same evil energy that helped Dad swear a bolt loose actually damned the bolt, made it an object of suffering and misery. I'm not speaking literally, of course, but metaphorically. Whatever momentary gains you may have achieved are spoiled, ruined by your hate and defiling language, and that's what it felt like.

Dad swore at a bolt, a few days later, mom divorced him. Sure, there were other reasons, but it sure didn't help.

And now this evil energy had wrought death.

Though my vision blurred, I could make out the killer: My employer. A vengeful rage boiled inside me when our eyes met.

"Yatgibi you fool!" Sovirox yelled. "You did it too soon!"

My hatred had been directed at Yatgibi, but now it shifted to his master.

I glared at Sovirox, fists clenched and glowing red. "Too soon?" I snarled. " _Too soon!_ You mean you had this planned all along?"

I stomped closer, but a sob kept creeping into my voice. "You bastard! I'm going to send you back into that coffin!"

Sovirox beckoned me closer. "That's right, alien, _go ahead and try it_." The smile on his face told me I would be playing right into his hands.

I forced myself not to attack. Instead, I gave him the finger.

Instead of being insulted, Sovirox looked _puzzled._ "Is that gesture supposed to mean something?"

My hands flared red again. " _You're going to pay for this_ , you son of a bitch!" Again my threat sounded wimpy. I actually felt helpless, on the verge of tears.

The alien only laughed like I'd told the world's funniest joke, opening the coffin adjacent to his. "Yatgibi, bring that carcass over here. My mate must be restored."

 _That carcass!_ How I hated him for saying that!

"Yes, master."

I stared as Yatgibi used his telekinetic powers to float my dead friend's body to the open coffin.

My puzzlement turned to horror when I saw rotting tendrils of fungus stretching out of the wood and glass container to grab the victim.

"Stop!" I shouted, causing my hands to glow once more. "I won't let you do this!"

But they _were_ doing it. Already Yatgibi had released Meazquad's corpse, the fungus engulfing his flesh.

 _"Or what?"_ Sovirox mocked. _"You'll cry at me?"_

I could hold back my anger no more.

I raised my hands, blasting the fungus coffin in the same way I'd attacked Charlie earlier. Instead of burning up and releasing my friend's body, it grew _stronger_ , swallowing the victim completely.

A second later, a tentacle like growth shot out, sucking Yatgibi into the coffin with a scream. I don't think the fungus had any issues with him, it was just hungry. I got some satisfaction out of this turn of events, but it wasn't enough.

I now directed my rage at Sovirox. I wanted to hurt him the same way he hurt Meazquad. So, unwise as it might seem, my temper got the best of me and I fired at him with both hands.

I guess I thought I could send him to meet his friend in the fungus coffin, but it didn't play out that way. Sovirox only smiled and spread his arms like he were sunbathing.

And then, when I put my hands down, he raised his own, the red energy continuing to pour out of me.

 _"Moron!"_ He barked. That's not a literal translation, but the Qulpari word had a similar meaning. _"Where do you think the majority of that power came from! I'm_ the one who sensed _you_ on the other side of the door! I'm the one who imbued you with power! I _brought_ you here last night. Your mind is _absurdly simple_ to control!"

I guess he was just flattering me when he said I had power. I paled in terror. _"You_ made me _sleepwalk?"_

 _"I'm going to make you do more than that, you simpleton."_

Now colored a devil's red, his hands grabbed hold of both beams of energy, drew them in like rope on a boat anchor.

My body felt weak. I lost control of my footing, stumbled forward as if pulled by an invisible lasso.

I bowed my head, looked away from him, relaxed my fingers, but that did nothing to remove the evil energy. It only resulted in me being dragged further across the boards.

I dropped and grabbed a slat, digging my nails in the wood, but then it was like I were reenacting a scene from _Poltergeist_ , my legs flying up in the air as I fought against unseen forces trying to drag me into the abyss.

"You leave my brother alone!" I heard my sister shout.

"Gertie don't!" I yelled, but already she was rushing to my aid, hands outstretched, wizard-like.

There was something like an explosion. I saw a flash of light, and my body smashed through a wooden railing, flying off the platform. I tumbled upside down through the air.

A cloud of black smoke erupted from the platform, like a dragon belching with a mouthful of coal. A vast reptilian shape emerged from the ashen cloud, spreading its wings before a twin moon in a way that reminded me of the Bat Symbol.

My feet flipped over my head, and I caught sight of the ground rushing up to meet me.

I'm going to die, I'm going to die. That was the thought that kept repeating in my mind.


	34. Chapter 34: Infection

The first time someone had thrown me off of an alien tree, I had a group of ET's friends standing by to help me. At the tree of my enemy, I couldn't hope to have such luck again.

In a moment of calm, pondering what Roger Moore would do in my situation, I wished for a parachute, then, as I thought about it a second more, I came to the sudden realization that Norenio _had_ actually shown me a parachute like feature on my outfit.

I pulled the rings and the glider cape popped out. Unfortunately, being untrained in the art of skydiving, it caused me to go into a tailspin, flipping my body end over and end like a quarter. I threw up in my mouth a little.

I somersaulted, struck the roof of a hut. Not the comfortable thatched grass you'd expect.

I rolled, fell through a glass roof.

Below me lay one of those jacuzzi things that Qulpari love so much. Steam and weird musky scents filled the humid air, streams of condensation dripping down the walls into the thick sod flooring.

I flipped over again, splashing down in oozing glop the color and consistency of pea soup.

I struggled to the surface, trying not to think about the squirming caviar like... _objects_ beneath my feet.

I snatched air, the slime burning my eyes when I opened them.

Once my vision cleared, I found my nose practically touching the face of a Qulpari with a mouthful of eggs.

Worse, I recognized him, he was my zookeeper, the one who had examined me during my imprisonment. Well, I suppose he deserved this.

I bet he would have yelled at me had his mouth not been busy with baby making activities. Presently, he could only sputter a little and glare at me. I think he swallowed an egg or two.

 _His companions_ , though...

The Qulpari that had captured me in a bubble when I first arrived on Jufuceri...she was growling and yelling about how I were more disgusting than what she'd heard, you know, from our visit to the Nisweku registration place.

Little wonder how _she_ got that news, Izrigma the yernar representative was the third person in their sogwuba. I raised a pair of sticky hands, apologizing profusely as I accidentally crushed a few of their eggs beneath my feet. "I'm really sorry. It wasn't my idea, I didn't mean to interrupt, sorry."

I quickly scrambled out of their egg tub, dripping slime into the grass flooring. As the aliens continued to voice their upset, I thought about Meazquad and broke into sobs.

None of the aliens knew what to do with _that_. If I'd merely been apologetic, or angry, or laughing at the situation, they probably would have kept yelling, but _crying?_ I think they couldn't decide whether to feel sorry for me or dismiss me as a weird kid being petulant about them not including me in their little bath party.

In a hurry to save myself some embarrassment, I flung open the nearest door, but it turned out to be a storage closet containing pool cleaning supplies, egg warming pads and the type of mystifying bedroom objects I'd seen in paintings at the Nisweku center. I opened another door, but it was like a bad dream, the room it lead to didn't take me outside, just a bedroom where the goose like lab helper from the zoo dozed in the corner, head nuzzled in its downy chest. Its eyes opened drowsily as I crept in for a fruitless search for an exit, then crept back out. The aliens, still very much upset, pointed to a third door, and _that one_ actually led somewhere.

The first thing I noticed when I came outside was a smiling one eyed winged porpoise flitting past the balcony, which clicked at me, darting off on its merry way.

Although overgrown with ivy, the place looked _nicer_ than ET's neighborhood. I stood on a balcony decorated with ornate stained glass and pillars. Even the ivy seemed like an _accent_. Over the rail, I could see a strange building that reminded me of something out of Mister Roger's puppet land. It had a design like a stereo, with a circular rotating piece resembling the Jefferson memorial, lit by changing colored lights.

In search of a way back to my friends, I followed the balcony to my left, wandering along for several yards until I spotted a section of the tree. Seeing it made me think I'd neared the flying machines. I quickened my pace.

"Elliott!" a voice hissed.

I looked up and saw a wriggling piscine shape flying down from a section higher on the tree. I rushed to meet him. "Charlie!"

It seems I was too loud. I saw him visibly cringe, and a moment after I cried out his name, a flood of black water came pouring down the bark of the tree, then gallons of foul smelling clumpy liquid the consistency of pancake syrup.

The substance moved quickly, in a way that hinted at _intelligence_. And then _tentacles_ and worm like... _lifeforms_ came reaching for me.

"Run, Elliott!" Charlie yelled.

I did what he said.

A few backwards glances told me our fears were not unjustified. The black ooze quickly consolidated into a large, Qulpari shaped figure that slurmed along with surprising speed.

As you can probably guess, my winged costume, with the additional weight of um, _alien pea soup_ , provided a lot of drag. I tried to cinch the thing back up, but that only slowed me down further, gave the abominable thing behind me opportunity to close the gap between us.

...Whatever it was, it had flesh cow splotched a solid black and sickly gray, and wore a large mushroom-like 'Coolie hat' that would have been comical, had the monstrosity possessed actual eyes in its dripping eye sockets. Although slightly winded, I forced myself to run faster.

I raced past the hut with the broken skylight, nearly trampling Izrigma in my haste to escape. _The thing wasn't after him, it was after me._ I kept going.

I paused to catch my breath, having gained a fair distance on the monster, but then I heard a low growling sound, and that motorcycle thing from Sovirox's prison came rumbling down through the air after me, spouting clouds of smog so thick and oily that my eyes watered and I couldn't breathe without coughing.

I ran away from the thing and its malevolent, zombie like pilot, but of course that's when the 'mushroom man' came for me.

I froze in the middle of the balcony, stared out at the rotating Jefferson memorial, mentally prepared myself to jump off the side.

The moment I climbed up on the rail, I saw _Sovirox_ slowly descending from above like Superman, but radiating an unfriendly red glow.

Before I could make any attempt to defend myself, the floating Qulpari waved his hands, and the red energy yanked me forcefully off the edge.

I went sailing toward him, hovered before his face in the air as he drained the energy out of me.

The alien's glow burned brighter and brighter, like charcoal on a fire, but I only felt weak, like a vampire were sucking all the strength and vitality out of my soul.

Once Sovirox had weakened me to the point of passing out, he used his power to hurl me back into the balcony, smashing through stained glass, into the waiting arms of the fungus creature. The nasty black and white thing reached out to me with its tendrils, slowly engulfing me. It felt like my skin was rotting away.

The last thing I saw before completely blacking out was a giant bird leg stomping down in front of me, flattening broken bits of balcony railing beneath its massive scaly claw.

I awoke to the wind blowing through my hair, and downy feathers tickling my face. Someone had slung me, like a sack of potatoes, over the back of an enormous bird, something with broad pig's ears and a wattle like a turkey.

"No-ey baby, you are a bird ninja, _and a chef_. I'm _glad_ I decided to marry you!"

I lay sprawled along the thing's neck, above the horn of a saddle, a strange two seater construct that looked like it belonged on a motorcycle, but fit around bird wings. Roy took the secondary seat because Norenio had the reigns, and me.

I gasped in horror. The ground lay hundreds of feet below us, only the bird's huge wings keeping us up in the air. I fixed my eyes on the fuzzy down. "Gertie," I groaned.

"She's... _safe_ ," Roy muttered, his tone of voice hinting that all was not well.

I would have probed deeper, but this wasn't a great time for full conversation. "Where are we going?"

Roy glanced over his shoulder. " _Away from those things._ You need a doctor to check you out. I think you've got some broken bones, and I don't like what Mister Funguy did to your skin."

"Elliott!" Charlie flitted down and nuzzled me in the face.

"Careful, Charlie," Roy warned. "He might have something contagious, we're going to see a doctor."

"Hmm," the flying Qulpari replied.

 _"Lori..._ " I moaned.

"She's fine. _Colgate took her somewhere safe._ "

"What about _those things?_ Are we far enough away from them yet?"

Roy glanced back again. " _Sort of._ There's sort of an _anemone_ _forest-_ "

I sucked in my breath as a mass of anemone the thickness of tree branches battered us on all sides like brushes in an automatic car wash. I nearly fell off the bird as it shoved its way through. I felt like a clownfish. I probably would have enjoyed the dazzling rainbow of blues reds and purples, had they not been slapping against me, trying to throw me from my ride.

These 'anemone trees' made music when their limbs brushed each other, in the same way wind chimes make music-just barely. They sounded like violins, but only did three notes: low C, D and E. In other words, `Frere jaque, jaque ere fre, jaque Frere.' I got struck again, came dangerously close to sliding off.

 _"You might want to sit up on_ Vadful's neck," Roy suggested. "The anemone below us might soften your fall, but it might not."

 _"Gee, thanks for the pep talk!_ " I grumbled, shakily adjusting my position. The bird mooed in protest, acting like it wanted to shake me off, but Norenio spoke to it in soothing tones until it calmed down.

The macrodactyla gave way to regular looking forests, well, _regular-ish_ , again, they were huge trees with buildings on them, and the trees smelled strongly of new car interiors, some kind of unusual chemicals secreted by the trees and their leaves, like a pine tree does. Large clusters of lianas hung down from some of the boughs, reminding me of Sovirox's prison.

We approached a structure resembling half a seahorse stuck to an upside down chandelier. "What's that place?"

"It's like a hospital. Your sister's there, but I want you to get a checkup before you go to visit. That mold stuff doesn't look very good for your health."

Noting how our 'winged steed' was currently foaming at the mouth, I remarked, "Maybe Vadful should get a checkup too. She looks sick."

"It's a _he_ , Elliott. And that's how it sweats. He's, well, _healthy as a horse_."

The bird flapped down on the hospital grounds, shaking its feathers and wiggling its crocodile tail.

As Roy and Norenio helped me to the ground, the creature barked like a dog, prompting Norenio to give it bits of fruit and squeezes from a water bottle. It licked her in the face.

"Cmon, kid," Roy urged, leading me toward the building.

For a moment, I felt secure in my footing, and Roy let me walk ahead.

I expected a crowd around this `hospital' comparable to the one at the Nisweku center, but it seemed Qulpari were very efficient with their medical procedures. For one thing, their ability to levitate objects came in handy when transporting the injured. They didn't need a special emergency entrance, they just floated the stretcher over the other Qulpari's heads. `Rubbernecking' also appeared to be a human custom. Instead of standing around and getting in the way, the Qulpari either helped out or respectfully moved to the side whenever faced with an inbound victim.

According to Roy, something called `triage' was different, too. On earth you had a `triage nurse' that decided which patients in an emergency room got treated first, gunshot wounds and other gruesome stuff generally at the top of the list, hypochondriacs, people who fake illnesses for sympathy, at the bottom. The Qulpari still did that, of course, but they also had a little counseling center they referred the malingerers to. The triage nurse would press their fingers to the patient's head, sensing the kind of pain they felt, and they'd just point to the counseling center if there weren't any real injuries or illnesses to treat. Sometimes a counselor would stroll over and say hi before they even got to that point. I even saw them doing this outside in the `parking lot.' Roy said this saved their hospitals lots of money, especially when it came to drug related problems. On earth, these situations couldn't be managed and sometimes patients would even steal supplies or engineer ways to get more drugs because nobody helped them emotionally.

Also, they had `satellite' buildings around the main complex that served the function of `family practice' or `local practitioner' that kept people from using the emergency room as a catch-all for things that a hospital shouldn't be wasting its time treating, like the common cold.

And then, of course, a lot of surgeries and such weren't even necessary because of mystical powers like I used to have. In fact, it made their system of triage go in a different order, the real issue was keeping the wounded, bleeding, and seriously ill stabilized until the healers recovered their energy for another round.

Another thing that helped: Nobody was coming in pregnant. The Qulpari and Abreyas both laid eggs, no umbilical cords, none of that tricky stuff that normally caused babies and mothers to die during a procedure. I heard they still occasionally had a dud egg, _or couldn't make eggs_ , sometimes the egg got trapped inside their bodies, or the baby might have birth defects that needed to be treated, but in general, they didn't need any help getting the baby out. I imagine that made for lighter street traffic too.

This was, of course, a lot of word of mouth, since I hadn't even reached the interior yet.

I could see now that the 'arms' of the 'chandelier' were actually towers covered in windows. That's the last real thing I noticed before I fainted and fell on the pavement.

I didn't get to see the lobby or anything. I awoke naked in a sort of tanning bed, with an IV stuck in my arm. Well, not exactly stuck, they somehow had a method of giving me fluids intravenously without breaking the skin with needles. They also didn't need IV stands to drip things in, a small device next to me pumped it in. It would have worked in zero gravity.

Someone had coated me in foaming chemicals, probably the same kind of stuff they put in athlete's foot spray.

"How much longer will he have to be in there?" Roy was asking someone.

"It could be a few hours," came the reply. "The fungus has to dry out of his system." By 'it' the doctor meant _me_. "The infection went very deep. If the heat and _wixrigar_ does its job correctly, he should come to a quick recovery and leave in the morning. I expect it will be very thirsty when it gets out."

I glanced down and discovered they were drying me out in more ways than one. I had equipment attached so I could...'evacuate' without making a mess.

I slept because there wasn't anything else for me to do in there. When I awoke again, I was parched and had to lay like that for about a half hour before the 'tanning bed' opened up.

To my surprise, I saw _Lori_ leaning over me, and looking rather happy to see me.

"Lori!" I cried. _"You're all right!"_

"Yeah," she stammered. "Glad to see you're okay." She shoved a cup of water into my hands. "Here. Drink this." With a look of embarrassment, quickly turned her back to me. I thought I saw her chest glowing. Colzest, who watched nearby, grinned at us. I think both he and Charlie were pleased that I'd made a fair recovery.

"I was worried about you," Lori said. "I seriously thought you died."

The water kinda tasted like lime Gatorade with broccoli and celery in it. Not the most delicious thing in the world, but I was thirsty, so I guzzled it. "How'd you get away from those guys? They almost killed me."

 _"I'm good at hiding._ It sounds like Soversocks and his buddies were too busy trying to kill you to bother about me." She sighed. "I'm sorry, I probably should've tried to help you. I guess I'm just a big chicken."

"Better than being a big jerk," I said. "I don't blame you, considering how I've been acting. I wish I could blame it all on Sovirox. I mean, he _was_ messing with my mind, _but I don't know..._ "

Still not looking at me, she passed my clothes back to me, now seeming to have been washed and dry cleaned. "Put these on. They've been sterilized."

"Thanks..." I frowned at the toilet equipment. "So I'm done? I can get out?"

"Yeah. I think so. Get dressed."

The IV thing _had_ been removed, so I did what she said. As I zipped up my outfit, she remarked, "You look nice with a tan. You needed some color."

 _My face_ colored a little at her comment.

Assuming we were done, I climbed out of the machine.

The place resembled a home rather than a hospital ward. The room was round, held a bunch of jamassi ( jellyfish beds).

I stumbled, nearly pitched onto the floor, but Lori caught me.

Somehow I ended up awkwardly in a swooning pose like a woman would do during the Tango. She giggled a little, helping me to walk.

"Let's find my sister," I sighed.

We found Gertie, but she didn't look good at all. The parts of her body that weren't badly scarred looked pale, rotten with mold, or had an unusually greenish cast. Her breathing was shallow, her pupils milky white.

She lay on a translucent jamassi, IV tubes feeding her nutrients and medication. A secondary system performed a sort of dialysis. The healers around her looked at us apologetically. The expressions on their faces told us there was nothing more they could do.

ET looked at me sadly from one side of the bed.

"Like I said, kid," Roy muttered behind me. _"She's safe._ Wish I had better news than that."

My sister shivered, and it wasn't even cold in there. "Elliott, is that you?"

I felt so emotional, I could barely get the words out.

She reached out to me with a shaking pale green hand, gave me a faint smile. I noticed she still wore that stupid Ridvucha bracelet. "I saved you."

"Y-yes you did."

My sister closed her eyes, her face going slack. Her arm dropped limply to her side.

I clutched her hand. "Gertie!"

She didn't respond.

"Gertie! Speak to me!"

She didn't.

A light suddenly flashed on her bracelet.

She'd actually found someone.

Sadly, she wouldn't be able to enjoy the company.


	35. Chapter 35: Sofeiwa

With tears in my eyes, I half ran, half stumbled up to my alien friend. "Please, ET! Isn't there something you can do to help her?"

Vorxora hesitated before answering, looking very depressed. I couldn't tell if this were because of Meazquad, or if he truly had no hope for my sister. "I have heard rumors, but it is a sofeiwa." The word seemed to imply gambling, the closest earth equivalent probably being `long shot.'

"Would it be any worse than what we're doing here?"

ET bowed his head. "I do not know."

Hearing a faint cough, I glanced at my sister. It turned out she still breathed, but just barely. I silently wondered how she'd rescued me from Sovirox, but she was in no condition to explain. "We've _got_ to do something! If there's a chance we can save Gertie, even a small one, we need to try it. It's obvious your doctors have done all they can here...what's your... _sofeiwa_?"

ET took a deep breath. "There are legends of a great tribe of healers living in the Nolgaci ruins. It would be a long, dangerous journey through Mavdamar jungle. Many have died trying to find them. Some say the Latogapa does not exist, that all the healers have died long ago...But I _still do_ hear stories of miraculous healings."

"You're not going," Roy growled. "It's suicide. I know you love your sister... _God knows I love her too_ , but I still think these doctors can come up with a cure."

ET didn't look so sure, and neither did one of the doctors.

"Look, _sometimes a person is just too far gone_ , and if medical science can't figure it out, no amount of wishful thinking or Voodoo witchdoctoring is going to change..." He let out a heavy sigh, shook his head. "I'm sorry. I know that's not what you want to hear..." He turned his back to us, leaned against a wall, sniffed and wiped his eyes. " _Great job, Roy, breaking kid's hearts._ Now I know what the highway patrolman feels like."

Norenio gave him a sympathetic puppy dog whimper, wrapped her arms around him. She nuzzled close, whispered things in his ear.

"Honey, a man has to be strong for his family."

She muttered something else.

 _"And how do we know that's not just a fairy tale?_...On my planet there are _con artists_ that stick bloody parts of animals on people and act like they're reaching into their bodies and healing them of cancers and things. _People come from miles around, but it's just a money making trick._ I had a _boss_ that died because of that. _He refused to see an actual doctor-_ "

"This isn't earth," Norenio interrupted.

"No-ey, do you know who _Don Quixote_ is? _Baron Munchhausen?_ "

She blinked rapidly, indicating she hadn't.

He started to sing the theme to _Man Of La Mancha_ , then stopped when it didn't help. "It's a wild goose chase. We're not going to find anything."

"How do you know?" she asked.

After a long thoughtful pause, Roy marched up to ET and said, " _Do you have an actual map?"_

Gertie's doctors were nice enough to provide us with a padded sort of 'litter' to carry her with, equipped with heater, IV solution, oxygen concentrator and other life support equipment. The white egg shaped machine somehow floated in the air like a hovercraft.

"Hi! Which one of you is Gertie?" someone asked as we were leaving the building.

Shocked to hear anyone speaking my native tongue so fluently, I glanced down and became even more shocked. A little curly haired brunette boy, about Gertie's age, had just randomly strolled out of nowhere, bearing a stuffed raccoon and a Sony Walkman. A glowing marble dangled from a chain around his neck, the apparent match to Gertie's bracelet.

"I'm sorry," Roy coughed. " _This really isn't a good time._ "

The boy didn't go away. Instead, he stared at Lori, hands nervously fidgeting in the pockets of his leather jacket. "Are _you_ Gertie?"

She shook her head. "I admit you're cute, but you're way too young for me."

The kid furrowed his brow, giving me a questioning look like she were joking.

"That's not her."

The stranger gazed at the floating egg. "What's that you got in there?"

 _"Gertie,_ " Lori sighed.

"She's very sick."

He looked hopeful. "Can I...see her?"

I glanced at Roy.

The man shook his head. "There's too much of a contamination risk."

The boy was crushed. "I'm sorry...I just thought, after going to _the place_ and _finding I'm not the only human being on the planet_ , and even _matched together_ with a _weirdly desperate non male companion_ , you might not be jerks. _Guess I was wrong._ "

Roy wasn't having it. "What part of ` _sick_ ' do you not understand?"

The boy suddenly looked depressed. " _She's dead, isn't she?_ "

"No, but we're in a hurry to help her."

"I wanna help," the boy blurted.

 _"Kid , where are your parents?"_

"I don't have any."

"Great. Just what I need. _Another orphan._ "

The boy leaned over the litter. "Can I see what all the fuss is about?"

Roy still looked hesitant. " _Gee, I dunno..._ "

Norenio said something to him about helping Gertie heal, and cheering her up.

"I probably shouldn't, but _I guess a quick glance wouldn't hurt..._ "

The moment the lid to Gertie's vehicle opened, a whole range of emotions flickered across the boy's face, excitement at the prospect of a new playmate, admiration of the beauty that illness and injury still hadn't touched, then pity at her miserable condition, and finally disappointment at how Ill she was and barely even noticed him. He muttered something about how this was "Like his mother all over again."

The lid came closed again. "What happened?"

 _"Long story."_

The kid wasn't the only one following us around. Someone apparently forgot to hitch up our large avian friend, and now it was hovering over Gertie's egg, poking it with its beak. Roy shooed it away, but it didn't seem to understand, mooing in protest.

 _"Back, you dumb Lummox!"_

"Maybe it thinks it's a baby," Lori suggested.

And then we heard faint knocking from within the egg.

With a sigh, Roy opened the egg again.

The bird sniffed deeply, stared at my sister, then jerked back in surprise when she reached for him and started coughing.

Roy rubbed her forehead. _"You need to rest, Gertie."_

"Where are we going?" she croaked.

"To see a _specialist._ A special doctor. Just relax and get some rest."

She squirmed on the cushions, squinting at the boy. _"Who's that?"_

Roy chuckled softly. "Don't get too excited, but I think you have a boyfriend."

The moment they made eye contact, her eyes watered and she had to close her eyelids.

She smirked. "He...looks nice."

"Let's, uh, _work on you resting getting well for the time being_ , and talk about the romantic stuff later."

Gertie looked like she disagreed, but then, after a coughing fit, gave him a reluctant nod and pushed something that made the lid close again.

ET _did_ have a map, plotted out on his electronic device, though I could clearly see a multitude of gaps and blank areas in the topography. Only the first leg of our voyage seemed to be clearly defined with one hundred percent certainty.

"My name's Pete," the boy called as he trailed behind us. "Peter Quill. I've been living with a Qulpari for six months. He was _real happy_ that I found other people of my kind. He's been single for a long time. He got really embarrassed about bringing me to _the place_ , well, _until we found out about you!_ Is it okay if I live with you guys? Things are going to get _awkward_ between me and Yizewo if I keep hanging out. _He's got two new friends_ , if you catch my drift... _Actually, it's already been awkward._ They don't like it when I talk to them when they're in the soupy stuff, trying to make babies, but the tub is right on the way to the toilet...That green stuff isn't soup, by the way. It's totally gross. They get _real upset_ when you try to eat it, too. You know what I'm talking about, _the green stuff?_ In the tub?"

"Kid," Roy said. "You talk too much."

ET summoned a craft for us, a vehicle that looked like an acorn with maple helicopter seed wings. Its interior, though larger than the typical treetop flying machine, didn't allow for much more than our bodies and Gertie's litter. I could touch the ceiling with my hands, and Roy and Norenio couldn't get situated without bending over. Our giant avian friend tried to join us, but we had to shoo it away, it couldn't even fit through the door.

Since Pete kept asking, we gave him the details about what happened to Gertie, well, what we could piece together.

Our craft flew through forested areas, to a region thickly populated with massive clusters of pillar and elkhorn coral, ranging in sizes smaller than houses to taller than the empire state building. They pulsed with an eerie inner light, in Day Glo blues, oranges and purples, sometimes in a white or gold color.

It didn't look like the friendliest place to land, but we descended within a clearing surrounded by oversized brain coral.

"Hey neat!" Peter said. "What are we doing here?"

"Trying to find a doctor," I sighed.

We didn't expect to have anyone greeting us at this secluded, unpopular region of the planet, but the moment we climbed out, I noticed we had a _welcoming party._

First of all, we already knew that Vadful was following us, we'd seen him flying around the windows. A couple of times he made us nervous by tapping on the glass with his beak, but mostly he remained well behaved, leaving our vehicle undamaged, though he came close to stomping us in his excitement the moment we landed.

And then _Tolmina_ stepped out into the clearing with a couple _new friends_ , apparently not the romantic type either.

The first was a stranger we'd never seen before, an Abreya with a face like a pacman frog and a long gray dress, the other companion: Our pale friend spike.

"Hey little guy!" Roy called cheerfully. " _I was_ _just wondering where you'd run off to!_ How'd you find us?"

Tolmina pointed to ET.

Roy frowned at the Abreya. "...Who's this?"

"I have found you two nennops," Tolmina explained. "Tiffrid is a certified _Sapelam_ from the _Pemgurm_. He has heard my stories of difficulty, and is open to a challenge."

Roy's face flushed red with anger. "So now you're blabbing my private information to random strangers? How dare you!"

I didn't often see Qulpari blush, but Tolmina's skin _did_ change a different color at this moment. "The information was given in the utmost confidence and confidentiality required of all Sapelam nennops at his level. He understands that he cannot share the information with anyone else outside our _Luherra._ "

Roy still looked skeptical. And angry. " _And what about your other friend?"_

"Vukvuzan has sworn kedoonk, as official nennop for... _Elliott and Lori_. He will not be concerning himself with your relationship, except in terms of Elliott and Lori's relationship to you."

 _"Well thanks for asking for my permission!"_ Lori cried indignantly.

I crossed my arms. " _Really?_ _Now_ you're upset? _Who's being a jerk now?"_

Lori glanced at me, opened her mouth to say something unpleasant, maybe take back the nice treatment she'd given me at the hospital, but Spike, apparently in possession of an ear slug, spoke first. "Elliott, please do not collect treasures of hurt."

I rolled my eyes. _"Easy for you to say._ "

Spike didn't reply to that, he just stared at me expectantly.

"What? What do you suggest? _Apologize for something she did?_ "

 _"What I did!_ " Lori shouted.

Spike let out a snarling cat sound, holding up a silencing finger. "Elliott is expressing his feelings now. Wait your turn. You will get a full uninterrupted vent afterwards."

Lori scoffed at this, but said nothing, probably because Roy was chuckling.

 _"Elliott_ , what would you like to have from _Lori_ , _in abundance?"_

"Respect," I blurted.

Spike's eyes seemed to be saying that was an okay goal, but I thought it was lame, so I added, in a lower tone, _"Love._ "

Lori sighed through her nose. _"Is it my turn now?"_

"That depends," said Spike. _"What kind of treasure are you sharing?"_

She crossed her arms. _"What exactly did Tolmina tell you about us?"_

Our little orange friend shrank nervously at the comment.

 _"Enough,_ " said Spike. "He said you... _Were not adverse_ to the idea of a nennop."

Lori frowned. Instead of replying to his comment, she asked, "You're talking about _stamp collecting_ , aren't you?...Saving up a bunch of complaints until you can 'spend' them in an argument?"

Spike raised an eyebrow ridge. _"Is that a pastime of yours?"_

I snorted, started nodding my head.

 _"Not really_ ," she answered. "I just read about it in a self help book."

 _"That...does not sound helpful to me._ Perhaps you and Elliott should begin collecting... _love stamps._ "

I blushed.

Lori frowned a little at Spike, patted his head.

"Jerk," Charlie said. I didn't want to repeat my earlier mistakes, so I just yelled, "Charlie, shut up!"

"Jerk," he repeated.

"You can talk intelligently," I growled. "Stop playing stupid games."

"You have a nennop," Charlie answered.

"I can tell that word offends you," Spike said. "You should explain your feelings to Charlie."

I scowled at him. "Like, _how it hurts my feelings?_ "

Charlie whimpered. "I'm sorry. _I just thought it was a funny word._ "

"It's okay," I sighed. "I guess I kinda earned the title, after all I did."

Charlie nuzzled me.

Roy only heard half of all that because he was having his own dialog with whom he called 'Mister Toad.' He ended up resignedly accepting the stranger's services just to get him out of the way. We _were_ in a hurry to help Gertie, after all.

Why was Tolmina there to begin with? It seemed ET had sent him a few messages while we were at the hospital.

It actually turned out to be a good idea, because none of us had thought to pack anything. Well, except for a few random odds and ends inside Vadful's saddle bags.

Spike was the most prepared out of all of us, he'd packed pallets and food and even a sophisticated, very compact sort of tent for us to sleep under. Tolmina also brought food and some supplies. Of course you know this meant we all suddenly became beasts of burden. Vadful only let his master saddle him with so much.

"Okay, chief," Roy said to ET. "Where to?"

Vorxora consulted his map a moment, then we were off down a rocky trail.

 _"Dream...the impossible dream..."_ Roy sang to himself. "Great, now I've got that song stuck in my head."

The coral wasn't the only thing oddly not submerged under water. As we walked along, a mass of tiger shrimp, like you'd see in the bottom of an aquarium, but more than six inches in length, scattered out of our way like cockroaches when a light switch comes on.

Retreating to a safe distance, they continued stuffing their translucent bodies with dirt and grime from the trail, feelers wiggling around unmoving black eyeballs.

"Eeew!" Lori cried with a shudder. " _That's...Horrible!_ "

Roy shrugged. "Oh, _I dunno_ might taste good with some garlic, butter and Parmesan breadcrumbs.."

"Stop," I said. "You're making _me_ hungry, and I'm not even supposed to eat stuff like that."

"What, _you allergic?_ "

 _"Something like that."_

 _"He's Jewish,"_ Lori said.

"I thought they just couldn't eat shellfish."

"Shrimp has a shell."

"You ate bugs earlier today. Just saying."

Our alien companions got confused by our kosher talk, so we had to explain some things as we hiked.

We saw neither hide nor hair of our enemies, Sovirox and his associates seemingly having found something better to do than terrorize us.

I asked ET if it were right for us to go on a quest to save Gertie when Sovirox had basically told me his plans of overthrowing the government, but he told me he'd informed someone already, and when I expressed further concern, he added, _"I thought you wanted to save your sister_ " and "We'll worry about that later."

We stopped for lunch. I can't say that our meals were much better than, I don't know, _cooking up land shrimp_ , but it was okay. Pete said he preferred his bug and vegetable pockets with a little more seasoning on them, but otherwise we didn't have that many complaints. We were _starved._ We made it past the well established point on ET's map, arriving at a blank portion we weren't so sure of, our route a mere suggestion based on half verified rumors and legends.

Night fell. Although we had light from the twin moons, stars and glowing coral, we still decided to stop and rest for the night, to make good progress and have a well lit view of any obstacles ahead.

Our tents were built like umbrellas. You stuck a pole into a tarp on the ground and the roof spread out with a locking lever. Secondary 'wings' unfurled as the main center piece popped out. You didn't have to fight it like an earth tent.

It covered a fair amount of ground, the major drawback being the issue of height. Roy complained that he'd slept in _pup tents_ taller than that. Still, it worked well enough for our purposes, and it even had some sophisticated type of 'windows', and I'm not talking about some cheap vinyl or nylon screen. You actually had a clear view of the sky and everything.

Our big feathery beast had to stay outside, of course.

Gertie, having done nothing all day but rest, again knocked on her egg. Of course, by now she knew how to open it herself, so it came open while Roy was reaching for the buttons.

After asking where we were, and getting an update, she sat up a little, introduced herself to Pete.

"What do you got?" he asked her, a hint of a sob edging into his voice. _"Cancer?_ "

Gertie shook her head. She looked like she wanted to give an explanation, but couldn't breathe well enough for it.

"Maybe when she gets better, she can explain what happened," I said.

Gertie coughed a few times. Roy gave her some water, which helped a little. At least she could talk then. "I fought... _Sovirox_. And his...people. Elliott ( cough) trouble, so I ( cough) him off the tree. I -" She broke into a coughing fit. " _Sovirox attacked me_ , and his _mushroom guy_ (cough) thing with claws-"

That's about all we could get out of her.

She kept coughing.

"Shh, don't try to talk," Roy said, rubbing her head. "You need to rest."

"I'm tired of resting. _It's so boring in here._ "

 _"I know, sweetie._ There really isn't that much we can do about it."

Tolmina set up something with his communicator so it could play a kind of game, showed her the basics of it. It was educational, showing her how to arrange words in Qulpari, with some science lessons here and there, meteorology, alien biology, as well as music and history. It kinda kept her busy while the rest of us slept.

That, and listening to Pete yabber. Apparently he ran away from home after he lost his mom (didn't care much for his dad, I guess) getting 'abducted' shortly afterward ( it sounded like he actually stowed away on a Qulpari ship) I suppose it's understandable, considering what he went through.

The boy gave Gertie his stuffed toy. He called it `Rocket', telling her stories about how the raccoon was some kind of brave wisecracking space alien with expert weapon skills, how it could protect anyone (though it didn't actually have weapons, or clothes to put them in). It was kind of cute how she believed him, and pressed Rocket close to her chest.

In the early pre-dawn hours, when everyone else ( including Gertie) was asleep, I heard a familiar voice singing outside the tent.

 _"Can you hear me...Can you hear me calling?"_

When trying to get my attention, Dad would sometimes jauntily quote _Silent Running_ by Mike and the mechanics. This is why, when I heard it, my eyelids flew open in surprise.

The voice called my name.

Scarcely believing what I was hearing, I rushed to a window. Although Charlie had originally curled up next to me on my pallet, he rolled over in his sleep, so didn't notice me getting up.

It wasn't just a voice. _I saw someone outside._

The square jaw, slick black hair, beard stubble, the eyes. He was dressed in a NASA flight suit, but that was the only weird thing. "Dad?"

The man smiled at me. "Elliott! _They told me you'd be here!_...C'mon, kid. We've got a ship waiting. _Let's get you home."_

I furrowed my brow. "I...can't. Gertie's sick. It's something you can't treat on earth. We're trying to find a doctor."

 _"Out here?"_ He laughed.

I sighed. "It's our only hope we have of finding a cure."

"Come outside," he said. "Let's talk."

I didn't see anything particularly wrong with that, so I slipped out of the tent and walked with him, down a nearby trail.

"How'd you get here?" I asked.

"Your science teacher's very clever. He rigged up a little space shuttle to come after you."

"Yeah, but how'd you find the secret base in the moon? How'd you find this planet? How'd you get the air and supplies? Did you come all this way in your own shuttle, or did you have have help from the Qulpari?"

He took a deep breath. "Actually, _we had a little help from the U.S. government._ Turns out they were just as interested in locating you as I was. _Your teacher_ figured out a way to track your equipment, and your guys on the moon had _their own tracker_ they were willing to part with. None of them came with us, but they _did_ give us some supplies to help us along. I kinda fibbed about my intentions, of course."

I stopped in my tracks. _"Wait, who's we? Who's here with you?"_

"Hey! Ed!" Dad called to someone behind a clump of Coral. "Come out here!"

 _Mr. Sigler_ stepped out of the dark, giving me a warm smile. He wore a NASA flight suit too. " _There's_ our young man!...What happened to your friend?"

I thought maybe that Ed wasn't Mr. Sigler's first name, but was too excited to ask Dad about it. " _Back at the tent._ We're trying to get medical help for my sister."

As he started saying apologies, _Mom_ came rushing out, pulling me into her arms. "Elliott! _Oh my God! I was so worried!"_

We held each other and wept for joy.

Once our eyes had dried a little, she sniffed and said, "Where's your sister?"

I told her what happened, and what we were doing. She looked sad, but seemed to think we were making a good decision.

"So...you and Dad are back together?"

She nodded. " _For now._ We were both worried sick. We might have our disagreements, but we both love you and want you back home."

I swallowed. "As soon as Gertie is better, I'll go anywhere with you."

She nodded. "Elliott, we brought some stuff for you. I didn't have that long to pack, but I thought you'd appreciate some _snacks_ and _fresh clothes_...We got some of your favorite books, and an old stuffed rabbit you used to like..."

"Mom, _you didn't have to.._."

She gave me a look like it wasn't any trouble. "Our ship's a few yards down the trail..."

I glanced the other way, wondering if I could figure out how to return to camp.

"Don't worry, sport," Dad said, rubbing my head. "We won't leave without them."

A few more feet down the trail, I at last saw their ship.

Pretty impressive. Built by actual NASA engineers, it resembled the ball end of that space station from _2001_.

Roy should have staked me down again. If i knew what would happen next, I would have begged for it.

When mom led me to the open hatch on the side of the space ship, I noticed an odd translucency, and then, as I stepped on the boarding ramp, instead of clomping up a solid piece of metal, my feet sank into something wet and squishy.

I turned back, looking questioningly at Mom and Dad, but as I stared at them, they both became insubstantial spook lights floating in the dark.

The ship vanished, revealing a vast revealing a vast pool of lime gray gelatinous substance, surrounded by armies of those oversized aquarium shrimp things, all waving their feelers at me.

I looked down and saw I was sinking deeper in the stuff.

I tried to wade out of it and run, but then dozens of glistening arm-like limbs whipped out of the slime, pulling me back in.

A huge yawning mouth appeared in the ooze, making sounds like massive air bubbles escaping from a tar pit.

I screamed as the things grasping extensions sucked me into its gaping maw.

I went under, into the depths.


	36. Chapter 36: The Blob

When our town's TV station stopped showing _Elvira_ in the evenings, the guy from the local Toyota dealership sponsored a 'Friday Night Fright Night' program for awhile. _Attack of the Killer Tomatoes_ , a movie about worms that I rained down from the sky and drilled into people's bodies, and the remake of _The Blob_.

I never wanted to be a short lived 'extra' , especially in _The Blob_ , but that seemed to be my fate.

As I got pulled under, my first thought had been that Sovirox had somehow tricked me again, but I had seen no sight of him anywhere around this 'bog', and he was the kind that preferred to watch me get devoured by fungus, not some random slime monster hidden in the wilderness. Besides, how would he have found me anyway? _Even I_ didn't know where I was!

The thing engulfed me like an amoeba. I screamed until slime filled my lungs and I could no longer breathe. Deeper and deeper I sank into the viscous substance, every part in my flesh tingling from the seeping fluid.

At one point, I swore I heard it speaking to me.

I fought and struggled to make my way back to the surface, but the blob seized my arms and legs, forcing me further into the deep.

It turned out the thing had a bottom. As the fluid reached its blackest point, I dropped through a hole, into open air.

I fell for a few feet, landing painfully on a rocky floor. Nothing got broken, though, as I still wore my gliding cape, and the height was comparable to hopping off the low sloping roof of my friends back porch.

I was in a cave, illuminated by glowing coral and luminescent Moss of some type. I staggered ahead, trying to get my bearings.

I didn't know where I was, but I knew I had to get out. I wandered forward, eyes searching nervously around for loose rocks, pitfalls, suspicious looking shadows.

Up ahead, I saw a red glow.

At first, I thought it to be Sovirox, and made to turn and run, but then I noticed it pulsating in a warm familiar way.

When I'd seen my alien friend in a body bag all those weeks ago, and afterwards, when he'd been standing in the back of a government truck, alive, his heart had glowed exactly like that. This, and the accompanying thrumming sound, encouraged me to come closer.

The moment I started after the alien, he scampered away into the dark, leaving me running after his faint glow.

I turned a corner, entering a chamber with strange reliefs carved into the wall, the only one vaguely recognizable being a pair of bronze era oil lamps. On its floor, I found a pool of glowing water.

As I leaned over, trying to see what made it glow, it rippled, and I could see through it like a window into a bizarre scene. It was my family, seated around a dinner table in my old house in California. My whole family was there, Mom, Dad, older brother, Gertie, all wearing kippots. They had a menorah on the table, and it looked like they'd just had a Seder meal.

I saw myself enter through the front door.

"You're late," Dad said. "We had the observance and ate without you."

ET, with a napkin on his head, quietly nibbled on the last piece of matzo.

Mom ate a piece of bacon. " _There's still some food left..."_

I looked around, but the only thing left over was a Kahlua pig and a plate of shrimp.

Michael picked up a shofar, the ceremonial ram's horn, playing the same notes I heard coming from the trees earlier.

"That was a nightmare I had a few weeks ago!" I cried. "Who's doing this!"

Looked around, but saw no one. I shivered in horror at what might be the cause of such a ghastly thing.

"Why does this disturb you?" asked a disembodied voice.

Whoever it was, it didn't sound like ET. In fact, it didn't even sound like someone I'd ever met before. I looked around, but saw nobody, just a Reese's pieces on the ground.

"Who are you!"

"A friend." ET's mouth was moving, but the voice sounded strange, and I could feel its vibrations throughout my entire body.

"How are you pulling this out of my head? Why are you showing me this?"

This person, or thing in charge, whoever it was, didn't answer my question. Instead, it asked, once again, "Why does this imagery disturb you?"

I didn't know who it was that I spoke to, but I still felt I had to say something in my defense. "It offends me because..." I knew at this point better to waste time with complicated terms that aliens didn't understand, like 'Jewish.' "...It's against my religious beliefs. Uh... _against what my god tells me to do._ "

ET, or the thing impersonating him, paused in thought. "What is God?"

A glowing bearded man appeared in the water.

"You must obey a thing that is not real?" it asked.

"No, no," I protested. "He _is_ real!"

"You have not seen it."

" _No_...Just because you can't prove He exists doesn't mean He doesn't. Anyways, _no one can see him and live."_

"This thing sounds _dangerous._ It threatens you into doing what it orders you you to do?"

"No, it, _He_ does what's best for us."

"You cannot consume animal meat. Like the Qulpari."

 _"Most animal meat._ "

"Why?"

"Because He says not to."

"No other reason?"

"It's...Bad for your health."

"Because he will kill you if you disobey."

"Well, _no..._ "

"Is there a law regarding the cleaning of teeth? _That also has health benefits..._ "

"Um , no. They didn't have toothbrushes back then."

 _"You obey outdated rules. Why?"_

"They're not outdated. Just because they don't cover everything doesn't mean that they're meaningless."

"I see." The ET thing paused in thought. _"This food is not food."_

I furrowed my brow. "What?"

"This...food is not food. It is a thing that represents something else. "

"You're reading my mind," I stammered. "What do you want?"

"I have been alone for centuries. I must understand you before I absorb you into my being."

I trembled in terror. "But I don't want to be absorbed into your being! Go away from me!"

"No."

I ran down a passage, but the place was a maze of tunnels, many doubling back on each other, and the voice followed me.

"Why is your food not food?"

"It's my subconscious," I whimpered. "I don't know. Maybe... _Something I've done in my life isn't kosher."_

 _"Hmm."_

This thing, it seemed, could mess with people's minds, without any outside help from beings like Sovirox. This I discovered when I looked down and saw that I hadn't gone anywhere. I still stood directly above the glowing pool. In the water, I could see the scene continue to unfold.

A group of men in white hazmat suits entered the house. They looked like the government guys that had had been trying to capture me and ET earlier, but with swastika armbands and double lightning bolts printed across the chests. My family saw them, but sat frozen at the table. I watched helpless as each got carried away like department store mannequins.

At last I got the ability to move. I broke into a run, fleeing down a hallway, but the men ran just as quickly.

I threw open Gertie's bedroom door.

The strange vision ended, the water resuming its glowing once more.

The voice spoke again, but it was faint now.

"What?"

When I looked down at the Reese's pieces, I now saw a _trail_ of them, leading further into the cavern. I followed.

I didn't eat the things, of course (although edible looking, I couldn't trust my eyes anymore), I just looked to see where they went.

The trail of Reese's led me into a cavern lined with strange mosaics that looked like they'd been drawn with an Atari.

A Qulpari in a hole in the ground.

A Qulpari levitating out.

A Qulpari on a green field grabbing dots.

A Qulpari being chased by a stick man.

A purple spherical spacecraft.

The spacecraft in the air.

The candy came to an abrupt end on top of what appeared to be a marble headstone. I read the inscription and wept.

"Stop this!" I sobbed. "What is this to you? _Some kind of game?_ "

In ET's voice, it replied, "I am trying to understand."

As crazy as it sounds, _the voice seemed to be coming from a piece of candy!_

I picked it up, stared at it. "This isn't helping either of us one bit. _What are you?_ I _know_ you're not literally candy."

"I am Ihyokxa."

The Reese's pieces turned into a glowing plasma that merged into my hand and vanished.

I blinked and found myself buried under piles of stuffed animals inside Gertie's old bedroom closet.

I tried to climb out, but the moment I did, I noticed blinding white light shining through the Venetian blinds, the gloved fingers of hazmat suited Nazis prying open the slats to look in. I climbed back in the closet, hoping they didn't see me.

Seconds later, those slatted doors came swinging open, and I found ET staring back at me. He screamed.

The next thing I knew, the hazmat Nazis burst into the room, dragging me off to a lab.

And there me and ET lay, on matching examination tables, suited figures hovering over each of us with scalpels.

As I watched with helpless horror at a surgeon pressing a blade into ET's chest, I noticed my own rib cage opening, as if cut by an invisible blade.

The surgeon expanded the incision, pulled back the skin, pinned it down with clamps.

ET was suddenly my sister, and I had become Qulpari, screaming as the surgeon pulled my beating heart out of my chest like that guy on the temple of doom.

 _He is not of your kind,_ said the heart. _Why this reaction to his pain?_

"Love," I said.

Lori appeared next to my table. "Your species are incompatible, _but you wish to produce offspring with him?"_

I blushed. "No! Never that!"

"I do not understand."

I shook my head. I had no words to verbalize an explanation.

Then I started thinking about Gertie and started crying.

 _She_ appeared beside me now.

"Family..." The creature mused, transforming her into a Qulpari dressed in her clothing. _"Love."_

My chest glowed and pulsated like ET had once done, my heart full of pain and worry and care, of just wanting to be out of this thing's clutches and being with those I cared about.

I think all those intense emotions were too much for the thing to handle, for then the lab and everything around me broke apart like clumps of grease suspended in dish soap. I now could see that I hadn't actually moved anywhere, I still floated in the gray-green ooze. I don't even think the cavern existed.

Above the surface, I thought I saw ET, looking down on me with a grave expression on his face, but I decided it was another one of Ihyokxa's tricks.

Somehow I could breathe in the stuff, though I wasn't sure how good it was for me. I thrashed and squirmed, trying to fight my way to the surface, but I couldn't escape.

"Are you friends with Sovirox?" I asked. "I've been tricked like this before."

 _I do not know that name,_ the creature answered.

"I guess if you did, you wouldn't tell me anyway, would you?"

 _It has been lonely these many centuries. I have absorbed animals and Qulpari, but never one of you. You will become one with me and stay within me always and forever._

So, apparently no connection to Sovirox, except maybe him leading me into this trap. This creature just had attachment issues. "I don't want to stay with you! Let me go! I have to get back to my sister!"

 _I can't let you go. I must understand these foreign emotions._

"Foreign! _You ate Qulpari!_ Don't they have those too?"

"You are different. You give me thoughts and images I haven't seen before. You will be a part of me. We will become a _new thing with feeling_. My mind will become your mind, and yours will become mine. We will be together always. _I will have this 'love.'"_

"No!" I yelled, gurgling in slime. "Release me!"

I saw a vision of my mother, digging through a pile of papers. I think she was looking for a tax payment receipt.

 _See? She will be fine without you._

Mom stared at one of my old drawings from art class and suddenly burst into tears.

And then came the image of the headstone I'd seen, the one with Gertie's name chiseled into it.

"Let me go! My sister needs me!"

I _need you!_

I felt my head tingle, then, to my surprise, the fluid around me trembled like Jell-O in an earthquake.

 _What is this you have in your brain!_

All of a sudden I felt cold. _"My...brain?"_

 _You have a thing in your brain!_ A bad dead thing!

 _"Dead thing!_ What do I have in my brain?" I thought about cancer and a chill ran down my back. Did I really want to know?"

The creature didn't explain. "Begone from me!"

Without warning, the creature spat me violently into the air like a whale blowing water from its blowhole.

I came crashing down on a muddy shore amidst a scattering crowd of land shrimp. I coughed, vomited a mound of slime, then lay gasping on the ground a long time.

When I finally groaned and pulled myself into a sitting position, I noticed the blob gurgling and bellowing, and as I turned to look, I saw a neon pink color spreading across its surface. The more it spread, the more the thing boiled and let out inhuman screams.

Confused, slime caked and weary, I staggered back in the general direction of the tent, wondering if this is what a Ghostbuster felt like.

'Dad' had lied to me. I had no idea how to get back, and the glowing coral and the moons, which should have made my search easier, actually made it difficult to find our brightly illuminated encampment.

In my wanderings, I passed an obelisk covered in indecipherable carvings, the very same type of mysterious object my alien friends on the moon had mentioned as I described my confusion about _Captain Power._ The obelisk, up close, yielded no more enlightening secrets to me than the stone heads at Easter Island. ..unless they were an ancient warning about the talking slime thing.

"Elliott!"

I looked around for a moment before noticing the winged shape flitting between the coral. After all I'd been through, I couldn't help but wonder if it were another one of Ihyokxa's illusions. "Charlie! _Boy am I glad to see you!_ I'm lost! How do I get back?"

"You aren't going back," said a voice.

Waves of black slime came rolling in from nearby giant coral, solidifying into the shape of the rotting Qulpari thing with the mushroom hat. _"You've had my tracker in your brain this whole time._ I hope you didn't think you escaped me."


	37. Chapter 37: Xetgupa's Ring

I had nowhere to run. The slimy black thing had created weird... _figures_ from its obsidian ooze that followed me around, blocking my retreat. Charlie made frustrated noises as he flitted about in the trees, watching it happen.

I stared at the monstrous creature in front of me. It didn't have eyes to look into, just empty sockets, but I looked that way just to show I was unafraid. "What are you? How did you get like this?"

It answered, in a voice (and breath) like sewage bubbling up in a sink, "I am Xetgupa, though that and all other associated knowledge will soon become irrelevant." The monster smiled, growling out a command: " _Come close so that I may feed._ "

I did not. "You must think I'm an idiot."

The monster raised its goopy claws, beckoning to me like it intended to draw me in with invisible rope.

I quickly saw an expression of dismay cross the thing's features. " _What did you do!"_

I shrugged. _"Nothing. Why?"_ Did Ihyokxa do something to the 'implant' this thing put in me? I silently wondered.

My comment seemed to infuriate the rotting creature. Without a word, he rushed up and blew mold spores on me like an aerosol spraycan.

Obviously, it wasn't great to breathe that stuff in. It got in my nose and mouth, and I felt my airways closing up.

I broke into a coughing fit, collapsing on the ground as I gasped for air.

A shifting mound of slime coursed up along the dirt, shot up my rapidly shrinking passages.

I felt something go up into my nose to my brain, and I blacked out.

I awoke to find myself vomiting pink slime, coughing as my breathing slowly returned to normal. I felt as if I'd just reached the end of a bad flu and could see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Upon righting myself, I noticed that I now stood in a pool of pink slime, my enemy Xetgupa now sprawled flat on the soil, body slowly crumbling apart, looking like a weird white sculpture of some sort, bony witch fingers frozen in the act of reaching for me. I'm really not sure what happened, but he wasn't moving and kind of resembled a skeleton.

When I looked around, I found a path clear for an escape.

However, as I made my way to a safer part of this strange coral forest, I noticed something glittering on the ground next to my fallen enemy's crumbling skull. A large golden hoop, shaped like one of those super fast Frisbees with the hole in the middle, but big enough to put your head through.

Tarnished and oddly weathered looking, it seemed to be more or less of the same dimensions as the base of Xetgupa's 'coolie hat.' I watched the object for a moment, trying to decide if Xetgupa were truly dead or just baiting me into a trap.

If it was a trap, Xetgupa was doing a good job of playing dead. Of course, _this was also someone who played dead inside a tree for a decade_ , so I knew I had to be _at least a little_ cautious.

 _I definitely wanted to show that Frisbee thing to someone._ I figured ET or one of his friends would be able to tell me what it was, or what it did. At the very least, I could prove that Xetgupa was no more, like that broom on the _Wizard of Oz_.

And so I cautiously reached for the ring.

The moment I lay hold of it, the skeletal hand grabbed me, and Xetgupa spoke something incomprehensible in a gurgling voice. I screamed out of reflex.

I expected something more to happen, but the bony fingers froze in place around my wrist, and no more fart smelling breaths ushered from his mouth.

Shuddering, I gave Xetgupa's hand a vigorous shake and it broke off at the wrist joint, still dangling from where it grasped me. I transferred the hoop to my other hand, gave the decaying appendage a more violent shake, and the monster (and its claw), made no more attempts at attacking me.

Obviously I didn't hang around there. Although I saw no traces of the black ooze (it had been somehow replaced with the pink substance) I didn't like the look of the place, wanted to be away to a safer location. I hurried off.

The ring seemed to... _vibrate_ in my hands somehow. It reminded me of the sensation you get after holding the handle of a running lawnmower for a long time. I hoped it didn't have any toxic effects like lead poisoning.

Charlie had been lurking in the treetops during this whole exchange. Not like I blame him, really. Besides me being a jerk to him, he wasn't any sort of superhero, and wasn't even immune to large falling moon rocks. Now that he saw it was safe, he swooped down and nuzzled me, frowning somewhat when he noticed my sliminess.

I furrowed my brow. _"You were watching me, right?"_

He misunderstood. "I am sorry I not help."

"No, no, I mean, _what just happened?"_

"You...get sprayed with fungus. You...look sick. _Then Xetgupa look sick_ , he double over, he die." Apparently that's all he knew.

I stared at him. "How did you know how to find me in the first place?"

Charlie made a shrugging gesture. "I follow your scent, see large amounts of kootala following a something. I find the something was you."

I gawked, still not used to having full conversations with him. "Uh...how did you know to come looking for me?"

Charlie purred. "I was missing alien soft warm body. I roll over and find no Elliott. _Wonder where he is?"_

I sighed. "You at least know how to get back to camp?"

He gave me a nod. _"Follow."_

It appeared I had wandered a little too far in the wrong direction, so I was in for a walk. We traveled in silence for awhile.

"Thanks for finding me. I probably would have been wandering around in this place forever."

 _"Hmmm,"_ Charlie replied.

Then, after a long silence, "I'm... _starting to remember things_...You...killed me. With a large rock."

I paled, wondered if he'd abandon me...Or worse, that he was another illusion sent by Ihyokxa. I mean, this talk _was_ about as expected as _Dad_ showing up. "I'm sorry. It was an accident. I didn't know what I was doing. _I didn't even know I_ had _powers like that_ , let alone how to use them! Besides, your people were trying to hurt us. Sure, it was a test, but it backfired on you. Still, I'm sorry. I didn't want to kill you."

 _"Hmmm."_ It sounded like grumbling, even _scoffing_ , perhaps. "I've been thinking about the time you attacked me, too. Trying to murder someone...That is not a fair response to an insult."

I felt a chill. He wasn't even speaking in pidgin like he'd been a few seconds ago. What if this _was_ a trick? _"Are you really Charlie?"_

"Why wouldn't I be? _Is it my improved Qectugo speech?_ As I said, _I'm starting to remember things..._ You are a violent child. _"_

I stopped, almost ready to cry. _"What do you want?_ I said I'm sorry! If I could take it back I would! It's not going to happen again, can't you see I already feel bad enough about that as it is?"

When he didn't reply, I added, "If you're still holding grudges about that, you can just go...and let me wander off and die somewhere."

Charlie purred. "That is not necessary. I just wanted you to know how much I am forgiving you."

"Why? _For blackmail?_ " The alien looked baffled. _"What is that?_ "

I smiled and shook my head. No way I was giving him _that idea!_ "Nothing. Thank you."

We continued our hike. "Charlie, do you know anything about a Qulpari named Ihyokxa?"

He shook his head. "I have been living on your moon a long time there is much about my home world I am ignorant about."

I smirked, petting him. "Thanks."

I showed him the hoop. "You know what this thing is?"

Charlie made a face like he knew what it was, then shrugged and gave me an `I dunno' noise. I gave up trying with him.

I couldn't tell if it were my imagination, or real, but things around me, the plants, land shrimp, even _Charlie_ , seemed to be _aging very slightly_ as I walked, and it seemed to correspond with the vibrating gold thing I had clutched in my hand. I began to feel a bit...unsettled.

After a few more minutes of traversing the glowing alien landscape, we once more encountered our tent.

With Roy standing in front of it, arms crossed indignantly. _"So where'd you wander off to this time?"_

His guess his guess was as good as mine. "Um, I dunno."

The skepticism was clear on his facial expressions. "What, _you found another tree?_ Unleashed some more of Darth Vader's deadly goons?"

"Um... _no?"_

Norenio looked worried for me, but not angry...Relieved I was okay, but Lori was scowling, hands on her hips. Even Vadful, hitched to a post near the tent, looked a bit angry at my disappearance.

Tiffrid the nennop observed us mutely, I guess making silent assessments of the psychology of the situation.

Roy sighed. " _You're all wet!_ You go skinny dipping or something?"

 _"Something,"_ I muttered.

He grabbed a clump of my hair. "What, were you taking a bath in snot? _What is this stuff?"_

"Hell if I know!" I showed him the gold Frisbee thing. "Do you have any idea what this thing is?"

I could tell he didn't have the foggiest. "Probably just a piece of scrap metal. Qulpari don't think too highly of gold and silver."

Then why was Xetgupa wearing it? I wondered. "You know something about a Qulpari named Ihyokxa?"

Roy shook his head. "You're probably better off asking your buddy Vorxora..." He scowled. "Maybe you can see about getting a _towel,_ too. You're going to smear that crap all over the place otherwise."

I entered the tent. Tolmina and Spike smiled at me as I entered the tent, pleased, I guess, that I wasn't dead and got back in one piece.

Gertie was glad to see me again. It seemed, against everyone's advice, she had decided to keep her protective litter open until I returned, and even tried to hug me before Roy scolded her and ordered her back into the litter.

Seeing that amount of energy and enthusiasm from her...It made me hopeful. "Is she... _doing better?_ "

Gertie coughed several times, feebly resigning herself to her floating bed.

"I guess not." I squeezed her hand before remembering that I was coated in slime.

"She's breathing a little better," said Pete. "But I dunno. Sick people often seem better when they're not."

Alien towels are unusual. As thin as a piece of paper, they come in something resembling a _notebook_ , but they're super strong, long enough to wrap around a Qulpari body, and swell up to the size of a hotel bath towel once they absorb liquid. There's also a little portable laminator looking thing you run the dirty ones through, to both extract liquids and remove dirt.

"ET," I asked as I was drying off. "Do you know anything about a Qulpari named Ihyokxa?"

His neck got really short when he heard the name. It seemed I had said something that disturbed him. "Ihyokxa is not a Qulpari. It is a _thing._ Some call it _Curdiru_ , or _Ofwevon the ancient_. It is described as an intelligence embodied in a liquefied form. A liquid consciousness. As far as I know, it is only a legend. They said that it has existed since the beginning of time and devours all it comes across. I have heard that very few, if any, have seen Ihyokxa and lived to tell the tale."

I shrugged. _"I met it._ Sovirox's friend Xetgupa...he put something in me...and I guess it killed it."

ET laughed, an uncharacteristically mad barking laugh that indicated he didn't believe me.

"And you have also met Xetgupa." ET's tone seemed skeptical. I nodded, telling him everything that happened.

That was when I decided to show him the gold Frisbee.

"What is this thing?"

ET extended his neck, stared at it, then his head jerked back like a turtle reacting to a flame in front of its face. "Where did you get that!"

"I think...Xetgupa was wearing it...he... _died somehow._ "

"Ooh!" Lori cried when she saw the object. "That's pretty! _Might make a good necklace!_ " she grabbed it, put it around her neck.

"No!" ET shouted. The hoop flew off her neck, hovering in the air. "This isn't mere jewelry! This is the _Walseru_ _coz_ _Vipsada_ , the disk of time. Some call it the hoop of decay. It is said that the object can make a thing mature, ferment, produce fruit, rot or die!"

" _A magic ring that ages things?_ " Lori scoffed. _"That's silly!"_

Was it my imagination, or did she suddenly look more beautiful than before? I caught myself staring, with my mouth hanging open, at her without meaning to, wondering if there wasn't at least some truth to this legend.

She stared back, and after reddening a little, asked "What?"

I shook my head. "What purpose of that kind of...object be useful for?"

ET gave me a look that implied I was not as smart as he originally thought. "Growing crops, creating alcohols, improving livestock, cultivating medicines from various fungi... _possibly withering one's enemy."_

"If it does all that, " I said. "Why was he wearing it around his head? Surely he didn't _want_ to turn into a rotten mushroom thing!"

"It does not damage the wearer, not at the beginning. They must first use the power of the thing. it seems, in this case, _it went to his head._ "

"It really wasn't a good necklace anyway, " Lori muttered. "They're supposed to _dangle, not stick out like a dog collar."_

I regarded the object with discomfort. "Does it... _age things just by sitting around?_ Do we need to bury it or something?"

ET shook his head. _"Everything ages a little with each passing second._ That being said, I do not suggest prolonged contact with it, or using your powers near it."

Spike placed it in a little box for us. I kind of wished it were lead lined, but nobody had anticipated me coming into possession of such an object to begin with, so we only had a useless looking wooden tote.

ET no longer seemed to doubt my story. In fact, he looked grave. "Xetgupa was Sovirox's mate. I doubt he will take this well. This incident may place all of our lives in harm's way."

I swallowed, gave a solemn nod.

"As far as Ihyokxa is concerned, if you have truly faced him, I fear this is not the end of it. If you remember a way back to the creature, I would try to forget it."

"Are you awake enough to travel?" Roy asked me as he climbed, stooped over, into the child sized tent. "We've wasted a lot of time here waiting for you already. If we're going to do this thing and help your sister, we'd better get on with it."

"I'll manage."

The tent came down and got stowed away just as easily as it got set up. In no time we were hoofing it through the coral forest again.

As stated before, ET was charting our course seemingly at random, basing our route on the half remembered stories and crudely sketched maps of Qulpari who claimed to have found what they were looking for in that place.

All of this was okay at first, because, here and there, we'd found _actual dirt trails_ , indications that someone had journeyed that way before. Unfortunately, now we had no such indicators, and had to go on nothing but the vague directions and approximate coordinates of old legends. Our progress slowed.

At one point, Roy got so frustrated with ET and the others that he insisted we all go back to the hospital, but ET quickly explained that he wasn't lost, they just needed a few moments to decipher the instructions, and we soon continued onward.

I marched up alongside Roy. "So _really._ How _have_ you been earning money all this time? I know what you told me, _but that was still kind of vague._ "

He shrugged. "It's _employment_ that's a vague. My career is a little... _freeform._ Sometimes I donate blood to science, or I cook...help Qulpari reach stuff that's above their heads, construction work... Let's just call it ' _general labor_.'"

"And Norenio...she just gets her money from the restaurant?"

" _Just!_ " he exclaimed. "She's a damn fine cook! Sure, _she'd get paid better if she were a librarian_ , oddly enough, but..."

We passed shiny, leathery plants suggestive of Joshua trees, wincing at their pungent ammonia scent.

I noticed Pete busy fashioning a doll out of some fibrous wood like sticks he'd found lying about. When I asked, he said he was making something for Gertie, and thought he might call it `Rooty' or `Sticky' or maybe `Groovy', he didn't know yet.

We walked.

"They never finished my marking," Lori complained. "I'm still obligated to...Whatever punishment I'm supposed to be getting, aren't I?"

"I don't know," I admitted. "I mean, the guy you stole from is technically dead, and he was into a lot of stuff that should be considered illegal, so I don't know how much you can be obligated for something like that. _The bracelet belongs to Gertie now anyway..."_

She let out a frustrated sigh. "I just hope I don't end up in a...another alien jail."

 _"I'll take care of it,"_ said Spike. "I have pull with the Orbuva."

We stopped briefly for a light breakfast of leftovers, and I got introduced to _buvca_ , a fermented beverage that's loaded with caffeine. Apparently it makes Abreyas very drunk, but not humans, which explained a few things about Norenio's relationship with Roy, and led to some awkward discussions with the nennop along our march, Norenio accusing Roy of taking unfair advantage. I tried to ignore them and watch the scenery.

We saw some strange animals along the way, an alien turtle with runes along its back...storks with mudskipper faces and leathery wings...there were sections of purple dirt where I saw what looked like red rocks crawling across them.

"ET," I said. "You warned me about using my powers with...that hoop. Does that mean I still have some?"

He nodded. "You have the ones that count."

While we traveled, Roy insisted that Gertie stay inside her protective egg and not open the lid. She wasn't happy about the arrangement, but we (especially Peter) promised to talk to her the whole time, give her an up to the minute play by play of everything that was happening. She _did_ have a communicator in the litter with her. ET, being the super nice guy that he is, even made us a little jealous by having his friends make calls to her, calls we weren't always privy to.

The only thing that made me uncomfortable was how much the live video made me think of the view from inside a coffin. If I'd been in her position, I probably would have freaked out, thinking about that Alfred Hitchcock show where a woman tries to sneak out of a prison in a pine box and ends up getting buried alive.

We paused, staring as a flock of bronze colored winged creatures flew overhead.

"Where are we now?" my sister asked.

Roy waved around the communicator to give her a panoramic view. "It looks pretty."

I put my hand on the litter. "Gertie, we're going to get you better and out of that thing, if it's the last thing I do."

Our journey came to an abrupt halt at an apparent dead end at the edge of a large swampy lake populated by weird bamboo-like plants that periodically puffed out clouds of gas and spores into the air.

Roy scowled at the unwelcoming scenery. "Okay, Vorxora. We've had our little adventure. _Now it's time to get back and give this kid some real medical help._ "

ET gave him a look that seemed to say `You're an idiot', but said nothing, just raised a glowing finger.

I saw something vaguely conical and translucent shimmering in the air.

Roy gawked. "What the...?"

Spike waddled up next to him, raised his own glowing digit, and the strange object gained definition: A gold, pointy needle-like spire, like you'd see on the top of a Thai palace or temple.

Gertie's litter came open, and she sat up, raising her own hand.

Roy wasn't too happy about her doing this. "Gertie, I don't think..."

He faltered when he saw her glowing, and something like a crumbling minaret materializing out of what appeared to be empty air.

ET gave me an expectant look.

 _"Seriously?"_

His expression, in response, seemed to be `You want this?'

I shrugged, pantomiming, `What do you want from me?'

He just gave a nod toward my sister. `Well, all right,' I answered nonverbally, raising a spread open palm.

I felt a jolt, like I'd just plugged myself into a high tension power line.

I glowed, and more of the structure appeared, a roof covered in needle-like cones, weathered walls of stone blocks, with projecting sculptural details representing various exotic animals.

Lori's face was saying to me, `Am I supposed to do this too?' Then her expression changed to `If you can do it, I can.'

Indeed she could. Her chest and hand glowed, and we could see more of the stone blocks.

Now me, Gertie, Lori, and all the Qulpari glowed like radioactive, hands raised, drawing this ancient building out of seeming nonexistence.

Without asking permission, ET grabbed Roy's hand, and he arched his back, as if in pain, also glowing.

Norenio nervously put a hand on him, and she too glowed, transferred the power to the nennop via a `handshake' with their tails.

Even the giant bird, making contact with Tiffrid's body, glowed with an eerie light.

Something made a loud pop, and there was this old weather cracked edifice, undeniably real and pressing on the senses. We put our hands down, let go of each other, and stopped glowing, but the structure retained its physical presence before us.

"Did we..." Roy stammered. " _Just make that out of thin air?_ "

"I don't think so," I said. "I...think it's always been here."

We stared through a vast stone arch into a long spooky looking corridor. Beyond we could only see a stairwell and darkness as far as the eye could see.

"I see a staircase," Lori said. "Where do you think it leads?"

ET waddled ahead.

"I...think we're going to find out."


End file.
